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8 Highly Attractive Things In Women (That Have Nothing to Do With Appearance)

8 Highly Attractive Things In Women (That Have Nothing to Do With Appearance)

I’ve been helping men improve their love lives for years now. I’ve probably read dozens of articles on what women find attractive in men. I’ve even written a few of them. The funny thing is, I rarely come across articles that touch on what men find attractive in a woman. Is the modern dating game so lopsided that it’s enough for a woman to just ‘show up’, or do we men stumble merely at the sight of a nice head of hair and a shapely body?

I won’t deny the fact that this is true for a lot of men out there, but there’s a little more needed to really attract a man who isn’t impressed with mere ‘good looks’?

Now, I can’t speak for the entire population here, but here are eight things that I, personally, find incredibly attractive in a woman.

1. Kindness

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    This might sound like a bit of a cliché, but true kindness really is rare these days. Sure, you get people who are nice to those who hold some sort of value to them, but how many people do you meet every day that would go and talk to the lone stranger crying in the subway? I don’t want to be with a person that’s just nice to me, my friends, and my family. I want a person who can brighten up my day by brightening up the lives of everyone she comes in contact with.

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    You have a power to lighten someone’s day just by smiling to them. It’s worth using it often, also to become more attractive in men’s eyes. Studies from the University of British Columbia show that men are attracted to smiling women. A natural smile conveys messages like optimism and stability, which are definitely qualities desired in a mate.

    2. Positivity and sense of humor

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      “It’s not selfish to love yourself, take care of yourself, and to make your happiness a priority.”

      One of the most important things in any relationship, romantic or otherwise, is the ability to have a great time and have a good laugh. Taking care of your emotional hygiene and good mood should be your priority. Only then you can take life positive, light, and with a fair dose of humor. While I never hold any significant other to a comic standard of say, Ellen Degeneres, I do love a woman who can live life one day at a time, take a joke, and crack a few of her own.

      3. Passion

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        This might sound like a tall ask to some, but I’m a person who needs to be inspired constantly to be happy. To me, there’s no feeling in this world as attractive as being inspired by a woman who’s passionate about her pursuits in life.

        You could be a world class pianist or you could be doctor, the minute I see your eyes light up while talking about what you want to achieve in life, I guarantee you I’ll be falling hard and fast. You cannot get bored together, because there is always a topic to talk about with a girl who is passionate about something.

        4. Getting along with my friends

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          A friend once told me an old Chinese saying of a man that has a wife who gets along with his friends will have a long and pleasant life. Well, I have a feeling that my friend might be lying about there being an actual saying; however, I have to say that it really is a beautiful thing to be with a woman who can get along with your buddies and just be ‘one of the guys’ when she wants to.

          5. Confidence

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            “Nothing is more beautiful than a confident woman who doesn’t pretend to be someone she’s not.”

            I don’t know about you, but I like being around people who are happy to be themselves. You see, it’s not just women who respond powerfully to a confident partner, I love being with a woman who stands up for herself and what she believes in; as long as it’s not an opinion against my sports team or favorite band. Ha! Just kidding. I would never date a girl who didn’t love Iron Maiden.

            6. Being comfortable with her sexuality

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              There’s a lot to be said on what’s sexy and, more specifically, on what makes a woman sexy. To me, what matters is not what a girl wears beneath the sheets or what she’s into, it’s the fact that she’s comfortable with her own sexuality and aware of her sexual energy. Romance is just so much more fun with a woman who knows what she’s into and isn’t abashed about it.

              Your sexuality is a big part of your human nature. The sooner you embrace this side, the better and more attractive partner you become.

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              7. Decisiveness

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                “A girl should be two things: who & what she wants.”

                One of my biggest pet peeves is people who don’t know what they want and can’t take responsibility for their own decisions. At the end of the day, I’m willing to battle through a few arguments on where we should have dinner or which movie we should watch, as long as I know that I’m with a person who’s strong enough to be decisive.

                8. She has her own sense of style

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                  Here’s the thing: we men are very much visual creatures. It’s just how we’re evolutionary programmed. Something that I absolutely love in a woman is a unique sense of style. I’ll admit that I tend to gravitate towards certain stereotypes – bohemian Goth with a fair share of body ink (in case you’re wondering). I fall in love whenever I see a woman who has a sense of style that I don’t get to see on every street corner.

                  photo credit: Pinterest

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                  Last Updated on August 7, 2018

                  10 Famous Failures to Success Stories That Will Inspire You to Carry On

                  10 Famous Failures to Success Stories That Will Inspire You to Carry On

                  Failure occurs everyday, in school, jobs, housework, and within families. It is unavoidable, irritating and causes pessimism.

                  While the thought of flinging your hands in the air and walking away is all too appealing, take a second to connect with the people who have been there and survived.

                  Here are 10 famous failures to success stories around the world that will inspire you to keep going and achieve greatness:

                  1. J.K. Rowling

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                    During a Harvard commencement speech, Harry Potter author J.K. Rowling outlined the importance and value of failure.[1]

                    Why? Simply because she was once a failure too.

                    A few short years after her graduation from college, her worst nightmares were realized. In her words,

                    “I had failed on an epic scale. An exceptionally short-lived marriage had imploded, and I was jobless, a lone parent, and as poor as it is possible to be in modern Britain, without being homeless. The fears that my parents had had for me, and that I had had for myself, had both come to pass, and by every usual standard, I was the biggest failure I knew.”

                    Coming out of this failure stronger and more determined was the key to her success.

                    2. Steve Jobs

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                      The now revolutionary Apple started off with two men in a garage. Years later we all know it as a $2 billion company with over 4000 employees.

                      Yet, almost unbelievably, Steve Jobs was fired from the very company he began.

