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34 Signs That You’re Having A Quarter-Life Crisis

34 Signs That You’re Having A Quarter-Life Crisis

Both my parents had mid-life crises. I witnessed them first-hand because they were just a few years ago while I was in college. They both handled them differently. My dad decided that he wanted to be “young and virile,” so he joined a gym, ate lots of salads, and I think he even had a fling or two.

My mom decided that her life had become meaningless. Her job was not fulfilling, she had an empty nest, and she wanted to “find” herself again. So she went back to school and became a paralegal.

They have made it through their crises and are now settled into comfortable lives, enjoying their post-children years. I, however, am not so settled. All of a sudden, I have hit a crisis – a quarter-life crisis that I didn’t see coming and that I didn’t even know existed on this life journey.

If you are 20-something and experiencing these symptoms, you share my crisis.

1. You’re Turning at Least 25 This Year

Somehow, it’s a horrible milestone — it’s at least halfway to 30, and we know how bad 30 looks. Tiny fine lines will appear. Our parents will be asking when we are going to settle down, get married, and buy a house. Yikes!

2. You’re Wrestling With the Meaning of Adulthood

Is 25 an adult, really? Can you still have just some of the immaturity of 20? Maybe call up your college buddies, take a road trip, and get some crazy tattoos in a sleazy Mexican parlor? Then you start to worry about adult things like safety and infections and you realize that your youth has departed.

3. You’re Fudging on Your Age

You tell that cute college guy or gal you meet in a bar that you are only 22. I mean really, what’s 3 years or so? You can tell yourself that you really “feel” 22, and that age is just an attitude anyway. Nice try.

4. You’re Not Relating to Your Favorite Songs Anymore

Song lyrics are speaking to you. “I’m not a girl, not yet a woman” comes to mind. Except that you were singing that in college, not now. Now the lyrics need to be “I’m a woman, but can I still act like a girl?”

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5. Your Mirror is Rebelling When You Drink

A night of drinking means a full day of bad hair, dark circles, and an avoidance of all spicy smells. Fond memories of all-night binges are just those – fond memories.

6. You’re Seeing an Early Sun on Saturday Morning

You are suddenly getting up early on Saturday morning to clean, do laundry, and run important errands. These things have suddenly up-ticked on your priority list, along with daily planners and appointment reminders.

7. Your Mind Allows the Dreaded “M” Word to Creep In

Getting into a relationship comes with new fears. Will the other person begin to think long-term? Is this one it? To even hold a thought of marriage is something that proves you are now an adult.

8. You’re Skipping the Frozen Food Aisles

You find yourself shopping around the outer edges of the grocery store where all the fresh foods are housed, because health is becoming more important. And you are actually using pots and pans and a stove.

9. You’re Beginning to Think and Sound Like Your Parents

You are the one watching teenage antics and commenting on how immature they are or becoming annoyed with a child having a temper tantrum in a store aisle. God, you are beginning to sound like your parents.

10. You’re Beginning to Worry About What the Neighbors Think

You decide to clean up the yard even though you are only renting, and you actually go buy some plants and put them in the ground. What’s more, you become a responsible pet owner and actually take those little baggies with you when you go for a walk.

11. You’re Beginning to Use Adult Language And Standards

You’ve raised your standards about who you hang with and begin to look for networking opportunities – wow, even the word “networking” is scary.

12. You’re Beginning to Let Comfort Trump Style

You find yourself looking at more sensible shoes at the store, especially for work – how did this happen? And you watch younger kids just romping around in those 6-inch, pointy-toed things without even a worry about falling or getting a bunion.

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13. You’re Beginning to See New Meaning in Dr. Seuss

You are beginning to see deeper meaning in those Dr. Seuss books that you occasionally read to your nieces and nephews, and somehow the fun of them is all gone.

14. Your Purchases are Beginning to Change

You forego buying new clothes because you have to get a new vacuum cleaner. And you buy an iron.

15. You’re Dreading Some of Those Family Holidays

You go to the huge family holiday meal and all of the older relatives are asking when you are going to settle down. In between descriptions of her paralegal courses, your mother makes hints about how she wants to be a grandmother. You suddenly don’t feel well and leave early. Home alone with the TV is better than this.

16. You’re Losing Your Spontaneity

You are seriously ready to turn down a long overseas jaunt to see the world in order to keep your career on track. Wouldn’t even have been a contest 4 years ago.

17. You’re Developing an Appreciation for Your Parents

You actually start to feel some guilt about how you treated your parents as a teenager. Now that’s a maturity level that has really crept up. These thoughts usually come up when you are cleaning up after your roommate who can’t seem to wash a dish or put a new toilet paper roll on.

18. You’re No Longer Allowed to be Helpless

You realize that you’ll never be able to fake being helpless again, unless it is asking your mother for a recipe or how to get a stain out of the rug.

19. You’re on Your Own with the IRS

You are doing your own taxes like a real grownup, and it’s not nice. And you actually read those instructions that come with the tax forms.

20. You’re Worrying More About Those Incisors

You are no longer avoiding the dentist but are making regular appointments for cleanings and checkups.

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21. You’re Making Decisions Like Adults Do

You actually think about the pros and cons of something before doing it. And you are making decisions that would make your parents happy. Where did all of that wild abandon go?

22. You’re Worried When You are Overdrawn

You realize that you should have paid far more attention to that personal finance course you had. And you understand that budgets are really not for “wimps.”

23. You’re Actually Checking Your Credit Card Balance

You are no longer making those impulse buys that rack up your credit card debt. Wow, this would never have happened 4 years ago!

24. You’re Losing the Old Gang

Friends are starting to move away – close friends, good friends. And you are not prepared to really deal with that.

