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Why Women In Their 40s Are Usually Most Fulfilled

Why Women In Their 40s Are Usually Most Fulfilled

People often say that the party ends when you turn 40, especially for the women hitting their menopause at this stage of life. 40 is a number that is usually regarded as a downhill drive for women, in truth, it is not as awful as it is portrayed.

Undoubtedly, menopause is a transition phase in any woman’s life and it surely brings along certain discomforts, such as mood swings, hot flashes and weight gain. But your 40’s are not only about this, there are far more exciting facts this golden year carries within.

1. You’ve become more decisive

Living years under the burden of uncertainities and indecisiveness, the time has finally come when you actually know what you want. At this age you develop the courage to step out of the zone where everyone tells you what you should do with your life.

As a woman we all have experienced this within our families, friends, colleagues and spouses, showing us the directions to take in our lives, which is quite suffocating as an individual. It took you forty years to learn that this is your life and you have the right to spend it as you want to. So you simply cherish these smooth sailing years with a clear head and a certain sense of control over your life.

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2. Maturity teaches you to stop running after idealism

By the time you reach this age you have learnt that the perception of having an ideal life doesn’t really exist. With your own experiences you have understood by now that the grass will always appear greener on the other side, hence you stop comparing your life with others, with the realization that almost everything seems like an epiphany, that we all have problems in our lives and we all live with that.

Just imagine, you’re not bothered by the lives of others in any way. Wow! Somebody should have shown you this back in your teens. With the notion of ‘what if’ fading into the backdrop, you now laugh more, complain less and that’s how in the later years you won’t even mind those laughing lines appearing on your face, as you are too busy being content with what you have.

3. You become healthier and more sleep conscious

Many women start looking more pretty as they age. The primary reason is that they are freed from the burden of raising kids and managing the household. They start becoming more concerned about their health.

Every women desires to look as graceful as she was in her 20s, this encourages them to put more efforts into their health and beauty. Women are found exercising more in their late 30’s or early 40s in contrast to their 20’s. Eating healthier and on time, taking a proper sleep and exercising can make any woman look ravishing.

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4. You work less now

As we age, we discover various beauties of life. If you’re a working woman, you have realized by now that spending all those long hours working to make more and more money wouldn’t do any good to fulfill your void. For those who had to raise children, now is the time that you are free from your responsibilites.

By now you know that it is very important to value time, especially now that you have it, you treat yourself right, giving yourself space and spending on yourself extravagantly. With the passage of time you learn that you should work according to your needs and not just to fill up those accounts.

5. You attain more self confidence

Now is the time when you stop looking up to others and stop worrying about what others might think about you. You feel no anxiety in the pits of your stomach even if you are dressed up differently from the dress code of the party, because nothing matters if you are having fun.

You learn to become carefree, kind of how you were in your teens yet drastically different because now you intend to cherish every little pleasure of life. This devil-may-care attitude proves to be immensely beneficial for you, as your confidence boosts right to the top. You start giving yourself a worth and therefore do not hesitate to share a story or ask for anything. You’re a downright diva at this stage!

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6. You develop your own individuality

From your sense of fashion, to your body language or your mannerisms, all suggest one thing: you have developed your own persona by this age. You don’t find it important to imitate anyone. Your life is different from others and you know your roles.

How you handle day to day living is entirely in your own set ways. This sense of individuality makes you feel empowered, which honestly is better than any other feeling. Most women at this age has a home, children, family, work and much more in her life. The time she spent reaching to this point has developed a unique groomed personality in her. Yes, you’re a lady now!

7. You become more emotionally stable

Can you believe that the pesky roller coaster ride of emotions is finally subduing. Yes indeed, the strike of 40 makes you more stable emotionally. You do not remain that sensitive or touchy for every small little thing.

You realize that no matter what happens, it is not going to be the end of the world even if something is messed up in your life, because you know time doesn’t remain the same and change may be just around the corner. You understand that even if things are not in control right now, you might be able to influence them later on, in worst case scenario you are fine with the fact that it just wasn’t meant to happen. What made you cry in your teens will make you laugh in your 40s! What wonders this age causes, doesn’t it?

