Advertising
Advertising

5 Benefits of Having Annoying People in Your Life

5 Benefits of Having Annoying People in Your Life

Having friends brings many benefits to our lives. We view having friends as being a positive influence, otherwise why would we hang out with them, right? Well, there are some very solid benefits to having friends that annoy you. Below I will show you five of these benefits. At the end, my hope is you will come to appreciate some of those annoying friends of yours or even appreciate some of the idiosyncrasies the friends you care for the most have.

1. Teaching Patience

This is probably the one area that many of us need help with. It is easy to listen to someone when they are telling you what you like or want to hear. However, sometimes, you may gain valuable nuggets of information from those that can be quite annoying. Learn to be patient with all those interact with and you may find you can gain some interesting insights and maybe even learn something new.

Advertising

2. Encouraging Open Mindedness

We tend to find favor and be more interested in what others have to say, as long as we agree with it. The truth of the matter, is whether or not we agree with something doesn’t make it any less true. The next time that annoying person tells you something you don’t agree with, don’t automatically dismiss it. Take a moment to see if there is merit in what they are saying. Being open to an opposing viewpoint can bring greater clarity to your way of thinking.

3. Improving Listening Skills

As mentioned in the benefit above, it is easy to listen to someone when we agree. However, when someone annoys us many of us simply want to shut them out – we stop listening. By doing this, we rob ourselves from developing one of the most important life skills one can learn and that is listening. When we are being annoyed, it takes that much more effort to listen to what someone has to say. The harder it is to listen, the strong we can build our “listening muscle”. The next time you want to tune someone out, resist the temptation and practice listening.

Advertising

4. Learning Appreciation

By understanding the previous three benefits, in time, you will come to appreciate the diversity of thought these “annoying people” can bring to your life. Some will challenge you while others will down right annoy you to the point of wanting to inflict bodily harm. If you take a step back, you will begin to learn to appreciate your differences. This appreciation can translate to appreciation in other areas of your life with even the simplest of things like music or food. While I’m not suggesting that all annoyances good for you; however that can open new areas of your life you can appreciate and enrich your overall being.

5. Challenging You To Be Better

This benefit is an interesting one, especially for those that don’t think they need to change or are good enough. When dealing with someone that annoys you, there will be times where you have to take the high road or be the better person. Putting this into practice is much easier said than done. However, if you can embrace this challenge, you will find yourself looking for ways to be and do better. In the end, thinking and acting this way can only serve to improve your life.

Advertising

Conclusion

We have taken a look at 5 benefits that annoying people can bring to your life. Can you think of anymore? When we look at the diversity around us it’s easier to gravitate to that which is more familiar, comfortable, and likeable. I challenge you to learn to see the beauty in these annoying people and accept them for who they are. By doing so, the one who stands to benefit the most is you.

Featured photo credit: The more you talk, the less you’re heard./Tez Goodyer via flickr.com

Advertising

More by this author

5 Secrets To Success From An Army Ranger 5 Benefits of Having Annoying People in Your Life 7 Ways to Measure Emotional Intelligence Following The Eccentric Habits Of These 10 Geniuses Can Make You Smarter

Trending in Communication

1 The Secret to Effective Conflict Resolution: The IBR Approach 2 How to Master Effective Communication Skills at Work and Home 3 Building Relationships: 11 Rules for Self-Promotion 4 18 Ways to Have Effective Communication in the Workplace 5 How to Make Changes in Life To Be The Very Best Version of You

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on February 21, 2019

The Secret to Effective Conflict Resolution: The IBR Approach

The Secret to Effective Conflict Resolution: The IBR Approach

In business, in social relationships, in family… In whatever context conflict is always inevitable, especially when you are in the leader role. This role equals “make decisions for the best of majority” and the remaining are not amused. Conflicts arise.

Conflicts arise when we want to push for a better quality work but some members want to take a break from work.

Conflicts arise when we as citizens want more recreational facilities but the Government has to balance the needs to maintain tourism growth.

Conflicts are literally everywhere.

Avoiding Conflicts a No-No and Resolving Conflicts a Win-Win

Avoiding conflicts seem to be a viable option for us. The cruel fact is, it isn’t. Conflicts won’t walk away by themselves. They will, instead, escalate and haunt you back even more when we finally realize that’s no way we can let it be.

Moreover, avoiding conflicts will eventually intensify the misunderstanding among the involved parties. And the misunderstanding severely hinders open communication which later on the parties tend to keep things secret. This is obviously detrimental to teamwork.

Advertising

Some may view conflicts as the last step before arguments. And they thus leave it aside as if they never happen. This is not true.

Conflicts are the intersect point between different individuals with different opinions. And this does not necessarily lead to argument.

