Advertising
Advertising

10 Creative Ways To Make Your Neighborhood A More Lovely Place This New Year

10 Creative Ways To Make Your Neighborhood A More Lovely Place This New Year

Let’s be honest, most of us don’t know our neighbors. In a culture that is so digitally connected, more basic, everyday connections (like with physical neighbors) have become less of a priority. But caring for and taking pride in your neighborhood will make living there a much lovelier experience. Here are some ways that you can make your neighborhood a lovelier place to be in 2016.

1. Know your neighbors

It sounds simple. Getting to know your neighbors is so foundational, yet so easy to push to the back burner of life’s constant demands. With far-reaching social networks and the ability to communicate easily and quickly with friends and family from different neighborhoods, then what’s the hurry? But getting to know your neighbors will create a sense of community that goes beyond sharing a street. It will make a big difference if you are able to greet your neighbors on the sidewalk by name and ask them about their specific job or hobby.

2. Serve your neighborhood in all seasons

There will always be a need for sidewalks to be swept, hedges to be trimmed, and lawns to be mowed. There was a woman in a Chicago neighborhood who decided to take the day off work and shovel the entire block to make parking spaces available during a snow storm. She blessed her neighborhood and said that, “the look of awe on people’s faces was rewarding.”

Advertising

Serve your neighborhood and not only will your neighbors feel blessed, but you will feel blessed by the shock and gratitude that people in the twenty-first century feel when they see displays of selflessness.

3. Start a neighborhood tradition

Growing up, my neighborhood always had a Halloween parade where all the kids could show off their costumes, eat hot dogs, and begin trick-or-treating all together. It was such a fun time to meet other kids and it turned a holiday that individual families celebrated into something that created unity within our larger community. Start a Spring Garage Sale day, or a fourth of July block party. Beginning a tradition that people can look forward to and plan every year will make people feel more invested in your area.

4. Breed some healthy competition

There are two things that bring people together the most — a common enemy and some healthy competition. Begin a low stakes competition for the best kept lawn or the most festive holiday decorations. Host the final vote at your house and provide wine and cookies. People will devote their time and energy to winning, while simultaneously boosting the curb appeal of your neighborhood.

Advertising

5. Start a Block Watch

Speaking of common enemies, coordinating an effort to keep your neighborhood safe will benefit everyone in the area. Look up various ways to run a neighborhood watch and decide what is best for your community. Volunteer to be the point person in coordinating meetings or watch shifts. A safe neighborhood is a happy neighborhood.

6. Celebrate the kids in the community

Odds are that there are some children in your community. It might be easy to brush off children as simple de facto members of a community, but children are really the lifeblood of a neighborhood. They are the ones spending the most time outside playing. They probably have the most connections with their neighbors and they probably know the neighborhood better than most adult members do. Plan a back-to-school party or a giant birthday party for all the kids in the neighborhood. Make the littlest members of your community feel loved and seen.

7. Develop community spaces

Start a community garden or coordinate a more intentional play space for children in a cul-de-sac or court. Fostering the creation of spaces that members of the community have a vested interest in will create pride and connection in your neighborhood. It will also provide more opportunities for members of the neighborhood to run into each other and get to know one another.

Advertising

8. Focus on communication

It is easy to become isolated from your neighbors without a clear method of communication. If your neighbors are comfortable with it, compile a list of names, addresses, and numbers that can be emailed to the whole block. Or start a Facebook group where members of the community can interact, post photos, and make announcements about upcoming neighborhood events. Whatever way you choose, make sure all members of the community are included. Excluding certain neighbors will only drive wedges between your neighbors and make your neighborhood a more hostile place to live.

9. Start a “Care Watch” Committee

Similar to a Block Watch, this group of people will respond where there is a tragedy or a time when a member of the community is in need. If someone experiences a loss or has a child, the Care Watch Committee organizes a meal train to deliver meals to the family for a few weeks. Also, if someone is injured, the Care Watch Committee could organize members of the community to help out with yard work or simple everyday tasks. Having this safety net built into your neighborhood will make members feel safer and more cared for in their home.

