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Are You A Control Freak? Use It To Your Advantage

Are You A Control Freak? Use It To Your Advantage

There are many people who are considered as the controlling type. Everybody has met someone like this at some point in their life – Type A, OCD people or control freaks. On the other hand, there is a completely opposite group of people who just couldn’t care less about things. These labels usually have a negative connotation, as nobody likes being controlled or manipulated by someone else. However, being a control freak doesn’t necessarily mean that you are a bad person.

Think about it, there are many pleasant people out there, but does that make them good by default? Maybe, and maybe not… it depends. Every kind of personality has good and bad sides. It is important to know yourself and work on your bad sides, or to try and use the things which are “negative” to your advantage. Being controlling is undesirable in certain situations, but there are times when it may be mandatory. If you are a control freak, then you’ve come to the right place because today, we will talk about how you can use your personality to your advantage, both personally and professionally.

Use your readiness and creativity

Most control freaks think about everything. We are not just controlling about other people, but about ourselves as well. This is why we are always ready for the things that await us; prepared for all obstacles. Not only that we think about things that await us, but we take even further steps.

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Things like designing situations that might develop, thinking about them, planning your moves and taking all the necessary things in account are not uncommon to people who want to be in control. This quality of yours can give you a key advantage in your career, enabling you to prepare well for job interviews, give creative suggestions at work and never disappoint your boss by breaking deadlines.

Take control of your environment

You don’t enjoy messiness! Period. This is a valuable trait you should definitively look to nourish even further. Nobody loves messy people. Its OK while you are teenager, but as you get older, people will think you are an immature kid. When I was in my early 20s, I used to boss people around, telling them how they are messy and stuff, but on the other hand, I didn’t take care of my own living environment.

Not because I was too lazy to do it, but just because I liked to spend most of my time controlling everyone else, rather than myself. That’s why people despised me. Take that inner voice that demands perfection and use it on yourself to make your living or working space sparkle. However, you need to make sure that you are being smart and efficient about organizing your environment, so that you don’t spend a lot of time on making your office just right, instead of actually doing your job.

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Get the job done

As a control freak you don’t shy away from working hard. This is something you should look to take advantage of, as people are getting lazier and lazier. I personally used this excessive energy to progress in my career and work hard towards brand new promotions and better job positions. Employers love hard workers, and my devotion gave me a key advantage in the workplace, as most of my employers respected me for my hard work; and they rewarded me as well.

Let your tidiness and punctuality shine

Nobody schedules time better than control freaks, and nobody has a tidier office and home. Punctuality and tidiness will earn you quite a few bonus points with your employers and business associates, so feel free to let your controlling inner self shine. The compulsion to have everything just perfect will allow you to spend some time on tidying up, e.g. performing regular rug cleaning and maintenance and ironing your clothes every morning, and ensure that both you and your immediate surroundings look presentable.

Also, very few people are going to be at their desk exactly on time every single day, turning in projects ahead of schedule or paying incredible attention to detail, and this gives you an edge over the people you are competing against in the business world.

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Use your toughness to get what you want

I am a tough person by nature, and people know this. Why? Simply because I don’t let anything slide, I like to cover every case scenario and consider all possible roads ahead. This is something that can be annoying to others, since many people don’t think that much when arguing with someone, or they are influenced by emotion. Being assertive and confident can do you lot of good, both in your career and personal life, as you will be able to negotiate what you want and prove your dominance to others. It may sound harsh, but this is how life works. It’s every man for himself.

Make decisions that nobody else will

Focus and decisiveness is something all of “us” have and this helps us get to the bottom line of every issue. This is something that presents a problem to other people and that’s why they can’t make hard decisions that concern their life or career. Constantly staying in your comfort zone and not having the courage to do what has to be done never got anybody anywhere. Luckily, you have the potential to overcome these issues easily.

Your desire for leadership will give you progress

Why do people call us control freaks? Simply because we want to tell everybody what to do. Luckily, this is not necessarily a bad thing, as there is a constant need for quality leaders. For example, if you are planning on starting a business of your own, your desire to organize things the way you see them can be very useful. A business owner needs to be a leader who can quickly organize people and tell them what their next steps are. Furthermore, employees usually have greater respect if their superior is a confident business leader.