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8. Sex becomes a pleasure rather than just a need

Can you believe that sharing intimacy with your partner is not anymore a desperate need to feel fulfilled or just a necessity to maintain a healthy relationship. Now it has developed into means of intense pleasure.

Women in their 40’s enjoy their physical life with a distinct perspective. They do ‘it’ only if they want to have ‘it’ and if they are taking pleasure in it, otherwise it is nearly impossible to turn on a woman without her intention at this age.

9. You save more money

You’re not going to jump into expensive binge shopping just because all other friends are “doing it”. You have gradually turned into a a person who can manage savings with the realization that this might be of help later on, rather than getting something you don’t actually need. It works!

10. You become naughty again

Last but not the least. Most women in their 40’s become more cheerful and naughty as they are mostly done with the things they had in life, duties performed and responsibilities fulfilled; now they know that being serious and stressed all the time will not help them with anything, except catching some premature ageing wrinkles.

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Ahmed Raza

CEO of Samurais.co

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Last Updated on January 15, 2021

7 Ways To Have More Confident Body Language

7 Ways To Have More Confident Body Language

The popular idiomatic saying that “actions speak louder than words” has been around for centuries, but even to this day, most people struggle with at least one area of nonverbal communication. Consequently, many of us aspire to have more confident body language but don’t have the knowledge and tools necessary to change what are largely unconscious behaviors.

Given that others’ perceptions of our competence and confidence are predominantly influenced by what we do with our faces and bodies, it’s important to develop greater self-awareness and consciously practice better posture, stance, eye contact, facial expressions, hand movements, and other aspects of body language.

Posture

First things first: how is your posture? Let’s start with a quick self-assessment of your body.

  • Are your shoulders slumped over or rolled back in an upright posture?
  • When you stand up, do you evenly distribute your weight or lean excessively to one side?
  • Does your natural stance place your feet relatively shoulder-width apart or are your feet and legs close together in a closed-off position?
  • When you sit, does your lower back protrude out in a slumped position or maintain a straight, spine-friendly posture in your seat?

All of these are important considerations to make when evaluating and improving your posture and stance, which will lead to more confident body language over time. If you routinely struggle with maintaining good posture, consider buying a posture trainer/corrector, consulting a chiropractor or physical therapist, stretching daily, and strengthening both your core and back muscles.

Facial Expressions

Are you prone to any of the following in personal or professional settings?

  • Bruxism (tight, clenched jaw or grinding teeth)
  • Frowning and/or furrowing brows
  • Avoiding direct eye contact and/or staring at the ground

If you answered “yes” to any of these, then let’s start by examining various ways in which you can project confident body language through your facial expressions.

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1. Understand How Others Perceive Your Facial Expressions

A December 2020 study by UC Berkeley and Google researchers utilized a deep neural network to analyze facial expressions in six million YouTube clips representing people from over 140 countries. The study found that, despite socio-cultural differences, people around the world tended to use about 70% of the same facial expressions in response to different emotional stimuli and situations.[1]

The study’s researchers also published a fascinating interactive map to demonstrate how their machine learning technology assessed various facial expressions and determined subtle differences in emotional responses.

This study highlights the social importance of facial expressions because whether or not we’re consciously aware of them—by gazing into a mirror or your screen on a video conferencing platform—how we present our faces to others can have tremendous impacts on their perceptions of us, our confidence, and our emotional states. This awareness is the essential first step towards

2. Relax Your Face

New research on bruxism and facial tension found the stresses and anxieties of Covid-19 lockdowns led to considerable increases in orofacial pain, jaw-clenching, and teeth grinding, particularly among women.[2]

The National Institute of Dental and Craniofacial Research estimates that more than 10 million Americans alone have temporomandibular joint dysfunction (TMJ syndrome), and facial tension can lead to other complications such as insomnia, wrinkles, dry skin, and dark, puffy bags under your eyes.[3])

To avoid these unpleasant outcomes, start practicing progressive muscle relaxation techniques and taking breaks more frequently throughout the day to moderate facial tension.[4] You should also try out some biofeedback techniques to enhance your awareness of involuntary bodily processes like facial tension and achieve more confident body language as a result.[5]

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3. Improve Your Eye Contact

Did you know there’s an entire subfield of kinesic communication research dedicated to eye movements and behaviors called oculesics?[6] It refers to various communication behaviors including direct eye contact, averting one’s gaze, pupil dilation/constriction, and even frequency of blinking. All of these qualities can shape how other people perceive you, which means that eye contact is yet another area of nonverbal body language that we should be more mindful of in social interactions.

