“If you’re ever in a jam, here I am
If you’re ever in a mess, S-O-S
If you ever feel so happy, you land in jail… I’m your bail.
It’s friendship, friendship, just a perfect blendship.
When other friendships have been forgot,
Ours will still be hot.
Lah-dle-ah-dle-ah-dle dig, dig, dig.”
Whenever I think of friendship I think of that Kay Kyser song. It’s happy-making—even just like the thought of friendship itself. I like to imagine a good friend who laughs at your jokes, tells you when there’s spinach in your teeth and who wants the best for you.
“One loyal friend is worth ten-thousand relatives.”
We all know that friendship can make the carnival that is life way more enjoyable. I mean, who wants to go to a carnival alone anyway? Friends make the party worthwhile. Without friends, this party’s a bust. But did you also know that, in addition to the good times and memory making, having friends can also improve your health? Yep. There’s even research to back it up!
What the Experts Discovered
In a recent finding, The National Academy of Sciences states that if we isolate ourselves and remain antisocial we could be harming ourselves.Advertising
“Social isolation increased the risk of inflammation by the same magnitude as physical inactivity in adolescence, and the effect of social isolation on hypertension exceeded that of clinical risk factors such as diabetes in old age.”
The Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, did a study based on previous research, proving that seniors have a longer lifespan if they have more social connections.
According to the Department of Sociology, University of North Carolina, “The effect of social isolation on hypertension risk exceeded the effect of diabetes, a well known risk factor for hypertension at older ages. The associations of social integration with overall obesity are significant in both early and late life and higher social support was associated with lower odds of abdominal and overall obesity in young to mid adulthood.”Advertising
A bunch of folks got together to study the impact of friendship at different stages of our lives. The data came from The National Longitudinal Study of Adolescent to Adult Health (Add Health) to capture adolescence and young adulthood, the National Survey of Midlife Development in the United States (MIDUS) for middle adulthood, and both the Health and Retirement Study (HRS) and the National Social Life, Health, and Aging Project (NSHAP) for late adulthood. As it turns out, we need different things, at different stages.
Kathleen Mullan Harris, James Haar Distinguished Professor at UNC-Chapel Hill found that in early and late adulthood, size matters. Both in the early stages of life and the later, it’s important to have a large social network. But when it comes to that area in the middle, “middle adulthood,” it’s not so much about quantity, it’s more about quality. In regards to mid-life, Science Daily notes, “it’s not the number of social connections that matter, but what those connections provide in terms of social support or strain.”
Science also tells us that people who isolate, have an increased risk of cardiovascular diseases and a compromised immune response to viral infections.Advertising
Maybe now would be a good time to check out some Meetups, enroll in an art class, make new friends. Who knows? Maybe you’ll click with someone new and that new friend will be with you through thick and thin. It might also be a good time to call up that old pal and plan that lunch. You could be mutual lifesavers.
“There is nothing better than a friend, unless it is a friend with chocolate.”
Last Updated on January 21, 2020
How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them
If I was a super hero I’d want my super power to be the ability to motivate everyone around me. Think of how many problems you could solve just by being able to motivate people towards their goals. You wouldn’t be frustrated by lazy co-workers. You wouldn’t be mad at your partner for wasting the weekend in front of the TV. Also, the more people around you are motivated toward their dreams, the more you can capitalize off their successes.
Being able to motivate people is key to your success at work, at home, and in the future because no one can achieve anything alone. We all need the help of others.
So, how to motivate people? Here are 7 ways to motivate others even you can do.
Most people start out trying to motivate someone by giving them a lengthy speech, but this rarely works because motivation has to start inside others. The best way to motivate others is to start by listening to what they want to do. Find out what the person’s goals and dreams are. If it’s something you want to encourage, then continue through these steps.
2. Ask Open-Ended Questions
Open-ended questions are the best way to figure out what someone’s dreams are. If you can’t think of anything to ask, start with, “What have you always wanted to do?”
“Why do you want to do that?”
“What makes you so excited about it?”
“How long has that been your dream?”
You need this information the help you with the following steps.
This is the most important step, because starting a dream is scary. People are so scared they will fail or look stupid, many never try to reach their goals, so this is where you come in. You must encourage them. Say things like, “I think you will be great at that.” Better yet, say, “I think your skills in X will help you succeed.” For example if you have a friend who wants to own a pet store, say, “You are so great with animals, I think you will be excellent at running a pet store.”
4. Ask About What the First Step Will Be
After you’ve encouraged them, find how they will start. If they don’t know, you can make suggestions, but it’s better to let the person figure out the first step themselves so they can be committed to the process.
This is the most fun step, because you can dream about success. Say things like, “Wouldn’t it be cool if your business took off, and you didn’t have to work at that job you hate?” By allowing others to dream, you solidify the motivation in place and connect their dreams to a future reality.
6. Ask How You Can Help
Most of the time, others won’t need anything from you, but it’s always good to offer. Just letting the person know you’re there will help motivate them to start. And, who knows, maybe your skills can help.
7. Follow Up
Periodically, over the course of the next year, ask them how their goal is going. This way you can find out what progress has been made. You may need to do the seven steps again, or they may need motivation in another area of their life.
By following these seven steps, you’ll be able to encourage the people around you to achieve their dreams and goals. In return, you’ll be more passionate about getting to your goals, you’ll be surrounded by successful people, and others will want to help you reach your dreams …
Oh, and you’ll become a motivational super hero. Time to get a cape!
More on Motivation
- Why Is Internal Motivation So Powerful (And How to Find It)
- 9 Types of Motivation That Make It Possible to Reach Your Dreams
- No Motivation? 7 Great Ways To Overcome Loss Of Motivation
Featured photo credit: Thought Catalog via unsplash.com