Advertising
Advertising

Award winning Cheatsheet to turn your life around. Try these amazing steps today.

Award winning Cheatsheet to turn your life around. Try these amazing steps today.

Are you waking up unhappy or slipping away into the drenching array of negativity with questions like:

Why am I not successful?

What am I going to do? All my friends have figured things out, but not me.

I don’t want to go to college, but how will I survive?

Why can’t I just get a grand idea and make the world change for the better?

I try so hard, but why can’t I get the results?

Advertising

You are definitely not alone. I had these same questions until I realized that I had gone through enough and put the most life challenging parts of my story into a book. After I dreaded the process for 3 whole years just to help people, I realized that I’m pretty successful. I’m a 23 year old author now. Doesn’t that just sound amazing to you? I see my name on Amazon and it gives me chills that I had completed that one thing.

The question I ask myself now is that if I backtracked to 6 years ago, would I read a book to change my life? I probably wouldn’t. A cheatsheet of the book would have been better. Lucky for you, I have put together one, simplifying the tips on how to change your life from absolute chaos to freedom. I’ve called my concept THE BREADCRUMB BALANCE.

Your first step to moving forward is to give things a chance. Remember that quote? To have a different outcome, you have to start doing things differently. Focusing on the lifestyle will lead you to the life.

The Breadcrumb Balance PART 1
This is vital for growth in any aspect of life.

So… maybe you like bread or maybe you don’t. Luckily, for you, this really isn’t about either one. Have you ever seen how a solid loaf of bread looks? What am I asking? Of course you have! It’s firm, yet soft. It leaves some crumbs if not consumed or fully used up. The breadcrumb is useful for other things. Don’t trash it just yet.

Okay, but what does this have to do with me or growth?

Maybe you aren’t where you want to be in life since you’re reading this, but just like the breadcrumb, don’t trash your life. I was once in a dark place too. I was frustrated and annoyed by everything just because I wasn’t where I wanted to be. I wasn’t accepted by society or even my family because of things I felt and chose. I was attracted to women and that could have gotten me killed where I was from. I was also doing drugs, clubbing all night, then going to school drunk in the morning. Deep down, all I wanted was to have a decent life and make myself proud, but i didn’t know what to do or how to get there. I was the underdog, the black sheep, the I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH MYSELF person. The only thing is I was good at was hiding it.

Advertising

What got me to safer, more stable grounds?
The Breadcrumb Balance.

So, to answer your question: WHAT THE HECK IS THE BREADCRUMB BALANCE?

The breadcrumb balance is using the portion or section of anything that is deemed as unimportant or useless to build on the task at hand and get the results you want. That’s Part 1 of 2, but let part 1 sink in first.

The breadcrumb is useless after you have used the bread until the lightbulb goes off. You realize that breadcrumbs can be used to prepare baked chicken, bake a cake, or make delicious appetizers like croutons. Better yet, the birds can live off of it too. Why throw it out when you can improve the cycle of life? In a nutshell, it’s just taking what’s useless and making it good again. Faith is Key.

How do I put the Breadcrumb Balance into action?

