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5 Things You May Want to Know About Yourself

5 Things You May Want to Know About Yourself

Life is all about going along for the ride. This has never been a cakewalk for anyone. While some people respond to life’s adversities with optimism and hope, there are others who are not as blessed to experience or advocate the same perspective. Self-control and patience play an inadvertently important role during the toughest phases of our lives. And yes, it is quite easy to formulate a plan and preach along the lines. A lot depends on how an individual takes in what is learned and adapting it for betterment.

You may be wondering as to how one can tune their minds on a manual mode in the difficult circumstances. Some of us talk to the therapists, while the rest read up online for inspiration. If you are in the league of the latter, here is an explanation coming your way, precisely explaining the truth that you may want to know about yourself. This is very important, as looking into your inner abilities paves the way to tackle those outer obstacles. The five most important things that you need to know about yourself as a part of human race are:

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1. You are a survivor

Yes. The human race is all about surviving. Human beings are the most superior of all the living beings, we have been made with an impeccable capacity to fight, adapt and exist. Surviving great mishaps and problems is really not a challenge for us. We just get slow and demotivated, driven by the external factors.

The truth is, you have every bearing to stand up during the test of time to fight it out and get to the end destination. Be it a personal tragedy, financial difficulty, or a mental conflict, you have been equipped with an invisible shield to use and protect yourself from the adversities. It is all up to you as to how to put this power into full use.

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2. You have been pre-programmed to succeed 

Remember the period of evolution when the man came out of monkeys? Think through the process. We have been inherently programmed to evolve and emerge. Evolving oneself is not just about changing habitat and the surroundings. It is also about rising above tough situations and proving to be bigger than that.

Remember that it is your most real self to adapt, reboot and relive. The process may take varied time length for different people. But the process is inevitable. You will ultimately stand up to take charge of the situation. You have been born with it.

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3. You will make your own rules

Take a look at the rules that have been set in place for the totality of civilization. They are nothing but man-made arrangements for ideal conditions. The same holds good for your individual struggle. The fact that you have landed in a particular situation will be largely due to the way you would have behaved or reacted to it.

4. You will get better, not bitter!

There is a saying – you can either become better or bitter with difficulties. Be assured that your mind will first look at the ‘better’ options and not bitter. You have to grab the moment and instill some pep talk that keeps you driving towards bettering yourself after a hurdle. Now, this ability is not easily acquired for most of us.

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But remember that it is not impossible to do so. Programming your mind for better tomorrow sows the seeds of progress in the sub conscious. Better thoughts that lead to better actions and even better results. You have it in you to get better by the day, and not otherwise.

5. Look into the mirror – that is your final competition

There is no better contender in life than your own self. It is important to battle out with your negative feelings and emerge positive. This is a bit of work that can be done with self-motivation and constant affirmations. You are your end game and the rest is all a big fiction that goes on around. Look into the mirror; that is your ultimate contest.

Win over your own inner demons, and the outer devils will be easily taken care of. Most times, it is all happening in your mind, and that is where you can change the plot. Make sure you follow this simple Mantra to enrich your inner soul and mind-set.

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Lisa smith

Writer, Author & Designer

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Last Updated on April 14, 2021

How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide)

How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide)

We all lose our temper from time to time, and expressing anger is actually a healthy thing to do in our relationships with others. Expressing our differences in opinion allows us to have healthy conflict and many times come to an agreement or understanding that works for everyone. However, there are times when anger can become overwhelming or damaging, and during these times, it’s important to learn how to deal with anger.

Expressing anger inappropriately can be harmful to relationships, both personal and professional. You may express too much anger, too often, or at times that are only going to make things worse, not better. In this article we will look at anger management techniques that will help you better control your emotions.

Let’s take a deeper look at how to deal with anger.

Expressing Anger

Anger is a natural and normal part of almost any relationship. This includes relationships with your significant other, kids, boss, friends, family, etc. Anger provides us with valuable information if we are willing to listen to it. It clues us in to areas where we disagree with others and things that need to be changed or altered.

Unhealthy Ways to Express Anger

Here are some common yet unhealthy ways to express anger that you should avoid:

Being Passive-Aggressive

This is a term many of us are familiar with. Passive-aggressive behavior happens when someone is angry but uses indirect communication to express their anger.

Some of the more common passive-aggressive behaviors include the silent treatment, making comments about someone behind their back, being grumpy, moody, or pouting, or simply not doing tasks or assignments that they should.

This is a passive-aggressive person’s way of showing their anger. It’s not very productive but extremely common.

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Poorly-Timed

Some people get overwhelmed and express anger in a situation where it can’t really do any good.

An example would be getting angry at one person in front of a crowd of people. All that does is make people uncomfortable and shuts them down. It’s not a healthy way to express anger or disagreement with someone.

Ongoing Anger

Being angry all the time is most often a symptom of something else. It’s healthy and normal to express anger when you disagree with someone. However, if someone is angry most of the time and always seems to be expressing their anger to everyone around them, this won’t serve them well.

Over time, people will start to avoid this person and have as little contact as possible. The reason being is no one likes being around someone who is angry all the time; it’s a no-win situation.

