Advertising
Advertising

7 Ways to Get What You Want in 2016

7 Ways to Get What You Want in 2016

Are you ready to get what you want in 2016? If so, it’s a good idea to do more than choose a New Year’s resolution. In fact, British psychologist Richard Wiseman discovered in his study that 88% of New Year’s resolutions are broken.

Rather than announcing your resolution at a New Year’s Eve party and then quickly breaking it, here are some ways to actually get what you want in 2016 and make it the best year ever.

Advertising

1. Decide what you truly want

First of all, what is it you truly want? Consider something you desire, and then think about the work required to get it. Do you really want what you say you do, or would you rather not put in the effort to get it? Be honest with yourself. If you really want something, it’s time to work toward getting it. If you’re not sure what you truly want, get this free workbook. It has thought-provoking questions to help you discover your passion and the mark you want to make on the world.

2. Set very specific goals and write them down

Multiple studies have shown that writing down your goals is beneficial. Set your long-term goals very specifically. To learn how to rephrase a vague New Year’s resolution into a specific, measurable goal, read this article for a great example. After you’ve set your long-term goals, break them down into smaller goals, and figure out exactly what you need to do every single day to stay on course to achieve them. Breaking down your long-term goals into small daily goals helps make them less intimidating, and gives you an objective measure of whether or not you’re on track to achieve them.

Advertising

3. Find your why

As you set your goals, find your why. Your why is your purpose. It’s a personal reason you really want to achieve the goal. Having a strong why will help get you through the days you feel unmotivated toward your goal. In his TED Talk “Start With Why,” Simon Sinek describes how finding your why inspires action. What is your very meaningful reason you want to achieve your goal?

4. Make space in your schedule to work on your goals

To achieve your goals and get what you want, you must make space in your life to make your goals a priority. Assess how you’re currently spending your time. Are your days packed with unimportant tasks? Start replacing something unimportant with working toward your goal, even if it’s just a few minutes per day to start. Too many people live their lives in the daily grind, going through the motions, and leave no time in their days for what truly matters to them. Make 2016 the year you make room in your schedule to work on getting what you really want.

Advertising

5. Work on your mindset

If you’re like millions of people, your mindset holds you back from getting what you truly want. Start reframing your negative thoughts of “I could never do that” to “I don’t know how to do that right now, but with the right support system in place, I’ll be able to learn and achieve my goal.” Pay attention to your self-talk. Is it negative? Be kind to yourself and treat yourself as a friend would, with encouragement and positivity. Not sure how to be your own friend? Check out this article50 Small Things You Can Do Every Day to Really Love Yourself. 

6. Conquer your fear

As George Addair said, “Everything you ever wanted is on the other side of fear.” It’s essential to learn to conquer your fear to get what you want. Many fears will likely arise when you’re working toward a big goal. As you get out of your comfort zone and take action toward what you want, here are some of the fears that may be roadblocks for you:

Advertising

  • Fear of standing out
  • Fear of failure
  • Fear of success
  • Fear of the unknown
  • Fear of not being ready
  • Fear of not being smart enough
  • Fear of choosing a path you don’t like

It’s important to not let these fears sabotage your success. When you are overwhelmed with fear, focus on taking tiny baby steps toward your goal. Sometimes, our big goals can seem so huge and far away, and accomplishing them looks pretty impossible. When that happens to you, work on focusing on the small action step for that day only instead of thinking about your massively overwhelming goal. Keep moving forward, one step at a time, and you will make huge amounts of progress toward your goals over the weeks and months.

7. Surround yourself with people doing what you want to do

This is quite possibly my favorite lifehack of all time. The people you surround yourself with make a huge difference in how you live your life. Spend time with people who encourage, inspire, and challenge you to be your best and to achieve your big goals.

It’s time to make 2016 the year you finally get what you want. You’ve got this!

Featured photo credit: Near the top of Ptarmigan Peak. Chugach Mountains, Alaska/Paxson Woelber via flickr.com

More by this author

Dr. Kerry Petsinger

Entrepreneur, Mindset & Performance Coach, & Doctor of Physical Therapy

Feeling Stuck in Life? How to Never Get Stuck Again How to Find the Purpose of Life and Start Living a Fulfilling Life Don’t like your job? Here are some solutions. How People Make Decisions That Are Bad For Them How to Have a Successful Career and a Fulfilling Personal Life

Trending in Featured

1 Why Do I Have Bad Luck? 2 Simple Things to Change Your Destiny 2 The Gentle Art of Saying No 3 How to Motivate Yourself: 13 Simple Ways You Can Try Right Now 4 15 Ways to Cultivate Lifelong Learning for a Sharper Brain 5 How to Overcome Procrastination and Start Doing What Truly Matters

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on November 28, 2018

Why Do I Have Bad Luck? 2 Simple Things to Change Your Destiny

Why Do I Have Bad Luck? 2 Simple Things to Change Your Destiny

Are you one of those people who are always suffering setbacks? Does little ever seem to go right for you? Do you sometimes feel that the universe is out to get you? Do you wonder:

Why do I have bad luck? Is bad luck real?

A couple of months ago, I met up with an old friend of mine who I hadn’t seen since last year. Over lunch, we talked about all kinds of things, including our careers, relationships and hobbies.

My friend told me his job had become dull and uninteresting to him, and despite applying for promotion – he’d been turned down. His personal life wasn’t great either, as he told me that he’d recently separated from his long-term girlfriend.