HEALTH, WEALTH, LOVE, AND HAPPINESS —>> THE GOOD LIFE

STEPS

  1. Make a decision. What do I really want? A main objective is needed. You don’t need to throw in the towel just yet and say I haven’t figured out my life fully so I can’t use the Breadcrumb Balance. No! It’s a must that you accept that you need change in your life. Sorry, I didn’t mean to yell at you there, but you must know that growth is necessary and you must be willing to keep moving until you get to that point. Accepting that you haven’t got it all figured out isn’t enough. There has to be a sacrifice to give up the lazy and lackadaisical life you’re living now. There has to be a second stage that you hit to move from where you are. You don’t know what to do? Fine, but what will move you closer to success, happiness, or preferably both? What are some things you’d like to do before you kick the bucket?
  2. Set goals. After you have accepted and decided that change is necessary, you must write down all the things you wish to accomplish and by what date. This is completely necessary. I used this strategy to move from Jamaica to America, lose 60 pounds, and write a book on how my life changed immensely in all ways. That said, growth is not subject to one aspect of life. Make sure to write a list of short-term goals that lead to your long-term vision. Keep it as simple as possible. Flooding yourself with goals for timelines that are unrealistic is equivalent to a slow death. Be reasonable with yourself while challenging your abilities. Balance is everything for this step. One thing at a time. Don’t overthink yourself to death. If you need help or you get stuck, just message me. I’ll help you.
  3. Condition your mind. This is the most important part to me. Making yourself more aware is one of the most life changing investments one could possibly make. Do whatever it takes to make yourself believe and know that what you want is possible. I used vision boards, gratitude walks, prayer, reading the bible, and motivation videos on YouTube to keep me grounded for change. These helped me understand faith a bit more too. Our belief systems may differ, so you are free to use whatever you wish to enhance and enlighten your own path. I also made my goals repetitive in my mind, telling myself throughout the day that I am now living my dreams. Along with repeating this, I began to visualize what it would be like if I was really living my dreams. I began to picture what I would wear, how I’d smell, speak, and the people I’d meet. Nothing was left out. The more you visualize, the more you’ll feel like it is true. The more you can feel it is, the closer you’ll become to manifesting the opportunities you wish to accomplish. Always remember: searching for gold will lead you to gold. This is Faith.
  4. Activating goals. Take action! It’s no doubt that if you follow these steps you will be on your own way to achieving. However, you cannot move forward without wanting to physically move. Sounds dumb right? Then again, how can you get out of bed if you don’t actually make an effort to move? That’s crazy! It’s just the same as the law of motion (unless movement is applied to an object, it will stay the same). Treat your goals like these objects; unless you take action, no growth will take place. You don’t need to kill yourself off to gain traction, but a little effort is all it takes. When you begin to fall in love with your results, try to do 1% more than the day before. Just 1%. I began to write, exercise, and pack my suitcase everyday. I always knew I wanted to write, travel, and lose weight, but it didn’t seem like a legitimate thing to do. I loved expressing myself. Now. I’m an actual author with my in depth story on Amazon, 60 pounds lighter, and in a new country. It’s unbelievable! I never knew I had it in me to do all these things because of how inconsistent I always was, but a little effort everyday with the other steps made it possible. The minute you begin to apply movement to your life is the moment you’ll begin to see results. Stop feeling like a victim. You’re not. No one is better than you, either. The quality of your thoughts will impact the quality of your actions, so develop tiny movements every day that will lead you closer.
  5. Trust your journey. I always knew that the challenges I faced were for a specific reason. I didn’t always have it figured out and I surely didn’t know what I’d become. I was a college dropout and living the life of God knows what. No one expected the things I was doing. I was never a straight A student because I wasn’t the type to go out of my way for that. I was smart, but I didn’t always make smart decisions. I’m guessing you’re similar to who I thought I was, but listen, it’s all a piece of the puzzle. Look at me now, at age 23 I’m giving life lessons. I became a mentor for kids before I moved and I’ve helped them develop their mindsets from “0-100 Real quick”, as Drake said. Worrying is good sometimes, but not to the point where you suffer. Worry in such a way that you become focused on fixing the root of the issue. Notice I didn’t say fix the issue? Fix the ROOT of the issue, which is your mind, your perspective, and how you view things. Life is much more than we often think. No one can help you unless you decide to fix the root of the issue. Trust your journey. Life isn’t out to get you – it’s reacting to you. You must learn to adapt because if you don’t, you will not move forward. You will stick to that same old negative thinking and not push yourself. Instead of giving up, be open-minded to adaptation.

If you know the things that will help you get to a certain goal, but you hate the process so much that it demotivates you, get a creative alternative. I hated reading books, but I knew I needed to get the information someway somehow.

Advertising

What did I do?

I began listening to audiobooks and made my own notes. I even downloaded a few podcasts and followed cool people on social media. Follow the ones you can emulate even if they don’t necessarily have the same belief system as you. Use them as a mentor because they have the strategies you desire. DJ Khaled is one of these people I use. This guy is the king of Snapchat. He has surface madness, but if you analyze what he says and does on a spiritual level, the guy is straight up dope. Tai Lopez is one I couldn’t stand, but I gave him a chance and now I don’t go a day without keeping up with his snaps. It’s really good to find what works for you and just keep working at it.

