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21 Moments Only Close Roommates Experience

21 Moments Only Close Roommates Experience

You moved in with your best friend and things couldn’t be any better! Not only is there a BFF right there for a 2 AM update on that one guy who texts every two days, but they are there for pranks, dinner, or just hanging out. If you’re part of a gal-pal gang with a shared headquarters, here is a massive list of 21 things you can definitely relate to.

1. Your Sisters Would Never Understand

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    As much as you refer to your roommate as a sister, your real sisters only wish they could be that close to you. You and your roommate are so close, it’s as though you shared a womb—despite having different mothers.

    2. Dealing With The Dishes!

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      As much as you love your roommate, you still don’t want to catch some icky bug—Ascaris is not pleasant! Whether it’s the dishes or the tub, there is always some area that you need to be clean that they just can’t understand. The dishes are definitely a hotly contested subject for many roommate situations.

      3. There’s Hair In Every Corner

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        While your long hair seems to creep into the carpet, your car, and every part of your boyfriend’s apartment, having two or more of you in the house seems to double the trouble. Small brown hair bunnies seem to drift around your hardwood floors like a cowboy on the range, and your tub has never drained right since you moved in. While it’s kind of gross, at least there is a tiny piece of her with you everywhere you go.

        4. The One Who Cooks Is Queen

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          Oh, what? You need the apartment for a night, but I can have this cheesecake? Oh yeah, sure thing, how long should I be gone for?

          Seriously, whoever cooks is queen. While you will always love your other roommates, the one whose drunken hobby is making cakes is your absolute favorite! The best roommate is the one who cooks, and cooking parties are the best way to pass the time, or to turn into one of those…

          5. Random Dance Parties!

          The fliest dance parties in the hemisphere will always be held in your kitchen. You lay down sick dance moves anytime, day or night. It’s pretty much the best thing you can do to relieve the stress of a long day, it’s exercise, it’s super fun, and it only gets better with a group of kick-a** roommates.

          6. TV Nights Can Have You OBSESSED

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            TV nights will have you and your roommate obsessed. Forget the bae, you’re talking about “A” from Pretty Little Liars—it’s not a romantic thing, although you would expect all the scorn of a cheated lover from your roommate if you did happen to watch ahead.

            7. That Moment When Everyone Gets Sucked Into A Single Interest

            It’s not just the boob-tube that sucks you in, you and your roommate rebound off each other for everything. Whether it’s the color mint or growing a backyard garden, getting into hobbies has never been more exciting or enjoyable as when you are doing it together. Figuring out plant pairings is just as exhilarating as stealing a cop car when you do it with your live-in BFF!

            8. When Someone Goes Missing For A Moment (whether for finals or a mini-vacation)

            You never really realize how close you and your roommate are until the first time they leave on a long vacation. Whether it’s for finals or to find Europe’s best beer, you find yourself wandering around the apartment all by your lonesome, touching the walls, peeing with the door open, and living like a wildebeest until their return.

            9. There’s Always Someone To Lean On

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            Theo enjoying a moment on New Year's Day with his best friend Marco

              Whether it’s 3 AM or a Tuesday morning, it’s always great to have that roommate there to lean on. There are so many deep questions that need answering or texts that need urgent evaluation.

              10. That One Thing You Both Promised To Never Talk About Again (but there are so many questions!)

              You don’t even want to know what you just walked in on, but you totally do. There are so many questions!

              While you can never talk about it again, you desperately need to know. If you walked into a weird moment, let us know. We need answers.

              11. Judging Blind Dates From The Window

              As the live-in best friend, you have the end-all say to what goes on. Whether it’s sending the emergency SOS text to help them escape a bad date, or helping judge an attractive potential mate from the window, close roommates know how to make a great choice.

              12. Encouraging Better Habits

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                Close roommates know that having someone right there can encourage great habits, like exercising or better study habits. Having someone there to boost your confidence can even make negotiating a salary when you go on job interviews a little easier. Your roomie is a superb source of confidence!

                13. The Pranks!

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                  There is nothing better than a housemate you can prank. A comrade with a sense of humour will help inspire some of the grandest mischief in the world! Maybe duct taping things to the ceiling is your cup of tea, or hiding small pictures of the Bonus-Jonas everywhere until you finally complete the prank by taking them to a mystery concert with a surprise guest: the Bonus-Jonas!

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                  Pranks. One of the best things about a high-quality bunkmate.

