Advertising
Advertising

13 Important Life Lessons I Learnt In My 30s That I’d Like You To Know Earlier In Your 20s

13 Important Life Lessons I Learnt In My 30s That I’d Like You To Know Earlier In Your 20s

Have you ever looked back upon your younger self and thought “if only I could have told them what I know now?” Of course without learning we would never get to where we are now, so going through the process is inevitable. The silver lining however is that we can always pass our wisdom onto others in the hope that what we know might help somebody else down their path of self discovery. Some things from your 30-something self, to your 20-something self:

1. Don’t go for your dream till you’ve got enough money, you’ll never start

Patience is a virtue. If you can think sensibly and wait until you are truly ready to go after your dream, the chance of it coming true multiplies. It doesn’t mean you won’t do it. It just means you have to do it right. Hold your horses. Know when to walk and when to run.

2. Don’t care too much about what others think

9e8f6eb75e6a60f1398a0e60eefe49da

    Easier said than done, but there are certainly ways you can get better at this if you are conscious of it. Focus on the goal, not what others will think of it, or who is looking at you while you get the job done. It will be a far less anxious, and a far more rewarding journey.

    Advertising

    3. Don’t place too much importance on what you look like

    Appearance is so much less important than you think. Worrying about it is attached to all the things you will keep close to you – the best friends will be the ones who care only about what kind of person you are inside.

    4. Don’t beat yourself up too much

    Don’t be too hard on yourself. Trust that you are the great person you believe you are. Don’t doubt that, even when bad things happen. It’s the best thing you can do to support yourself. Otherwise when you get to thirty you’ll be worse for wear than you need to be.

    5. Do learn everything you can. This never stops.

    c7108defde5c3f593ee0152fe904d1c3

      As long as we are living we are learning! This is the greatest part of consciousness. Surround yourself with greatness; great people, great opportunities. Make your learning experience the best it can be.

      Advertising

      6. You’re going to make mistakes.

      If you make a mistake, move on. It happens. We can try our hardest, but we are all human, and when we do let the team down we can only be sorry and learn. Don’t dwell on it too much. Take it as a lesson for a future place where you will succeed.

      7. Don’t sweat the small stuff.

      “If you focus too hard on the lost skateboard, you won’t see the Rolls Royce parking right in front of you.” – Girlosophy

      8. Don’t worry too much about the future.

      904ad15605d5918e4aa896561afdd6ee

        The future is happening regardless. Don’t worry about aging, or dying, or losing, or even winning too much. What will be will be.

        Advertising

        9. Do enjoy your youth, and being that age.

        Enjoy being exactly where you are at. Look around. Focus on everything that is happening right now. It will never be just like this again. Learn to treasure that.

        10. Don’t think you know everything.

        a21ff6011913a70c378a6a51f5bfad76

          Never think this, no matter what age. There are always things you don’t know, and when you understand this, you keep learning wonderful things from everything you come into contact with.

          11. Do hold onto the things you care about.

          You get to choose what you treasure. If you come into contact with a good thing — hold onto it. They don’t come along all that often.

          Advertising

          12. Do put your family first.

          5360f86faf3a0171189bb31ab91dc7a2

            Family are for life! Nurture those relationships and keep those bonds strong. They will be your greatest allies in life.

            13. Do work hard at what you want.

            By the time you’re 30 you’ll most likely have it.

            More by this author

            25+ Quotes That Bring You Inner Peace To Face With Every Challenge What Is Lactose Intolerance And What To Do If You Have It Nutritionists Say Granola Bars Are Just Dressed Up Junk Food Researchers Explain Why People Often Feel Disappointed In The Dating World 3 Effective Home Remedies For Annoying Eczema

            Trending in 20-Something

            1 One Solid Practice for Tackling Low Self-Esteem 2 7 Tools to Optimize Your Next Long-Term Traveling Experience 3 How To Go Through College And Stay Sane 4 The Battle Of The Voices In My Head 5 How to Have the Best Spring With Your Pets

            Read Next

            Advertising
            Advertising
            Advertising

            Last Updated on May 28, 2020

            10 Success Principles for Living Your Dream Life

            10 Success Principles for Living Your Dream Life

            Are you stressed out and overwhelmed, wishing you had more time to do the things that really matter? Are you ready to do something better, something special in your life or your career?

            You were born with a gift that no one else in the world can express like you. When you dance to your own music, you naturally develop your innate abilities and excel in work and life. You are a total rock star. But when you live someone else’s idea of who you should be, it throws off your groove.

