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10 Creative Ways To Comfort Without Speaking

10 Creative Ways To Comfort Without Speaking

There are many ways people go through a tough time, whether it is depression, anxiety, grieving.

There are many reasons people just feel off. So what do you do to comfort them?

Here are 10 creative ways to comfort without speaking.

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1. Comfort Food

This could be anything you know that person loves to eat. I hate to say this but I LOVE sweets! When I’m feeling down and someone brings be a bag of crispy M&M’s, or they have a tub of Ben & Jerry’s American Dream… I cannot help but give them a smile. Now if it was reversed and I was trying to comfort my daughter? She loves homemade food! It can be buttermilk biscuits and sausage gravy, tacos, cookies. Comfort foods were made for just that, comforting.

2. Hush the Mouth

I know that sounds harsh, because it probably is. If you are there to comfort your friend or loved one, then it’s not about you. Sometimes the best thing that you can do is be quiet and just sit there with them. This shows them that you have respect for them and that you really want to hear what they have to say; when they’re ready.

3. Patience

I know this one is hard to understand, let me explain it. Everyone goes through what is happening to them in their own time. If you were to show up huffing and puffing like the big bad wolf and it were me? I wouldn’t open up to you either. I get it, after a year and they are still moping around? Tough love might be good for them. If you show up two weeks after the incident and they are still laying on the couch and you want to be supportive? Suck it up buttercup you’re there for them remember?

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4. Hugs

Hugs are a great way to show comfort. I LOVE HUGS! This article from The Huffington Post by: Lindsay Homes, 7 Reasons Why We Should Be Giving More Hugs is a great example of why we should give out hugs as a silent comfort!

5. Warm Drinks

Sometimes it’s nice to be around people in a coffee shop. No one is talking to you but everyone is enjoying a warm drink (unless it’s summer). Examples of this are coffee, teas and cocoas. Does someone you know have the winter blues? How about mixing these tips and bringing them a basket with cookies AND their favorite type of coffee or cocoa? During the winter, one of the most comforting things for me is when it’s snowing outside to have a cup of coffee or tea in my hands. For my kids I make them cocoa, boil the water fill it up 1/4 to 1/2 the way, stir in the cocoa, then fill the rest of the way with milk. This makes it just warm enough to warm them up from playing in the snow, but not hot enough to scald their mouth.

6. Surprise Gifts

There is no need to say anything when you walk up to someone and leave them a basket of their favorite things. One example; your girlfriend just had a horrible break-up. What do you give someone for that? If it’s one of my buddies, I would throw together a basket with their favorite coffee, some creamer, different sweets, and a snuggly blanket, and a comedy (or a chick flick if they’re into that). No words needed.

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7. Charlie Chapman Style

Have you ever tried to be a mime? I’m not very good at it because I look like a frustrated ostrich. If my loved one is laughing and not crying? Mission accomplished! For my daughter, sometimes when she has had a bad day at school and she has a temper tantrum and isn’t intentionally trying to take it out on someone, I will show her what she looks like while doing it. Usually I get a laugh and a then she is okay, no it doesn’t always work. When I throw some humor on it and she starts laughing I know I’ve done something right.

8. Music

Music has always had a way to sooth the soul or the person for that matter. If you know the person that needs comfort and what they like for music, then it is almost as good as giving them a hug!

9. Get them out of the house

You don’t have to say anything when you get them out of the house. Go hop in the car throw their favorite tunes on and just drive. Sometimes this is what really does the trick for me.

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10. Just be there

I know that this sounds crazy, but sometimes if you just sit there and let someone know that you’re there it makes all of the difference in the world. I’m not someone who opens up easily. I can sit there and listen to your stories all day. It takes a really good friend to just sit there with me, not lecturing me, not saying anything, to get me to open up and let them comfort me.

There are so many other ways to comfort people through whatever type of time they are going through, these are just some of the basics and I hope that they bring you and your loved ones some comfort.

Featured photo credit: Pexels.com via pexels.com

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Last Updated on July 13, 2020

9 Simple Ways to Always Stay Positive

9 Simple Ways to Always Stay Positive

It’s common to be struck with a bout of pessimism, or to naturally be more towards the pessimistic end of the perspective spectrum. It’s hard to see the positives in life and become an optimist when you’re lost in the murky waters of negative thinking.

However, Henrik Edberg, the founder of The Positivity Blog is here to share nine ways we can create a more optimistic outlook and positive perspective:

“Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.” — Maria Robinson

When I was younger — in my teens and early 20s — I was trapped. Not physically, but mentally: by the destructive thought pattern called pessimism. This negative thinking poisoned what might have been a pretty good and opportunity-filled childhood, adolescence, and early adulthood. This pessimism created ceilings and walls where there really were none.

Throughout the period when I was ridden by pessimism, my life and I mostly stood still. Looking back, it was a terrible waste. If you are in pessimistic place, you don’t have to stay there for the rest of your life. I didn’t, for I learned to replace my negative thinking with optimism.

In this article I’ll explore nine positivity habits that have helped me to go from someone who was pessimistic most of the time to someone who is now optimistic almost all the time. I recommend to not try to add all the habits at one go but to choose one habit and to practice it for 30 days so it becomes a habit, before adding the next.

1. Ask Yourself the Right Questions

This is the simplest but perhaps also the most important habit I have discovered in adopting an optimistic mindset. The questions we ask ourselves day in and day out when we wind up in negative, difficult or uncertain situations make all the difference in our life.

