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12 Moments You Feel Grateful For Having A Close Female Friendship

12 Moments You Feel Grateful For Having A Close Female Friendship

Friendships are hard. They require unconditional love and a lot of devotion, but each emotional investment you make in this relationship has a way of coming back to you when you need it the most. Although all friendships are different and unique, we can all agree that there are certain characteristics that distinguish female from male friendships, right?

Somehow, the whole world came to realize that female friendships are insincere and superficial, but I’d have to strongly disagree. Unlike boys, girls tend to get more emotionally involved and I believe that that’s what makes female friendships more turbulent. Fights and makeups are generally louder and with more tears, which is where this stereotype comes from.

All of you out there who are lucky to have a BFF will most definitely recognize precious moments I found to be the core of female friendship, and I’m sure you’ll have more than a couple of things of your own to add here.

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1. A Secret Language

People say twins can be weird because they sort of create a world of their own, but they are no stranger than BFFs. The fact is that most girls talk a lot – and I mean a lot – but sometimes just a look is enough. However, you’d be foolish to think that’s an everyday ordinary look girls are exchanging. Years and years of practice led us to the moment when a minor difference in a facial expression can add a whole new meaning to the situation.

But that’s far from all – I’m sure that every female friendship is programmed to react on at least one keyword, no matter if it’s the notorious nickname of an ex-boyfriend or a euphemism for “save me now”. It’s like constantly reading between the lines, and most of those lines aren’t simple to decode.

2. Confessions

There’s probably isn’t a situation that makes a person feel more accepted than the moment when you make a confession without being judged or having that awful guilt feeling. Girls do this all the time, and they do so elaborately. This is like therapy, because it helps you deal with your conscience, for me at least.

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3. Breakups

Well, this one is not a particularly positive moment, but it’s inevitable, really – relationships end and that’s a fact. However, having to go through a breakup is somewhat easier when you know that there will be someone who will pick up the broken pieces and put them back together. It doesn’t really matter if you and your BFF decide to go with ice-cream and wine or clubbing, the point is quite the same.

4. Trash Talking

Speaking of breakups – that bitter aftertaste is only natural and it’s important to get it out. That’s what friends are for; I don’t believe there’s a person other than your best friend who’d know what things to say and which exact words to use in order to make you feel better by… well basically, by making your ex look worse. Trash talking isn’t something any of us are proud of, but it’s kind of an essential part of getting over someone. We know men do it, too, just not quite the same way.

5. Shopping

Being friends for that long usually results in you knowing each other’s bodies well and understanding what flatters them. Combining that with detailed knowledge of current trends makes shopping a whole lot easier – it’s like you’re a fashion duo that has a doctor’s degree in finding perfect outfits for any occasion. A quite practical side of having a BFF, isn’t it?

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6. Texting

The thing with female friendships is that they are codependent, at least most of them. But a bit of mental instability is nothing compared to sharing every minute you want to with your BFF by texting. Everyday things and huge events in our lives become real the moment we tell them to our friend, and that’s when they gain their true significance. No matter what’s going on, texting throughout the entire day simply makes it better. It’s like never being alone.

7. Inside Jokes

Having a sense of humor that another person in this world fully understands is priceless. It’s a whole new level of feeling appreciated and like you belong with someone. Whether they are practical, intellectual, petty or sarcastic, inside jokes are one of those small things that really make life worth living. It’s a way for two people to express themselves simultaneously, and it’s pretty awesome.

8. Moving

Getting a new place is usually overwhelming and time-consuming, and it’s a cause of stress that seems to be never-ending. Having your bestie at your side at that moment is very reassuring – there’s some thorough cleaning that needs to be done, additional shopping for all sorts of products and pieces of furniture, and so on. Besides, asking someone else for help may just creating more work for you – considering the fact that your two minds think alike, your BFF and you will be a lot more productive.

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9. Sincere Advice

The truth may sometimes hurt, but it’s not like it will become any less of a fact if you decide to ignore it. Some of them may go unspoken, but recognized, while others simply must be told out loud, so you can go through a healthy reality check, and that’s when your bestie comes in. It’s usually not pleasant nor easy, but admit it – you love your BFF and her moments of sincerity.