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These are the things you should look to use to your advantage, but be careful how you use them. There is a right place and a right time for each of them, and you should learn what they are in order to use them positively.

Featured photo credit: ARTZ5143 SCM HANDS MASTER/Juan Carlos Pachón via flickr.com

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Ivan Dimitrijevic

Ivan is the CEO and founder of a digital marketing company. He has years of experiences in team management, entrepreneurship and productivity.

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Last Updated on January 16, 2020

12 Simple Ways to Boost Your Confidence Right Now

12 Simple Ways to Boost Your Confidence Right Now

The way you feel about yourself greatly influences how you live and interact with others. If you are confident about yourself, you tend to see yourself positively and actually enjoy spending time with and around people. You don’t feel self-conscious or awkward around others, and that allows you to live your fullest and happiest life.

However, if you’re drowning in a sea of self-doubt, hesitancy and shyness, you often withdraw and isolate yourself from others and avoid interacting and connecting with people. That anxiety you feel in the pit of your stomach when you are around people is holding you back greatly and it is not good for your emotional health and overall well-being. You need to do something about it if you are low in self-confidence or have friends or family members who are not confident.

“Confidence isn’t walking into a room thinking you’re better than everyone, it’s walking in not having to compare yourself to anyone” – Anonymous

Here are simple, practical tips to boost your confidence right now and make you feel and act your best.

1. Stop labeling yourself as awkward, timid or shy.

When you label yourself as awkward, timid or shy, you sub-consciously tell your mind to act accordingly and psychologically feel inclined to live up to those expectations. Instead of labeling and entertaining negative self-talk, visualize and affirm yourself as confident and strong. Close your eyes for a minute and visualize yourself in different situation as you would like to be.

Be your own cheerleader. Experts believe that positive affirmation and good mental practices like picturing yourself winning or achieving a goal can lead to greater feelings of self-assurance and prepare your brain for success.[1] As the saying goes, “seeing is believing.” Picture yourself as confident and soon enough you will begin to manifest behavior that gives evidence to this new ‘fact.’

2. Recognize that the world is not focused on you (unless, of course, you are Kanye West).

That means you don’t have to be excessively sensitive about who you are or what you are doing (or not doing). You are not on the center stage; there is no need for preoccupation with self and perfectionism. As rap music star Rocko sings, “You just do you and I will do me, aight?”

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Forget about trying to please everyone or being perfect. Trying to be perfect and being a people-pleaser puts too much pressure on you and creates unnecessary anxiety. Besides, people are too preoccupied with their own issues to pay much attention to your every move unless, of course, you are a mega famous, super celebrity like Beyonce or Kanye West.

3. Focus on other people as opposed to yourself.

If you are low on confidence, self-conscious, nervous and shy in social situations, focus your attention on other people and what they are saying or doing instead of focusing on your own awkwardness.

For example, think about what it is that is interesting about the person who’s the centre of the party or the guy or girl you are talking with. Prompt them to talk more about themselves and be genuinely curious and interested in what they say. You will instantly come across as confident and warmhearted.

People generally want to talk about themselves, be heard and understood. They will love it when you’re eager and willing to listen to them and really hear what they have to say.

This habit of focusing more on what you love in others as opposed to what you dislike in yourself will not only help you become more assertive and comfortable in virtually all social situations, but also instantly make you feel great about yourself.

4. Know (and accept) yourself for who you are.

Chinese military general, strategist and philosopher Sun Tzu, author of the internationally acclaimed book The Art of War, said, “Know yourself and you will win all battles.” Even in the battle with lack of confidence, you will need to know yourself to win.

Knowing yourself starts with understanding that people are not all the same, neither are all social situation suitable for everyone. You might not be confident in large gatherings, but you could be bold and confident in one-on-one and small group interactions. We all have our own unique gifts and unique ways of expressing ourselves. Embrace yours!

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Introverts, for example, have a quiet confidence that is, unfortunately, often confused for shyness. They are naturally low key and prefer to spend time alone. However, this natural disposition affords them certain unique gifts, such as an ability to listen better than most people and notice things that others don’t.

Your uniqueness is where your strength and advantage lies. You won’t be comfortable and confident in all situations all the time. Albert Einstein said,

“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.”