A pessimist might ask him/herself questions like:

  • “Why did this happen to me?”
  • “Why do bad things happen to me all the time?”

But an optimist asks him/herself the questions that open up the mind to new viewpoints and possibilities. A few of my favorite questions for finding the optimistic perspective are:

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  • “What is one good thing about this situation?”
  • “What can I learn from this situation?”
  • “What is one small step I can take today to start solving this situation?”

2. Create a Positive Environment to Live In

The people you spend your time with and the information you let influence your mind will have a huge effect on your attitude and how you think about things.

Watch this YouTube video and learn the power of a positive environment:

So choose to:

  • Spend more time with the people who lift you up. And less time – or no time – with people who just bring you down by being negative and critical. Read: You are the Average of the 5 People You Spend the Most Time With
  • Let in the information that supports you. Spend less time on negative and self-esteem damaging media sources and spend more time reading positive and constructive blogs and books, watching motivating movies, listening to inspirational songs, and listening to audio books and podcasts created by optimistic people. Check out 12 Inspirational Movies With Important Life Lessons To Learn and 25 Most Inspirational Songs of All Time.

3. Be Grateful for What You Have (Don’t Forget About Yourself Too)

A very simple and quick way to boost the positive energy in your life is to tap into gratitude.

I usually do it by asking one or more of these questions:

  1. What can I be grateful for in my life today?
  2. Who are 3 people that I can be grateful to have in my life and why?
  3. What are 3 things I can be grateful for about myself?

Just spend 60 seconds or a few minutes during your day with answering one of these questions to reap the wonderful benefits.

4. Don’t Forget About Your Physical Self

Being an optimist isn’t just about thinking in a different way. It is also about caring for the physical part of ourselves.

I have found that working out a couple of times a week, enough quality sleep each night and eating healthy food has a huge effect on my mindset.

If I mismanage those very basic things then negative thoughts pop up far more often and I become more pessimistic and shut down about the possibilities in my life.

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So don’t neglect these basic fundamentals. Just caring for your physical self the right way can minimize a whole bunch of problems in life.

5. Start Your Day in an Optimistic Way

The way you start your morning can set the tone for the rest of your day. For example, a stress-free morning often leads to less stress during the rest of the day.

So how can you set an optimistic tone for your day?

A three-step combination that has worked very well for me is to ask myself a gratitude question during breakfast, read some positive information online or in a book very early in the morning and then follow that up with exercising.

This sets my mind on the right path and fills me up with energy for my day.

6. Focus on Solutions

A sure way to feel more negative about a situation is to sit around and do nothing about it. Instead, use the questions I shared in step one and open up your mind to the possibilities of the situation you are in.

If you have trouble to get started with taking action, ask yourself:

What is one small step I can take today to get the ball rolling?

Then take that small step forward. However small this step is, it can have a big effect in your mood and thoughts. If the step feels too big or it just makes you procrastinate, then ask yourself:

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What is an even smaller step I can take to move forward today?

The most important thing is to move forward, even if it’s a tiny baby step.

7. Reduce Your Worries

The worrying habit is a powerful and destructive one and can take over anyone’s thinking. It used to be one of my biggest obstacles to optimism and to moving forward in life.

Two effective steps that have helped me and still help me to this day to minimize the worries are:

  1. Ask yourself: how many of my worries ever happened in reality? If you are like me you will find that the answer is: very few. Most of the things you fear throughout your life will never happen. They are just nightmares or monsters in your own mind. This question can help you to do a reality check, to calm down and to realize that you have most likely just been building another imaginary nightmare.
  2. Focus on solutions and the action you can take. The worries grow stronger in a foggy mind and an inactive body. So use the questions in Steps 1 and 6 to move out of your worries and into resolution.

8. Don’t Let Ideals Ruin Things

A common mistake people make when making a shift in their attitudes is that they think that they have be perfect and do things perfectly all the time. This traps them from being positive.

Changing to a positive attitude can be gradual. While you may slip and stumble, continuing this way over time will strengthen your positive viewpoint more and more.

But if you set an inhuman standard for yourself and think you have to go from being a pessimist to always being an optimist, then you may find it hard to live up to that. And so you may feel like a failure. You get angry with yourself. And you may even give up on changing this habit and fall back into negative thinking.

So instead, focus on gradual change. If you are optimistic 40% of the time right now, try to improve this to being optimistic 60% of the time. Then, increase that to 80% when you are used to the new standard, then subsequently 100% if you can.

This focus on gradual improvement is far more sustainable and likely to bring long-term success than trying to reach an inhuman standard grounded in perfection.

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9. Finally, a Reminder to Help You to Not Give Up

I would like to end this article with a simple but powerful and timeless thought that comforted and encouraged me to continue on when things looked bleak.

That thought is: It is always darkest before the dawn.

This thought has helped me to hold on and keep going when my social skills and dating life was just plain bad. It has helped me to continue on in my online business when things looked like they would never pick up. It has helped me to put one foot over another even when things looked dark.

I have found this thought to be very true. Why? Because when things seemed to be at the lowest for my blog, business, dating life or life in general, something positive would always happened. That’s probably because being at a low point forced me to change how I did things.

But maybe also because life has a way of evening itself out when I go on. By taking action rather than give up, something good will always happens.

Seeing this thought live itself out has strengthened my belief in staying optimistic, in taking action and to keep going even when going through rough patches.

Re-syndicated 9 Simple Habits to Stay Positive in Life | Personal Excellence

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Featured photo credit: Allie Smith via unsplash.com

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