Healthy Ways to Express Anger

What about the healthy ways[1] to adapt? When learning how to deal with anger, here are some healthy ways to get you started.

Being Honest

Express your anger or disagreement honestly. Be truthful about what it is that is making you angry. Sometimes this will entail walking away and thinking about it for a bit before you respond.

Don’t say you’re mad at something someone did or said when it’s really something else that upset you.

Being Direct

Similar to being honest, being direct is a healthy way to express anger.

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Don’t talk around something that is making you angry. Don’t say that one thing is making you angry when it’s really something else, and don’t stack items on top of each other so you can unload on someone about 10 different things 6 months from now.

Be direct and upfront about what is making you angry. Ensure you are expressing your anger to the person who upset you or you are angry at, not to someone else. This is very counterproductive.

Being Timely

When something makes you angry, it’s much better to express it in a timely manner. Don’t keep it bottled up inside of you, as that’s only going to do more harm than good.

Think of the marriages that seem to go up in flames out of nowhere when the reality is someone kept quiet for years until they hit their breaking point.

Expressing anger as it occurs is a much healthier way of using anger to help us guide our relationships in the moment.

How to Deal With Anger

If you feel angry, how should you deal with it right at that moment?

1. Slow Down

From time to time, I receive an email at work that makes me so angry that steam is probably pouring out of my ears.

In my less restrained moments, I have been known to fire off a quick response, and that typically has ended about as well as you might imagine.

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When I actually walk away from my computer and go do something else for a while, I am able to calm down and think more rationally. After that happens, I am able to respond in a more appropriate and productive manner. Doing things that helps you learn how to release anger can make an uncomfortable situation more manageable before it gets out of hand.

2. Focus on the “I”

Remember that you are the one that’s upset. Don’t accuse people of making you upset because, in the end, it’s your response to what someone did that really triggered your anger. You don’t want to place blame by saying something like “Why don’t you ever put away your dishes?” Say something more like “Having dirty dishes laying on the counter upsets me—can you work with me to come to a solution?”

When you are accusatory towards someone, all that does is increase the tension. This doesn’t usually do anything except make your anger rise higher.

3. Work out

When learning how to deal with anger, exercise is a great outlet. If something happens that angers you, see if you have the opportunity to burn off some of the anger.

Being able to hit the gym to get a hard workout in is great. If this isn’t an option, see if you can go for a run or a bike ride. If you are at work when you become angry and the weather permits, at least go outside for a brisk walk.

Besides working some of your anger out through exercise, this also helps to give your mind a chance to work through some ways to address what it is that upset you.

If you’re not sure where to start with an exercise routine, check out Lifehack’s free Simple Cardio Home Workout Plan.

4. Seek Help When Needed

There are times when we could all use some help. Life can be stressful and overwhelming. It’s perfectly fine to seek some help from a mental health professional if it will help you get back to a healthy balance.If you find that you are angry all the time, it might be a good idea to go talk to an expert about learning to control intense emotions. They can give you some sound advice and ideas on how to get your anger to a more manageable and healthy level.

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5. Practice Relaxation

We all seem to lead incredibly busy lives, and that’s a good thing if we are loving the life we are living. That being said, it is very beneficial to our physical and mental well-being to take time out for relaxation.

That can mean spending time doing things that help us calm down and relax, like being around people we enjoy, practicing deep breathing or listening to music. It could be making time for things that help bring us balance like a healthy diet and physical activity.

Many people incorporate techniques such as yoga and meditation to calm their minds and release tension when learning how to deal with anger. Whatever your choice is, ensure you take time out to relax when warning signs of anger start to bubble up.

6. Laugh

Incorporating humor and laughter on a regular basis will help keep anger in check and help you get over a bad mood and feelings of anger more quickly. This isn’t part of formal anger management techniques, but you’ll be surprised by how well it works. Remember, life is a journey that’s meant to be enjoyed fully along the way through healthy emotion. Make sure you take time to laugh and have fun.Surround yourself with people that like to laugh and enjoy life. Don’t work at a job that just causes you stress, which can lead to anger. Work at something you enjoy doing.

7. Be Grateful

It’s easy to focus on the bad in life and the things that cause us negative emotions. It’s vitally important to remind ourselves of all the wonderful things in life that bring us positive emotions, things that we easily forget because we get caught up in the whirlwind of day to day life.

Take time out each day to remind yourself of a few things you are grateful for in order to help you learn how to release anger and invite in more positive feelings.

Final Thoughts

Life can be overwhelming at times. We seem to have constant pressure to achieve more and to always be on the go. People we are around and situations we are in can cause stress, anger, and negative emotions. At times, it can seem to be too much, and we get angry and our emotions start to get out of control.

During these times, keep in mind that life is an incredible journey, full of wonder and things that bring you joy. When you find yourself angry more often than is healthy, take time out to remember the good things in life—the things that we seem to forget yet bring us so much positive energy and emotions.

Use some of the tips included here to help with how to deal with anger and better control your emotions.

More Resources on Anger Management

Featured photo credit: Andre Hunter via unsplash.com

Reference

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