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34 Signs That You’re Having A Quarter-Life Crisis

34 Signs That You’re Having A Quarter-Life Crisis

Both my parents had mid-life crises. I witnessed them first-hand because they were just a few years ago while I was in college. They both handled them differently. My dad decided that he wanted to be “young and virile,” so he joined a gym, ate lots of salads, and I think he even had a fling or two.

My mom decided that her life had become meaningless. Her job was not fulfilling, she had an empty nest, and she wanted to “find” herself again. So she went back to school and became a paralegal.

They have made it through their crises and are now settled into comfortable lives, enjoying their post-children years. I, however, am not so settled. All of a sudden, I have hit a crisis – a quarter-life crisis that I didn’t see coming and that I didn’t even know existed on this life journey.

If you are 20-something and experiencing these symptoms, you share my crisis.

1. You’re Turning at Least 25 This Year

Somehow, it’s a horrible milestone — it’s at least halfway to 30, and we know how bad 30 looks. Tiny fine lines will appear. Our parents will be asking when we are going to settle down, get married, and buy a house. Yikes!

2. You’re Wrestling With the Meaning of Adulthood

Is 25 an adult, really? Can you still have just some of the immaturity of 20? Maybe call up your college buddies, take a road trip, and get some crazy tattoos in a sleazy Mexican parlor? Then you start to worry about adult things like safety and infections and you realize that your youth has departed.

3. You’re Fudging on Your Age

You tell that cute college guy or gal you meet in a bar that you are only 22. I mean really, what’s 3 years or so? You can tell yourself that you really “feel” 22, and that age is just an attitude anyway. Nice try.

4. You’re Not Relating to Your Favorite Songs Anymore

Song lyrics are speaking to you. “I’m not a girl, not yet a woman” comes to mind. Except that you were singing that in college, not now. Now the lyrics need to be “I’m a woman, but can I still act like a girl?”

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5. Your Mirror is Rebelling When You Drink

A night of drinking means a full day of bad hair, dark circles, and an avoidance of all spicy smells. Fond memories of all-night binges are just those – fond memories.

6. You’re Seeing an Early Sun on Saturday Morning

You are suddenly getting up early on Saturday morning to clean, do laundry, and run important errands. These things have suddenly up-ticked on your priority list, along with daily planners and appointment reminders.

7. Your Mind Allows the Dreaded “M” Word to Creep In

Getting into a relationship comes with new fears. Will the other person begin to think long-term? Is this one it? To even hold a thought of marriage is something that proves you are now an adult.

8. You’re Skipping the Frozen Food Aisles

You find yourself shopping around the outer edges of the grocery store where all the fresh foods are housed, because health is becoming more important. And you are actually using pots and pans and a stove.

9. You’re Beginning to Think and Sound Like Your Parents

You are the one watching teenage antics and commenting on how immature they are or becoming annoyed with a child having a temper tantrum in a store aisle. God, you are beginning to sound like your parents.

10. You’re Beginning to Worry About What the Neighbors Think

You decide to clean up the yard even though you are only renting, and you actually go buy some plants and put them in the ground. What’s more, you become a responsible pet owner and actually take those little baggies with you when you go for a walk.

11. You’re Beginning to Use Adult Language And Standards

You’ve raised your standards about who you hang with and begin to look for networking opportunities – wow, even the word “networking” is scary.

12. You’re Beginning to Let Comfort Trump Style

You find yourself looking at more sensible shoes at the store, especially for work – how did this happen? And you watch younger kids just romping around in those 6-inch, pointy-toed things without even a worry about falling or getting a bunion.

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13. You’re Beginning to See New Meaning in Dr. Seuss

You are beginning to see deeper meaning in those Dr. Seuss books that you occasionally read to your nieces and nephews, and somehow the fun of them is all gone.

14. Your Purchases are Beginning to Change

You forego buying new clothes because you have to get a new vacuum cleaner. And you buy an iron.

15. You’re Dreading Some of Those Family Holidays

You go to the huge family holiday meal and all of the older relatives are asking when you are going to settle down. In between descriptions of her paralegal courses, your mother makes hints about how she wants to be a grandmother. You suddenly don’t feel well and leave early. Home alone with the TV is better than this.

16. You’re Losing Your Spontaneity

You are seriously ready to turn down a long overseas jaunt to see the world in order to keep your career on track. Wouldn’t even have been a contest 4 years ago.

17. You’re Developing an Appreciation for Your Parents

You actually start to feel some guilt about how you treated your parents as a teenager. Now that’s a maturity level that has really crept up. These thoughts usually come up when you are cleaning up after your roommate who can’t seem to wash a dish or put a new toilet paper roll on.

18. You’re No Longer Allowed to be Helpless

You realize that you’ll never be able to fake being helpless again, unless it is asking your mother for a recipe or how to get a stain out of the rug.

19. You’re on Your Own with the IRS

You are doing your own taxes like a real grownup, and it’s not nice. And you actually read those instructions that come with the tax forms.