                      The dismissal made him realize that his passion for his work exceeded the disappointment of failure. Further ventures such as NeXT and Pixar eventually led Jobs back to the CEO position at AppleJobs said in 2005:

                      “I didn’t see it then, but it turned out that getting fired from Apple was the best thing that could have ever happened to me.”

                      Lost your job today? Keep kicking and you could be just like this guy!

                      3. Bill Gates
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                        Bill Gates was a Harvard dropout. He co-owned a business called Traf-O-Data, which was a true failure.[2]

                        However, skill and a passion for computer programming turned this failure into the pioneer of famous software company Microsoft, and the then 31-year-old into the world’s youngest self-made billionaire.

                        In his own words:

                        “It’s fine to celebrate success but it is more important to heed the lessons of failure.”

                        This isn’t to say that dropping out of Harvard will make you into a billionaire, but maybe that shiny degree isn’t worth as much as the drive and passion to succeed.

                        4. Albert Einstein
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                          The word ‘Einstein’ is associated with intelligence and synonymous with genius. Yet it is a famous fact that the pioneer of the theory of general relativity, Albert Einstein himself, could not speak fluently until the age of nine. His rebellious nature led to expulsion from school, and he was refused admittance to the Zurich Polytechnic School.

                          His earlier setbacks did not stop him from winning the Nobel Prize in Physics in 1921. After all, he believed that:

                          “Success is failure in progress.”

                          To this day, his research has influenced various aspects of life including culture, religion, art, and even late night TV.

                          Just because you haven’t achieved anything great yet, doesn’t mean you can’t be an Einstein yourself.

                          5. Abraham Lincoln

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                            Failing in business in 1831, suffering a nervous breakdown in 1836, defeated in his run for president in 1856, Abraham Lincoln was no stranger to rejection and failure. Rather than taking these signs as a motivation for surrender, he refused to stop trying his best.

                            In this great man’s words:

                            “My great concern is not whether you have failed, but whether you are content with your failure.”

                            Lincoln was elected in 1861 as the 16th President of the United States of America.

                            The amount of rejection you receive is not a defining factor. Success is still within your reach.

                            6. Michael Jordan

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                              “I’ve missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.”

                              This quote by retired basketball legend Michael Jordan in a Nike advertisement speaks for itself.

                              It would be an easy misconception that Jordan’s basketball skills revolve around natural talent. In fact, in his earlier years,  basketball coaches had trouble looking past the fact that Jordan didn’t reach the minimum height. It was years of effort, practice, and failure that made the star we know today.

                              7. Steven Spielberg

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                                Regarded as one of the most influential filmmakers of all time, Steven Spielberg is a familiar household name. It is surprising to realize therefore that the genius behind Jaws and E.T. had poor grades in high school, getting him rejected from the University of Southern California three times.

                                While he was in college, he caught the eye of executives at Universal, who signed him as a television director in 1969. This meant that he would not finish his college degree for another 33 years.

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                                Perseverance and acceptance of failure is the key to success, after all.

                                “Even though I get older, what I do never gets old, and that’s what I think keeps me hungry.”

                                Bad grades in high school aside, there is no questioning the genius involved.

                                To date, Spielberg has directed 51 films and has been awarded three Oscars.

                                8. Walt Disney

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                                  Mickey Mouse creator Walt Disney dropped out of school at a young age in a failed attempt at joining the army.[3] One of his earlier ventures, Laugh-o-Gram Studios, went bankrupt due to his lack of ability to run a successful business. He was once fired from a Missouri newspaper for “not being creative enough.”

                                  Yet today, The genius behind Disney studios is responsible for generations of childhood memories and dreams. From Snow White to Frozen, Disney will continue to entertain the world for generations to come.

                                  The logic behind this is simple:

                                  “We don’t look backwards for very long. We keep moving forward, opening up new doors, and doing new things, because we’re curious… and curiosity keeps leading us down new paths.”

                                  9. Vincent Van Gogh
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                                    During his lifetime, Vincent Van Gogh suffered mental illness, failed relationships, and committed suicide at the age of 37.

                                    He only ever sold one painting in his life, pinning him a failure as an artist. However that did not put a damper on his enthusiasm and passion for art.

                                    He would never know that years and years after his death he would become known as a key figure in the world of post-impressionism, and ultimately, one of the greatest artist that ever lived.

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                                    He would never know that he became a hot topic in art classes and his image was going to be used in TV, books and other forms of popular culture.

                                    In the words of this great, but tragic man:

                                    “If you hear a voice within you say ‘you cannot paint,’ then by all means paint, and that voice will be silenced.”

                                    10. Stephen King

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                                      As a paranoid, troubled child, tormented by nightmares and raised in poverty, it is no surprise that Stephen King grew up to the title: “Master of Horror”.[4]

                                      An addiction to drugs and alcohol were his mechanisms to cope with the unhappiness he felt with his life. The frustration he felt towards multiple rejections by publishers in combination with illicit substances caused him to mentally contemplate violence towards his own children.

                                      These intense emotions were those that he focused onto his writing. And that’s why he said:

                                      “We make up horros to help us cope with the real ones.”

                                      Writing became his new coping mechanism, and this is how the master author we know today grew to success.

                                      Fail more often in order to succeed

                                      Like Albert Einstein said, failure really is just success in progress. If you’d rather not to fail, you will probably never succeed.

                                      Success comes from moments of frustrations when you’ll be most uncomfortable with. But after you’ve gone through all those bitter times, you’ll become stronger and you’ll get closer to success.

                                      Don’t be afraid to fail. In fact, start failing, and start failing often; that’s how you will succeed.

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                                      Featured photo credit: Unsplash via unsplash.com

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