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9 Things Only People Who’re Not Good At Expressing Themselves Can Relate To

9 Things Only People Who’re Not Good At Expressing Themselves Can Relate To

For some people, expression of thoughts and emotions comes easy. For others, it’s not so natural. If you fall into the latter category, you’re not alone. Here are 9 things only people who aren’t good at expressing themselves can relate to.

1. You’re perceived as cold

With little facial expression and very few words, people usually think you’re so cold and dare not to approach you. The fact is that your emotions are always stirring inside while your outside doesn’t react accordingly.

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2. Your intelligence is often underestimated

People often take fluency in languages as the key of intelligence. It’s true that people who’re fluent in languages have their talents. But it doesn’t mean people who’re not good at expressing themselves are not equally intelligent. Many times in discussion or when meeting new people, as they find you sitting quietly, they’d conclude that you’re not smart enough. They don’t know many highly successful people in human history are not good at expressing themselves (e.g. Albert Einstein).

3. You often think for so long to answer a question

Sometimes it’s hard to find the right word. Words can’t always illustrate your exact thoughts. But more often it’s just too hard to find an absolute answer. To you, things are full of possibilities, you’d seldom conclude things sounding like an expert.

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4. You find large group gatherings tiring

In large group gatherings, people exchange views in a quick and surface manner. Before you give an idea, they’ve turned into a new topic already. You’re not good at responding so quickly, nor to interrupt effectively.

5.You’re a great listener

Though you’re not good at speaking, there’re some advantages too. You won’t interrupt like most people do, so when people tell you their sad stories, you really listen. Real listening doesn’t mean giving your own opinions, but just to really listen, show your interest and understanding. Therefore, people find it comforting to have you on their sides, especially when they’re in bad moods.

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6. You prefer actions than words

You always know actions speak louder than words. That’s why you spend little time on promoting yourself. Instead, you kickstart things right away to prove your ideas. In personal life, you spend little efforts (actually it’s a great challenge for you too) on polishing your words, you prefer putting them into actions instead of making vague and sugar-coated promises.

7. You sometimes find it hard to vent out your emotions

As said before, not being good at expressing yourself doesn’t mean you don’t have emotions. When you have lots of emotions, you sometimes feel like exploding as they’re stuck in your mind and body.

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8. You sometimes find yourself awkward when you spell out your feelings

When you finally try to express your feelings in better ways, you find yourself really awkward, so as people around you who’re not used to it. They’d think you must have gone crazy.

9. Your best friends know all these and won’t force you to change

Fortunately your best friends know all these. They know your struggles and deepest thoughts. They’ve never tried to change you but just to admire such a special friend.

Featured photo credit: Mitya Ku via flic.kr

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Anna Johansson

Anna specializes in entrepreneurship, technology, and social media trends.

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Last Updated on July 27, 2020

7 Ways to Make Life Changing Decisions

7 Ways to Make Life Changing Decisions

Most people don’t know the profound effects of making life decisions. Often times, we go through life oblivious to what thoughts we are thinking and what actions we are taking. Every single decision we make in our days shapes our current reality. It shapes who we are as a person because we habitually follow through with the decisions we make without even realizing it.

If you’re unhappy with the results in your life right now, making the effort to changing your decisions starting today will be the key to creating the person you want to be and the life you want to have in the future.

Let’s talk about the 7 ways you can go about making life changing decisions.

1. Realize the Power of Decision Making

Before you start making a decision, you have to understand what a decision does.

Any decision that you make causes a chain of events to happen. When you decide to pick up a cigarette to smoke it, that decision might result in you picking up another one later on to get that same high feeling. After a day, you may have gone through a pack without knowing it. But if you decide not to smoke that first cigarette and make a decision every five minutes to focus your attention somewhere else when you get that craving, after doing this for a week, your cravings will eventually subside and you will become smoke-free.

But it comes down to making that very first decision of deciding whether or not to pick up that cigarette.

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2. Go with Your Gut

Often times, we take too much time to make a decision because we’re afraid of what’s going to happen. As a result of this, we go through things like careful planning, deep analysis, and pros and cons before deciding. This is a very time consuming process.

Instead, learn to trust your gut instinct. For the most part, your first instinct is usually the one that is correct or the one that you truly wanted to go with.

Even if you end up making a mistake, going with your gut still makes you a more confident decision maker compared to someone who takes all day to decide.

3. Carry Your Decision Out

When you make a decision, act on it. Commit to making a real decision.

What’s a real decision? It’s when you decide on something, and that decision is carried out through action. It’s pointless to make a decision and have it played out in your head, but not doing anything about it. That’s the same as not making a decision at all.

If you want to make real changes in life, you have to make it a habit to apply action with your decision until it’s completed. By going through this so many times, you will feel more confident with accomplishing the next decision that you have in mind.

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4. Tell Others About Your Decisions

There’s something about telling other people what we’re going to do that makes us follow through.

For example, for the longest time, I’ve been trying to become an early riser. Whenever I tried to use my own willpower, waking up early without falling back asleep felt impossible. So what I did was I went to a forum and made the decision to tell people that I would wake up at 6 AM and stay up. Within two days, I was able to accomplish doing this because I felt a moral obligation to follow through with my words even though I failed the first time.

Did people care? Probably not, but just the fact that there might be someone else out there seeing if you’re telling the truth will give you enough motivation to following through with your decision.

5. Learn from Your Past Decisions

Even after I failed to follow through my decision the first time when I told people I was going to wake up early and stay up, I didn’t give up. I basically asked myself, “What can I do this time to make it work tomorrow?”

The truth is, you are going to mess up at times when it comes to making decisions. Instead of beating yourself up over it, learn something from it.

Ask yourself, what was good about the decision I made? What was bad about it? What can I learn from it so I can make a better decision next time?

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Remember, don’t put so much emphasis focusing on short term effects; instead focus on the long term effects.

6. Maintain a Flexible Approach

I know this might sound counter-intuitive, but making a decision doesn’t mean that you can’t be open to other options.

For example, let’s say you made the decision to lose ten pounds by next month through cardio. If something comes up, you don’t have to just do cardio. You can be open to losing weight through different methods of dieting as long as it helps you reach your goal in the end.

Don’t be stubborn to seek out only one way of making a decision. Embrace any new knowledge that brings you closer to accomplishing your initial decision.

7. Have Fun Making Decisions

Finally, enjoy the process. I know decision-making might not be the most fun thing world to do, but when you do it often, it becomes a game of opportunity.

You’ll learn a lot about yourself on the way, you’ll feel and become a lot more confident when you’re with yourself and around others, and making decisions will just become a lot easier after you do it so often that you won’t even think about it.

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Anything you decide to do from this point on can have a profound effect later on. Opportunities are always waiting for you. Examine the decisions that you currently have in the day.

Are there any that can be changed to improve your life in some way? Are there any decisions that you can make today that can create a better tomorrow?

Final Thoughts

Some decisions in life are harder to make, but with these 7 pieces of advice, you can trust yourself more even when you’re making some of the most important decisions.

Making a decision is the only way to move forward. So remember, any decision is better than none at all.

More Tips for Making Better Decisions

Featured photo credit: Justin Luebke via unsplash.com

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