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10 Irritating Beliefs That Picky Eaters Put Up With

10 Irritating Beliefs That Picky Eaters Put Up With

It’s a food thing. You know how everyone talks about food all the time? When people eat out, food is a major topic. For picky eaters, this is really piling on the pain. Now, if you are a picky eater, or you have a loved one who has this minor problem, here are 10 things people commonly think about picky eaters. It is time to give them a chance to explain a few things.

“I’m a really picky eater.” — Emma Roberts

1. They are just seeking attention

Many people are convinced that picky eaters are just trying to get more attention. The reality is quite different, as most picky eaters would rather curl up and die rather than to have to go through agonizing menu choices.

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2. They are just like children

You know how we always lump picky eaters in the problem child category? We have no tolerance for adult picky eaters. They shudder when they think of the confrontational parenting saying “If you don’t eat your broccoli, there is no dessert,” as this was a constant refrain when they were kids. Now as adults, they just want a little more understanding about their food choices. Is that too much to ask?

3. They are suffering from a disorder

Researchers at Duke University have now established that very picky eating may actually be a disorder which has been labelled as a selective eating disorder. Basically, picky eaters are just experiencing food, tastes, and other sensations differently from the rest of the population. Why does every quirk of human behavior have to be labelled as a disorder?

4. They do not love food at all

Picky eaters really do like their food. They are just being highly selective. We all do this. Add in a few cultural and environmental factors and you have national delicacies which may be viewed as disgusting by other nations. When we eat, our taste buds relay to the part of the brain (the gustatory cortex) whether the flavor is acceptable or not.

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5. They love telling us about their preferences

Most picky eaters I know would prefer to be swallowed up rather than have to explain why they are not eating a certain part of the dish. They also hate having to justify their choices on the menu and feel embarrassed when they have to specify that they want no sugar, salt, gluten, lactose, or meat. Leaving food untouched is embarrssing for them.

6. They were spoiled as children

Many people think that picky eaters were just allowed to pick and choose as youngsters. The opposite may be true because they were more likely to have been forced to try things or cajoled into taking two bites of everything — far from being spoiled. Now they enjoy nothing more than having a nice quiet meal at home, with no one offering advice or making unhelpful comments on balanced diets. What bliss!

7. They like being invited out to eat

Actually they do not, because the question, “What would you like to eat?” is a loaded one. There are undertones of:

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  • “The last time she came to eat, she turned up her nose at everything.”
  • “He is such a difficult person and is never satisfied.”
  • “She never compliments me on my cooking.”
  • “I bet he will ask for some rare vegetable, dressing, or spice which we just don’t have.”

Now you know why picky eaters love having scrambled eggs on toast at home alone. Greta Garbo may have been a picky eater in her desire to be left alone, but there may have been another reason!

“There is no one who would have me – I can’t cook.” – Greta Garbo

8. They love everything served on one plate

Picky eaters find this a nightmare. Their ideal is a DIY salad where every ingredient is in separate little bowls and everyone can add what they like. Now, that is democratic eating. If you invite a picky eater, try doing this. It will be love at first sight!

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9. They just can’t appreciate good cooking

In a society obsessed with good food, cookery TV shows, and recipes on practically every page of the web, it is no wonder that picky eaters are regarded with distaste (pardon the pun!). They are stigmatized as not being able to boil an egg. People assume they have no cooking skills and very few taste buds. But research is now pointing to the fact that they may well have actually more taste buds, which may mean their sense of taste is hypersensitive. They yearn for those simpler tastes of French fries, pizza, peanut butter, and hamburgers.

10. They are so difficult to please

If the charming hosts thought for a moment, they would come up with lots of ideas which would please even the pickiest of eaters. Simple is best, so if you decide to invite them, bear in mind that spicy foods are most likely out. Foods like lasagna, with its many layers and textures, might also prove difficult. Fruit salad is usually a safe choice, while boiled chicken with the option of gravy is usually popular — except for vegetarians, of course.

Look at these recipes for some more great ideas if your guests are picky eaters.

The best solution of all is to organize a pot luck supper. Coordinate this by email so that you do not end up with five fruit salads and one pasta dish. Bon appetit!

Featured photo credit: Eating chocolate brownie/Leonid Mamchenkov via flickr.com

More by this author

Robert Locke

Author of Ziger the Tiger Stories, a health enthusiast specializing in relationships, life improvement and mental health.

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Last Updated on December 17, 2018

Why You Think You’re Not Good Enough and How To Believe in Yourself

Why You Think You’re Not Good Enough and How To Believe in Yourself

Have you ever wanted to say something at work, but a little voice of doubt crept in and said, “what if you are wrong”?

Maybe you wanted to apply for that promotion or ask that special someone on a date, but something kept you from taking action. When you think you’re not good enough, you tend to fear the outcome and lack faith in your abilities. That is why it is vital you discover how to believe in yourself so you can accomplish your goals and create your dream life.

Whatever your situation, the fears and self-doubt your false beliefs create will always stop you in your tracks. Identifying the beliefs that cause you to sabotage your life is the first step to removing them.

Self-doubt causes inaction, and inaction leads to regret. When you are not following your passion and living your dream life, you are left with a lot of questions:

  • What if I took a chance on myself?
  • Could I have had a better life if I took more risks?
  • Am I be satisfied with the legacy I am leaving behind?
  • What could I have accomplished if I did not settle for less?

So why would you think you’re not good enough?

1. Parenting

The perception you have of yourself is based on your past experiences. There are studies that show children mimic everything from their parents ability to regulate emotions, to their parents belief about money.[1]

I have had clients who did not believe they were good enough because they did not receive any positive reinforcement as a child. When they were young, their parents were extremely overprotective.

