Advertising
Advertising

8 Old-fashioned Dating Ideas To Strengthen Your Relationship

8 Old-fashioned Dating Ideas To Strengthen Your Relationship

Do you ever feel like you are dating in the wrong era?

Technology now gives us new ways of dating and expressing love, from swiping right on Tinder to sharing a few emoji-filled texts with your crush.

Advertising

For some people though, modern dating cannot be compared to old-fashioned dating. Old-fashioned dating seems more romantic and sweet without mobile phones and laptops.

A small amount of effort goes a long way to improve a date – check out 8 old-fashioned dating ideas that should be revived.

Advertising

1. Not using your mobile on a date

Technology rules our lives – and our relationships. Many people feel like their partners spend too much time checking their texts, Facebook, Snapchat and Instagram when they are together, and nothing ruins a date faster than feeling ignored. Putting the phones away gives you a chance to actually have an awesome, meaningful face-to-face conversation.

2. Picking your partner up before going on a date

None of this meeting at the location – let’s face it, no-one enjoys a lonely bus or car ride alone to their date. You may feel nervous, with butterflies in your stomach, and you may even worry about being stood up. With old-fashioned dating it was customary for the man to pick up his date – and even walk up to her door! This means you get to travel to the date together, and by the time you get there the nerves will be gone and you will both be having fun.

Advertising

3. Taking your partner home after a date

Many people today either go home together, or they go home separately. But the date isn’t just a line-up to sex; you could have met someone wonderful who you would love to hang out with again. With old-fashioned dating, it was customary for the man to make sure the woman got home safely. Although women don’t need a man to make sure they are safe, the gesture was very sweet and it gave the couple a chance to talk some more – and maybe even have a romantic kiss in the doorway.

4. Not following the ‘rules’ of dating

Modern dating is filled with strange rules about when you should call someone after a date, and even when you should sleep with them. With old-fashioned dating, if you liked someone you would simply let them know how much you like them. Why waste time when you’ve met someone you really like? Upfront and honest is always the best method when it comes to love and dating.

Advertising

5. Buying each other flowers

There is nothing better than a romantic gesture to show your date that you’ve been thinking about them. Flowers are a classic gift from old-fashioned dating, and they are the perfect way to show someone you like them without spending a crazy amount of money. They also smell wonderful and look beautiful!

6. Dancing together

Most modern dating destinations mean you have the option to dance, but very few couples do, which is a huge shame. Dancing was an important part old-fashioned dating and it is so much fun. Don’t worry about not having the best moves – dancing with a date is all about making each other laugh while getting intimate!

7. Taking it slow

Most people know a couple who said “I love you” after two weeks of dating – what is that?! Many people seem to confuse love and lust with each other, resulting in difficult break-ups after expecting too much from each other. Love was slower with old-fashioned dating, so when you fell in love you knew the feeling was real.

8. Introducing your date to people

Many people nowadays don’t want to talk about who they are dating until it is ‘serious’. They can go on many different dates without their family or friends knowing who the date is. With old-fashioned dating, people were proud of their date, and they happily spoke about them to their loved ones. Let’s face it; it is a little rude if you don’t, and it can leave your date feeling awkward.

More by this author

Amy Johnson

Amy is a writer who blogs about relationships and lifestyle advice.

If You Feel Trapped, Do These 9 Things To Take Your Life Back If You Feel Trapped, Do These 9 Things To Take Your Life Back This List of 50 Low-cost Hobbies Will Excite You Daily Routine of Successful People That Will Inspire You to Achieve More 15 Inspirational Weekend Activities to do by Yourself 15 Amazing Design Ideas For Your Small Living Room

Trending in Communication

1 The Secret to Effective Conflict Resolution: The IBR Approach 2 How to Master Effective Communication Skills at Work and Home 3 Building Relationships: 11 Rules for Self-Promotion 4 18 Ways to Have Effective Communication in the Workplace 5 How to Make Changes in Life To Be The Very Best Version of You

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on February 21, 2019

The Secret to Effective Conflict Resolution: The IBR Approach

The Secret to Effective Conflict Resolution: The IBR Approach

In business, in social relationships, in family… In whatever context conflict is always inevitable, especially when you are in the leader role. This role equals “make decisions for the best of majority” and the remaining are not amused. Conflicts arise.

Conflicts arise when we want to push for a better quality work but some members want to take a break from work.

Conflicts arise when we as citizens want more recreational facilities but the Government has to balance the needs to maintain tourism growth.

Conflicts are literally everywhere.

Avoiding Conflicts a No-No and Resolving Conflicts a Win-Win

Avoiding conflicts seem to be a viable option for us. The cruel fact is, it isn’t. Conflicts won’t walk away by themselves. They will, instead, escalate and haunt you back even more when we finally realize that’s no way we can let it be.

Moreover, avoiding conflicts will eventually intensify the misunderstanding among the involved parties. And the misunderstanding severely hinders open communication which later on the parties tend to keep things secret. This is obviously detrimental to teamwork.