            Many people—maybe you—stopped following their dreams way too early in life because their talents were ignored, minimized, or shamed. They didn’t have the chops to win an American Idol competition or nab an Olympic gold medal, so they stopped expressing their inborn gifts altogether.

            You don’t need to be an award winner to rock your life. Living your dream life is about discovering your superpowers and feeling vibrant and joyful when you use them. It’s about owning what makes you unique and finding like-minded people to support you.

            Here are 10 success principles to help you live a rich and rewarding life on your terms that have worked with thousands of people in my workshops and will work for you, too.

            1. Get a Hobby to Move Closer to Your Dreams

            If you never became a professional dancer or a world-renowned author, it does NOT mean you should stop dancing or writing! These activities make you come alive, even if you “only” do them as favorite pastimes.

            Engaging in a hobby is one of the most important success principles you can follow to move closer to your dreams.

            When you try something creative for the first time or in a long while, you begin to see opportunities at work and in life that you were unaware of before. You also feel happier and more energized, according to a recent study from New Zealand.[1]

            Some of my most burned-out executive clients reinvigorated their careers by discovering a creative outlet that refueled them after the workday ended. Research at San Francisco State University shows that having a hobby lowers stress and helps you succeed at work.[2]

            So, give yourself permission to try new things and revisit old passions you gave up long ago. Setting aside just one hour a week for personal exploration can significantly change your life.

            Who knows? Your creative outlet could transform into a thriving business or lead to a new profession down the road.

            Advertising

            2. Focus on Your Strengths, Not Your Weaknesses

            Did you know that you are more likely to succeed when you develop your natural strengths rather than work on your weaknesses? The problem is that you probably don’t know where your true talents lie.

            Here are a few options to help you discover your unique strengths. You can:

            • Take the VIA Character Strengths Survey[3]
            • Try Gallup’s CliftonStrengths Assessment[4]
            • Answer a few Superpower Questions

            Once you understand what makes you tick, you can use these skills at work and your personal life to get more done in less time. If you boost your unique abilities through practice and study, you can accelerate your career and become a leader in a field that matters to you. It’s worth investing in yourself this way.

            3. Jumping off a Cliff is NOT Required

            Here’s the deal: most people are too afraid to change. When participants first come to my workshops, they tell me they have mouths to feed, bills to pay, and fear that if they follow their dreams, someone will get hurt.

            The old saying “leap and the net shall appear” does not comfort them. Because they are hesitant to plunge into the unknown, they believe their only option is to stay put where they are in life. Can you relate?

            You do not have to sacrifice the life you have now to start a new one. I was a psychology professor by day and singer by night for years before I transitioned into a full-time music career.

            Just take a little time out each week to do what enlivens you through a hobby, volunteer work, etc. Get a feel for it.

            Is it what you really want? If so, increase the time you spend doing it and make the transition when the time feels right.

            4. Give Your Inner Critic Some Love

            The main culprit that keeps you from stepping outside your comfort zone and getting the life of your dreams is KCRP or K-CRAP – the radio station that plays 24/7 in your head. The moment you try to do something interesting with your life it slaps you down with such chart-topping killer hooks as “Who do you think you are?” and “You’ll never be good enough!”.

            Have you ever noticed that KCRP’s mean-spirited DJ sounds like your parents, teachers, bosses, and other authority figures who shut you down creatively? These folks don’t need to stifle you any longer (although they often still do) because your inner critic does it for them. That keeps you stuck in a rut.

            To break free, try thinking of this DJ as a gruff old grandfather who gives you crap to keep you safe. Remember, this grumpy grandpa is woefully out of touch with the times. So, his stern opinions don’t really matter much, do they? Give him a pat on the back for his good intentions, and put your focus back on what makes you come alive.

            Advertising

            This success principle will give you the courage to venture into the unknown where you can dance to the beat of your own drummer.

            5. Embrace Your Inner Weirdo

            Many of us don’t go after our dreams because we’re afraid folks will find out how odd or strange we are. But our little eccentricities often turn out to be our greatest strengths. Yes, it’s good to be quirky.

            Odds are, you lost track of your true passions and talents before you were even old enough to know you were getting off-track. You became slowly “adulterated” by learning to:

            • Take on family roles that don’t match who you really are.
            • Spit back what teachers taught you in school rather than risk getting bad grades for being original.
            • Hide parts of yourself that don’t seem acceptable to certain social groups.

