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This Is Why It’s Really Great To Make Friends With Boyish Girls

This Is Why It’s Really Great To Make Friends With Boyish Girls

Not all girls enjoy shopping at the mall, getting their nails done and gossiping about their friends; there are, in fact, girls who act kind of boyish.

When most people think of boyish girls they might imagine someone who wears a baseball cap with a ponytail sticking out, a plaid shirt and baggy cut-off shorts. Or a girl who hates makeup, love sports and is maybe even a little insensitive. I’m sure you aren’t surprised that there are a lot of stereotypes around boyish girls, (also known as tomboys).

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As a full-fledged boyish girl, I know what it’s like to be misunderstood. Since middle school I’ve been asked repeatedly if I’m a lesbian because I act like a dude: I have a crude sense of humour, poor posture, prefer short hair (because it’s easier to maintain, duh), hate wearing skirts and dresses, and I love getting my hands dirty (I’m not afraid of spiders, or picking up ooey-gooey things). But just because I’m into video games and prefer denim over lace doesn’t mean I’m any less of a woman than a girly-girl.

In fact, boyish girls have a lot of positive traits that everyone can appreciate.

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They’re Playful

Boyish girls are really playful people. They love getting in the game, whether it’s a friendly touch football match or an all out competition on Xbox. Not only are they willing to jump into sports and video games, but they love to joke around, egging you on to race them, encouraging play fights and even joining in on poker night. These ladies love being invited out to hit a few balls or catch a game at the local sports bar.

They’re Low Maintenance

Some girls can take hours getting ready to go out, but boyish girls are quick to leave the house. Although many boyish girls still enjoy dressing up and doing their makeup, they typically keep it much more simple and minimal compared to their girly friends (while still looking hot). Despite what a lot of people think, boyish girls do enjoy getting dolled up now and then; it’s just that we realize a little bit of mascara and lip gloss can go a long way, and tights jeans paired with a sexy top is just as attractive (and a lot more practical) than a slinky dress.

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They’re Easygoing

While a stereotypical girly girl is not only high-maintenance in her appearance, but also her personality, boyish girls are often a lot more easygoing. They’re comfortable being themselves and therefore more relaxed in their behavior and moods. A lot of girls (and guys) appreciate this quality because it makes boyish girls really easy to talk to. Instead of getting you all worked up over some “dramatic: situation, they’re more likely to help you calm down and see things more clearly.

They’re Adventurous

Boyish girls love adventure! They enjoy the outdoors, travel and trying new things, because, really, what’s the worst that could happen? (Remember they’re also easygoing.) Their adventurous spirit can be a good thing, not only because it’s fun for other adventurous people, but because they help bring their more timid friends out their comfort zones.

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They Have a Great Sense of Humor

And, of course, boyish girls love to laugh! They can find the humour in almost anything from slapstick comedy to crude stand-up, and when they laugh, they genuinely laugh, without trying to hold it in or stifle their giggles. While some boyish girls can take their humor too far (I’ve been known to), their sense of humor is usually well appreciated by their friends and family.

Just because boyish girls are a little, well, boyish, doesn’t mean they don’t make great gal pals or that they’re necessarily secretly a lesbian; they simply enjoy different things and should be appreciated for it.

Featured photo credit: Flickr via flickr.com

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Last Updated on December 3, 2019

10 Life Lessons You’d Better Learn Early on in Life

10 Life Lessons You’d Better Learn Early on in Life

There are so many lessons I wish I had learned while I was young enough to appreciate and apply them. The thing with wisdom, and often with life lessons in general, is that they’re learned in retrospect, long after we needed them. The good news is that other people can benefit from our experiences and the lessons we’ve learned.

Here’re 10 important life lessons you should learn early on:

1. Money Will Never Solve Your Real Problems

Money is a tool; a commodity that buys you necessities and some nice “wants,” but it is not the panacea to your problems.

There are a great many people who are living on very little, yet have wonderfully full and happy lives… and there are sadly a great many people are living on quite a lot, yet have terribly miserable lives.

Money can buy a nice home, a great car, fabulous shoes, even a bit of security and some creature comforts, but it cannot fix a broken relationship, or cure loneliness, and the “happiness” it brings is only fleeting and not the kind that really and truly matters. Happiness is not for sale. If you’re expecting the “stuff” you can buy to “make it better,” you will never be happy.

2. Pace Yourself

Often when we’re young, just beginning our adult journey we feel as though we have to do everything at once. We need to decide everything, plan out our lives, experience everything, get to the top, find true love, figure out our life’s purpose, and do it all at the same time.

