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11 Things to Remember When Your Girlfriend or Boyfriend is a Teacher

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11 Things to Remember When Your Girlfriend or Boyfriend is a Teacher

As teachers we are pragmatic and understand the realism of the world we live in. This is why we teach to impart knowledge and make others smarter. Because we are teachers doesn’t mean we are naïve, yet we can be willing to explore. Here are some things you should remember when dating us.

1. We are great conversationalists

Every day we repeat the cause of action to connect with and inform students of all kinds of backgrounds, work ethics and intellectual levels. Yes we are great at discussing and communicating.

2. We work beyond the office place

We won’t keep our work at work. We do more than teach, so don’t be amazed if we are bringing in our work home. You could find us planning lessons or correcting papers during weekends and answering emails from our students every now and then. We are not bored with doing our job, we just see it more as a call of duty.

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3. We are great at adapting

Our job comes with a lot of challenges, so we are great at adapting. We are ready to embrace new methods of teaching, new curriculum or welcome new students to our classes. We are always excited about change, it doesn’t faze us, it just makes us smarter.

4. We are patient

Yes, we have to be patient to tolerate different sorts of persons we teach. Patience is a skill the job has taught us, and this can be one of our greatest strength if we are in a relationship with you.

5. We don’t like you telling us our job is easy

Because our job is not easy. We have to be smart and show perseverance in many cases. We demand the summers off and all holidays. But even during such times, we tend to use them for professional development and recharging our mental energy.

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6. We are great with kids

We don’t see kids as vulnerable or weak. Rather, we see them as the future. And this makes us more responsible in performing our duties to them. The truth is that being with kids and students is one of the thrills of the profession. It makes us alive and always young.

7. We have to be creative at work

It feels terrible not to be listened to or termed as “boring.” So, we have to make teaching and impacting knowledge to be fun. We have to discover creative solutions to problems and channel this to those we are teaching.

8. We don’t tolerate bullying

We tend to stand up for the weak and the underdog. We feel we represent them and have a commitment to shape and equip those who are maligned in the society. If there is intolerance and weakness around us we will do our best to stand up for those around us who needs assistance.

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9. We are someone’s hero

You may feel that our job doesn’t amount to much, yet we must have touched someone’s life in a way you cannot imagine. While we do not expect all our students to like us, there are those we have impacted with knowledge that will always regard us as heroes.

10. We are effective communicators

We don’t care how long it takes, we will adopt variety of ways to explain a point and make sure it is clearly understood by the person we are communicating to. We appreciate communication and know how relevant it can be to a successful relationship.

11. We want people to be at ease when they are with us

Although we meet anxious students and persons now and then, we want to put people at ease. Perhaps this is why we are great at charming parents and anyone who comes to us for assistance. We understand what responsibility to the world around us and we tend offer ourselves in the best way possible.

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Featured photo credit: http://www.photopin.com via photopin.com

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Casey Imafidon

Specialized in motivation and personal growth, providing advice to make readers fulfilled and spurred on to achieve all that they desire in life.

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Last Updated on November 18, 2021

10 Proven Ways to Judge a Person’s Character

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10 Proven Ways to Judge a Person’s Character

We all fall into the trap of judging a person’s character by their appearance. How wrong we are! All too often, the real character of the person only appears when some negative event hits them or you. Then you may see a toxic person emerging from the ruins and it is often a shock.

A truly frightening example is revealed in the book by O’Toole in Bowman called Dangerous Instincts: How Gut Instincts Betray Us. A perfectly respectable, charming, well dressed neighbor was found to have installed a torture chamber in his garage where he was systematically abusing kidnapped women. This is an extreme example, but it does show how we can be totally deceived by a person’s physical appearance, manners and behavior.

So, what can you do? You want to be able to assess personal qualities when you come into contact with colleagues, fresh acquaintances and new friends who might even become lifelong partners. You want to know if they are:

  • honest
  • reliable
  • competent
  • kind and compassionate
  • capable of taking the blame
  • able to persevere
  • modest and humble
  • pacific and can control anger.

The secret is to reserve judgment and take your time. Observe them in certain situations; look at how they react. Listen to them talking, joking, laughing, explaining, complaining, blaming, praising, ranting, and preaching. Only then will you be able to judge their character. This is not foolproof, but if you follow the 10 ways below, you have a pretty good chance of not ending up in an abusive relationship.