20. You’re Worrying More About Those Incisors

You are no longer avoiding the dentist but are making regular appointments for cleanings and checkups.

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21. You’re Making Decisions Like Adults Do

You actually think about the pros and cons of something before doing it. And you are making decisions that would make your parents happy. Where did all of that wild abandon go?

22. You’re Worried When You are Overdrawn

You realize that you should have paid far more attention to that personal finance course you had. And you understand that budgets are really not for “wimps.”

23. You’re Actually Checking Your Credit Card Balance

You are no longer making those impulse buys that rack up your credit card debt. Wow, this would never have happened 4 years ago!

24. You’re Losing the Old Gang

Friends are starting to move away – close friends, good friends. And you are not prepared to really deal with that.

25. You’re Taking Work Seriously

You begin to think of your job as a career and start looking at the long-term future. And you are putting money into a 401K. Secretly, you are longing for days gone by when you had those part-time jobs that you could just quit because there were always other ones you could find.

26. You’re Resenting the Freedom Others Have

You look at friends who are traveling all the time and don’t feel happy for them anymore, as you sit at your desk waiting for that two-week annual vacation.

27. You’re Becoming the Boring One

You are asking your roommates to keep it down after 10 p.m. because you have an early meeting in the morning. And before you go to bed, you actually watch the news and weather reports.

28. You’re Thrilled to Get “Carded”

You are no longer “carded” at bars and liquor stores, and you are scrutinizing your face in mirrors, trying to figure out how you look over 21 now. You are absolutely thrilled on the rare occasion when it happens.

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29. You’re Avoiding Birthday Celebrations

You want quiet birthdays now. In fact, you have even deleted your birthday from your Facebook timeline so friends’ well wishes won’t remind you.

30. You’re Succumbing to “Witching Hours”

You go out with friends on a weeknight and find yourself continually checking your watch so it doesn’t get too late. “When did this start to be a problem?” you ask yourself. That’s a bit depressing, isn’t it?

31. You’re Trying to Figure out Popular Texting Acronyms

You are unsure about the meanings of words and those little abbreviations that keep popping up in texts from people just a few years younger than you. And you’re talking about work stuff while they are talking about the latest concert or road trip.

32. You’re Trying to Recapture Your Youth and it’s not Pretty

You are feeling old and so you go on a rampage of one-night stands and other wild things you did in college. And then you realize you have to break things off with several of those “stands” who got a little too clingy. It’s less easy than it used to be. And you are starting to think that taking your clothes off isn’t nearly as fun as it used to be.

33. You’re Finally Hit With the “How Time Flies” Truth

You begin to talk about the fun times when you were in college, and then you realize that those times were a good 5 years ago. And this is further driven home by receiving alumni mailings with requests for donations from your college.

34. You’re Looking at a Scary Email

The worst thing of all? You get that 10-year high school reunion notification in your email. “How did this happen?” And you begin to research the prices of Botox and liposuction, hoping you can save enough for them before that reunion date.

If you are experiencing even half of these situations, you too are facing that quarter-life crisis. Maybe there needs to be a club or organization of sorts – you know, like an AARP for us 20-somethings in crisis. I, for one, could use a little help with this whole adjusting-to-real-adulthood thing.

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Last Updated on March 25, 2020

How to Crush Your Lack of Motivation and Always Stay Motivated

How to Crush Your Lack of Motivation and Always Stay Motivated

How many times have you not achieved your goals and let yourself down due to your lack of motivation? When you’re not wallowing in sadness and self-pity, you are too busy procrastinating till you can’t anymore and before you know it, you are part of vicious cycle of anxiety and stress.

Whether it’s losing weight or bringing your business to fruition – motivation is essential for growth and success in every sphere of our lives.

That said, it is not easy staying motivated. In order to constantly stay motivated, you need to take ownership of your life and consciously make efforts in that direction.

Well, it’s never too late to take matters in your hands and change the course of your life. Here are 11 effective ways to crush your lack of motivation and always stay motivated:

1. Write Your Goals

The power of writing goals down has always been underestimated. Why write when you can remember, right? Wrong.

Our thoughts are all over the place and the first step to achieve your goals is to organize your thoughts. So, write your goals down, however big or small they might be. Make them as specific as possible and assign deadlines to each of them.

As you write them down and revisit them regularly, they get further drilled in your head, taking you closer to your goals. Doing this small exercise helps you to remain focused, motivated and lets you track your progress with ease.

Start today – take to your laptop or a diary and get down to writing what you wish to achieve in life.

2. Beat Procrastination

Your lack of motivation and procrastination go hand in hand. Every time you procrastinate, your motivation levels take a greater hit. The only way to bring an end to this loop is to stop procrastinating.

Next time you find yourself putting off something for ‘later’, stop and assess the reasons behind it. Get to the root of the cause and eliminate it in order to overcome this poor habit of procrastinating which is sabotaging your life and mental health.

Take a look at this guide and learn how to beat procrastination:

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What Is Procrastination (And the Complete Guide to Stop Procrastinating)

When you finally overcome procrastination, you will realize the positive impact it has on your mood and motivation levels.

