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5 Lessons The Dalai Lama Taught Me About Happiness

5 Lessons The Dalai Lama Taught Me About Happiness

I was lucky enough to have the opportunity of attending a lecture, titled ‘Happiness: the power of giving & receiving’, handed down by none other than the 14th Dalai Lama himself upon the eve of his 80th birthday.

Now, I’m not much of a spiritual person, or a religious person for that matter. I attended an all-boys catholic high school and was made to sit through hours of religion classes on a weekly basis, but it became quickly apparent that religion, prayer, and meditation weren’t really for me.

I came in with an open mind and I left with nothing but appreciation, respect, and praise for a man who represents so much, has been through so much more, and has such a wonderful and practical message to share with the world in search of inner peace and happiness for all.

In light of that, I thought I would share with you the 5 things that really hit home to me, not because they are profound or paradigm-shifting, but actually because they are so frank and deliberate, and can apply to everyone from every walk of life:

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You are your own master. Ultimately, no one can make you happy if you aren’t able to find it yourself

This was the key to his whole lecture. The only person truly responsible for your own happiness is yourself. Others can try; they can give you the world and expect nothing in return. But if your heart cannot find a way to find contentment and peace within your surroundings, whether engulfed with love and support or starkly alone, nothing else will be able to overcome that.

You are the master of your own happiness, your own sadness, your dreams, and your regrets. The Dalai Lama argued that happiness comes from finding inner peace with yourself and your life, along with service and engagement in your community. But one comes hand in hand with the other.

This one really hit home with me. On my travels, away from my support network of friends and family at home, I’ve had to teach myself new ways of finding happiness and peace when loneliness takes over. And I have found that engaging with the community, giving back to others, and embracing all aspects of the life I lead are major contributors to putting a smile on my face as I wake up every morning.

Seeking happiness through material goods brings only temporary relief, and hides the real problems

Just like the people around us are ultimately powerless to overcome our own feeling of emptiness, the value of papering over our issues with material things is also temporary. In fact, the Dalai Lama stressed that focusing our energy on distracting ourselves from the real issues only prolongs and clouds our path to fulfillment.

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So the next time you drown your sorrows in a bottle of wine, or turn to retail therapy to paper over the loneliness, try mindfully accepting and embracing the hurt, and focus on why it exists, and how you can shift your psyche to make it disappear.

Secular education and a strong sense of compassion for others is the key to happiness

I found this point of his to be extremely refreshing. For the head of a spiritual order to endorse secular education within schools, away from dogmatic religious shackles, and towards the scientific embracing of the mind and soul was extremely impressive.

He rattled off anecdote after anecdote about his time studying with scientists in psychology, neurology, quantum physics, and chemistry, explaining how science is the key to educating people into the future about the world we live in, and through that, building a global foundation of compassion and understanding.

It was truly inspiring. Through better educating ourselves of the world we live in, we build stronger connections with those around us. Through empathy we build compassion, and through compassion, we build happiness. From the poorest streets in Zambia, to the bustling skyscrapers of New York, this is true for everyone.

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The power of praying to a god or deity for happiness or help is questionable at best

This one shocked me a little. It really affirmed to me that the Dalai Lama is a rational, logical, frank, and open-minded person. Instead of preaching from the book, like the rest of the spiritual leaders around the world, he preached from his own mind and experiences.

He told us of his time as a refugee from his own country in March 1959. He recalled a period of great despair where, as leader of six million Tibetans and not much older than I am, he was powerless to protect his people from the might of the Chinese Communists. He was urged to pray to Buddha for help.

So he did. But does he believe that prayer to Buddha, or any deity for that matter, actually does anything? His answer, “I don’t know”, as he chuckled away. Instead, The Dalai Lama said that meditation, education, and deep thought about the issues he faced, were probably the key to finding his way through the toughest times of his life.

Formality impedes true connection with others

I found this one to be the most humorous, but also the most telling of them all. Obviously, the Dalai Lama receives a great deal of respect wherever he goes. He is greeted with a level of pomp and procedure received by few. But he made it very clear at the outset that he thought very little of the formalities prepared for him.