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Slow down—don’t rush into things. Let your life unfold. Wait a bit to see where it takes you, and take time to weigh your options. Enjoy every bite of food, take time to look around you, let the other person finish their side of the conversation. Allow yourself time to think, to mull a bit.

Taking action is critical. Working towards your goals and making plans for the future is commendable and often very useful, but rushing full-speed ahead towards anything is a one-way ticket to burnout and a good way to miss your life as it passes you by.

3. You Can’t Please Everyone

“I don’t know the secret to success, but the secret to failure is trying to please everyone” – Bill Cosby.

You don’t need everyone to agree with you or even like you. It’s human nature to want to belong, to be liked, respected and valued, but not at the expense of your integrity and happiness. Other people cannot give you the validation you seek. That has to come from inside.

Speak up, stick to your guns, assert yourself when you need to, demand respect, stay true to your values.

4. Your Health Is Your Most Valuable Asset

Health is an invaluable treasure—always appreciate, nurture, and protect it. Good health is often wasted on the young before they have a chance to appreciate it for what it’s worth.

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We tend to take our good health for granted, because it’s just there. We don’t have to worry about it, so we don’t really pay attention to it… until we have to.

Heart disease, bone density, stroke, many cancers—the list of many largely preventable diseases is long, so take care of your health now, or you’ll regret it later on.

5. You Don’t Always Get What You Want

“Life is what happens while you’re busy making other plans.” – John Lennon

No matter how carefully you plan and how hard you work, sometimes things just don’t work out the way you want them to… and that’s okay.

We have all of these expectations; predetermined visions of what our “ideal” life will look like, but all too often, that’s not the reality of the life we end up with. Sometimes our dreams fail and sometimes we just change our minds mid-course. Sometimes we have to flop to find the right course and sometimes we just have to try a few things before we find the right direction.

6. It’s Not All About You

You are not the epicenter of the universe. It’s very difficult to view the world from a perspective outside of your own, since we are always so focused on what’s happening in our own lives. What do I have to do today? What will this mean for me, for my career, for my life? What do I want?

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It’s normal to be intensely aware of everything that’s going on in your own life, but you need to pay as much attention to what’s happening around you, and how things affect other people in the world as you do to your own life. It helps to keep things in perspective.

7. There’s No Shame in Not Knowing

No one has it all figured out. Nobody has all the answers. There’s no shame in saying “I don’t know.” Pretending to be perfect doesn’t make you perfect. It just makes you neurotic to keep up the pretense of manufactured perfection.

We have this idea that there is some kind of stigma or shame in admitting our limitations or uncertainly, but we can’t possibly know everything. We all make mistakes and mess up occasionally. We learn as we go, that’s life.

Besides—nobody likes a know-it-all. A little vulnerability makes you human and oh so much more relatable.

8. Love Is More Than a Feeling; It’s a Choice

That burst of initial exhilaration, pulse quickening love and passion does not last long. But that doesn’t mean long-lasting love is not possible.

Love is not just a feeling; it’s a choice that you make every day. We have to choose to let annoyances pass, to forgive, to be kind, to respect, to support, to be faithful.

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Relationships take work. Sometimes it’s easy and sometimes it’s incredibly hard. It is up to us to choose how we want to act, think and speak in a relationship.

9. Perspective Is a Beautiful Thing

Typically, when we’re worried or upset, it’s because we’ve lost perspective. Everything that is happening in our lives seems so big, so important, so do or die, but in the grand picture, this single hiccup often means next to nothing.

The fight we’re having, the job we didn’t get, the real or imagined slight, the unexpected need to shift course, the thing we wanted, but didn’t get. Most of it won’t matter 20, 30, 40 years from now. It’s hard to see long term when all you know is short term, but unless it’s life-threatening, let it go, and move on.

10. Don’t Take Anything for Granted

We often don’t appreciate what we have until it’s gone: that includes your health, your family and friends, your job, the money you have or think you will have tomorrow.

When you’re young, it seems that your parents will always be there, but they won’t. You think you have plenty of time to get back in touch with your old friends or spend time with new ones, but you don’t. You have the money to spend, or you think you’ll have it next month, but you might not.

Nothing in your life is not guaranteed to be there tomorrow, including those you love.

This is a hard life lesson to learn, but it may be the most important of all: Life can change in an instant. Make sure you appreciate what you have, while you still have it.

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Featured photo credit: Ben Eaton via unsplash.com

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