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10 Creative Ways To Comfort Without Speaking

10 Creative Ways To Comfort Without Speaking

There are many ways people go through a tough time, whether it is depression, anxiety, grieving.

There are many reasons people just feel off. So what do you do to comfort them?

Here are 10 creative ways to comfort without speaking.

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1. Comfort Food

This could be anything you know that person loves to eat. I hate to say this but I LOVE sweets! When I’m feeling down and someone brings be a bag of crispy M&M’s, or they have a tub of Ben & Jerry’s American Dream… I cannot help but give them a smile. Now if it was reversed and I was trying to comfort my daughter? She loves homemade food! It can be buttermilk biscuits and sausage gravy, tacos, cookies. Comfort foods were made for just that, comforting.

2. Hush the Mouth

I know that sounds harsh, because it probably is. If you are there to comfort your friend or loved one, then it’s not about you. Sometimes the best thing that you can do is be quiet and just sit there with them. This shows them that you have respect for them and that you really want to hear what they have to say; when they’re ready.

3. Patience

I know this one is hard to understand, let me explain it. Everyone goes through what is happening to them in their own time. If you were to show up huffing and puffing like the big bad wolf and it were me? I wouldn’t open up to you either. I get it, after a year and they are still moping around? Tough love might be good for them. If you show up two weeks after the incident and they are still laying on the couch and you want to be supportive? Suck it up buttercup you’re there for them remember?

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4. Hugs

Hugs are a great way to show comfort. I LOVE HUGS! This article from The Huffington Post by: Lindsay Homes, 7 Reasons Why We Should Be Giving More Hugs is a great example of why we should give out hugs as a silent comfort!

5. Warm Drinks

Sometimes it’s nice to be around people in a coffee shop. No one is talking to you but everyone is enjoying a warm drink (unless it’s summer). Examples of this are coffee, teas and cocoas. Does someone you know have the winter blues? How about mixing these tips and bringing them a basket with cookies AND their favorite type of coffee or cocoa? During the winter, one of the most comforting things for me is when it’s snowing outside to have a cup of coffee or tea in my hands. For my kids I make them cocoa, boil the water fill it up 1/4 to 1/2 the way, stir in the cocoa, then fill the rest of the way with milk. This makes it just warm enough to warm them up from playing in the snow, but not hot enough to scald their mouth.

6. Surprise Gifts

There is no need to say anything when you walk up to someone and leave them a basket of their favorite things. One example; your girlfriend just had a horrible break-up. What do you give someone for that? If it’s one of my buddies, I would throw together a basket with their favorite coffee, some creamer, different sweets, and a snuggly blanket, and a comedy (or a chick flick if they’re into that). No words needed.

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7. Charlie Chapman Style

Have you ever tried to be a mime? I’m not very good at it because I look like a frustrated ostrich. If my loved one is laughing and not crying? Mission accomplished! For my daughter, sometimes when she has had a bad day at school and she has a temper tantrum and isn’t intentionally trying to take it out on someone, I will show her what she looks like while doing it. Usually I get a laugh and a then she is okay, no it doesn’t always work. When I throw some humor on it and she starts laughing I know I’ve done something right.

8. Music

Music has always had a way to sooth the soul or the person for that matter. If you know the person that needs comfort and what they like for music, then it is almost as good as giving them a hug!

9. Get them out of the house

You don’t have to say anything when you get them out of the house. Go hop in the car throw their favorite tunes on and just drive. Sometimes this is what really does the trick for me.

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10. Just be there

I know that this sounds crazy, but sometimes if you just sit there and let someone know that you’re there it makes all of the difference in the world. I’m not someone who opens up easily. I can sit there and listen to your stories all day. It takes a really good friend to just sit there with me, not lecturing me, not saying anything, to get me to open up and let them comfort me.

There are so many other ways to comfort people through whatever type of time they are going through, these are just some of the basics and I hope that they bring you and your loved ones some comfort.

Featured photo credit: Pexels.com via pexels.com

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Last Updated on December 3, 2019

10 Life Lessons You’d Better Learn Early on in Life

10 Life Lessons You’d Better Learn Early on in Life

There are so many lessons I wish I had learned while I was young enough to appreciate and apply them. The thing with wisdom, and often with life lessons in general, is that they’re learned in retrospect, long after we needed them. The good news is that other people can benefit from our experiences and the lessons we’ve learned.

Here’re 10 important life lessons you should learn early on:

1. Money Will Never Solve Your Real Problems

Money is a tool; a commodity that buys you necessities and some nice “wants,” but it is not the panacea to your problems.

There are a great many people who are living on very little, yet have wonderfully full and happy lives… and there are sadly a great many people are living on quite a lot, yet have terribly miserable lives.

