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Have We Discovered A Love Hack That Works? [INFOGRAPHIC]

Have We Discovered A Love Hack That Works? [INFOGRAPHIC]

In this age of social media and text communication, it’s easier than ever to connect with people from all corners of the world. You can talk to people without ever knowing what their voice sounds like or what they even look like.

In 1997, Dr. Arthur Aron conducted a study to see if feelings of intimacy and closeness could be fast-tracked in a lab setting. A classroom of psychology students were divided into pairs and given 36 questions to ask each other. These questions were divided into three 15-question sections, becoming more probing and personal with each section. The idea was that if people shared personal memories, thoughts and feelings with each other, they would feel closeness at an accelerated pace. The 36 questions became a popular exercise for people looking for ways to break the ice during dates or to get closer with their partners.

Dr. Aron sent out a follow up survey seven weeks after the study and found that 57% of students had at least one subsequent conversation, 35% had done something together, and 37% had subsequently sat together in class. Dr. Aron had, essentially, created a love hack.

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This year, Venngage decided to recreate the study with with a 21st century twist: the study would be conducted entirely through text, with no physical indicators.This new study asked 32 participants to ask each other the same 36 questions, but through text message. At the end of the study, participants had the option of exchanging contact information with their partner if they were interested in talking more or meeting in person.

Would people still feel the same level of closeness as in the original study if participants had no physical cues to go by? Is it possible for people to fall in love through words alone?

The results may or may not surprise you. While the majority of participants 50% of participants found it easier to discuss personal topics through text, 53% of participants still preferred offline conversation to online. And while 81% of participants exchanged contact info at the end of the study, 78% of participants did not intend to see their partner again after the study.

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While text can make it easier for more introverted people to open up, most people need to meet a person before they know how they feel about them. In the original study, the relationship between participants was rated closer than the closest relationship in the lives of 30% of similar students. In the new study, however, 16% of participants felt the same level of closeness to their partner as they do to the closest person in their life, 84% felt less close in comparison, and 0% felt more close in comparison.

What can we learn from this? Well, while text can be a great way to chat with someone before deciding if you want to meet them in person, most people need a physical connection with their partner in love. There are things that a person reveals through their facial expressions and physicality that is lost through text communication.

But don’t despair if meeting people in person isn’t your thing! While the number of people who use online dating apps is still in the minority, those numbers are on the rise. According to research done by eHarmony, 38% of couples are expected to meet online in the near future, with that number rising to 70% of couples by 2040. And while most people prefer conducting their romantic lives offline, according to a survey by Skout, 76% of people have  a good friend that they met online but have never met up with in person. So it would seem that people continue to become more and more comfortable with conducting relationships through social media and messaging apps.

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When it comes to love, do what works for you.

This infographic shows the full results of the study:

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                        Featured photo credit: Venngage via infograph.venngage.com

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                        Last Updated on May 28, 2020

                        How to Overcome Boredom

                        How to Overcome Boredom

                        Have you ever been bored? Restless? Fidgety? In need of some inspiration?

                        I have a theory on boredom. I believe that the rate of boredom has increased alongside the pace of technology.

                        If you think about it, technology has provided us with mobile phones, laptops, Ipads, device after device – all to ultimately fix one problem: boredom.

                        What is Boredom?

                        We have become a global nation that feeds on entertainment. We associate ‘living’ with ‘doing’. People now do not know how to sit still, and we feel guilty when we are not doing anything. Today, inactivity has become the ultimate sin.

                        You might not realize it, but boredom stimulates a form of anxiety and stress. It evokes an emotional state that creates frustration and feeds procrastination.

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                        It’s a desire to be ‘doing something’ or to be ‘entertained’ – it’s a desire for sensory stimulation. What it boils down to is a lack of focus.

                        If you think about those times when you’re bored, it’s usually because you did not know what to do. So, indecision also plays a big part.

                        When we are focused on what’s important to us and what we want to achieve, it’s pretty hard to be bored. So, one answer to boredom is to become focused on what you want.

                        Sometimes It’s Good to Be Bored

                        If boredom is a desire for sensory stimulation – then what’s the opposite of that? To be content with no stimulation – in other words – to enjoy stillness.

                        Sometimes, it’s not boredom itself that causes the frustration but the resistance to doing nothing.

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                        Think about it. What would happen if you were to ‘let go’ of the desire to be entertained? You wouldn’t be bored anymore, and you will feel more relaxed!

                        In my experience, it’s often the most obvious, simplistic solutions that are the most powerful in life. So, when you’re bored, the easiest way to combat this is to enjoy it.

                        It may sound weird but think of ‘boredom’ as a form of ‘relaxation’. It’s a break from the constant stimulation that 21st-century living provides – constant TVs, mobile phones, radios, internet, emails, phone calls, etc.

                        Who knows, maybe ‘boredom’ is actually good for us?

                        Next time you’re ‘feeling bored’ instead of feeding the frustration by frantically looking for something to do, maybe you can sit back, relax, and savor the feeling of having nothing to do.

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                        In this article, I’ll share with you my 3-step strategy on how to overcome boredom.

                        3-Step Strategy to Overcome Boredom

                        1. Get Focused

                        Instead of chasing sensory stimulation at random, focus on what’s really important to you. Focusing on something important helps prevent boredom because it forces you to utilize your time productively.

                        You should ask yourself: what would make good use of your time? What could you be doing that would contribute to your major goals in life?

                        Here are a few ideas:

                        • Spend some time in quiet contemplation considering what’s important to you.
                        • Start that creative project you’ve been talking about for the last few weeks.
                        • Brainstorm: think of some ideas for new innovative products or businesses.

                        2. Kill Procrastination

                        Boredom is useful in some ways because it gives you the energy and time to do things. It is only a problem if you let it. But if you use it to motivate yourself to be productive, then you can more easily overcome boredom.

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                        So, the next time you’re bored, why not put this good energy to use by ticking off those things that you have been meaning to get done but have been too busy to finish? This also presents a great time for you to clear your to-do list.

                        Here are some ideas:

                        • Do some exercise.
                        • Read a book.
                        • Learn something new.
                        • Call a friend.
                        • Get creative (draw, paint, sculpt, create music, write).
                        • Do a spring cleaning.
                        • Wash the car.
                        • Renovate the house.
                        • Re-arrange the furniture.
                        • Write your shopping list.
                        • Water the plants.
                        • Walk the dog.
                        • Sort out your mail & email.
                        • De-clutter (clear out that wardrobe).

                        3. Enjoy Boredom

                        If none of the above solutions work, then you can try a different approach. Don’t give in to boredom and instead choose to enjoy it. This doesn’t mean allowing yourself to waste your time being bored. Instead, think of it as your time to relax and re-energize, which will help you be more productive the next time you work.

                        Contrary to popular belief, we don’t need to be constantly doing things to be productive. In fact, research has shown that people are more productive when they take periods of rest to recharge.[1] Taking breaks once in a while helps boost your performance and can help make you feel more motivated.

                        So, take some time to relax. You never know, you might even like it.

                        Final Thoughts

                        Learning how to overcome boredom may be difficult at the beginning, but it can be easier if you make use of some techniques. You can start with my 3-step strategy on how to overcome boredom and work your way from there. So, ready your mind and make use of these tips, and you will be overcoming boredom in no time.

                        More Tips on Overcoming Boredom

                        Featured photo credit: Johnny Cohen via unsplash.com

                        Reference

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