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13 Important Life Lessons I Learnt In My 30s That I’d Like You To Know Earlier In Your 20s

13 Important Life Lessons I Learnt In My 30s That I’d Like You To Know Earlier In Your 20s

Have you ever looked back upon your younger self and thought “if only I could have told them what I know now?” Of course without learning we would never get to where we are now, so going through the process is inevitable. The silver lining however is that we can always pass our wisdom onto others in the hope that what we know might help somebody else down their path of self discovery. Some things from your 30-something self, to your 20-something self:

1. Don’t go for your dream till you’ve got enough money, you’ll never start

Patience is a virtue. If you can think sensibly and wait until you are truly ready to go after your dream, the chance of it coming true multiplies. It doesn’t mean you won’t do it. It just means you have to do it right. Hold your horses. Know when to walk and when to run.

2. Don’t care too much about what others think

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    Easier said than done, but there are certainly ways you can get better at this if you are conscious of it. Focus on the goal, not what others will think of it, or who is looking at you while you get the job done. It will be a far less anxious, and a far more rewarding journey.

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    3. Don’t place too much importance on what you look like

    Appearance is so much less important than you think. Worrying about it is attached to all the things you will keep close to you – the best friends will be the ones who care only about what kind of person you are inside.

    4. Don’t beat yourself up too much

    Don’t be too hard on yourself. Trust that you are the great person you believe you are. Don’t doubt that, even when bad things happen. It’s the best thing you can do to support yourself. Otherwise when you get to thirty you’ll be worse for wear than you need to be.

    5. Do learn everything you can. This never stops.

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      As long as we are living we are learning! This is the greatest part of consciousness. Surround yourself with greatness; great people, great opportunities. Make your learning experience the best it can be.

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      6. You’re going to make mistakes.

      If you make a mistake, move on. It happens. We can try our hardest, but we are all human, and when we do let the team down we can only be sorry and learn. Don’t dwell on it too much. Take it as a lesson for a future place where you will succeed.

      7. Don’t sweat the small stuff.

      “If you focus too hard on the lost skateboard, you won’t see the Rolls Royce parking right in front of you.” – Girlosophy

      8. Don’t worry too much about the future.

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        The future is happening regardless. Don’t worry about aging, or dying, or losing, or even winning too much. What will be will be.

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        9. Do enjoy your youth, and being that age.

        Enjoy being exactly where you are at. Look around. Focus on everything that is happening right now. It will never be just like this again. Learn to treasure that.

        10. Don’t think you know everything.

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          Never think this, no matter what age. There are always things you don’t know, and when you understand this, you keep learning wonderful things from everything you come into contact with.

          11. Do hold onto the things you care about.

          You get to choose what you treasure. If you come into contact with a good thing — hold onto it. They don’t come along all that often.

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          12. Do put your family first.

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            Family are for life! Nurture those relationships and keep those bonds strong. They will be your greatest allies in life.

            13. Do work hard at what you want.

            By the time you’re 30 you’ll most likely have it.

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            Last Updated on January 18, 2019

            7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

            7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

            Some people will have a rain cloud hanging over them, no matter what the weather is outside. Their negative attitude is toxic to your own moods, and you probably feel like there is little you can do about it.

            But that couldn’t be farther from the truth.

            If you want to effectively deal with negative people and be a champion of positivity, then your best route is to take definite action through some of the steps below.

            1. Limit the time you spend with them.

            First, let’s get this out of the way. You can be more positive than a cartoon sponge, but even your enthusiasm has a chance of being afflicted by the constant negativity of a friend.

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            In fact, negativity has been proven to damage your health physically, making you vulnerable to high levels of stress and even cardiac disease. There’s no reason to get hurt because of someone else’s bad mood.

            Though this may be a little tricky depending on your situation, working to spend slightly less time around negative people will keep your own spirits from slipping as well.

            2. Speak up for yourself.

            Don’t just absorb the comments that you are being bombarded with, especially if they are about you. It’s wise to be quick to listen and slow to speak, but being too quiet can give the person the impression that you are accepting what’s being said.

            3. Don’t pretend that their behavior is “OK.”

            This is an easy trap to fall into. Point out to the person that their constant negativity isn’t a good thing. We don’t want to do this because it’s far easier to let someone sit in their woes, and we’d rather just stay out of it.

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            But if you want the best for this person, avoid giving the false impression that their negativity is normal.

            4. Don’t make their problems your problems.

            Though I consider empathy a gift, it can be a dangerous thing. When we hear the complaints of a friend or family member, we typically start to take on their burdens with them.

            This is a bad habit to get into, especially if this is a person who is almost exclusively negative. These types of people are prone to embellishing and altering a story in order to gain sympathy.

            Why else would they be sharing this with you?

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            5. Change the subject.

            When you suspect that a conversation is starting to take a turn for the negative, be a champion of positivity by changing the subject. Of course, you have to do this without ignoring what the other person said.

            Acknowledge their comment, but move the conversation forward before the euphoric pleasure gained from complaining takes hold of either of you.

            6. Talk about solutions, not problems.

            Sometimes, changing the subject isn’t an option if you want to deal with negative people, but that doesn’t mean you can’t still be positive.

            I know that when someone begins dumping complaints on me, I have a hard time knowing exactly what to say. The key is to measure your responses as solution-based.

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            You can do this by asking questions like, “Well, how could this be resolved?” or, “How do you think they feel about it?”

            Use discernment to find an appropriate response that will help your friend manage their perspectives.

            7. Leave them behind.

            Sadly, there are times when we have to move on without these friends, especially if you have exhausted your best efforts toward building a positive relationship.

            If this person is a family member, you can still have a functioning relationship with them, of course, but you may still have to limit the influence they have over your wellbeing.

            That being said, what are some steps you’ve taken to deal with negative people? Let us know in the comments.

            You may also want to read: How to Stop the Negative Spin of Thoughts, Emotions and Actions.

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