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13 Important Life Lessons I Learnt In My 30s That I’d Like You To Know Earlier In Your 20s

13 Important Life Lessons I Learnt In My 30s That I’d Like You To Know Earlier In Your 20s

Have you ever looked back upon your younger self and thought “if only I could have told them what I know now?” Of course without learning we would never get to where we are now, so going through the process is inevitable. The silver lining however is that we can always pass our wisdom onto others in the hope that what we know might help somebody else down their path of self discovery. Some things from your 30-something self, to your 20-something self:

1. Don’t go for your dream till you’ve got enough money, you’ll never start

Patience is a virtue. If you can think sensibly and wait until you are truly ready to go after your dream, the chance of it coming true multiplies. It doesn’t mean you won’t do it. It just means you have to do it right. Hold your horses. Know when to walk and when to run.

2. Don’t care too much about what others think

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    Easier said than done, but there are certainly ways you can get better at this if you are conscious of it. Focus on the goal, not what others will think of it, or who is looking at you while you get the job done. It will be a far less anxious, and a far more rewarding journey.

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    3. Don’t place too much importance on what you look like

    Appearance is so much less important than you think. Worrying about it is attached to all the things you will keep close to you – the best friends will be the ones who care only about what kind of person you are inside.

    4. Don’t beat yourself up too much

    Don’t be too hard on yourself. Trust that you are the great person you believe you are. Don’t doubt that, even when bad things happen. It’s the best thing you can do to support yourself. Otherwise when you get to thirty you’ll be worse for wear than you need to be.

    5. Do learn everything you can. This never stops.

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      As long as we are living we are learning! This is the greatest part of consciousness. Surround yourself with greatness; great people, great opportunities. Make your learning experience the best it can be.

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      6. You’re going to make mistakes.

      If you make a mistake, move on. It happens. We can try our hardest, but we are all human, and when we do let the team down we can only be sorry and learn. Don’t dwell on it too much. Take it as a lesson for a future place where you will succeed.

      7. Don’t sweat the small stuff.

      “If you focus too hard on the lost skateboard, you won’t see the Rolls Royce parking right in front of you.” – Girlosophy

      8. Don’t worry too much about the future.

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        The future is happening regardless. Don’t worry about aging, or dying, or losing, or even winning too much. What will be will be.

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        9. Do enjoy your youth, and being that age.

        Enjoy being exactly where you are at. Look around. Focus on everything that is happening right now. It will never be just like this again. Learn to treasure that.

        10. Don’t think you know everything.

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          Never think this, no matter what age. There are always things you don’t know, and when you understand this, you keep learning wonderful things from everything you come into contact with.

          11. Do hold onto the things you care about.

          You get to choose what you treasure. If you come into contact with a good thing — hold onto it. They don’t come along all that often.

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          12. Do put your family first.

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            Family are for life! Nurture those relationships and keep those bonds strong. They will be your greatest allies in life.

            13. Do work hard at what you want.

            By the time you’re 30 you’ll most likely have it.

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            Last Updated on September 12, 2019

            12 Things You Should Remember When Feeling Lost in Life

            12 Things You Should Remember When Feeling Lost in Life

            Even the most charismatic people you know, whether in person or celebrities of some sort, experience days where they feel lost in life and isolated from everyone else.

            While it’s good to know we aren’t alone in this feeling, the question still remains:

            What should we do when we feel lost and lonely?

            Here are 12 things to remember:

            1. Recognize That It’s Okay!

            The truth is, there are times you need to be alone. If you’ve always been accustomed to being in contact with people, this may prove difficult.

            However, learning how to be alone and comfortable in your own skin will give you confidence and a sense of self reliance.

            We cheat ourselves out of the opportunity to become self reliant when we look for constant companionship.

            Learn how to embrace your me time: What Your Fear of Being Alone Is Really About and How to Get over It

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            2. Use Your Lost and Loneliness as a Self-Directing Guide

            You’ve most likely heard the expression: “You have to know where you’ve been to know where you’re going.”

            Loneliness also serves as a life signal to indicate you’re in search of something. It’s when we’re in the midst of solitude that answers come from true soul searching.

            Remember, there is more to life than what you’re feeling.