Instead, proper handling of conflicts can actually result in a win-win situation – both parties are pleased and allies are gained. A better understanding between each other and future conflicts are less likely to happen.

The IBR Approach to Resolve Conflicts

Here, we introduce to you an effective approach to resolve conflicts – the Interest-Based Relational (IBR) approach. The IBR approach was developed by Roger Fisher and William Ury in their 1981 book Getting to Yes. It stresses the importance of the separation between people and their emotions from the problem. Another focus of the approach is to build mutual understanding and respect as they strengthen bonds among parties and can ultimately help resolve conflicts in a harmonious way. The approach suggests a 6-step procedure for conflict resolution:

Step 1: Prioritize Good Relationships

How? Before addressing the problem or even starting the discussion, make it clear the conflict can result in a mutual trouble and through subsequent respectful negotiation the conflict can be resolved peacefully. And that brings the best outcome to the whole team by working together.

Why? It is easy to overlook own cause of the conflict and point the finger to the members with different opinions. With such a mindset, it is likely to blame rather than to listen to the others and fail to acknowledge the problem completely. Such a discussion manner will undermine the good relationships among the members and aggravate the problem.

Advertising

Example: Before discussion, stress that the problem is never one’s complete fault. Everyone is responsible for it. Then, it is important to point out our own involvement in the problem and state clearly we are here to listen to everyone’s opinions rather than accusing others.

Step 2: People Are NOT the Cause of Problem

How? State clearly the problem is never one-sided. Collaborative effort is needed. More importantly, note the problem should not be taken personally. We are not making accusations on persons but addressing the problem itself.

Why? Once things taken personally, everything will go out of control. People will become irrational and neglect others’ opinions. We are then unable to address the problem properly because we cannot grasp a fuller and clearer picture of the problem due to presumption.

Example: In spite of the confronting opinions, we have to emphasize that the problem is not a result of the persons but probably the different perspectives to view it. So, if we try to look at the problem from the other’s perspective, we may understand why there are varied opinions.

Step 3: Listen From ALL Stances

How? Do NOT blame others. It is of utmost importance. Ask for everyone’s opinions. It is important to let everyone feel that they contribute to the discussion. Tell them their involvement is essential to solve the problem and their effort is very much appreciated.

Why? None wants to be ignored. If one feels neglected, it is very likely for he/she to be aggressive. It is definitely not what we hope to see in a discussion. Acknowledging and being acknowledged are equally important. So, make sure everyone has equal opportunity to express their views. Also, realizing their opinions are not neglected, they will be more receptive to other opinions.

Advertising

Example: A little trick can played here: Invite others to talk first. It is an easy way to let others feel involved and ,more importantly, know their voices are heard. Also, we can show that we are actively listening to them by giving direct eye-contact and nodding. One important to note is that never interrupt anyone. Always let them finish first beforeanother one begins.

Step 4: Listen Comes First, Talk Follows

How? Ensure everyone has listened to one another points of view. It can be done by taking turn to speak and leaving the discussion part at last. State once again the problem is nothing personal and no accusation should be made.

Why? By turn-taking, everyone can finish talking and voices of all sides can be heard indiscriminantly. This can promote willingness to listen to opposing opinions.

Example: We can prepare pieces of paper with different numbers written on them. Then, ask different members to pick one and talk according to the sequence of the number. After everyone’s finished, advise everyone to use “I” more than “You” in the discussion period to avoid others thinking that it is an accusation.

Step 5: Understand the Facts, Then Address the Problem

How? List out ALL the facts first. Ask everyone to tell what they know about the problems.

Why? Sometimes your facts are unknown to the others while they may know something we don’t. Missing out on these facts could possibly lead to inaccurate capture of the problem. Also, different known facts can lead to different perception of the matter. It also helps everyone better understand the problem and can eventually help reach a solution.

Advertising

Example: While everyone is expressing their own views, ask them to write down everything they know that is true to the problem. As soon as everyone has finished, all facts can be noted and everyone’s understanding of the problem is raised.

Step 6: Solve the Problem Together

How? Knowing what everyone’s thinking, it is now time to resolve the conflict. Up to this point, everyone should have understood the problem better. So, it is everyone’s time to suggest some solutions. It is important not to have one giving all the solutions.

Why? Having everyone suggesting their solutions is important as they will not feel excluded and their opinions are considered. Besides, it may also generate more solutions that can better resolve the conflicts. Everyone will more likely be satisfied with the result.

Example: After discussion, ask all members to suggest any possible solutions and stress that all solutions are welcomed. State clearly that we are looking for the best outcomes for everyone’s sake rather than battling to win over one another. Then, evaluate all the solutions and pick the one that is in favor of everyone.

Read Next