Advertising
Advertising

Science Says People Who Are Moody Are Not Fragile, But More Adaptable

Science Says People Who Are Moody Are Not Fragile, But More Adaptable

Moody people are often thought as difficult people to deal with. Also, there is a sneaking suspicion that they are just being childish and they are mentally fragile.

Women get a raw deal when their bad moods are noticed much more than men, as pointed out in Dr. Julie Holland’s book Moody Bitches. She argues convincingly that women’s moods are a strength, rather than a weakness. A new study from University College of London recently appearing in the Trends in Cognitive Sciences journal also confirms that moodiness is not a bad thing at all and may actually have a biological purpose.

Moods make us more adaptable

The main findings in the UCL study, led by Dr. Eran Eldar, suggest that moods have had an important role in helping us to adapt as we evolved. They are distinct advantages.

Advertising

“It’s long been known that mood biases our judgments and perceptions, but this effect has usually been regarded as irrational or disadvantageous.” – Dr. Eran Eldar.

Eldar’s work indicates that moods are a very useful tool in helping us to adapt to our surroundings. They provide the basis for useful learning experiences and prepare us better when we are faced with similar situations in the future.

Moods will change our behavior

When we are in a good mood, the positive glow affects our behavior and makes us more adaptable. An example is a stock trader who gains from an investment. His good mood now means he is more prepared to take risks which will help to respond more quickly to a rising market.

Advertising

We can think of it rather like the good mood becoming more a permanent state as the rewards gain in value. But they are also interconnected so we can see them having a ripple effect as we gain success in skills, wealth and social status, not to mention success in finding a soulmate.

“This effect of mood should be useful whenever different sources of reward are interconnected or possess an underlying momentum.” – Dr.Eran Eldar

Bad moods will be equally effective in the diminishing returns and convince us that outcomes are worse than they really are. How many times have we said to ourselves, “I knew this was going to happen.” Our expectations are an exact match of all the punishment and negative consequences raining down on us from a merciless sky. In addition, negative moods really can affect our decision making and reasoning.

Advertising

More studies in this area may lead to a better understanding of depressive and bipolar disorders.

Moods can help us adapt to change

In our evolutionary past, we had to adapt to changes in the seasons and the environment. Moods are really like an evolutionary relic. They reflect how early humans had to adapt to finding food when certain meteorological and seasonal changes were crucial to survival.

Warmer temperatures and more available food were positive factors which reinforced the rewards and chances of survival. Winter and colder temperatures were representative of declining rewards and resulted in different behavior, such as having to hibernate to survive and, of course, a lower mood.

Advertising

Moods can be reinforced by our thoughts

Another study carried out among bipolar students at the University of Lancaster in the UK, found that positive and negative thoughts were important behavior indicators. The positive thoughts such as repeating a mantra which states that you will indeed do well were influencing moods and subsequent behavior. When the negative thoughts such as fear of having a breakdown were activated, behavior and mood went into a downward spiral. Neutral thoughts, such as acknowledging that you have a lot on your plate, were not nearly as influential in determining mood.

Of course, moods are not the whole answer, fortunately. They are just one element in a complex web of tangled elements such as mind, body, diet, exercise, weather, and social relationships. The important lesson from all this is to realize how moods can help us to adapt to changes more easily. They always have and they always will.

“You cannot find peace by avoiding life.” – Virginia Woolf

More by this author

Robert Locke

Author of Ziger the Tiger Stories, a health enthusiast specializing in relationships, life improvement and mental health.

10 Reasons Why People Are Unmotivated (And How to Be Motivated) 12 Secrets To a Super Productive Meeting You Should Know Work Smarter, Not Harder: 12 Smart Ways to Be More Productive What Your Fear of Being Alone Is Really About and How to Get over It 10 Simple Morning Exercises That Will Make You Feel Great All Day

Trending in Communication

1 5 Powerful Ways for Building Fulfilling Relationships 2 How a Lack of Communication Can Cost Your Career 3 What Makes People Happy? 20 Secrets of “Always Happy” People 4 How to Find Happiness in Your Everyday Life 5 What Is Self Awareness (And How to Increase Yours)

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on October 16, 2019

5 Powerful Ways for Building Fulfilling Relationships

5 Powerful Ways for Building Fulfilling Relationships

We all have relationships. We have acquaintances, relatives, colleagues, neighbors and friends. However, for a large percentage of us, many of these relationships are not fulfilling.