Advertising

Some may view conflicts as the last step before arguments. And they thus leave it aside as if they never happen. This is not true.

Conflicts are the intersect point between different individuals with different opinions. And this does not necessarily lead to argument.

Instead, proper handling of conflicts can actually result in a win-win situation – both parties are pleased and allies are gained. A better understanding between each other and future conflicts are less likely to happen.

The IBR Approach to Resolve Conflicts

Here, we introduce to you an effective approach to resolve conflicts – the Interest-Based Relational (IBR) approach. The IBR approach was developed by Roger Fisher and William Ury in their 1981 book Getting to Yes. It stresses the importance of the separation between people and their emotions from the problem. Another focus of the approach is to build mutual understanding and respect as they strengthen bonds among parties and can ultimately help resolve conflicts in a harmonious way. The approach suggests a 6-step procedure for conflict resolution:

Step 1: Prioritize Good Relationships

How? Before addressing the problem or even starting the discussion, make it clear the conflict can result in a mutual trouble and through subsequent respectful negotiation the conflict can be resolved peacefully. And that brings the best outcome to the whole team by working together.

Why? It is easy to overlook own cause of the conflict and point the finger to the members with different opinions. With such a mindset, it is likely to blame rather than to listen to the others and fail to acknowledge the problem completely. Such a discussion manner will undermine the good relationships among the members and aggravate the problem.

Advertising

Example: Before discussion, stress that the problem is never one’s complete fault. Everyone is responsible for it. Then, it is important to point out our own involvement in the problem and state clearly we are here to listen to everyone’s opinions rather than accusing others.

Step 2: People Are NOT the Cause of Problem

How? State clearly the problem is never one-sided. Collaborative effort is needed. More importantly, note the problem should not be taken personally. We are not making accusations on persons but addressing the problem itself.

Why? Once things taken personally, everything will go out of control. People will become irrational and neglect others’ opinions. We are then unable to address the problem properly because we cannot grasp a fuller and clearer picture of the problem due to presumption.

Example: In spite of the confronting opinions, we have to emphasize that the problem is not a result of the persons but probably the different perspectives to view it. So, if we try to look at the problem from the other’s perspective, we may understand why there are varied opinions.

Step 3: Listen From ALL Stances

How? Do NOT blame others. It is of utmost importance. Ask for everyone’s opinions. It is important to let everyone feel that they contribute to the discussion. Tell them their involvement is essential to solve the problem and their effort is very much appreciated.

Why? None wants to be ignored. If one feels neglected, it is very likely for he/she to be aggressive. It is definitely not what we hope to see in a discussion. Acknowledging and being acknowledged are equally important. So, make sure everyone has equal opportunity to express their views. Also, realizing their opinions are not neglected, they will be more receptive to other opinions.

Advertising

Example: A little trick can played here: Invite others to talk first. It is an easy way to let others feel involved and ,more importantly, know their voices are heard. Also, we can show that we are actively listening to them by giving direct eye-contact and nodding. One important to note is that never interrupt anyone. Always let them finish first beforeanother one begins.

Step 4: Listen Comes First, Talk Follows

How? Ensure everyone has listened to one another points of view. It can be done by taking turn to speak and leaving the discussion part at last. State once again the problem is nothing personal and no accusation should be made.

Why? By turn-taking, everyone can finish talking and voices of all sides can be heard indiscriminantly. This can promote willingness to listen to opposing opinions.

Example: We can prepare pieces of paper with different numbers written on them. Then, ask different members to pick one and talk according to the sequence of the number. After everyone’s finished, advise everyone to use “I” more than “You” in the discussion period to avoid others thinking that it is an accusation.

Step 5: Understand the Facts, Then Address the Problem

How? List out ALL the facts first. Ask everyone to tell what they know about the problems.

Why? Sometimes your facts are unknown to the others while they may know something we don’t. Missing out on these facts could possibly lead to inaccurate capture of the problem. Also, different known facts can lead to different perception of the matter. It also helps everyone better understand the problem and can eventually help reach a solution.

Advertising

Example: While everyone is expressing their own views, ask them to write down everything they know that is true to the problem. As soon as everyone has finished, all facts can be noted and everyone’s understanding of the problem is raised.

Step 6: Solve the Problem Together

How? Knowing what everyone’s thinking, it is now time to resolve the conflict. Up to this point, everyone should have understood the problem better. So, it is everyone’s time to suggest some solutions. It is important not to have one giving all the solutions.

Why? Having everyone suggesting their solutions is important as they will not feel excluded and their opinions are considered. Besides, it may also generate more solutions that can better resolve the conflicts. Everyone will more likely be satisfied with the result.

Example: After discussion, ask all members to suggest any possible solutions and stress that all solutions are welcomed. State clearly that we are looking for the best outcomes for everyone’s sake rather than battling to win over one another. Then, evaluate all the solutions and pick the one that is in favor of everyone.

Read Next