                  14. New Levels Of Passive Aggression

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                    Whole new levels of passive aggression are born in any roommate situation. Signs or memes can be created with the sole purpose of getting someone to do something without freaking out and yelling “just do it!”

                    15. You Have A Second Wardrobe — And A Real Opinion On Your Own…

                    You just got a second wardrobe. Need a great pair of skinny jeans for a date or just need an outfit opinion? Ask them. Not only do you get a real opinion, but maybe they have a better idea. It’s pure magic.

                    16. Mastering The Sneak Around

                    If you made it past the passive aggressive stage of your relationship, you have probably also mastered the sneak around technique. While you and your closest companion have strange schedules, making as little noise as possible has evolved into something of an art form. From saving the microwave beeps at the last second and taking your shoes off at the door, you guys are noise ninjas.

                    17. They Are Always There When You Need Them

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                      It’s not just about having someone to lean on, it’s about everything from advice to a ride when your tire goes flat. Having another member in your pack is amazing for everyone in the house.

                      18. 2 AM Conversations About Everything

                      It’s those strange late-night conversations that explore aspects of the world that take you from regular roomies to the next level. Only ride-or-die roomies know about the endless fathoms that you can explore with moonlit talks. It’s unworldly, beautiful, and will help you solve every problem and leave you refreshed.

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                      19. When You Hear A Certain Playlist From Their Room, It’s Time To Go AWOL

                      You just heard your roommate come in, and you get up to go chat about whatever. Then it starts—that track that you know you should disappear for. The second it starts, your lip curls. You grab your stuff and run to the library. An early 2000s country love jam is not something to stick around for.

                      20. Y’all Are A Bunch Of Creeps

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                        Whether it’s the muscular mailman or just a particularly pleasing jogger, you and your roommate have mutually creeped on some studly piece of something wandering around your neighborhood. That barista that gave you both hearts in your coffee. Definitely. Beyonce. For sure—girl-crushing hard. Y’all are a bunch of creeps and it’s great.

                        21. You Will Still Love Every Day Living With Them!

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                          You are so in-sync that no backstreet can take you and your roommate. If you wouldn’t change your living situation for anything, then you know you really are a close set of roommates

                          Featured photo credit: http://blog.goway.com/globetrotting/2015/11/5-reasons-to-go-with-your-girlfriends-on-a-fiji-vacation/ via blog.goway.com

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                          Last Updated on May 21, 2019

                          How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

                          How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

                          For all our social media bravado, we live in a society where communication is seen less as an art, and more as a perfunctory exercise. We spend so much time with people, yet we struggle with how to meaningfully communicate.

                          If you believe you have mastered effective communication, scan the list below and see whether you can see yourself in any of the examples:

                          Example 1

                          You are uncomfortable with a person’s actions or comments, and rather than telling the individual immediately, you sidestep the issue and attempt to move on as though the offending behavior or comment never happened.

                          You move on with the relationship and develop a pattern of not addressing challenging situations. Before long, the person with whom you are in relationship will say or do something that pushes you over the top and predictably, you explode or withdraw completely from the relationship.

                          In this example, hard-to-speak truths become never- expressed truths that turn into resentment and anger.

                          Example 2

                          You communicate from the head and without emotion. While what you communicate makes perfect sense to you, it comes across as cold because it lacks emotion.

                          People do not understand what motivates you to say what you say, and without sharing your feelings and emotions, others experience you as rude, cold or aggressive.

                          You will know this is a problem if people shy away from you, ignore your contributions in meetings or tell you your words hurt. You can also know you struggle in this area if you find yourself constantly apologizing for things you have said.

                          Example 3

                          You have an issue with one person, but you communicate your problem to an entirely different person.

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                          The person in whom you confide lacks the authority to resolve the matter troubling you, and while you have vented and expressed frustration, the underlying challenge is unresolved.

                          Example 4

                          You grew up in a family with destructive communication habits and those habits play out in your current relationships.

                          Because you have never stopped to ask why you communicate the way you do and whether your communication style still works, you may lack understanding of how your words impact others and how to implement positive change.

                          If you find yourself in any of the situations described above, this article is for you.

                          Communication can build or decimate worlds and it is important we get it right. Regardless of your professional aspirations or personal goals, you can improve your communication skills if you:

                          • Understand your own communication style
                          • Tailor your style depending on the needs of the audience
                          • Communicate with precision and care
                          • Be mindful of your delivery, timing and messenger

                          1. Understand Your Communication Style

                          To communicate effectively, you must understand the communication legacy passed down from our parents, grandparents or caregivers. Each of us grew up with spoken and unspoken rules about communication.