10. The “No Matter What” Vow

Whether you two decided to go with a magical ritual or if it goes without saying, the “no matter what” vow is a big part of every female friendship. It’s a safety net, and no matter what you do or where life takes you, you know that you’ll always have a home wherever your BFF is.

It’s a short list of what makes us feel grateful for having a bestie, I know, but I believe it’s universal. This is a relationship that needs to be nurtured and cherished, but it’s eternally worth it. What would you add to my list?

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Last Updated on October 14, 2020

Had a Bad Day? 7 Ways to Rebound From It and Feel Good Again

Had a Bad Day? 7 Ways to Rebound From It and Feel Good Again

Today didn’t turn out as you planned, but it doesn’t mean you’re weak. It simply means that you’re human, and you’re not bad just because you had a bad day.

“Not everyday is a good day but there is something good in every day.” -Alice Morse Earle

It’s not the end of the world when you find yourself thinking “I had a bad day,” but it can feel like it. You may have had plans that fell apart, experiences that set you back, and interactions that only did harm.

You may have started the day thinking you could take on it all, only to find you could hardly get out of bed. When you have a bad day, you can forget to look at the good.

Sometimes, self-care helps us to remember why we are worth it. It helps us to recharge and reset our mindset. It helps us to know that there are still options and that the day isn’t over yet.

Love yourself today, no matter how hard it’s been. That’s the way to find yourself amidst the hardships you have. That’s how you center yourself and regain focus and live a more meaningful life. Give yourself some credit and compassion.

Here are 7 ways to rebound from a bad day using self-compassion as a tool. If you had a bad day, these are for you!

1. Make a Gratitude List

In a study on gratitude, psychologists Dr. Robert A Emmons and Dr. Michael E. McCullough conducted an experiment where one group of people wrote out gratitude lists for ten weeks while another group wrote about irritations. The study found that the group that wrote about gratitude reported more optimistic mindsets in their lives[1].

Overall, having a gratitude list improved well-being and made one truly grateful by counting the blessings in their lives.

Write a list of what you are grateful for if you had a bad day. Make it as long as you like, but also remember to note why you’re grateful for each thing you write.

What has given you the most joy? What has set you up for better days? Keep a tally of triumphs in mind, especially when you do have the bad days.

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The day doesn’t define you, and you still have things of value that surround you. These could be material things, spiritual connections and experiences, relationships, basic needs, emotional and mental well-being, physical health, progress towards hopes and dreams, or simply being alive.

Here are some other simple ways to practice gratitude.

2. Write in a Journal

Journaling affects your overall mental health, which also affects physical health and aids in the management of stress, depression, anxiety, and more[2].

All you need is a pen and paper, or you could do an online, password-protected journal such as Penzu. The key is to get started and not pressure yourself on how polished or perfect it is. You don’t need to have prior experience to start journal writing. Just start.

Write out everything that is bothering you for 15 minutes. This helps with rumination, processing problems, and can even aid with brainstorming solutions.

However you approach it, you can find patterns of thinking that no longer serve you and start to transform your overall mental state. This will impact all areas of your life and is a great coping skill.

3. Meditate

Meditation can help you overcome negative thought patterns, worrying about the future, dwelling on the past, or struggling to overcome a bad day[3]. It shifts your mentality and helps you focus on the present or any one thing you truly want to focus on.

Here is an example of a meditation you can do:

Get into a comfortable position. Close your eyes. Rest your body, release tension, and unclench your jaw. Tighten and release each muscle group in a body scan for progressive muscle relaxation.

Focus on your breath, taking a few deep breaths. Let your belly expand when you breathe in for diaphragmatic breathing. Empty yourself completely of air, then return to normal breathing.

Next, focus on the idea of self-love and let it erase negative thoughts. Think about the ways you’ve been judging yourself, with the narratives coming up that your mind may create.

