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10 Things That Happen When You Move Across the Country

10 Things That Happen When You Move Across the Country

East and West, New York and LA—the two extreme sides of this country are so different that, at times, they can feel like different countries altogether. So when you find yourself moving from one to the other, needless to say, there are going to be a lot of adjustments for you to get used to. Here are some of the things you can expect to happen if you decide to make the big move.

1. The way you get from A to B completely transforms.

The car is king in Los Angeles, but upon moving to New York, you’re bound to discover fairly quickly that it’s often not worth even owning a car at all. People tend to get around using the subway, walking, and through hiring the occasional taxi. Conversely, when you move in the other direction, you will soon find that public transport is no longer a staple, and you will have to drive just about anywhere you need to be (with plenty of traffic on the way).

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2. You have to get used to a completely new climate.

The perpetual sunshine of LA could not be more different from the four contrasting seasons that you will experience on the East Coast. Whether you are moving east or west, you will no doubt have to completely transform your wardrobe to adjust to the new climate.

3. You end up answering endless questions about your previous city of residence.

Whichever direction you are moving, be prepared to answer the same questions over and over about your recent move—it’s just part and parcel of moving someplace new, especially when that new place is across the other side of the country. “Oh, you just moved from ___? That’s a big adjustment! How are you settling in here in ____? What made you move?” And so on.

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4. They speak a whole different language.

OK, so maybe they don’t literally speak a different language, but there are a so many nuances in the speech, slang, and culture of each big city that sometimes it can feel as though they really do. Lucky for you, it should only take a few months to get used to the new city and you’ll be talking about the MTA like a pro.

5. There is a whole new social scene to get used to.

And along with the language—in fact, a large part of what influences it—there is a whole new social scene to get used to. And though drinks with friends is a near-universal activity, certain location-specific features mean that you will have to adjust to other things accordingly. For example, it’s a lot more common to spend a day or evening at the beach when you live in LA than in New York.

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6. You get involved in a lot of arguments about food.

In n’ Out versus Shake Shack, pizza versus Mexican—one thing that locals of any given city are particularly passionate about is food. It will be hard for you not to romanticize the food in your previous city, but don’t worry: you will have plenty of people with whom you can debate the matter.

7. You still spend just as much money.

Another universal fact about large cities, especially LA and New York, is that they are not cheap places to reside. From the cost of rent, to transport, and even food, you won’t need to adjust your budget very much as high prices will break the bank on either coast.

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8. The concept of space is completely different.

When compared with the history of New York, Los Angeles is a relatively new city. It is for this reason that it was built for cars and roads. It also means that there is generally a lot more space to be found in LA. If you make the move across to New York, you will probably find that what constitutes a large space is no longer as big as it once was.

9. You meet plenty of diverse and interesting new people.

While it can be a difficult adjustment at first, one comfort of moving to one of these big cities is that you will meet a lot of other “outsiders” like yourself, who moved from similarly far-off places. Meeting new and interesting people every day is one of the best things about living in a big city.

10. You miss home occasionally, but still love your new city.

All of these things may be a scary prospect at first, but it doesn’t take long to fit into the rhythm of a brand new city. If you embrace the differences, rather than fighting against them, you will soon find that any homesickness fades away and you will grow to love your new home as much as your old one.

Featured photo credit: cofiem/City via flic.kr

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Bethany Cleg

Photographer, Entrepreneur

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Last Updated on February 15, 2019

Why Is Goal Setting Important to a Truly Fulfilling Life?

Why Is Goal Setting Important to a Truly Fulfilling Life?

In Personal Development-speak, we are always talking about goals, outcomes, success, desires and dreams. In other words, all the stuff we want to do, achieve and create in our world.

And while it’s important for us to know what we want to achieve (our goal), it’s also important for us to understand why we want to achieve it; the reason behind the goal or some would say, our real goal.

Why is goal setting important?

1. Your needs and desire will be fulfilled.

Sometimes when we explore our “why”, (why we want to achieve a certain thing) we realize that our “what” (our goal) might not actually deliver us the thing (feeling, emotion, internal state) we’re really seeking.

For example, the person who has a goal to lose weight in the belief that weight loss will bring them happiness, security, fulfillment, attention, popularity and the partner of their dreams. In this instance, their “what” is weight-loss and their “why” is happiness (etc.) and a partner.

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Six months later, they have lost the weight (achieved their goal) but as is often the case, they’re not happier, not more secure, not more confident, not more fulfilled and in keeping with their miserable state, they have failed to attract their dream partner.

After all, who wants to be with someone who’s miserable? They achieved their practical goal but still failed to have their needs met.

So they set a goal to lose another ten pounds. And then another. And maybe just ten more. With the destructive and erroneous belief that if they can get thin enough, they’ll find their own personal nirvana. And we all know how that story ends.

2. You’ll find out what truly motivates you

The important thing in the process of constructing our best life is not necessarily what goals we set (what we think we want) but what motivates us towards those goals (what we really want).

The sooner we begin to explore, identify and understand what motivates us towards certain achievements, acquisitions or outcomes (that is, we begin moving towards greater consciousness and self awareness), the sooner we will make better decisions for our life, set more intelligent (and dare I say, enlightened) goals and experience more fulfilment and less frustration.

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We all know people who have achieved what they set out to, only to end up in the same place or worse (emotionally, psychologically, sociologically) because what they were chasing wasn’t really what they were needing.

What we think we want will rarely provide us with what we actually need.

3. Your state of mind will be a lot healthier

We all set specific goals to achieve/acquire certain things (a job, a car, a partner, a better body, a bank balance, a title, a victory) because at some level, most of us believe (consciously or not) that the achievement of those goals will bring us what we really seek; joy, fulfilment, happiness, safety, peace, recognition, love, acceptance, respect, connection.

Of course, setting practical, material and financial goals is an intelligent thing to do considering the world we live in and how that world works.

But setting goals with an expectation that the achievement of certain things in our external, physical world will automatically create an internal state of peace, contentment, joy and total happiness is an unhealthy and unrealistic mindset to inhabit.

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What you truly want and need

Sometimes we need to look beyond the obvious (superficial) goals to discover and secure what we really want.

Sadly, we live in a collective mindset which teaches that the prettiest and the wealthiest are the most successful.

Some self-help frauds even teach this message. If you’re rich or pretty, you’re happy. If you’re both, you’re very happy. Pretty isn’t what we really want; it’s what we believe pretty will bring us. Same goes with money.

When we cut through the hype, the jargon and the self-help mumbo jumbo, we all have the same basic goals, desires and needs:

Joy, fulfilment, happiness, safety, peace, recognition, love, acceptance, respect, connection.

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Nobody needs a mansion or a sport’s car but we all need love.

Nobody needs massive pecs, six percent body-fat, a face lift or bigger breasts but we all need connection, acceptance and understanding.

Nobody needs to be famous but we all need peace, calm, balance and happiness.

The problem is, we live in a culture which teaches that one equals the other. If only we lived in a culture which taught that real success is far more about what’s happening in our internal environment, than our external one.

It’s a commonly-held belief that we’re all very different and we all have different goals — whether short term or long term goals. But in many ways we’re not, and we don’t; we all want essentially the same things.

Now all you have to do is see past the fraud and deception and find the right path.

Featured photo credit: Unsplash via unsplash.com

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