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8 Highly Attractive Things In Women (That Have Nothing to Do With Appearance)

8 Highly Attractive Things In Women (That Have Nothing to Do With Appearance)

I’ve been helping men improve their love lives for years now. I’ve probably read dozens of articles on what women find attractive in men. I’ve even written a few of them. The funny thing is, I rarely come across articles that touch on what men find attractive in a woman. Is the modern dating game so lopsided that it’s enough for a woman to just ‘show up’, or do we men stumble merely at the sight of a nice head of hair and a shapely body?

I won’t deny the fact that this is true for a lot of men out there, but there’s a little more needed to really attract a man who isn’t impressed with mere ‘good looks’?

Now, I can’t speak for the entire population here, but here are eight things that I, personally, find incredibly attractive in a woman.

1. Kindness

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    This might sound like a bit of a cliché, but true kindness really is rare these days. Sure, you get people who are nice to those who hold some sort of value to them, but how many people do you meet every day that would go and talk to the lone stranger crying in the subway? I don’t want to be with a person that’s just nice to me, my friends, and my family. I want a person who can brighten up my day by brightening up the lives of everyone she comes in contact with.

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    You have a power to lighten someone’s day just by smiling to them. It’s worth using it often, also to become more attractive in men’s eyes. Studies from the University of British Columbia show that men are attracted to smiling women. A natural smile conveys messages like optimism and stability, which are definitely qualities desired in a mate.

    2. Positivity and sense of humor

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      “It’s not selfish to love yourself, take care of yourself, and to make your happiness a priority.”

      One of the most important things in any relationship, romantic or otherwise, is the ability to have a great time and have a good laugh. Taking care of your emotional hygiene and good mood should be your priority. Only then you can take life positive, light, and with a fair dose of humor. While I never hold any significant other to a comic standard of say, Ellen Degeneres, I do love a woman who can live life one day at a time, take a joke, and crack a few of her own.

      3. Passion

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        This might sound like a tall ask to some, but I’m a person who needs to be inspired constantly to be happy. To me, there’s no feeling in this world as attractive as being inspired by a woman who’s passionate about her pursuits in life.

        You could be a world class pianist or you could be doctor, the minute I see your eyes light up while talking about what you want to achieve in life, I guarantee you I’ll be falling hard and fast. You cannot get bored together, because there is always a topic to talk about with a girl who is passionate about something.

        4. Getting along with my friends

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          A friend once told me an old Chinese saying of a man that has a wife who gets along with his friends will have a long and pleasant life. Well, I have a feeling that my friend might be lying about there being an actual saying; however, I have to say that it really is a beautiful thing to be with a woman who can get along with your buddies and just be ‘one of the guys’ when she wants to.

          5. Confidence

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            “Nothing is more beautiful than a confident woman who doesn’t pretend to be someone she’s not.”

            I don’t know about you, but I like being around people who are happy to be themselves. You see, it’s not just women who respond powerfully to a confident partner, I love being with a woman who stands up for herself and what she believes in; as long as it’s not an opinion against my sports team or favorite band. Ha! Just kidding. I would never date a girl who didn’t love Iron Maiden.

            6. Being comfortable with her sexuality

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              There’s a lot to be said on what’s sexy and, more specifically, on what makes a woman sexy. To me, what matters is not what a girl wears beneath the sheets or what she’s into, it’s the fact that she’s comfortable with her own sexuality and aware of her sexual energy. Romance is just so much more fun with a woman who knows what she’s into and isn’t abashed about it.

              Your sexuality is a big part of your human nature. The sooner you embrace this side, the better and more attractive partner you become.

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              7. Decisiveness

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                “A girl should be two things: who & what she wants.”

                One of my biggest pet peeves is people who don’t know what they want and can’t take responsibility for their own decisions. At the end of the day, I’m willing to battle through a few arguments on where we should have dinner or which movie we should watch, as long as I know that I’m with a person who’s strong enough to be decisive.