The ideal type (direct/indirect) and duration of eye contact depends on a variety of factors, such as cultural setting, differences in power/authority/age between the parties involved, and communication context. Research has shown that differences in the effects of eye contact are particularly prominent when comparing East Asian and Western European/North American cultures.[7]

To improve your eye contact with others, strive to maintain consistent contact for at least 3 to 4 seconds at a time, consciously consider where you’re looking while listening to someone else, and practice eye contact as much as possible (as strange as this may seem in the beginning, it’s the best way to improve).

3. Smile More

There are many benefits to smiling and laughing, and when it comes to working on more confident body language, this is an area that should be fun, low-stakes, and relatively stress-free.

Smiling is associated with the “happiness chemical” dopamine and the mood-stabilizing hormone, serotonin. Many empirical studies have shown that smiling generally leads to positive outcomes for the person smiling, and further research has shown that smiling can influence listeners’ perceptions of our confidence and trustworthiness as well.

4. Hand Gestures

Similar to facial expressions and posture, what you do with your hands while speaking or listening in a conversation can significantly influence others’ perceptions of you in positive or negative ways.

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It’s undoubtedly challenging to consciously account for all of your nonverbal signals while simultaneously trying to stay engaged with the verbal part of the discussion, but putting in the effort to develop more bodily awareness now will make it much easier to unconsciously project more confident body language later on.

5. Enhance Your Handshake

In the article, “An Anthropology of the Handshake,” University of Copenhagen social anthropology professor Bjarke Oxlund assessed the future of handshaking in wake of the Covid-19 pandemic:[8]

“Handshakes not only vary in function and meaning but do so according to social context, situation and scale. . . a public discussion should ensue on the advantages and disadvantages of holding on to the tradition of shaking hands as the conventional gesture of greeting and leave-taking in a variety of circumstances.”

It’s too early to determine some of the ways in which Covid-19 has permanently changed our social norms and professional etiquette standards, but it’s reasonable to assume that handshaking may retain its importance in American society even after this pandemic. To practice more confident body language in the meantime, the video on the science of the perfect handshake below explains what you need to know.

6. Complement Your Verbals With Hand Gestures

As you know by now, confident communication involves so much more than simply smiling more or sounding like you know what you’re talking about. What you do with your hands can be particularly influential in how others perceive you, whether you’re fidgeting with an object, clenching your fists, hiding your hands in your pockets, or calmly gesturing to emphasize important points you’re discussing.

Social psychology researchers have found that “iconic gestures”—hand movements that appear to be meaningfully related to the speaker’s verbal content—can have profound impacts on listeners’ information retention. In other words, people are more likely to engage with you and remember more of what you said when you speak with complementary hand gestures instead of just your voice.[9]

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Further research on hand gestures has shown that even your choice of the left or right hand for gesturing can influence your ability to clearly convey information to listeners, which supports the notion that more confident body language is readily achievable through greater self-awareness and deliberate nonverbal actions.[10]

Final Takeaways

Developing better posture, enhancing your facial expressiveness, and practicing hand gestures can vastly improve your communication with other people. At first, it will be challenging to consciously practice nonverbal behaviors that many of us are accustomed to performing daily without thinking about them.

If you ever feel discouraged, however, remember that there’s no downside to consistently putting in just a little more time and effort to increase your bodily awareness. With the tips and strategies above, you’ll be well on your way to embracing more confident body language and amplifying others’ perceptions of you in no time.

More Tips on How to Develop a Confident Body Language

Featured photo credit: Maria Lupan via unsplash.com

Reference

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