            3. Realize Loneliness Helps You Face the Truth

            Being in the constant company of others, although comforting sometimes, can often serve as a distraction when we need to face the reality of a situation.

            Solitude cuts straight to the chase and forces you to deal with the problem at hand. See it as a blessing that can serve as a catalyst to set things right!

            4. Be Aware That You Have More Control Than You Think

            Typically, when we see ourselves as being lost or lonely, it gives us an excuse to view everything we come in contact with in a negative light. It lends itself to putting ourselves in the victim mode, when the truth of the matter is that you choose your attitude in every situation.

            No one can force a feeling upon you! It is YOU who has the ultimate say as to how you choose to react.

            5. Embrace the Freedom That the Feeling of Being Alone Can Offer

            Instead of wallowing in self pity, which many are prone to do because of loneliness, try looking at your circumstance as a new-found freedom.

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            Most people are in constant need of approval of their viewpoints. Try enjoying the fact that  you don’t need everyone you care about to support your decisions.

            6. Acknowledge the Person You Are Now

            Perhaps you feel a sense of loneliness and confusion because your life circumstances have taken you away from the persona that others know to be you.

            Perhaps the new you differs radically from the old. Realize that life is about change and how we react to that change. It’s okay that you’re not who you used to be.

            Take a look at this article and learn to accept your imperfect self: Accept Yourself (Flaws and All): 7 Benefits of Being Vulnerable

            7. Keep Striving to Do Your Best

            Often those who are feeling isolated and unto themselves will develop a defeatist attitude. They’ll do substandard work because their self esteem is low and they don’t care.

            Never let this feeling take away your sense of worth! Do your best always and when you come through this dark time, others will admire how you stayed determined in spite of the obstacles you had to overcome.

            And to live your best life, you must do this ONE thing: step out of your comfort zone.

            8. Don’t Forget That Time Is Precious

            When we’re lost in a sea of loneliness and depression, it’s all too easy to reflect on regrets of past life events. This does nothing but feed negativity and perpetuate the situation.

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            Instead of falling prey to this common pitfall, put one foot in front of the other and acknowledge every positive step you take. By doing this, you can celebrate the struggles you overcome at the end of the day.

            9. Remember, Things Happen for a Reason

            Every circumstance we encounter in our life is designed to teach us and that lesson is in turn passed on to others.

            Sometimes we’re fortunate enough to figure out the lesson to be learned, while other times, we simply need to have faith that if the lesson wasn’t meant directly for us to learn from, how we handled it was observed by someone who needed to learn.

            Your solitude and feeling of lost, in this instance, although painful possibly, may be teaching someone else.

            10. Journal During This Time

            Record your thoughts when you’re at the height of loneliness and feeling lost. You’ll be amazed when you reflect back at how you viewed things at the time and how far you’ve come later.

            This time (if recorded) can give you a keen insight into who you are and what makes you feel the way you feel.

            11. Remember You Aren’t the First to Feel This Way

            It’s quite common to feel as if we’re alone and no one else has ever felt this way before. We think this because at the time of our distress, we’re silently observing others around us who are seemingly fine in every way.

            The truth is, we can’t possibly know the struggles of those around us unless they elect to share them. We ALL have known this pain!

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            Try confiding in someone you trust and ask them how they deal with these feelings when they experienced it. You may be surprised at what you learn.

            12. Ask for Help If the Problem Persists

            The feeling of being lost and lonely is common to everyone, but typically it will last for a relatively short period of time.

            Most people will confess to, at one time or another, being in a “funk.” But if the problem persists longer than you feel it should, don’t ignore it.

            When your ability to reason and consider things rationally becomes impaired, do not poo poo the problem away and think it isn’t worthy of attention. Seek medical help.

            Afraid to ask for help? Here’s how to change your outlook to aim high!

            Final Thoughts

            Loneliness and a sense of feeling lost can in many ways be extremely painful and difficult to deal with at best. However, these feelings can also serve as a catalyst for change in our lives if we acknowledge them and act.

            Above anything, cherish your mental well being and don’t underestimate its worth. Seek professional guidance if you’re unable to distinguish between a sense of freedom for yourself and a sense of despair.

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            Featured photo credit: Andrew Neel via unsplash.com

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