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In fact, he argued through his usual anecdotal style, that formality is a mask that sits in front of who we truly are, and that when we are simply being ourselves, we build stronger connections with those around us. It’s something we see every day, and simply accept as a part of life. But to have a man of such a high office argue against the acts of respect he receives in order open the floor for real dialogue and trust is a very impressive thing.

Breaking down the barriers of formality and hierarchy were a key tenet in his assertion that we really are all equal, including his holiness himself. The Dalai Lama spoke like the most traveled and educated man I had ever met.

His thoughts and beliefs reflected not that of a spiritual leader tied to his holy scriptures, but of a pragmatic and compassionate elder, enlightened by decades of learning from and sharing with people across the globe. Through education and the extension of his arms towards all he has met around the world, he stands as a shining example of the beacon of peace and happiness we can all be.

Featured photo credit: Minette Layne via flickr.com

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Last Updated on December 13, 2018

12 Practical Tips To Stay Fit For Christmas

12 Practical Tips To Stay Fit For Christmas

Christmas is approaching fast, and lots of people not only tend to ruin their usual diets, but they also gain a few extra pounds. Based on studies, the majority of people tend to gain additional weight during the holiday season that starts at the Thanksgiving Day and ends with the New Year celebrations. Excessive eating is claimed to be the main cause for the additional weight gain, but it is also due to lack of physical activity and exercise.

A lot of individuals out there tend to set aside their fitness routines during the holidays since they believe that they do not have enough time to perform their workouts. And because they feel guilty after the holiday season, most of the gyms and fitness centers are packed with fresh members. Always bear in mind that you can still enjoy the holidays and stay fit at the same time. If you want to stay fit during the holiday season, especially during Christmas and the New Year’s Eve, here are some useful tips that might help you:

1. Eat Before Heading Out

First, it is best that you eat something before heading out to visits, trips or family dinners. By doing so, you will no longer be tempted to eat a lot or overindulge yourself since you have already eaten. Skipping on meals is not a good idea either, because you will only be forced to eat more later.

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2. Select The Treats

Make sure to select the treats that you eat in a wise manner. You should choose something that you can only enjoy during the holiday season and not something that is readily available all the time.

3. Avoid Skipping Meals

Don’t skip meals, especially breakfast! Even though it can be tempting to skip on certain meals, believing that it will make up for the treats you consumed in the previous day, don’t do it because it will only lead to counterproductive results.

4. Drink With Moderation

It is best to regulate your drinking since alcohol, coke or other juices will only add more calories to the ones you already eaten!

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5. Be Active

You should still perform your fitness routine whenever possible and if you can’t do that, simply walk more, park your car some distance away from the store or just use the stairs!

6. Get Out Of The House

Make the holidays a family affair and plan outdoor activities where everyone is involved. Even a snowball fight in the backyard will burn a lot of calories and will keep the children entertained.

7. Don’t Skip Your Strength Workouts

Always remember to perform your strength training in order to maintain that muscle mass you worked hard to get. You might be tempted to use lightweights and just do some cardio, but you can burn just as many calories by lifting weights. And with all of those extra stakes you had on the holiday meals, you might even gain some extra muscle. And this is much better than gaining some extra fat.

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8. Set Realistic Goals

You should set realistic exercise objectives. Aim for at least half an hour per day and you will be very happy when you will achieve that. If you plan one hour or more and not achieve it, you will only end up disappointed.

9. Enjoy Yourself

Also make sure to set realistic diet plans! Trying to restrain yourself totally from some foods will only make you eat more. Feel free to enjoy the treats that you really love, but in small portions.

10. Drink A Lot Of Water

This can satiate your appetite as well as keep you hydrated at all times. And it will also prevent a possible hangover if you overdo it with alcohol.

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11. Eat Less And More Often

Distribute your meals evenly throughout the day, and do not eat everything at once.  Instead of having 2 enormous meals, have 5 small ones.  Eat your dinner earlier and have a nice walk before going to bed.

12. Prioritize Your Workouts

Try to do them early in the morning while everyone else is still sleeping. This way you will also avoid remarks like “Oh, come on! It’s Christmas…”

So there you go! Twelve simple tips that will help you avoid gaining weight during the winter holidays, but will also allow you to enjoy yourself and have a great time with your loved ones.

Happy Holidays everyone!

Featured photo credit: rawpixel via unsplash.com

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