25. You’re Taking Work Seriously

You begin to think of your job as a career and start looking at the long-term future. And you are putting money into a 401K. Secretly, you are longing for days gone by when you had those part-time jobs that you could just quit because there were always other ones you could find.

26. You’re Resenting the Freedom Others Have

You look at friends who are traveling all the time and don’t feel happy for them anymore, as you sit at your desk waiting for that two-week annual vacation.

27. You’re Becoming the Boring One

You are asking your roommates to keep it down after 10 p.m. because you have an early meeting in the morning. And before you go to bed, you actually watch the news and weather reports.

28. You’re Thrilled to Get “Carded”

You are no longer “carded” at bars and liquor stores, and you are scrutinizing your face in mirrors, trying to figure out how you look over 21 now. You are absolutely thrilled on the rare occasion when it happens.

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29. You’re Avoiding Birthday Celebrations

You want quiet birthdays now. In fact, you have even deleted your birthday from your Facebook timeline so friends’ well wishes won’t remind you.

30. You’re Succumbing to “Witching Hours”

You go out with friends on a weeknight and find yourself continually checking your watch so it doesn’t get too late. “When did this start to be a problem?” you ask yourself. That’s a bit depressing, isn’t it?

31. You’re Trying to Figure out Popular Texting Acronyms

You are unsure about the meanings of words and those little abbreviations that keep popping up in texts from people just a few years younger than you. And you’re talking about work stuff while they are talking about the latest concert or road trip.

32. You’re Trying to Recapture Your Youth and it’s not Pretty

You are feeling old and so you go on a rampage of one-night stands and other wild things you did in college. And then you realize you have to break things off with several of those “stands” who got a little too clingy. It’s less easy than it used to be. And you are starting to think that taking your clothes off isn’t nearly as fun as it used to be.

33. You’re Finally Hit With the “How Time Flies” Truth

You begin to talk about the fun times when you were in college, and then you realize that those times were a good 5 years ago. And this is further driven home by receiving alumni mailings with requests for donations from your college.

34. You’re Looking at a Scary Email

The worst thing of all? You get that 10-year high school reunion notification in your email. “How did this happen?” And you begin to research the prices of Botox and liposuction, hoping you can save enough for them before that reunion date.

If you are experiencing even half of these situations, you too are facing that quarter-life crisis. Maybe there needs to be a club or organization of sorts – you know, like an AARP for us 20-somethings in crisis. I, for one, could use a little help with this whole adjusting-to-real-adulthood thing.

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Last Updated on September 20, 2018

7 Powerful Questions To Find Out What You Want To Do With Your Life

7 Powerful Questions To Find Out What You Want To Do With Your Life

What do I want to do with my life? It’s a question all of us think about at one point or another.

For some, the answer comes easily. For others, it takes a lifetime to figure out.

It’s easy to just go through the motions and continue to do what’s comfortable and familiar. But for those of you who seek fulfillment, who want to do more, these questions will help you paint a clearer picture of what you want to do with your life.

1. What are the things I’m most passionate about?

The first step to living a more fulfilling life is to think about the things that you’re passionate about.

What do you love? What fulfills you? What “work” do you do that doesn’t feel like work? Maybe you enjoy writing, maybe you love working with animals or maybe you have a knack for photography.

The point is, figure out what you love doing, then do more of it.

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2. What are my greatest accomplishments in life so far?

Think about your past experiences and the things in your life you’re most proud of.

How did those accomplishments make you feel? Pretty darn good, right? So why not try and emulate those experiences and feelings?

If you ran a marathon once and loved the feeling you had afterwards, start training for another one. If your child grew up to be a star athlete or musician because of your teachings, then be a coach or mentor for other kids.

Continue to do the things that have been most fulfilling for you.

3. If my life had absolutely no limits, what would I choose to have and what would I choose to do?

Here’s a cool exercise: Think about what you would do if you had no limits.

If you had all the money and time in the world, where would you go? What would you do? Who would you spend time with?

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These answers can help you figure out what you want to do with your life. It doesn’t mean you need millions of dollars to be happy though.

What it does mean is answering these questions will help you set goals to reach certain milestones and create a path toward happiness and fulfillment. Which leads to our next question …

4. What are my goals in life?

Goals are a necessary component to set you up for a happy future. So answer these questions:

Once you figure out the answers to each of these, you’ll have a much better idea of what you should do with your life.

5. Whom do I admire most in the world?

Following the path of successful people can set you up for success.

Think about the people you respect and admire most. What are their best qualities? Why do you respect them? What can you learn from them?

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You’re the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with.[1] So don’t waste your time with people who hold you back from achieving your dreams.

Spend more time with happy, successful, optimistic people and you’ll become one of them.

6. What do I not like to do?

An important part of figuring out what you want to do with your life is honestly assessing what you don’t want to do.

What are the things you despise? What bugs you the most about your current job?

Maybe you hate meetings even though you sit through 6 hours of them every day. If that’s the case, find a job where you can work more independently.

The point is, if you want something to change in your life, you need to take action. Which leads to our final question …

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7. How hard am I willing to work to get what I want?

Great accomplishments never come easy. If you want to do great things with your life, you’re going to have to make a great effort. That will probably mean putting in more hours the average person, getting outside your comfort zone and learning as much as you can to achieve as much as you can.

But here’s the cool part: it’s often the journey that is the most fulfilling part. It’s during these seemingly small, insignificant moments that you’ll often find that “aha” moments that helps you answer the question,

“What do I want to do with my life?”

So take the first step toward improving your life. You won’t regret it.

Featured photo credit: Andrew Ly via unsplash.com

Reference

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