When I asked him why things had seemingly gone wrong at home and work, he paused for a moment, and then replied:

“I’m having a run of bad luck.”

I was surprised by his response as I’d never thought of him as someone who thought that luck controlled his life. He always appeared to be someone who knew what he wanted – and went after it with gusto.

He told me he did believe in bad luck because of everything happened to me.

Advertising

It was at this point, that I shared my opinion on luck and destiny:

While chance events certainly occur, they are purely random in nature. In other words, good luck and bad luck don’t exist in the way that people believe. And more importantly, even if random negative events do come along, our perspective and reaction can turn them into positive things.

Your luck is no worse—and no better—than anyone else’s. It just feels that way. Better still, there are two simple things you can do which will reverse your feelings of being unlucky and change your luck.

1. Stop believing that what happens in life is out of your control.

Stop believing that what happens in your life is down to the vagaries of luck, destiny, supernatural forces, malevolent other people, or anything else outside yourself.

Psychologists call this “external locus of control.” It’s a kind of fatalism, where people believe that they can do little or nothing personally to change their lives.

Because of this, they either merely hope for the best, focus on trying to change their luck by various kinds of superstition, or submit passively to whatever comes—while complaining that it doesn’t match their hopes.

Most successful people take the opposite view. They have “internal locus of control.” They believe that what happens in their life is nearly all down to them; and that even when chance events occur, what is important is not the event itself, but how you respond to it.

This makes them pro-active, engaged, ready to try new things, and keen to find the means to change whatever in their lives they don’t like.

Advertising

They aren’t fatalistic and they don’t blame bad luck for what isn’t right in their world. They look for a way to make things better.

Are they luckier than the others? Of course not.

Luck is random—that’s what chance means—so they are just as likely to suffer setbacks as anyone else.

What’s different is their response. When things go wrong, they quickly look for ways to put them right. They don’t whine, pity themselves, or complain about “bad luck.” They try to learn from what happened to avoid or correct it next time and get on with living their life as best they can. They have this Motivation Engine, which most people lack, to keep them going.

No one is habitually luckier or unluckier than anyone else. It may seem so, over the short term (Random events often come in groups, just as random numbers often lie close together for several instances—which is why gamblers tend to see patterns where none exist).

When you take a longer perspective, random chance is just . . . random. Yet those who feel that they are less lucky, typically pay far more attention to short-term instances of bad luck, convincing themselves of the correctness of their belief.

Your locus of control isn’t genetic. You learned it somehow. If it isn’t working for you, change it.

2. Remember that whatever you pay attention to grows in your mind.

If you focus on what’s going wrong in your life—especially if you see it as “bad luck” you can do nothing about—it will seem blacker and more malevolent.

Advertising

In a short time, you’ll become so convinced that everything is against you that you’ll notice more and more instances where this appears to be true. As a result, you will drown yourself in negative energy and almost certainly stop trying, convinced that nothing you can do will improve your prospects.

Not long ago, a reader (I’ll call her Kelly) has shared with me about how frustrated she felt and how unlucky she was. Kelly’s an aspiring entrepreneur. She had been trying to find investors to invest in her project. It hadn’t been going well as she was always rejected by the potential investors. And at her most stressful time, her boyfriend broke up with her. And the day after her breakup, she missed an important opportunity to meet an interested investor. She was about to give up because she felt that she’d not be lucky enough to build her business successfully.

It definitely wasn’t an easy time for her. She was stressful and tired. But it wasn’t bad luck that was playing the role.

Fatalism feeds on itself until people become passive “victims” of life’s blows. The “losers” in life are those who are convinced they will fail before they start anything; sure that their “bad luck” will ruin any prospects of success.

They rarely notice that the true reasons for their failure are ignorance, laziness, lack of skill, lack of forethought, or just plain foolishness—all of which they could do something to correct, if only they would stop blaming other people or “bad luck” for their personal deficiencies.

Your attention is under your control. Send it where you want it to go. Starve the negative thoughts until they die.

I explained to Kelly that to improve her fortune and have “good luck”, first decide that what happens is nearly always down to her; then try to focus on what works and what turns out well, not the bad stuff.

Then Kelly tried to review her current situation objectively. She realized that she only needed a short break for herself — from work and her just broken-up relationship. She really needed some time to clear up her mind before moving on with her work and life. When she got her emotions settled down from her heartbreak, she started to work on improving her business’ selling points and looked for new investors that are more suitable.

Advertising

A few months later, she told me that she finally found two investors who were really interested in her project and would like to work with her to grow the business. I was really glad that she could take back control of her destiny and achieved what she wanted.

Your “fate” really does depend on the choices that you make. When random events happen, as they always will, do you choose to try to turn them to your advantage or just complain about them?

What’s Next?

Now that you’ve learned the 2 simple things you can do to take control of your fate and create your own luck. But this isn’t it! These simple techniques you’ve learned here are just part of the essential 7 Cornerstone Skills — a skillset that will give you the power to create permanent solutions to big problems in life — any problem in any area of your life!

If you think you’re “suffering from bad luck”, you can really change things up and start life over with these 7 Cornerstone Skills. It may even be a lot easier than you thought:

How to Start Over and Reboot Your Life When It Seems Too Late

Thomas Jefferson is said to have used these words:

“I’m a great believer in luck and I find the harder I work, the more I have of it.”

Your luck, in the end, is pretty much what you choose it to be.

More Ideas About Creating Your Own Luck

Books About Taking Control of Your Life

Featured photo credit: LoboStudio Hamburg via unsplash.com

Read Next