They are unfulfilling because they lack real strength; and they lack real strength because they lack real depth.

Unfortunately, in today’s society, we tend to have shallow, superficial relationships with others, and it’s extremely hard for this kind of relationships to provide anything more than faint satisfaction.

I’d like to show you, based on my experience as a communication and confidence coach, how you can add a significant amount of depth, and thus strength, to your relationships and make your social life a whole lot more meaningful.

Here’re 5 simple yet powerful ways for meaningful relationships building:

1. Meet More People

This is an apparent paradox, but the quality of the people you meet has considerably to do with the quantity of people you meet.

Advertising

If you don’t know a lot of people and you barely meet one or two new people every season of the year, considering the variety of individuals out there, you won’t meet very often people who are a good match with you in terms of personality, interests and values.

And since this natural match plays a huge part in building strong relationships, you’ll just as seldom have the opportunity to develop strong relationships.

Conversely, if you go out a lot, you meet a lot of new people and you constantly expand your social circle, you’re much more likely to meet people you match up well with, and these people have a tremendous potential to become good friends, reliable partners, etc.

This is why it’s important to meet more people.

2. Talk about the Things That Matter To You

A relationship becomes the strongest when two people discover they believe in the same things and have similar interests. It’s these commonalities regarding values and interests that create the strongest emotional connection.

I’ve noticed that many people keep conversations shallow. They talk about trivial stuff such as the weather, what’s on TV, the lives of various movie stars, but they rarely talk about what really matters to them in life. This is a mistake from my perspective, because it’s the perfect method for a relationship to not develop.

Advertising

Talk about the things that truly matter to you and give others a chance to know what you care about and what you believe in. If they believe in the same things and they care about the same things, they’ll eagerly let you know. Thus you’ll find meaningful common ground and you’ll feel more connected.

3. Express Vulnerability

Many people try to come off as perfect. They don’t talk about their failures, they hide their shortcomings and they never say anything that could embarrass them.

This is all just a facade though. You may appear perfect to some, but you know you’re not perfect and they know that too. You’re only human and humans have flaws.

However, by hiding your flaws, what you do succeed in is appearing cold and impersonal. You seem like a marble statue rather than a real person. And this makes it very hard for anyone to connect with you emotionally.

Humans connect with other humans, not with ideals. Keep this in mind and don’t be afraid to let your vulnerability and your humanity show. This is what takes a relationship to the next level.

Take a look at this article and find out Why Showing Vulnerability Actually Proves Your Strength.

Advertising

4. Have Integrity

Integrity, as I see it, is the alignment between your thoughts, your words and your actions. When you say what you think and you do what you said you’ll do, you have integrity.

This is a crucial trait because if you have integrity, people can trust you. They can trust you to give them an honest feedback, even when it’s hard to shallow, and they can trust you to keep your promises.

This trust is one of the central pillars of a strong relationship, both in your personal and your professional life. So, as challenging as it can be sometimes, always try to have integrity.

Be honest with the people around you, even when this will initially hurt them. It’s more important for them to trust you than to not feel hurt. And always do what you promised. Even better, think twice before you promise anything, and only promise what you really can and you are willing to do.

5. Be There for Others

Another central pillar of strong relationships is support. Connections between people grow sturdy if they can rely on each other for support when it’s needed, whether that support means a few kind words or several massive actions.

Of course, you can’t be there for everybody, all the time. Your time, energy and other resources are limited. But what you can do is identify the genuinely important people in your life and then seek to be there as much as possible, at least for them.

Advertising

Your support will help them practically, and it will comfort them emotionally; which makes one hell of a difference in a relationship.

The Bottom Line

With the right mindset and the right behavior, you can strengthen a wide range of relationships in your life and advance them as far as they can be advanced.

And with strong relationships, not only that you feel more fulfilled, but you feel more connected to the entire world. You feel that your life has real value, you have more fun and you live in the moment. An entire world of opportunities opens up in front of you.

Then your task is to simply walk through the open doors.

More About Effective Communication

Featured photo credit: Proxyclick Visitor Management System via unsplash.com

Read Next