Money can buy a nice home, a great car, fabulous shoes, even a bit of security and some creature comforts, but it cannot fix a broken relationship, or cure loneliness, and the “happiness” it brings is only fleeting and not the kind that really and truly matters. Happiness is not for sale. If you’re expecting the “stuff” you can buy to “make it better,” you will never be happy.

2. Pace Yourself

Often when we’re young, just beginning our adult journey we feel as though we have to do everything at once. We need to decide everything, plan out our lives, experience everything, get to the top, find true love, figure out our life’s purpose, and do it all at the same time.

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Slow down—don’t rush into things. Let your life unfold. Wait a bit to see where it takes you, and take time to weigh your options. Enjoy every bite of food, take time to look around you, let the other person finish their side of the conversation. Allow yourself time to think, to mull a bit.

Taking action is critical. Working towards your goals and making plans for the future is commendable and often very useful, but rushing full-speed ahead towards anything is a one-way ticket to burnout and a good way to miss your life as it passes you by.

3. You Can’t Please Everyone

“I don’t know the secret to success, but the secret to failure is trying to please everyone” – Bill Cosby.

You don’t need everyone to agree with you or even like you. It’s human nature to want to belong, to be liked, respected and valued, but not at the expense of your integrity and happiness. Other people cannot give you the validation you seek. That has to come from inside.

Speak up, stick to your guns, assert yourself when you need to, demand respect, stay true to your values.

4. Your Health Is Your Most Valuable Asset

Health is an invaluable treasure—always appreciate, nurture, and protect it. Good health is often wasted on the young before they have a chance to appreciate it for what it’s worth.

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We tend to take our good health for granted, because it’s just there. We don’t have to worry about it, so we don’t really pay attention to it… until we have to.

Heart disease, bone density, stroke, many cancers—the list of many largely preventable diseases is long, so take care of your health now, or you’ll regret it later on.

5. You Don’t Always Get What You Want

“Life is what happens while you’re busy making other plans.” – John Lennon

No matter how carefully you plan and how hard you work, sometimes things just don’t work out the way you want them to… and that’s okay.

We have all of these expectations; predetermined visions of what our “ideal” life will look like, but all too often, that’s not the reality of the life we end up with. Sometimes our dreams fail and sometimes we just change our minds mid-course. Sometimes we have to flop to find the right course and sometimes we just have to try a few things before we find the right direction.

6. It’s Not All About You

You are not the epicenter of the universe. It’s very difficult to view the world from a perspective outside of your own, since we are always so focused on what’s happening in our own lives. What do I have to do today? What will this mean for me, for my career, for my life? What do I want?

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It’s normal to be intensely aware of everything that’s going on in your own life, but you need to pay as much attention to what’s happening around you, and how things affect other people in the world as you do to your own life. It helps to keep things in perspective.

7. There’s No Shame in Not Knowing

No one has it all figured out. Nobody has all the answers. There’s no shame in saying “I don’t know.” Pretending to be perfect doesn’t make you perfect. It just makes you neurotic to keep up the pretense of manufactured perfection.

We have this idea that there is some kind of stigma or shame in admitting our limitations or uncertainly, but we can’t possibly know everything. We all make mistakes and mess up occasionally. We learn as we go, that’s life.

Besides—nobody likes a know-it-all. A little vulnerability makes you human and oh so much more relatable.

8. Love Is More Than a Feeling; It’s a Choice

That burst of initial exhilaration, pulse quickening love and passion does not last long. But that doesn’t mean long-lasting love is not possible.

Love is not just a feeling; it’s a choice that you make every day. We have to choose to let annoyances pass, to forgive, to be kind, to respect, to support, to be faithful.

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Relationships take work. Sometimes it’s easy and sometimes it’s incredibly hard. It is up to us to choose how we want to act, think and speak in a relationship.

9. Perspective Is a Beautiful Thing

Typically, when we’re worried or upset, it’s because we’ve lost perspective. Everything that is happening in our lives seems so big, so important, so do or die, but in the grand picture, this single hiccup often means next to nothing.

The fight we’re having, the job we didn’t get, the real or imagined slight, the unexpected need to shift course, the thing we wanted, but didn’t get. Most of it won’t matter 20, 30, 40 years from now. It’s hard to see long term when all you know is short term, but unless it’s life-threatening, let it go, and move on.

10. Don’t Take Anything for Granted

We often don’t appreciate what we have until it’s gone: that includes your health, your family and friends, your job, the money you have or think you will have tomorrow.

When you’re young, it seems that your parents will always be there, but they won’t. You think you have plenty of time to get back in touch with your old friends or spend time with new ones, but you don’t. You have the money to spend, or you think you’ll have it next month, but you might not.

Nothing in your life is not guaranteed to be there tomorrow, including those you love.

This is a hard life lesson to learn, but it may be the most important of all: Life can change in an instant. Make sure you appreciate what you have, while you still have it.

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Featured photo credit: Ben Eaton via unsplash.com

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