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Understanding and Dealing with a Difficult Boss

Understanding and Dealing with a Difficult Boss

We’ve all had one: a difficult boss. The difficult boss is one who sets a negative tone by being unapproachable, overly busy, and emphasizing the wrong things. These managers will likely fail in their duties at some point because of these traits, but in the meantime, their employees have to deal with them. Instead of simply sighing and going about your business, there are better ways of dealing with a manager who is difficult.

1. You Must Look Inward

First and foremost, you should see if the reason your boss is being difficult relates to you being difficult. Your boss may be acting or appearing busy every time you need help because you are constantly seeking help or approval. If you just started your job, that’s understandable. If you’ve been there for nearly a decade, it’s probably time to cut the cord.

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What if your boss is responding to you with snark, and not the fun kind, and you’ve noticed that she’s not like that with anyone else she manages? Maybe it’s your attitude and not hers. If it’s just this week, look for ways to adjust your attitude. A more regular occurrence? Then it’s time to seek more permanent solutions, like learning to cultivate your emotional intelligence (EQ) in order to better respond to your boss. Well-honed EQ can turn you from the employee your boss loathes into a great leader among your peers.

Try something even more radical. Change your diet. The foods we eat directly affect our health, both physical and mental. It’s a circle. Turn it from a vicious one to a virtuous one.

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2. You Must Try a Little Empathy

This might be hard for us to do when the issue is with our boss. If you’ve seen your boss treat others the way he treats you, it’s probably safe to pin an issue on your boss and not you. That’s always the worry when we have difficult interactions with people. We’re paranoid it’s us not them.

When you’ve established that your boss is the difficult one, you may have a hard time being empathic, but walking a mile in someone else’s proverbial shoes is an effective business tool. If you truly do need help, but your boss dismisses you because of yet another meeting, think about this: unless you work for the CEO, your boss has a boss too. Your boss may not be as in control of her schedule as you think she is.

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Take a deep breath and be proactive about making time with your boss to speak with her, not talk at her. If you have to schedule time on her calendar, so be it. That will get you started, and then you can tell her how you feel.

3. You Should Be the Peacemaker

Don’t be a peacekeeper. There’s a big difference. Being a peacemaker means being proactive in how you deal with people who make life at work difficult, from your boss to the office gossip. Peacekeepers keep to themselves and let the world of work pass them by; they let others do the dirty work. Office peacemakers don’t just make peace between themselves and their difficult bosses. Peacemakers are not afraid of ruffling a few feathers among peers in order to make the culture of the entire office a better place.

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There are seven important things a peacemaker does to maintain empathy and a health culture at work. Among those are recognizing that the solution to the problem could benefit the person with the issue. Another is using neutral ground, not the office, to have discussions about an issue. A third is choosing one issue, if there are many, on which to focus a discussion. Peacemaking is often most successful when clarity can be maintained. Muddying the waters is only going to make your boss more difficult.

4. You Must Cut and Run

Sometimes, you can only make so much peace before it’s time to get the hell out from under the tyranny of a difficult boss. You can only be so empathetic before it starts to seriously affect your mental health. Not only that, but that manager whose schedule is so busy she can’t find time to address your needs? Her lack of focus may well lead to the business’s failure. Get out while you can.

Featured photo credit: discussion/Nicolas Alejandro Street Photography via flickr.com

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H. E. James

Writer and researcher

Fashion As Comfort: Using Clothes To Heal I Work in Healthcare; Can I Work from Home, Too? Better Office Setups for Better Office Health Understanding and Dealing with a Difficult Boss How Clever People Deal With Rude People (Instead Of Getting Angry With Them)

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Last Updated on December 2, 2018

7 Public Speaking Techniques To Help Connect With Your Audience

7 Public Speaking Techniques To Help Connect With Your Audience

When giving a presentation or speech, you have to engage your audience effectively in order to truly get your point across. Unlike a written editorial or newsletter, your speech is fleeting; once you’ve said everything you set out to say, you don’t get a second chance to have your voice heard in that specific arena.

You need to make sure your audience hangs on to every word you say, from your introduction to your wrap-up. You can do so by:

1. Connecting them with each other

Picture your typical rock concert. What’s the first thing the singer says to the crowd after jumping out on stage? “Hello (insert city name here)!” Just acknowledging that he’s coherent enough to know where he is is enough for the audience to go wild and get into the show.

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It makes each individual feel as if they’re a part of something bigger. The same goes for any public speaking event. When an audience hears, “You’re all here because you care deeply about wildlife preservation,” it gives them a sense that they’re not just there to listen, but they’re there to connect with the like-minded people all around them.

2. Connect with their emotions

Speakers always try to get their audience emotionally involved in whatever topic they’re discussing. There are a variety of ways in which to do this, such as using statistics, stories, pictures or videos that really show the importance of the topic at hand.

For example, showing pictures of the aftermath of an accident related to drunk driving will certainly send a specific message to an audience of teenagers and young adults. While doing so might be emotionally nerve-racking to the crowd, it may be necessary to get your point across and engage them fully.

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3. Keep going back to the beginning

Revisit your theme throughout your presentation. Although you should give your audience the credit they deserve and know that they can follow along, linking back to your initial thesis can act as a subconscious reminder of why what you’re currently telling them is important.

On the other hand, if you simply mention your theme or the point of your speech at the beginning and never mention it again, it gives your audience the impression that it’s not really that important.

4. Link to your audience’s motivation

After you’ve acknowledged your audience’s common interests in being present, discuss their motivation for being there. Be specific. Using the previous example, if your audience clearly cares about wildlife preservation, discuss what can be done to help save endangered species’ from extinction.

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Don’t just give them cold, hard facts; use the facts to make a point that they can use to better themselves or the world in some way.

5. Entertain them

While not all speeches or presentations are meant to be entertaining in a comedic way, audiences will become thoroughly engaged in anecdotes that relate to the overall theme of the speech. We discussed appealing to emotions, and that’s exactly what a speaker sets out to do when he tells a story from his past or that of a well-known historical figure.

Speakers usually tell more than one story in order to show that the first one they told isn’t simply an anomaly, and that whatever outcome they’re attempting to prove will consistently reoccur, given certain circumstances.

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6. Appeal to loyalty

Just like the musician mentioning the town he’s playing in will get the audience ready to rock, speakers need to appeal to their audience’s loyalty to their country, company, product or cause. Show them how important it is that they’re present and listening to your speech by making your words hit home to each individual.

In doing so, the members of your audience will feel as if you’re speaking directly to them while you’re addressing the entire crowd.

7. Tell them the benefits of the presentation

Early on in your presentation, you should tell your audience exactly what they’ll learn, and exactly how they’ll learn it. Don’t expect them to listen if they don’t have clear-cut information to listen for. On the other hand, if they know what to listen for, they’ll be more apt to stay engaged throughout your entire presentation so they don’t miss anything.

Featured photo credit: Flickr via farm4.staticflickr.com

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