It takes 30 days to build a habit.
Challenge yourself and follow these steps for 70 days.

Be humble. This means try to be more aware of things you don’t know. Be open to learning. Instead of saying, “I already know this”, ask “what more should I know about this?”

Challenge who you are. Never stop being curious and try to be better than you were yesterday (or even a couple hours ago). We were conditioned and wired to buy things even if we don’t need it. It’s a consumer’s world, but is it worth it to conform to that? Train yourself in such a way that you listen to your body and the goals you have to know what you deserve. When you see that you deserve something, you don’t care about greatness because you don’t need greatness. Yes, it’s unconventional, but you really don’t need greatness. All you need is a pain point. Unhappiness is a pain point to show that you need to work on your happiness. Discomfort in the stomach shows you need to eat better. See where this is going? Michael Jordan was conceited, but his coach always loved his ability to be coached. That is true humility. Live to learn. If you want to grow, the more you learn is the more you earn in any aspect.

Try to find the good even on your bad days. You will have bad days, but try your best to have the greatest bad day of all time. Crawl if you have to in order to get things done. Life isn’t waiting for you, so don’t wait for it.

If you want to die with regrets then you’re just a loser. If you want to live a full life but don’t know how to get there, remember you have potential and you work on yourself. I absolutely adore you if you’re willing to try.

Motivation is needed, but some days you won’t be motivated and that’s fine. Yes, I said it’s fine. Not everything you do will be an amazing adventure, it will be drawn out and annoying, but push through it and you’ll be amazed by your results.

Advertising

Never give up. If you give up and stay that way, you’re a loser; however, if you have given up and continued after, then I’m still adoring you. Don’t be a loser. Give your life a shot. It’s worth it. If I had given up, I’d be a loser, but here I am today after attempting suicide and going through the motions of life.

Don’t be afraid to shoot me an email to update me on your progress.

You’re worth it. I love you. Keep trying.

Featured photo credit: Bessi/pixabay.com via pixabay.com

More by this author

5 Common Mistakes People Make in Staying Motivated It Can Be Painful But You’ll Learn The Most By Failing How to Get Over Family Feuds that lead to Stress, Anxiety and Depression Award winning Cheatsheet to turn your life around. Try these amazing steps today. Amazing Benefits of Aloe Vera (+5 Beauty Recipes)

Trending in 20-Something

1 One Solid Practice for Tackling Low Self-Esteem 2 7 Tools to Optimize Your Next Long-Term Traveling Experience 3 How To Go Through College And Stay Sane 4 The Battle Of The Voices In My Head 5 How to Have the Best Spring With Your Pets

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on October 17, 2019

How to Spend More Quality Time with Your Partner

How to Spend More Quality Time with Your Partner

You see your partner every single day. They are the first person you talk to in the morning and the last person you kiss goodnight.

But does seeing each other day in and day out equal a healthy relationship? Not necessarily.

Spending quality time with your partner is the best way to ensure your relationship stays healthy and strong. This means going above and beyond sitting together while you watch Netflix or going out for the occasional dinner. You deserve more from your relationship – and so does your spouse!

What does quality time mean? It means spending time with your spouse without interruption. It’s a chance for you to come together and talk. Communication will build emotional intimacy and trust.

Quality time is also about expressing love in a physical way. Not sex, necessarily (but that’s great, too!) but through hand-holding, cuddling, caressing, and tickling. Studies show that these displays of affection will boost partner satisfaction.[1]

So how do you spend quality time with your partner? Here are 13 relationship tips on making the most out of your time with your partner.

Advertising

1. Recognize the Signs

If you want a healthy relationship, you have to learn how to recognize the signs that you need to spend more quality time together.

Some telltale signs include:

  • You’re always on your phones.
  • You value friendships or hobbies over quality time with your spouse.
  • You aren’t together during important events.
  • You are arguing more often or lack connection.
  • You don’t make plans or date nights.
  • You’re not happy.