            The price for fitting in is that you may wind up leading a life that doesn’t fit you all that well. Your true calling becomes clear when you embrace what makes you different from others and allow yourself to stand out from the crowd, even if it feels awkward.

            Often, the very qualities you view as your flaws are your greatest gifts.

            6. See the Bigger Picture to Find Your True Calling

            I cannot stress the importance of this success principle enough. Your true calling is right in front of you. But you may miss it because you’re looking for it in the wrong place.

            To “see” it clearly, try widening your point of view.

            Case in point: Maria felt she needed to retire early from being a police detective, so she could travel abroad. I encouraged Maria to think of ways that she could continue to serve as a law enforcer (a career she loved) and travel overseas at the same time.

            A few months later, Maria landed a job with the United Nations in Bosnia training the local police force to understand and embrace human rights procedures.

            Like Maria, you are an everyday rock star capable of accomplishing greater things than you can imagine. Is what you’re looking for right in front of you, too? Do you have an inkling of what it may be?

            Look beyond your day-to-day activities, your current job, and even the town you live in. View your life from an eagle’s perspective and be open to new possibilities.

            Advertising

            7. Try a Little Wish-List Magic

            Pretend I’m your fairy godmother and I give you permission right now to be your most magnificent self. What kind of life would be music to your ears? It doesn’t matter whether it seems unattainable or even downright crazy. Write it down on a wish list.

            Get quiet. Be honest. Think big.

            What would you like your career, your relationships, your health, your finances, and your spiritual life to be like? Jot down enough details so that your wishes seem tangible to you. Then, look at this list every morning before you start your day and every night before you go to sleep.

            Sounds silly? It’s not. It works! Permitting yourself to daydream about a rich and fulfilling life is the first step to manifesting it.

            8. Take Breaks to Get Clues About Your Ideal Future

            Did you know that working straight through to a deadline leads to diminishing returns? Research shows that taking a break for 15 minutes every 75 to 90 minutes can help you recharge, refresh your focus, and get more done in less time.[5]

            Wait, it gets better! A Stanford study shows that walking increases your creative output increases by 60 percent. Doing repetitive activities such as walking, running, riding your bike, swimming, and sweeping allow solutions to problems to pop into your mind out of nowhere.[6]

            What does this success principle have to do with creating your dream life?

            These mini-breaks allow you to get vital clues for what to do next to attain your ideal future. Plus, you won’t waste precious time and energy getting lost in other people’s agendas.

            9. Take Action on Your Inspired Ideas

            Once an inspired thought pops into your mind, take action.

            This is one of the most powerful success principles for turning your dreams into reality; the sooner the better. Whatever it is—from calling an old friend to taking a new route home—be sure to do it!

            Pay attention to your oddball hunches. You need to go after what you want, not just dream about it. As comedian Jim Carrey warns,

            Advertising

            “You can’t just visualize and go eat a sandwich.”

            10. Count Your Rockstar Moments

            Still not sure you have what it takes to get your dream life? This final success principle is guaranteed to help.

            Make a list of everything you’ve ever accomplished. As you read back through it, put a star next to each item, and let it sink in.

            You’ll be pleasantly surprised by how good you’ll feel about yourself afterward. You’ll also see how effective you’ve been in the past at getting what you want. You’ve succeeded before, you can succeed again.

            You already rock. You just need to own it. Trust me, you’ve got this!

            Final Thoughts

            Eleanor Roosevelt said,

            “The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.”

            Following these success principles will help you find the time and energy to do the things that really matter and live with clear intention.

            By spending just one hour a week doing something you love, focusing on your strengths and achievements, embracing what makes you different, and acting on inspired ideas, you can create a life that is a perfect fit for you, step-by-step.

            If you don’t have a clue about what your dream life could look like yet, don’t worry. Your heart knows. It has been “talking” to you for a long time. It’s just being muffled by KCRP, buried under a lot of “shoulds” and fear.

            This article can also help you figure out the life you truly want to live: How to Get Motivated and Be Happy Every Day When You Wake Up.

            Stand still, get quiet, and listen. It’s constantly telling you what you need to do to realize your own rockstar potential. It may be just a whisper now, but the more you pay attention to it, the louder it will get, and the easier it will be to follow.

            More About Success in Life

            Featured photo credit: Rahul Dey via unsplash.com

            Reference

            Read Next