1. Is anger a frequent occurrence?

All too often, angry reactions which may seem to be excessive are a sign that there are underlying issues. Do not think that every person who just snaps and throws his/her weight around mentally and physically is just reacting normally. Everyone has an occasional angry outburst when driving or when things go pear-shaped.

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But if this is almost a daily occurrence, then you need to discover why and maybe avoid that person. Too often, anger will escalate to violent and aggressive behavior. You do not want to be near someone who thinks violence can solve personal or global problems.

2. Can you witness acts of kindness?

How often do you see this person being kind and considerate? Do they give money to beggars, donate to charity, do voluntary work or in some simple way show that they are willing to share the planet with about 7 billion other people?

I was shocked when a guest of mine never showed any kindness to the weak and disadvantaged people in our town. She was ostensibly a religious person, but I began to doubt the sincerity of her beliefs.

“The best index to a person’s character is how he treats people who can’t do him any good, and how he treats people who can’t fight back.”

Abigail Van Buren

3. How does this person take the blame?

Maybe you know that s/he is responsible for a screw-up in the office or even in not turning up on time for a date. Look at their reaction. If they start blaming other colleagues or the traffic, well, this is an indication that they are not willing to take responsibility for their mistakes.

4. Don’t use Facebook as an indicator.

You will be relieved to know that graphology (the study of that forgotten skill of handwriting) is no longer considered a reliable test of a person’s character. Neither is Facebook stalking, fortunately. A study showed that Facebook use of foul language, sexual innuendo and gossip were not reliable indicators of a candidate’s character or future performance in the workplace.

5. Read their emails.

Now a much better idea is to read the person’s emails. Studies show that the use of the following can indicate certain personality traits:

  • Too many exclamation points may reveal a sunny disposition
  • Frequent errors may indicate apathy
  • Use of smileys is the only way a person can smile at you
  • Use of the third person may reveal a certain formality
  • Too many question marks can show anger
  • Overuse of capital letters is regarded as shouting. They are a definite no-no in netiquette, yet a surprising number of  people still use them.

6. Watch out for the show offs.

Listen to people as they talk. How often do they mention their achievements, promotions, awards and successes? If this happens a lot, it is a sure indication that this person has an over-inflated view of his/her achievements. They are unlikely to be modest or show humility. What a pity!  Another person to avoid.

7. Look for evidence of perseverance.

A powerful indicator of grit and tenacity is when a person persists and never gives up when they really want to achieve a life goal. Look for evidence of them keeping going in spite of enormous difficulties.

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Great achievements by scientists and inventors all bear the hallmark of perseverance. We only have to think of Einstein, Edison (who failed thousands of times) and Nelson Mandela to get inspiration. The US Department of Education is in no doubt about how grit, tenacity and perseverance will be key success factors for youth in the 21st century.

8. Their empathy score is high.

Listen to how they talk about the less fortunate members of our society such as the poor, immigrants and the disabled. Do you notice that they talk in a compassionate way about these people? The fact that they even mention them is a strong indicator of empathy.

People with zero empathy will never talk about the disadvantaged. They will rarely ask you a question about a difficult time or relationship. They will usually steer the conversation back to themselves. These people have zero empathy and in extreme cases, they are psychopaths who never show any feelings towards their victims.

9. Learn how to be socially interactive.

We are social animals and this is what makes us so uniquely human. If a person is isolated or a loner, this may be a negative indicator of their character. You want to meet a person who knows about trust, honesty and loyalty. The only way to practice these great qualities is to actually interact socially. The great advantage is that you can share problems and celebrate success and joy together.

“One can acquire everything in solitude, except character.”

Stendhal

 10. Avoid toxic people.

These people are trying to control others and often are failing to come to terms with their own failures. Typical behavior and conversations may concern:

  • Envy or jealousy
  • Criticism of partners, colleagues and friends
  • Complaining about their own lack of success
  • Blaming others for their own bad luck or failure
  • Obsession with themselves and their problems

Listen to these people talk and you will quickly discover that you need to avoid them at all costs because their negativity will drag you down. In addition, as much as you would like to help them, you are not qualified to do so.

Now, having looked at some of the best ways to judge a person, what about yourself? How do others see you? Why not take Dr. Phil’s quiz and find out. Can you bear it?

Featured photo credit: Jacek Dylag via unsplash.com

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