If you are experiencing any of these relationship symptoms, know that quality time together can reverse the negative effects of the signs above.

2. Try New Things Together

Have you ever wanted to learn how to play an instrument or speak another language? How about skydive or ballroom dance?

Instead of viewing these as solo hobbies and interests, why not involve your partner?

Trying new activities together builds healthy relationships because it encourages spouses to rely on one another for emotional and physical support.

Advertising

Shared hobbies also promote marital friendship, and the Journal of Happiness Studies found that marital satisfaction was twice as high for couples who viewed each other as best friends.[2]

3. Schedule in Tech-Free Time

Your phone is a great way to listen to music, watch videos, and keep up-to-date with friends and family. But is your phone good for your relationship?

Many couples phone snub, or ‘phub’, one another. Studies show that phubbing can lower relationship satisfaction and increase one’s chances of depression.[3]

Reduce those chances by removing distractions when spending quality time together and showing your partner they have your full attention.

4. Hit the Gym as a Couple

One way you can spend more time together as a couple is by becoming workout partners. Studies show that couples are more likely to stay with their exercise routine if they work out together.[4] Couples also work out harder than they would solo. One study found that 95 percent of couples who work out together maintained weight loss compares to the 66 percent of singles who did.[5]

Join a gym, do at-home couples’ workouts, try couples yoga, hit the hiking trails, or get your bikes out. No matter which way you choose to exercise, these healthy activities can promote a healthy relationship.

Advertising

5. Cook Meals Together

Pop open a bottle of wine or put some romantic music on while you get busy – in the kitchen, of course!

One of the best relationship tips for spending quality time together when you both have busy schedules is to cook meals together.[6]

Spice things up and try and prepare a four-course meal or a fancy French dish together. Not only is this a fun way to spend your time together, but it also promotes teamwork.

If all goes well, you’ll have a romantic date night meal at home that you prepared with your four hands. And if the food didn’t turn out the way you’d hoped, you are guaranteed to have a laugh and create new memories together.

6. Have a Regular Date Night

Couples experience a greater sense of happiness and less stress when they are spending quality time together.[7] One of the biggest relationship tips for a healthy partnership is to include a date night in your weekly routine.

The National Marriage Project found that having a weekly date night can make your relationship seem more exciting and helps prevent relationship boredom.[8] It also lowers the probability of divorce, improves your sex life, and increases healthy communication.

Advertising

Some great ideas for what to do on your date night include:

  • Have a movie marathon – Gather up your favorite flicks and cuddle up on the couch.
  • Play games together – Cards, board games, video games, and other creative outlets are a fun way to spend quality time together.
  • Recreate your first date – Go back to that restaurant and order the same meal you did when you first got together. You can spice up your evening by pretending you’re strangers meeting for the first time and see how sexy the night gets.
  • Plan a weekend getaway – There’s nothing better than traveling with the one you love.
  • Dinner and a movie – A classic!
  • Try a new restaurant – Make it your mission to rate and try all of the Mexican restaurants/Irish pubs/Italian trattorias in your area.
  • Have a long sex session – Intimacy promotes the release of the oxytocin hormone which is responsible for a myriad of great feelings.[9]

Here’re even more date night ideas for your reference: 50 Unique and Really Fun Date Ideas for Couples

Final Thoughts

The benefits of spending quality time together are endless. Here are just some of the ways it can contribute to a healthy relationship:

  • Improves emotional and physical intimacy
  • Lowers divorce rates
  • Improves communication
  • Reduces marital boredom
  • Bonds couples closer
  • Improves friendship
  • Boosts health
  • Reduces stress

These are all excellent reasons to start making date night a regular part of your week.

It’s easy to have a healthy relationship when you set aside dedicated time to share with your spouse. Try new things together, make your spouse your workout buddy, and look for innovative ways to be close and connected.

These relationship tips will bring great benefits to your marriage.

Featured photo credit: Allen Taylor via unsplash.com

Reference

Read Next