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How To Stop Worrying And Start Living

How To Stop Worrying And Start Living

While it’s all too easy to sink into despair, a pattern of worrying is harmful for you and anyone around you. To avoid worrying excessively and obsessively, check out these tips for how to stop holding yourself back and begin to actually live your life.

1. Instead of imagining worries, imagine possibilities

Remember that life is short, and time spent worrying is time wasted. Think of all the things you’ll get to do once you finally stop worrying. Realize how free you’re going to be. You want to run towards that, not walk. Enjoy your sprint and look forward to all kinds of new possibilities that lie beyond the checkered tape.

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2. Be yourself: “Nothing can bring you peace but yourself.”

One of the best guidebooks to realizing that worrying is a useless, harmful endeavor is named, fittingly enough, How to Stop Worrying and Start Living. One of its best quotes is, “Nothing can bring you peace but yourself.”

You’ll face inner turmoil if you try to be anyone other than yourself. Besides that truth, there is the fact that not many people can pull off the facade. There aren’t many with good enough acting skills, and even the ones who possess them aren’t happy in their self-imposed roles.

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3. Learn apathy

There’s a lot of focus on learning empathy so you care more about other people. But apathy is equally important, if not more so, in regards to your personal wellbeing. Apathy is defined as “a lack of interest, enthusiasm and concern.” To stop worrying, you should focus on that third part. The less you concern yourself with what others are thinking or even saying about you, the less weight you’re putting on yourself.

4. Feel good about yourself

This sounds obvious, but far more people fail this test than pass it. Take pride in who you are, and don’t dwell on what you’re not. Others in your life, like parents, siblings, and friends, are surely already proud of you, so all you have to do is stop worrying and mimic their attitudes.

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5. Don’t force things, let them happen naturally

When we’re anxious for something, like the start a new romantic relationship, we wait and wait for something to happen. That leads to excessive worrying that it will never come to pass. It’s far better to keep those thoughts out of your head and just let things happen when they happen. It’s common knowledge that you’ll often find your soulmate around when you finally stop looking. The same philosophy applies to other matters, too. As long as you keep applying, you’re just as likely to find a job you enjoy by not worrying so much about it.

6. Don’t hate

How to Stop Worrying and Start Living states, “When we hate our enemies, we are giving them power over us: power over our sleep, our appetites, our blood pressure, our health, and our happiness.”

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Not only do the people who wronged us not deserve to (often unknowingly) hold that power, you shouldn’t have to sacrifice it. Hatred can only serve as an engine for more hate. Worrying and being proven correct may justify hate in your eyes, but remember that you are, as the saying goes, only drinking poison and expecting it to kill your enemy.

7. Believe in something bigger than yourself

If you focus on solely you and your life, you will constantly be worrying and not have the energy to do much else. By embracing a higher power, you healthily distract yourself from your negative thoughts. And that higher power doesn’t need to be a god or a religion! It’s whatever you put stock in, whether that’s family, friendship, honesty, goodwill, or something else entirely. To stop worrying so much, you simply need a purpose that goes beyond just your needs.

Featured photo credit: Do Not Worry/Andy Rennie via flickr.com

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Matt OKeefe

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Last Updated on August 16, 2018

10 Ways To Step Out Of Your Comfort Zone And Enjoy Taking Risks

10 Ways To Step Out Of Your Comfort Zone And Enjoy Taking Risks

The ability to take risks by stepping outside your comfort zone is the primary way by which we grow. But we are often afraid to take that first step.

In truth, comfort zones are not really about comfort, they are about fear. Break the chains of fear to get outside. Once you do, you will learn to enjoy the process of taking risks and growing in the process.

Here are 10 ways to help you step out of your comfort zone and get closer to success:

1. Become aware of what’s outside of your comfort zone

What are the things that you believe are worth doing but are afraid of doing yourself because of the potential for disappointment or failure?

Draw a circle and write those things down outside the circle. This process will not only allow you to clearly identify your discomforts, but your comforts. Write identified comforts inside the circle.

2. Become clear about what you are aiming to overcome

Take the list of discomforts and go deeper. Remember, the primary emotion you are trying to overcome is fear.

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How does this fear apply uniquely to each situation? Be very specific.

Are you afraid of walking up to people and introducing yourself in social situations? Why? Is it because you are insecure about the sound of your voice? Are you insecure about your looks?

Or, are you afraid of being ignored?

3. Get comfortable with discomfort

One way to get outside of your comfort zone is to literally expand it. Make it a goal to avoid running away from discomfort.

Let’s stay with the theme of meeting people in social settings. If you start feeling a little panicked when talking to someone you’ve just met, try to stay with it a little longer than you normally would before retreating to comfort. If you stay long enough and practice often enough, it will start to become less uncomfortable.

4. See failure as a teacher

Many of us are so afraid of failure that we would rather do nothing than take a shot at our dreams.

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Begin to treat failure as a teacher. What did you learn from the experience? How can you take that lesson to your next adventure to increase your chance of success?

Many highly successful people failed plenty of times before they succeeded. Here’re some examples:

10 Famous Failures to Success Stories That Will Inspire You to Carry On

5. Take baby steps

Don’t try to jump outside your comfort zone, you will likely become overwhelmed and jump right back in.

Take small steps toward the fear you are trying to overcome. If you want to do public speaking, start by taking every opportunity to speak to small groups of people. You can even practice with family and friends.

Take a look at this article on how you can start taking baby steps:

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The Number One Secret to Life Success: Baby Steps

6. Hang out with risk takers

There is no substitute for this step. If you want to become better at something, you must start hanging out with the people who are doing what you want to do and start emulating them. (Here’re 8 Reasons Why Risk Takers Are More Likely To Be Successful).

Almost inevitably, their influence will start have an effect on your behavior.

7. Be honest with yourself when you are trying to make excuses

Don’t say “Oh, I just don’t have the time for this right now.” Instead, be honest and say “I am afraid to do this.”

Don’t make excuses, just be honest. You will be in a better place to confront what is truly bothering you and increase your chance of moving forward.

8. Identify how stepping out will benefit you

What will the ability to engage in public speaking do for your personal and professional growth? Keep these potential benefits in mind as motivations to push through fear.

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9. Don’t take yourself too seriously

Learn to laugh at yourself when you make mistakes. Risk taking will inevitably involve failure and setbacks that will sometimes make you look foolish to others. Be happy to roll with the punches when others poke fun.

If you aren’t convinced yet, check out these 6 Reasons Not to Take Life So Seriously.

10. Focus on the fun

Enjoy the process of stepping outside your safe boundaries. Enjoy the fun of discovering things about yourself that you may not have been aware of previously.

Featured photo credit: Unsplash via unsplash.com

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