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Give yourself unconditional love and release judgment. Take your time meditating on this because you matter. This is particularly important if you had a bad day.

Check out this article for more on how to get started with a meditation practice.

4. Do Child’s Pose

Yoga Outlet says:

“Child’s Pose is a simple way to calm your mind, slow your breath, and restore a feeling of peace and safety. Practicing the pose before bedtime can help to release the worries of the day. Practicing in the morning can you help transition from sleeping to waking.”[4]

When you do Child’s Pose, it can be between difficult positions in yoga, or it can be anytime you feel you need a rest. It helps you recover from difficulties and relax the mind.

It also has the physical health benefits of elongating your back, opening your hips, and helping with digestion[5].

To do Child’s Pose, rest your buttocks back on your feet, knees on the floor. Elongate your body over your knees with both arms extended or tucked back, with head and neck resting on the floor[6].

Had a bad day? Try Child's Pose.

     

    Do this pose as a gift to yourself. You are allowing yourself to heal, rest, get time for yourself, recover, and recharge. When you’ve had a bad day, it’s there waiting for you.

    5. Try Positive Self-Talk

    Engage in positive self-talk. This is essentially choosing your thoughts.

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    When you have a negative thought, such as “I can’t do this,” replace it consciously with the thought “I can do this.” Give yourself positive affirmations to help with this.

    Negative self-talk fits into four general categories: personalizing or blaming yourself, magnifying or only focusing on the negative, catastrophizing or expecting the worst to happen, and polarizing or only seeing back and white[7].

    When you stop blaming yourself for everything and start focusing on the positive, expecting things to work out, and seeing the areas of grey in life, you reverse these negative mindsets and engage in positive self-talk.

    When you speak words of kindness to yourself, your brain responds with a more positive attitude. That attitude will affect everything you do. It’s how you take care of yourself if you had a bad day.

    Check in with yourself to know when you are having negative self-talk. Are you seeing patterns? When did they start to become a problem? Are you able to turn these thoughts around?

    6. Use Coping Skills and Take a Break

    Use your coping skills. This means not letting your thoughts take control of yourself.

    You can distract yourself and escape a bit. Do things you love. You can exercise, listen to music, dance, volunteer or help someone, be in nature, or read a book.

    It isn’t about repression. It’s about redirection. You can’t stay in thoughts that are no longer working for you.

    Sometimes, it’s okay to get out of your own way. Give yourself a break from the things going on in your head. You can always come back to a problem later. This may even help you figure out the best course of action as sometimes stepping away is the only way to see the solution.

    If you had a bad day, you may not feel like addressing what went wrong. You may need a break, so take one.

    7. If a Bad Day Turns Into Bad Days

    “I believe depression is legitimate. But I also believe that if you don’t exercise, eat nutritious food, get sunlight, get enough sleep, consume positive material, surround yourself with support, then you aren’t giving yourself a fighting chance.” –Jim Carrey

    If you’ve been feeling out of control, depressed, or unstable for more than a few weeks, it’s time to call a mental health professional. This is not because you have failed in any way. It’s because you are human, and you simply need help.

    You may not be able to quickly rebound from a bad day, and that’s fine. Feel what you feel, but don’t let it consume you.

    When you talk to a professional, share the techniques that you have already tried here and whether they were helpful. They may tell you additional ideas or gain insights from your struggles of not being able to rebound from a series of bad days.

    If you’re having more than just a bad day, they will want to know. If you don’t have the answers, that’s okay, too. You just need to try these tools and figure out how you’re feeling. That’s all that’s required of you.

    Keep taking care of yourself. Any progress is progress, no matter how small. Give yourself a chance to get better by reaching out.

    Final Thoughts

    If you had a bad day, don’t let it stop you.

    Know this: It’s okay not to be okay. You have a right to feel what you feel. But there is something you can do about it.

    You can invest in yourself via self-care.

    You are not alone in this. Everyone has bad days from time to time. You just need to know that you are the positive things you tell yourself.

    More Things You Can Do If You Had a Bad Day

    Featured photo credit: Anthony Tran via unsplash.com

    Reference

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