3. Celebrate Small Wins

In the quest to achieve the bigger goals in life, we often forget to celebrate the smaller wins along the way. An achievement is an achievement – be it big or small, it deserves to be acknowledged and celebrated.

Finished a project on time? Reward yourself. Managed to run on the treadmill for a good one hour? Pat yourself on the back. Found time to meditate? Celebrate it.

It is these small achievements that reinstate that we are on the right path and take us one step closer to the bigger goals.

So, get into the habit of recognizing and appreciating small wins. You will be surprised to see how this practice helps you stay motivated.

4. Practice Gratitude

It’s easier to whine about what we don’t have rather than counting our blessings. Isn’t it?

Making gratefulness a part of your life is a very important step to retain high motivational levels. It revitalizes our spirits and renews our enthusiasm for life.

So, how do you practice gratitude? For starters, keep a gratitude journal to jot down what you are grateful for, express your gratitude to people you love and spread positivity wherever you go. If you need some inspiration to be thankful for, here it is:

60 Things To Be Thankful For In Life

By doing so, you begin to focus more on what you have rather than what you don’t and that is a great start to stay motivated.

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5. Be Optimistic

Life is not always hunky dory. There will be bad days when things aren’t going in your favor, when you feel lost and all you want to do is give up.

At such times, instead of letting negativity take over your life, adopt an optimistic approach to life. Quit overthinking, ask the right questions and focus on finding solutions.

Yes, there will be hurdles along the way but if you hang on to positive affirmations and hopes, the journey will be a lot smoother. So, with every passing day, sow the seeds of positivity and you are sure to build a positive environment around you.

6. Don’t Dwell on the Past

A lot of times, our lack of motivation stems from the habit of dwelling on the past. This gives rise to fear and regrets, preventing us from making progress in the present day.

Dwelling on the past is nothing but a waste of time. Understand that the past is long gone, and you cannot do anything to change that.

What you can do is make your present day worthwhile. Instead of looking back and having regrets, learn from your mistakes, forgive yourself and move on.

So, the next time you find your mind wandering off to the past, be determined to change the way you think and consciously concentrate on living in the present. This guide can help you:

10 Simple Steps To Let Go Of The Past

7. Face your Fears

You can never find motivation where there is fear. Identify the fear that is pulling you back and tackle it.

If you don’t face your fear head on, you cannot expect to conquer it and renew your motivation.

Ask yourself: What is stopping you? What are you scared of?

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Once you accept your fear, you can work on an action plan and think of solutions to overcome it. This article will give you some effective tips on conquering your fears:

How to Overcome Your Irrational Fears (That Stop You from Succeeding)

Seek external help if required but don’t choose to turn a blind eye over your fears – it will only aggravate matters.

8. Visualize your Success

You must have heard the famous quote, ‘see it to believe it’. That is exactly what visualization is about.

One of the most effective self-motivation techniques, visualizing the process to your desired outcome helps you move in a positive direction and achieve your goal.

Close your eyes and focus all your energies on the minutest of details that will take you where you want to reach. Doing this exercise everyday inspires you to keep going and not lose hope. The vision of attaining success will drive you to do better while instilling belief and confidence.

9. Find Inspiration

Can’t seem to find inspiration inwards? Don’t panic. There are plenty of external sources to gain inspiration from.

From motivational books and quotes to speeches, films and apps – it is a good idea to take help from motivational material to rekindle your spirits and regain your motivation.

Everyone is wired differently. For instance, a self-help book might work for your friend, but it might do nothing to move you. So, find what inspires you and turn to it when you are in desperate need for motivation.

Finding inspiration externally fills you with hope and sometimes that is all you need.

10. Enjoy Downtime

You are clearly exhausted with all the running you’re doing in life. So much, that you don’t even have time to stop and think what’s causing you so much unhappiness. All you know is that you are lacking motivation and everyday seems to have become a struggle.

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Now, that’s certainly not how you should live the rest of your life.

You need to schedule downtime for yourself, relax and give your mind and body some rest. Take a vacation, indulge in hobbies, meet some friends, put your hair down and stop with all the overthinking. It is important to do things that make you happy in order to think clearly and stay motivated.

11. Meditate Regularly

Meditation lets you take control of your mind. It improves focus and concentration while helping you relax.

Whenever you have had a tough day or find your thoughts going places, the best way to calm yourself down is by closing your eyes and meditating. It helps you to remove all the unnecessary frills in life and keeps you on the right track.

Include meditation in your daily schedule and you are sure to see an improvement in your productivity and motivation.

The Bottom Line

Practicing these simple exercises isn’t the tough part, what’s tough is religiously doing them every day.

However, don’t expect to get rid of your lack of motivation overnight. There will still be days when you will be low on energy but by making these conscious efforts to stay motivated, you are sure to see a vast change in your perspective and your response to bad days.

So, start today and be committed to making a positive change in your life.

More Tips About Staying Motivated

Featured photo credit: Sonnie Hiles via unsplash.com

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