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Delicious And Nutritious Pregnancy Diet Plan

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Delicious And Nutritious Pregnancy Diet Plan

Let’s start with what you can’t eat for your pregnancy diet plan. If before you got pregnant you couldn’t eat like a glutton you still can’t. But now the list of things you can’t eat has grown considerably. You can’t eat deli meat or some types of fish (that would contain mercury). Of course at some point, usually in the early stages, you won’t be able to keep any food down. Morning sickness is common for most pregnancies, and will eventually subside.

Iron rich diet

pregnancy diet plan

    Any red meat will work, and you can take prenatal vitamins but the best source of iron is cooked animal flesh. Certain vegetables are good as well and chicken is a great source of iron if you prefer something with less fat. Steak is a perfect carnivorous treat for your growing baby. Make sure to order a side of broccoli because that too is iron rich.

    Crab Salad Sandwhich

    Got crabs? You should get crabs, I’m telling you they are the best. Seafood is full Omega-3 and this recipe for crab sandwiches is the best lunchtime snack for you and your baby. Catfish is not allowed.

    NUTRIENT TOTALS

    Calories: 564.4
    Protein: 33.2 g
    Carbohydrate: 69.6 g
    Dietary Fiber: 11.9 g
    Total Sugars: 9.441 g
    Total Fat: 20.8 g
    Saturated Fat: 2.286 g
    Cholesterol: 110.5 mg
    Total Omega-3 FA: 1.186 g
    Calcium: 183.2 mg
    Iron: 6.462 mg
    Sodium: 1103 mg
    Vitamin D: 0 mcg
    Folate: 87.6 mcg
    Folic Acid: 0 mcg

    Parmesan Chicken Tenders with Marinara dipping Sauce

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      Who says you can’t go out and still eat healthy? These nutrition facts are a great guide for eating right at any restaurant, where you’re sure to find chicken of a similar fashion.

      NUTRIENT TOTALS

      Calories: 649.2
      Protein: 50.9 g
      Carbohydrate: 69.6 g
      Dietary Fiber: 10.7 g
      Total Sugars: 19.7 g
      Total Fat: 22.8 g
      Saturated Fat: 4.002 g
      Cholesterol: 92.5 mg
      Total Omega-3 FA: .222 g
      Calcium: 231.4 mg
      Iron: 3.678 mg
      Sodium: 1171 mg
      Vitamin C: 68.1 mg
      Folate: 86.5 mcg
      Folic Acid: 11.1 mcg
      Food Folate: 75.4 mcg

      Pork and Pineapple Kebabs

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        Dads are sure to love this one, men have always prided themselves as being the steward of the grill, whether it’s steak or these healthy kebobs you can bet your man will grill them to a perfection that will satisfy your pregnancy cravings and then some.

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        NUTRIENT TOTALS

        Calories: 640.6
        Protein: 35.6 g
        Carbohydrate: 86.8 g
        Dietary Fiber: 15.2 g
        Total Sugars: 28.6 g
        Total Fat: 19.2 g
        Saturated Fat: 3.429 g
        Cholesterol: 71.4 mg
        Total Omega-3 FA: .187 g
        Calcium: 75.1 mg
        Iron: 4.212 mg
        Sodium: 366.8 mg
        Vitamin C: 103.2 mg
        Folate: 101.5 mcg
        Folic Acid: 0 mcg
        Food Folate: 101.5 mcg

        Nachos

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          Being pregnant doesn’t mean you can’t have a party! Nachos are the best party treat that you can provide, and if you already have a little one they will love them as well.

          NUTRIENT TOTALS

          Calories: 656.8
          Protein: 36.9 g
          Carbohydrate: 70.4 g
          Dietary Fiber: 11.9 g
          Total Sugars: 9.806 g
          Total Fat: 29 g
          Saturated Fat: 7.082 g
          Cholesterol: 30 mg
          Total Omega-3 FA: .44 g
          Calcium: 712.1 mg
          Iron: 4.461 mg
          Sodium: 1517 mg
          Vitamin C: 9.557 mg
          Folate: 140.6 mcg
          Folic Acid: 0 mcg
          Food Folate: 140.6 mcg

          Soup and Bread

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            The comfort of a warm soup will melt away the stress that carrying a baby will bring. Add some bread and your taste bud and baby will thank you. They might give you a little kick after but don’t worry that just means they like it. This recipe for one of my favorite comfort foods is healthy and delicious.