                8. She has her own sense of style

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                  Here’s the thing: we men are very much visual creatures. It’s just how we’re evolutionary programmed. Something that I absolutely love in a woman is a unique sense of style. I’ll admit that I tend to gravitate towards certain stereotypes – bohemian Goth with a fair share of body ink (in case you’re wondering). I fall in love whenever I see a woman who has a sense of style that I don’t get to see on every street corner.

                  photo credit: Pinterest

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                  Last Updated on March 25, 2020

                  How to Crush Your Lack of Motivation and Always Stay Motivated

                  How to Crush Your Lack of Motivation and Always Stay Motivated

                  How many times have you not achieved your goals and let yourself down due to your lack of motivation? When you’re not wallowing in sadness and self-pity, you are too busy procrastinating till you can’t anymore and before you know it, you are part of vicious cycle of anxiety and stress.

                  Whether it’s losing weight or bringing your business to fruition – motivation is essential for growth and success in every sphere of our lives.

                  That said, it is not easy staying motivated. In order to constantly stay motivated, you need to take ownership of your life and consciously make efforts in that direction.

                  Well, it’s never too late to take matters in your hands and change the course of your life. Here are 11 effective ways to crush your lack of motivation and always stay motivated:

                  1. Write Your Goals

                  The power of writing goals down has always been underestimated. Why write when you can remember, right? Wrong.

                  Our thoughts are all over the place and the first step to achieve your goals is to organize your thoughts. So, write your goals down, however big or small they might be. Make them as specific as possible and assign deadlines to each of them.

                  As you write them down and revisit them regularly, they get further drilled in your head, taking you closer to your goals. Doing this small exercise helps you to remain focused, motivated and lets you track your progress with ease.

                  Start today – take to your laptop or a diary and get down to writing what you wish to achieve in life.

                  2. Beat Procrastination

                  Your lack of motivation and procrastination go hand in hand. Every time you procrastinate, your motivation levels take a greater hit. The only way to bring an end to this loop is to stop procrastinating.

                  Next time you find yourself putting off something for ‘later’, stop and assess the reasons behind it. Get to the root of the cause and eliminate it in order to overcome this poor habit of procrastinating which is sabotaging your life and mental health.

                  Take a look at this guide and learn how to beat procrastination:

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                  What Is Procrastination (And the Complete Guide to Stop Procrastinating)

                  When you finally overcome procrastination, you will realize the positive impact it has on your mood and motivation levels.

                  3. Celebrate Small Wins

                  In the quest to achieve the bigger goals in life, we often forget to celebrate the smaller wins along the way. An achievement is an achievement – be it big or small, it deserves to be acknowledged and celebrated.

                  Finished a project on time? Reward yourself. Managed to run on the treadmill for a good one hour? Pat yourself on the back. Found time to meditate? Celebrate it.

                  It is these small achievements that reinstate that we are on the right path and take us one step closer to the bigger goals.

                  So, get into the habit of recognizing and appreciating small wins. You will be surprised to see how this practice helps you stay motivated.

                  4. Practice Gratitude

                  It’s easier to whine about what we don’t have rather than counting our blessings. Isn’t it?

                  Making gratefulness a part of your life is a very important step to retain high motivational levels. It revitalizes our spirits and renews our enthusiasm for life.

                  So, how do you practice gratitude? For starters, keep a gratitude journal to jot down what you are grateful for, express your gratitude to people you love and spread positivity wherever you go. If you need some inspiration to be thankful for, here it is:

                  60 Things To Be Thankful For In Life

                  By doing so, you begin to focus more on what you have rather than what you don’t and that is a great start to stay motivated.

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                  5. Be Optimistic

                  Life is not always hunky dory. There will be bad days when things aren’t going in your favor, when you feel lost and all you want to do is give up.