10. Do unto others as you would have done unto you

The Golden Rule is a cliché for a reason — it works. If you want your neighborhood to be a much lovelier place to live this New Year, then begin treating the people around you how you would want to be treated. Help people with their groceries. Pick up trash in the street. Send Birthday cards. Cook people dinner. Be a servant to the people around you and your neighborhood will be transformed by selflessness and love.

Advertising

Featured photo credit: Loren Kerns via flickr.com

More by this author

Emily Myrin

Copywriter

Teens Come In Just To Sit In The Cars And Take Pictures At A Luxury Car Dealership. This Man Treated Them In A Clever Way Pregnancy At Week 34 Pregnancy At Week 26 Pregnancy At Week 29 10 Creative Ways To Make Your Neighborhood A More Lovely Place This New Year

Trending in Communication

1 How To Spot Fake People (And Ways To Deal With Them) 2 How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide) 3 The Hidden Power of Every Single Person Around You 4 The Purpose Of Friendship: The Only 4 Types Of Friends You Need In Life 5 14 Things That Make You Happy and Enjoy Life More

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Published on May 4, 2021

How To Spot Fake People (And Ways To Deal With Them)

How To Spot Fake People (And Ways To Deal With Them)

They say we are the average of the five persons we spend the most time with. For a minute, consider the people around you. Are they truly who your “tribe” should be or who you aspire to become in the future? Are they really genuine people who want to see you succeed? Or are they fake people who don’t really want to see you happy?

In this article, I’ll review why it is important to surround yourself with genuine individuals—the ones who care, bring something to our table, and first and foremost, who leave all fakeness behind.

How to Spot Fake People?

When you’ve been working in the helping professions for a while, spotting fake people gets a bit easier. There are some very clear signs that the person you are looking at is hiding something, acting somehow, or simply wanting to get somewhere. Most often, there is a secondary gain—perhaps attention, sympathy, or even a promotion.

Whatever it is, you’re better off working their true agenda and staying the hell away. Here are some things you should look out for to help spot fake people.

1. Full of Themselves

Fake people like to show off. They love looking at themselves in the mirror. They collect photos and videos of every single achievement they had and every part of their body and claim to be the “best at what they do.”

Most of these people are actually not that good in real life. But they act like they are and ensure that they appear better than the next person. The issue for you is that you may find yourself always feeling “beneath” them and irritated at their constant need to be in the spotlight.

2. Murky in Expressing Their Emotions

Have you ever tried having a deep and meaningful conversation with a fake person? It’s almost impossible. It’s because they have limited emotional intelligence and don’t know how they truly feel deep down—and partly because they don’t want to have their true emotions exposed, no matter how normal these might be.

Advertising

It’s much harder to say “I’m the best at what I do” while simultaneously sharing “average” emotions with “equal” people.

3. Zero Self-Reflection

To grow, we must accept feedback from others. We must be open to our strengths and to our weaknesses. We must accept that we all come in different shapes and can always improve.

Self-reflection requires us to think, forgive, admit fault, and learn from our mistakes. But to do that, we have to be able to adopt a level of genuineness and depth that fake people don’t routinely have. A fake person generally never apologizes, but when they do, it is often followed with a “but” in the next breath.

4. Unrealistic Perceptions

Fake people most often have an unrealistic perception of the world—things that they want to portray to others (pseudo achievements, materialistic gains, or a made-up sense of happiness) or simply how they genuinely regard life outside themselves.

A lot of fake people hide pain, shame, and other underlying reasons in their behavior. This could explain why they can’t be authentic and/or have difficulties seeing their environment for the way it objectively is (both good and bad).

5. Love Attention

As I mentioned earlier, the biggest sign that something isn’t quite right with someone’s behavior can be established by how much they love attention. Are you being interrupted every time you speak by someone who wants to make sure that the spotlight gets reverted back to them? Is the focus always on them, no matter the topic? If yes, you’re probably dealing with a fake person.

6. People Pleaser

Appreciation feels nice but having everyone like you is even better. While it is completely unrealistic for most people to please everyone all the time, fake people seem to always say yes in pursuit of constant approval.

