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Every Great Legacy Begins With the Willingness to Be Different

Every Great Legacy Begins With the Willingness to Be Different

Growing up I didn’t want to be different. I did everything I could to get people not to notice me. But I was born with a talent that made me stand apart not just from the other kids, but from the girls, too.

For as long as I can remember, I was playing a sport of some kind. From soccer, to tennis, to basketball, to softball. For a brief time, I ran the 800 in junior high. I even coached several of those same sports for my boys or a group of high school girls. Unlike many girls today, I never entered a single dance studio or took a tumbling class.

The most nonathletic thing I ever did was play the accordion (don’t laugh) for two years beginning when I was five years old. Oh, yeah, and the flute in 5th grade. That didn’t last long when I was practicing (what else but) my softball swing and part of the flute flew off and hit my dresser—just what you want to tell your parents about your rented musical instrument. I dabbled in the Girl Scouts for a year, but got tired of wearing green, and I never did have very many patches to put on my sash. In 7th grade, I was a “Rainbow Girl” but grew tired of the “properness” of this secret society.

I was (and to some degree still am) most comfortable doing what I do best.

Otherwise, I spent most of my time with a glove, a pair of cleats, or a ball of some kind. Most recesses were spent playing kickball or tether ball. For years, my stepmom would waste time by putting those pink foam curlers in my hair the night before school pictures and encouraging me to wear dresses to school. What she didn’t know is that I secretly took an extra set of clothes to school to change into—you just can’t play kickball wearing a blue corduroy jumper and black dress shoes.

What I didn’t realize in my attempt to hide among all of the other kids in school was that I actually stood out.

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Because I was good. Because I was different, without even knowing it.

Regardless of how hard I tried to be invisible, I was unable to hide. People still saw me.

But this article isn’t about the clothes I wore in 5th grade or the number of teams I was on while a kid; it’s really about something bigger.

It’s about the legacy we create because we are different. It’s about the rules we think we need to follow to ensure that any potential we have within remains hidden. It’s about the way we are who we were born to be.

If you were to look at all of the great visionaries of the past century, you will find one common quality among them: they all stood out. They all were unique in their own way. They took risks. They failed. They were criticized. They refused to quit. They tried again. They succeeded. They made history.

We all are born with talents unlike anyone else and only our experiences shape those talents into something we either share with the world or we pretend don’t exist. Either way, the real you will eventually come to the surface. It always does.

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Some people set out to change the world at a very early age while others end up doing so almost by accident.

Creating a legacy doesn’t begin with writing history in such a way that we notice it immediately. It isn’t found in some great new invention or a way to feed the hungry. Most often, it begins with something much smaller.

It begins with a single thought. A single idea. A single vision. A single word.

All of those things comes together to start the conversation, to initiate change.

Our willingness to not only notice the world, but react to it in such a way that burying our talents no longer is an option is how we change everything. Our willingness to allow ourselves to be seen and heard is the position we take—not because it is required by others, but because it was bestowed upon us to share.

For far too long, we have permitted ourselves to be hermits and recluses in order to excuse our lack of action and our believed shortcomings. We have done this world and everyone in it a huge injustice and disservice and the only way to rectify it is to be who we were born to be.

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Some were born to swing and never share a single note attached to a melody. Some were born to dance and never grace us while they float on stage. Some were born to play and never make a single team. Some were born to create and never put those ideas to paper or disclose them to anyone else. Some were born to lead, yet sit quietly in the shadows. Some were born to design, to write, to build, but never do.

Instead, they remain where no one can see them, ignoring our need to have their talents shared with us.

Greatness is found in the willingness to be different every time. No one remembers the legacy that looks like every other one. Your legacy cannot be written if it is locked away behind everything you were born to be.

We all have something unique about us and until we find it and share it, we cheat the world.

Need help finding your greatness?

Ask yourself these questions:

  1. What do I LOVE to do?
  2. Where am I most comfortable?
  3. How am I different?
  4. How can I share my gifts with others?

Once you realize and accept you have a gift, no matter how small, you will find moments when it naturally steps out of the shadows as it shows people who you really are. It’s easy to pretend it doesn’t matter and pretend it won’t impact anyone.

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Our legacies are created not after we are gone, but in the life we lived along the way. It is told in the stories, pictures and memories that leave imprints on the lives it touched and become something that is impossible to erase.

Be different. Because you are. The sooner we embrace our gifts instead of fighting against them the better we are for the world and the people in it.

True greatness lies there—and it always will.