Think of your childhood challenges like dragons you had to slay. Each obstacle you overcame was another dragon you successfully removed from your life. As you slay more dragons, your self-esteem and confidence increase. When someone has overprotective parents, their parents end up slaying the dragons.

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As a result, the child builds more confidence in their parent’s abilities, while still doubting their own.

If you are never encouraged to slay your own dragons, you start to doubt whether you can. It is only natural for a child to conclude their parents are always helping them because they think they need it. This child ages into an adult who still believes they are not good enough. They seek the help and confirmation of others, and they rarely stand-up to opposition.

Solution: Slay Your Dragons!

If you want to believe in yourself, you are going to have to take steps to rebuild your trust in yourself. Start by keeping your word to others and arriving on-time. By showing yourself that others can (and do) trust you, you are going to feel more comfortable trusting yourself.

As you move onto larger and more challenging tasks, you have built a foundation of trust in your ability to keep your word. Next, you are going to want to reclaim your sword from others. At first, you may want to confide in whoever it is currently slaying your dragons.

Understand if it is your parent or someone who loves you, they want the best for you and mean well. You are simply going to tell them that you want to do the work, and will ask them for their thoughts in the planning phase. Feel free to check in with them and give them updates on your progress, while making sure they understand you are wanting to do the work yourself.

Then when the task is completed, let them know so you can celebrate together. Now that you have slayed your own dragon, you can start to reclaim your confidence. By you utilizing them as your guide, you get the added bonus of someone you respect and admire, telling you how amazing you are.

Think of it like a symbolic passing of the torch. Now, you are both dragon slayers. Which means all the positive attributes you attributed to them slaying your dragons, now belong to you.

2. Over-Exaggerating and Oversimplifying

Your past experiences may involve you or someone close to you failing. When you experience failure, you can lose your desire to continue. This has less to do with whether you are brave or scared, and more to do with the fact that your mind does not like failure.

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No one enjoys participating in events in which they under-perform. Outside of the usual reasons of embarrassment, feelings of inadequacy, and fear of failure – it is simply not fun.

Who wants to play baseball if they strikeout every time it is their turn? Would you enjoy singing in front of an audience if you were booed off the stage every time you performed? I could go on, but I think you get the point.

The thing about those two examples is no one really strikes out “every” at-bat. It is also unlikely someone could be booed off the stage “every time” they performed in-front of an audience.

What ends up happening is you oversimplify and exaggerate your past experiences and then your mind believes you. If you believe you are not good enough to ask someone on a date because they “always” tell you no, then do not be surprised you never muster the courage to do so.

If you want to overcome these feelings of inadequacy, start by changing your beliefs. This exercise does not need to be complicated. If you believe you strikeout every time it is your turn, I want to you to go to a batting cage and keep swinging until you hit the baseball.

When you experience success, I want you to take a mental note, write it down, or have someone video it. This is your proof that you do not always strike out. Then, whenever your belief that you are not good enough resurfaces, you are going to replay that video.

Regardless of the situation, you can find a successful experience that you are overlooking.

Solution: Read About the Failures of Others

It sounds a little crazy, I know, but reading about the failures of other successful people will improve your confidence. In a study conducted by Columbia University, they found that teaching students about the failures of great scientists encouraged them to do better.[2]

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When you are battling fear and self-doubt, you tend to over-exaggerate the abilities of others and diminish your own by comparison. You start to believe the successful are successful because they are courageous risk-takers, who do not take no for an answer. You tell yourself, they are meant to succeed, while you on the other hand are not.

When you are able to relate to the successful, you start to realize they have the same struggles and challenges you do. The only difference is they kept going.

Now it is not a question of whether you can succeed, it is a question of whether you want to succeed.

3. Undervalue Yourself

What is the main difference between someone who believes they are good enough and someone who does not? The person who believes they are good enough understands they are a person of value.

What I mean by this is if you do not believe you are worth being listened to, you will not have anything to say. If you do not believe you are good enough to be respected and treated as such, you will accept and rationalize all kinds of mistreatment.

There is an old saying that we are treated as we allow ourselves to be treated. When someone has the confidence and self-esteem that commands respect, they will not accept being treated any kind of way. However, if someone does not see themselves as worthy, they will remain in toxic situations because they do not believe anything better is on the horizon.

Dr. Jennifer Crocker, who worked on a series of self-esteem studies, found in her latest research that:[3]

“College students who based their self-worth on external sources–including appearance, approval from others and even their academic performance–reported more stress, anger, academic problems, relationship conflicts, and had higher levels of drug and alcohol use and symptoms of eating disorders”

Solution: Internalize Your Self-Worth

Instead of valuing yourself based on the awards, recognition, and accolades of others, you need to search internally. By basing your perception of yourself on your core values, you can regain control over self-image.

Instead of focusing on things that are outside of control, keep your mind on what it is that makes you special. You are not defined by your job, relationships, religion, or education. Rather, you are defined by the manner in which you participate in these things. You may be a creative, hard-working, and compassionate person; and that shows up in every thing you do.

Understand that you do not need to be creative, hard-working, and compassionate all the time to consider yourself these things. You are not trying to be perfect, but you are trying to connect with your true self.

By understanding the similarities in which you tackle objectives, you will build a consistent and powerful self-worth that stands apart from external confirmation.

Final Thoughts

Do not allow your past experiences do dictate your future success. You do not want to look back on your life and have a lot of questions and regrets.

Build trust in yourself by taking action today. This will help you build the confidence you need to believe in yourself and your ability to become the champion of your life.

More Inspiration About Motivation

Featured photo credit: Riccardo Mion via unsplash.com

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Reference

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