Advertising

Now, this is a problem for two reasons. Firstly, these people are simply saying yes to things for their own satisfaction. Secondly, they often end up changing their minds or retracting their offer for one reason or another (“I would have loved to, but my grandmother suddenly fell ill.”), leaving you in the lurch for the 100th time this year.

7. Sarcasm and Cynicism

Behind the chronic pasted smile, fake people are well known for brewing resentment, jealousy, or anger. This is because, behind the postcard life, they are often unhappy. Sarcasm and cynicism are well known to act as a defense mechanism, sometimes even a diversion—anything so they can remain feeling on top of the world, whether it is through boosting themselves or bringing people down.

8. Crappy friend

Fake people are bad friends. They don’t listen to you, your feelings, and whatever news you might have to share. In fact, you might find yourself migrating away from them when you have exciting or bad news to share, knowing that it will always end up one way—their way. In addition, you might find that they’re not available when you truly need them or worse, cancel plans at the last minute.

It’s not unusual to hear that a fake person talks constantly behind people’s backs. Let’s be honest, if they do it to others, they’re doing it to you too. If your “friend” makes you feel bad constantly, trust me, they’re not achieving their purpose, and they’re simply not a good person to have around.

The sooner you learn to spot these fake people, the sooner you can meet meaningful individuals again.

How to Cope With Fake People Moving Forward?

It is important to remind yourself that you deserve more than what you’re getting. You are worthy, valuable, precious, and just as important as the next person.

There are many ways to manage fake people. Here are some tips on how to deal with them.

Advertising

1. Boundaries

Keep your boundaries very clear. As explained in the book Unlock Your Resilience, boundaries are what keep you sane when the world tries to suffocate you. When fake people become emotional vampires, make sure to keep your distances, limit contact, and simply replace them with more valuable interactions.

2. Don’t Take Their Behavior Personally

Sadly, they most likely have behaved this way before they knew you and will continue much longer after you have moved on. It isn’t about you. It is about their inner need to meet a void that you are not responsible for. And in all honesty, unless you are a trained professional, you are unlikely to improve it anyway.

3. Be Upfront and Honest About How You Feel

If your “friend” has been hurtful or engaged in behaviors you struggle with, let them know—nicely, firmly, however you want, but let them know that they are affecting you. If it works, great. If it doesn’t, you’ll feel better and when you’re ready to move on, you’ll know you tried to reach out. Your conscience is clear.

4. Ask for Advice

If you’re unsure about what you’re seeing or feeling, ask for advice. Perhaps a relative, a good friend, or a colleague might have some input as to whether you are overreacting or seeing some genuine concerns.

Now, don’t confuse asking for advice with gossiping behind the fake person’s back because, in the end, you don’t want to stoop down to their level. However, a little reminder as to how to stay on your own wellness track can never hurt.

5. Dig Deeper

Now, this one, I offer with caution. If you are emotionally strong, up to it, guaranteed you won’t get sucked into it, and have the skills to manage, perhaps you could dig into the reasons a fake person is acting the way they do.

Have they suffered recent trauma? Have they been rejected all their lives? Is their self-esteem so low that they must resort to making themselves feel good in any way they can? Sometimes, having an understanding of a person’s behavior can help in processing it.

Advertising

6. Practice Self-Care!

Clearly, putting some distance between the fake person and yourself is probably the way to go. However, sometimes, it takes time to get there. In the meantime, make sure to practice self-care, be gentle with yourself, and compensate with lots of positives!

Self-care can be as simple as taking a hot shower after talking to them or declining an invitation when you’re not feeling up to the challenge.

Spotting fake people isn’t too hard. They generally glow with wanna-be vibes. However, most often, there are reasons as to why they are like this. Calling their behavior might be the first step. Providing them with support might be the second. But if these don’t work, it’s time to stay away and surround yourself with the positivity that you deserve.

Final Thoughts

Remember that life is a rollercoaster. It has good moments, tough moments, and moments you wouldn’t change for the world. So, look around and make sure that you take the time to choose the right people to share it all with.

We are the average of the five people we spend the most time with, so take a good look around and choose wisely!

More Tips on Dealing With Fake People

Featured photo credit: Priscilla Du Preez via unsplash.com

Read Next