Featured photo credit: Lindy Baker via unsplash.com

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Michelle A. Homme

Author, Speaker, Quote Writer, Empowerment Coach

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Last Updated on March 29, 2021

5 Types of Horrible Bosses and How to Beat Them All

5 Types of Horrible Bosses and How to Beat Them All

When I left university I took a job immediately, I had been lucky as I had spent a year earning almost nothing as an intern so I was offered a role. On my first day I found that I had not been allocated a desk, there was no one to greet me so I was left for some hours ignored. I happened to snipe about this to another employee at the coffee machine two things happened. The first was that the person I had complained to was my new manager’s wife, and the second was, in his own words, ‘that he would come down on me like a ton of bricks if I crossed him…’

What a great start to a job! I had moved to a new city, and had been at work for less than a morning when I had my first run in with the first style of bad manager. I didn’t stay long enough to find out what Mr Agressive would do next. Bad managers are a major issue. Research from Approved Index shows that more than four in ten employees (42%) state that they have previously quit a job because of a bad manager.

The Dream Type Of Manager

My best manager was a total opposite. A man who had been the head of the UK tax system and was working his retirement running a company I was a very junior and green employee for. I made a stupid mistake, one which cost a lot of time and money and I felt I was going to be sacked without doubt.

I was nervous, beating myself up about what I had done, what would happen. At the end of the day I was called to his office, he had made me wait and I had spent that day talking to other employees, trying to understand where I had gone wrong. It had been a simple mistyped line of code which sent a massive print job out totally wrong. I learn how I should have done it and I fretted.

My boss asked me to step into his office, he asked me to sit down. “Do you know what you did?” I babbled, yes, I had been stupid, I had not double-checked or asked for advice when I was doing something I had not really understood. It was totally my fault. He paused. “Will you do that again?” Of course I told him I would not, I would always double check, ask for help and not try to be so clever when I was not!

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“Okay…”

That was it. I paused and asked, should I clear my desk. He smiled. “You have learnt a valuable lesson, I can be sure that you will never make a mistake like that again. Why would I want to get rid of an employee who knows that?”

I stayed with that company for many years, the way I was treated was a real object lesson in good management. Sadly, far too many poor managers exist out there.

The Complete Catalogue of Bad Managers

The Bully

My first boss fitted into the classic bully class. This is so often the ‘old school’ management by power style. I encountered this style again in the retail sector where one manager felt the only way to get the best from staff was to bawl and yell.

However, like so many bullies you will often find that this can be someone who either knows no better or is under stress and they are themselves running scared of the situation they have found themselves in.

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The Invisible Boss

This can either present itself as management from afar (usually the golf course or ‘important meetings) or just a boss who is too busy being important to deal with their staff.

It can feel refreshing as you will often have almost total freedom with your manager taking little or no interest in your activities, however you will soon find that you also lack the support that a good manager will provide. Without direction you may feel you are doing well just to find that you are not delivering against expectations you were not told about and suddenly it is all your fault.

The Micro Manager

The frustration of having a manager who feels the need to be involved in everything you do. The polar opposite to the Invisible Boss you will feel that there is no trust in your work as they will want to meddle in everything you do.

Dealing with the micro-manager can be difficult. Often their management style comes from their own insecurity. You can try confronting them, tell them that you can do your job however in many cases this will not succeed and can in fact make things worse.

The Over Promoted Boss

The Over promoted boss categorises someone who has no idea. They have found themselves in a management position through service, family or some corporate mystery. They are people who are not only highly unqualified to be managers they will generally be unable to do even your job.

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You can find yourself persistently frustrated by the situation you are in, however it can seem impossible to get out without handing over your resignation.

The Credit Stealer

The credit stealer is the boss who will never publically acknowledge the work you do. You will put in the extra hours working on a project and you know that, in the ‘big meeting’ it will be your credit stealing boss who will take all of the credit!

Again it is demoralising, you see all of the credit for your labour being stolen and this can often lead to good employees looking for new careers.

3 Essential Ways to Work (Cope) with Bad Managers

Whatever type of bad boss you have there are certain things that you can do to ensure that you get the recognition and protection you require to not only remain sane but to also build your career.

1. Keep evidence

Whether it is incidents with the bully or examples of projects you have completed with the credit stealer you will always be well served to keep notes and supporting evidence for projects you are working on.

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Buy your own notebook and ensure that you are always making notes, it becomes a habit and a very useful one as you have a constant reminder as well as somewhere to explore ideas.

Importantly, if you do have to go to HR or stand-up for yourself you will have clear records! Also, don’t always trust that corporate servers or emails will always be available or not tampered with. Keep your own content.

2. Hold regular meetings

Ensure that you make time for regular meetings with your boss. This is especially useful for the over-promoted or the invisible boss to allow you to ‘manage upwards’. Take charge where you can to set your objectives and use these meetings to set clear objectives and document the status of your work.

3. Stand your ground, but be ready to jump…

Remember that you don’t have to put up with poor management. If you have issues you should face them with your boss, maybe they do not know that they are coming across in a bad way.

However, be ready to recognise if the situation is not going to change. If that is the case, keep your head down and get working on polishing your CV! If it isn’t working, there will be something better out there for you!

Good luck!

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