                  At such times, instead of letting negativity take over your life, adopt an optimistic approach to life. Quit overthinking, ask the right questions and focus on finding solutions.

                  Yes, there will be hurdles along the way but if you hang on to positive affirmations and hopes, the journey will be a lot smoother. So, with every passing day, sow the seeds of positivity and you are sure to build a positive environment around you.

                  6. Don’t Dwell on the Past

                  A lot of times, our lack of motivation stems from the habit of dwelling on the past. This gives rise to fear and regrets, preventing us from making progress in the present day.

                  Dwelling on the past is nothing but a waste of time. Understand that the past is long gone, and you cannot do anything to change that.

                  What you can do is make your present day worthwhile. Instead of looking back and having regrets, learn from your mistakes, forgive yourself and move on.

                  So, the next time you find your mind wandering off to the past, be determined to change the way you think and consciously concentrate on living in the present. This guide can help you:

                  10 Simple Steps To Let Go Of The Past

                  7. Face your Fears

                  You can never find motivation where there is fear. Identify the fear that is pulling you back and tackle it.

                  If you don’t face your fear head on, you cannot expect to conquer it and renew your motivation.

                  Ask yourself: What is stopping you? What are you scared of?

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                  Once you accept your fear, you can work on an action plan and think of solutions to overcome it. This article will give you some effective tips on conquering your fears:

                  How to Overcome Your Irrational Fears (That Stop You from Succeeding)

                  Seek external help if required but don’t choose to turn a blind eye over your fears – it will only aggravate matters.

                  8. Visualize your Success

                  You must have heard the famous quote, ‘see it to believe it’. That is exactly what visualization is about.

                  One of the most effective self-motivation techniques, visualizing the process to your desired outcome helps you move in a positive direction and achieve your goal.

                  Close your eyes and focus all your energies on the minutest of details that will take you where you want to reach. Doing this exercise everyday inspires you to keep going and not lose hope. The vision of attaining success will drive you to do better while instilling belief and confidence.

                  9. Find Inspiration

                  Can’t seem to find inspiration inwards? Don’t panic. There are plenty of external sources to gain inspiration from.

                  From motivational books and quotes to speeches, films and apps – it is a good idea to take help from motivational material to rekindle your spirits and regain your motivation.

                  Everyone is wired differently. For instance, a self-help book might work for your friend, but it might do nothing to move you. So, find what inspires you and turn to it when you are in desperate need for motivation.

                  Finding inspiration externally fills you with hope and sometimes that is all you need.

                  10. Enjoy Downtime

                  You are clearly exhausted with all the running you’re doing in life. So much, that you don’t even have time to stop and think what’s causing you so much unhappiness. All you know is that you are lacking motivation and everyday seems to have become a struggle.

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                  Now, that’s certainly not how you should live the rest of your life.

                  You need to schedule downtime for yourself, relax and give your mind and body some rest. Take a vacation, indulge in hobbies, meet some friends, put your hair down and stop with all the overthinking. It is important to do things that make you happy in order to think clearly and stay motivated.

                  11. Meditate Regularly

                  Meditation lets you take control of your mind. It improves focus and concentration while helping you relax.

                  Whenever you have had a tough day or find your thoughts going places, the best way to calm yourself down is by closing your eyes and meditating. It helps you to remove all the unnecessary frills in life and keeps you on the right track.

                  Include meditation in your daily schedule and you are sure to see an improvement in your productivity and motivation.

                  The Bottom Line

                  Practicing these simple exercises isn’t the tough part, what’s tough is religiously doing them every day.

                  However, don’t expect to get rid of your lack of motivation overnight. There will still be days when you will be low on energy but by making these conscious efforts to stay motivated, you are sure to see a vast change in your perspective and your response to bad days.

                  So, start today and be committed to making a positive change in your life.

                  More Tips About Staying Motivated

                  Featured photo credit: Sonnie Hiles via unsplash.com

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