                          In some families, direct communication is practiced and honored. In other families, family members are encouraged to shy away from difficult conversations. Some families appreciate open and frank dialogue and others do not. Other families practice silence about substantive matters, that is, they seldom or rarely broach difficult conversations at all.

                          Before you can appreciate the nuance required in communication, it helps to know the familial patterns you grew up with.

                          2. Learn Others Communication Styles

                          Communicating effectively requires you to take a step back, assess the intended recipient of your communication and think through how the individual prefers to be communicated with. Once you know this, you can tailor your message in a way that increases the likelihood of being heard. This also prevents you from assuming the way you communicate with one group is appropriate or right for all groups or people.

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                          If you are unsure how to determine the styles of the groups or persons with whom you are interacting, you can always ask them:

                          “How do you prefer to receive information?”

                          This approach requires listening, both to what the individuals say as well as what is unspoken. Virgin Group CEO Richard Branson noted that the best communicators are also great listeners.

                          To communicate effectively from relationship to relationship and situation to situation, you must understand the communication needs of others.

                          3. Exercise Precision and Care

                          A recent engagement underscored for me the importance of exercising care when communicating.

                          On a recent trip to Ohio, I decided to meet up with an old friend to go for a walk. As we strolled through the soccer park, my friend gently announced that he had something to talk about, he was upset with me. His introduction to the problem allowed me to mentally shift gears and prepare for the conversation.

                          Shortly after introducing the shift in conversation, my friend asked me why I didn’t invite him to the launch party for my business. He lives in Ohio and I live in the D.C. area.

                          I explained that the event snuck up on me, and I only started planning the invite list three weeks before the event. Due to the last-minute nature of the gathering, I opted to invite people in the DMV area versus my friends from outside the area – I didn’t want to be disrespectful by asking them to travel on such short notice.

                          I also noted that I didn’t want to be disappointed if he and others declined to come to the event. So I played it safe in terms of inviting people who were local.

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                          In the moment, I felt the conversation went very well. I also checked in with my friend a few days after our walk, affirmed my appreciation for his willingness to communicate his upset and our ability to work through it.

                          The way this conversation unfolded exemplified effective communication. My friend approached me with grace and vulnerability. He approached me with a level of curiosity that didn’t put me on my heels — I was able to really listen to what he was saying, apologize for how my decision impacted him and vow that going forward, I would always ask rather than making decisions for him and others.

                          Our relationship is intact, and I now have information that will help me become a better friend to him and others.

                          4. Be Mindful of Delivery, Timing and Messenger

                          Communicating effectively also requires thinking through the delivery of the message one intends to communicate as well as the appropriate time for the discussion.

                          In an Entrepreneur.com column, VIP Contributor Deep Patel, noted that persons interested in communicating well need to master the art of timing. Patel noted,[1]

                          “Great comedians, like all great communicators, are able to feel out their audience to determine when to move on to a new topic or when to reiterate an idea.”

                          Communicating effectively also requires thoughtfulness about the messenger. A person prone to dramatic, angry outbursts should never be called upon to deliver constructive feedback, especially to people whom they do not know. The immediate aftermath of a mass shooting is not the ideal time to talk about the importance of the Second Amendment rights.

                          Like everyone else, I must work to ensure my communication is layered with precision and care.

                          It requires precision because words must be carefully tailored to the person with whom you are speaking.

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                          It requires intentionality because before one communicates, one should think about the audience and what the audience needs in order to hear your message the way you intended it to be communicated.

                          It requires active listening which is about hearing verbal and nonverbal messages.

                          Even though we may be right in what we say, how we say it could derail the impact of the message and the other parties’ ability to hear the message.

                          Communicating with care is also about saying things that the people in our life need to hear and doing so with love.

                          The Bottom Line

                          When I left the meeting with my dear friend, I wondered if I was replicating or modeling this level of openness and transparency in the rest of my relationships.

                          I was intrigued and appreciative. He’d clearly thought about what he wanted to say to me, picked the appropriate time to share his feedback and then delivered it with care. He hit the ball out of the park and I’m hopeful we all do the same.

                          More Articles About Effective Communication

                          Featured photo credit: Kenan Buhic via unsplash.com

                          Reference

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