5. Crack a smile.

If there is one sure way to instantly boost your confidence, it’s cracking a smile. Christine Clapp, a public speaking expert at The George Washington University, says that flashing those pretty, pearly white teeth will immediately make you appear both confident and composed. But, the effect of smiling is not just external. Studies show that smiling can also help nix feelings of stress and pave the way for a happier and more relaxed you.[2]

Not a bad return for something seemingly so trite, wouldn’t you agree?

6. Break a sweat—with exercise.

Working out is another great way to make yourself feel amazing and confident. Science has shown that exercising increases your endorphins, helps reduce stress, tones your muscles and makes you feel happy and confident.[3]

And hey, all you have to do is take a walk a few times a week and you’ll see the benefits. What seems to matter—as far as your confidence goes—is whether you break a sweat, not how strenuous your session is, which is pretty cool. Start working out now.

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7. Groom yourself.

This might seem mundane, but it’s amazing how much of a difference a shower and shave can have on your confidence and self-image. And when you spritz on a scent, the boost on confidence and self-esteem is incredible. As it turns out, your favorite fragrance does more than make you smell oh-so-nice.

A study found that a fragrance can inspire confidence in men. Interestingly, the study also found that the more a man likes the fragrance, the more confident he might feel. Another study found that 90% of women feel more confident while wearing a scent than those who go fragrance-free.

8. Dress nicely.

Another one that might seem trite, but it works. If you dress nicely, you’ll instantly feel good about yourself and give your confidence a real boost. That is largely because you’ll feel attractive, presentable and sometimes even successful in nice clothes.

While dressing nicely means something different for everyone, it does not necessarily mean wearing $500 designer outfits. It means wearing clothes that are clean, that you are comfortable in and that are nice-looking and presentable, including casual clothes.

9. Do activities you enjoy.

Whether it is reading a book, playing a musical instrument, riding your bicycle or going fishing, do what you really enjoy and what makes you truly happy often. It will boost your self-esteem, soothe your ego and allow you to identify with your gifts and talents. That will in turn bolster your self-belief and grow your confidence exponentially.

You might not become popular for doing what you love, but you might not even want to be popular at all. Being popular doesn’t make you happy; doing what you love does.

10. Prepare for the possibility of rejection / setback.

Late World No. 1 professional tennis player Arthur Ashe said, “One important key to success is self-confidence. A key to self-confidence is preparation.” You need to prepare for the possibility of rejection and setback.

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Why?

Everybody suffers rejection and setback at one point or another. You are not exempted. The question on your mind, therefore, should not be if you will be rejected, but how you will handle rejection when it comes.

Prepare yourself adequately in every situation to minimize the risk and effect of rejection and so that your confidence is not broken. For example, learn public speaking and rehearse what you are going to say beforehand if you have landed a public speaking engagement. That way, you are sure of yourself and confident you have what it takes to hack it. If you are rejected, don’t take it personally.

Rejection and setbacks happen to the best of us. Take it as a learning experience. Learn from your mistakes and move on.

11. Face uncomfortable situations square in the face.

Don’t run away from uncomfortable situations. Running away from people or situations because you feel scared, shy or timid only confirms and reinforces your shyness. Instead, face the situation that makes you uneasy square in the face. For example, go ahead and talk to that person you are afraid to approach, or go straight to the front of your yoga class! What’s the worst that can happen?

Prepare and be ready for any eventuality. The more you face your fears, the more you realize you are stronger than you thought and the more confident you get. This simple, yet admittedly courageous, act makes you unstoppable. You get comfortable being uncomfortable and begin to feel like you can take on the world. And that is the hallmark of someone destined for great things.

12. Sit up straight and walk tall—you are awesome!

Yes, sit up straight and believe you are awesome. Don’t slump in your chair or slouch your shoulders. Experts say the right stance can not only keep your self-esteem and mood lifted, but also lead to more confidence in your own thoughts.[4]

The way to sit is to open up your chest and keep your head level so that you look and feel poised and assured. And when you get up, stand tall and walk like you’re on a mission. People who sit up straight and walk tall are more attractive and instantly feel more confident. Try it now: you’ll feel fierce and confident just by sitting up straight and walking tall.

Featured photo credit: Freshh Connection via unsplash.com

Reference

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