            NUTRIENT TOTALS

            Calories: 200.7
            Protein: 7.689 g
            Carbohydrate: 33.7 g
            Dietary Fiber: 3.416 g
            Total Sugars: 2.67 g
            Total Fat: 4.44 g
            Saturated Fat: 1.277 g
            Cholesterol: 3.283 mg
            Total Omega-3 FA: .892 g
            Calcium: 126.4 mg
            Iron: 2.498 mg
            Sodium: 625.9 mg
            Vitamin C: .723 mg
            Folate: 76.5 mcg
            Folic Acid: 4.82 mcg
            Food Folate: 71.6 mcg

            Vegetarian alternative

            pregnancy diet plan
              A dish of delicious hummus

              Chickpeas, lentils, and tofu are natural sources of iron that won’t offend your ethics. If you don’t eat meat there are more ways than one to make substitutions for a carnivorous craving of meat. This means that your pregnancy diet plan doesn’t need to include meat, so you can stay healthy if you don’t eat it. The Vegetarian Society recommends vitamin C; a small dose of this will help your body absorb iron better.

              Hummus

              Here’s a great homemade recipe for hummus,

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              NUTRIENT TOTALS

              Calories: 210
              Protein: 6 g
              Carbohydrate: 32 g
              Fiber: 3 g
              Fat: 7 g
              Saturated fat: 1 g
              Sugars: 2 g
              Calcium: 24 mg
              Sodium: 597 mg

               Frozen Yogurt Pops

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                Frozen yogurt pops anyone? It’s as easy as buying some yogurt and adding a stick. Just make sure to get a cute tray for your frozen treat and store it in your freezer. Great for any hot summer day, especially if you’re pregnant and wanting to cool off, it’s also full of nutrients, and more so than a flavored ice pop.

                NUTRIENT TOTALS

                Calories: 100
                Protein: 6 g
                Carbohydrate: 18 g
                Fiber: 0 g
                Fat: 0 g
                Saturated fat: 0 g
                Sugars: 16 g
                Sodium: 130 mg

                Creamy Strawberry Mousse

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                  This treat needs no introduction, I’m practically salivating myself and don’t have the extra amount of hunger of a pregnant woman. If you’re planning on making this treat it does make enough for two. Sharing is caring they say, who better to share it with than your baby’s father?

                  NUTRIENT TOTALS (with non-fat yogurt)

                  Calories: 132
                  Protein: 8 g
                  Carbohydrate: 25 g
                  Fiber: 2 g
                  Fat: 0 g
                  Saturated fat: 0 g
                  Sugar: 20 g
                  Calcium: 105 mg
                  Sodium: 29 mg

                  Prep: 20 mins
                  Total Time: 30 mins 

                  Fiesta Salad

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                    Salads are low calorie meals that won’t send your gastrointestinal system into a bind. They also have, with the right ingredients the variety of nutrition that you and your growing baby need.

                    NUTRIENT TOTALS

                    Calories: 542.7
                    Protein: 27.4 g
                    Carbohydrate: 66.9 g
                    Dietary Fiber: 20.7 g
                    Total Sugars: 7.892 g
                    Total Fat: 21.4 g
                    Saturated Fat: 5.26 g
                    Cholesterol: 20 mg
                    Total Omega-3 FA: .401 g
                    Calcium: 360 mg
                    Iron: 5.411 mg
                    Sodium: 394.3 mg
                    Vitamin D: 0 mcg
                    Folate: 415.8 mcg
                    Folic Acid: 0 mcg

                    Loaded Pesto Veggie Burger

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                      Portabella mushrooms are the steak of vegetarians, and if you’ve never eaten a veggie burger you are missing out on a delicious and rather nutritious meal. Meat eaters and vegetarians alike will enjoy this recipe.

                      NUTRIENT TOTALS

                      Calories: 549.1
                      Protein: 33.2 g
                      Carbohydrate: 55.4 g
                      Dietary Fiber: 11.8 g
                      Total Sugars: 13.3 g
                      Total Fat: 22.2 g
                      Saturated Fat: 7.257 g
                      Cholesterol: 30.1 mg
                      Total Omega-3 FA: .356 g
                      Calcium: 413.5 mg
                      Iron: 3.905 mg
                      Sodium: 867.8 mg
                      Vitamin D: .312 mcg
                      Folate: 125.3 mcg
                      Folic Acid: 0 mcg

                      Stuffed Acorn Squash

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                        Stuffed acorn squash has tons of nutrients that all pregnant women need. Cut 1 medium acorn squash in half and remove those pesky seeds. Place it on a baking sheet or pan and slide it in the oven. Bake at 375 degrees for 45 minutes. You can throw whatever you like on it but here’s a great recipe.

                        NUTRIENT TOTALS

                        Calories: 641.7
                        Protein: 23.6 g
                        Carbohydrate: 110.2 g
                        Dietary Fiber: 16.2 g
                        Total Sugars: 6.101 g
                        Total Fat: 16.5 g
                        Saturated Fat: 3.59 g
                        Cholesterol: 6.8 mg
                        Total Omega-3 FA: .438 g
                        Calcium: 362.5 mg
                        Iron: 7.457 mg
                        Sodium: 763.8 mg
                        Vitamin C: 55.4 mg
                        Folate: 198.2 mcg
                        Folic Acid: 0 mcg
                        Food Folate: 198.2 mcg

                        Natural sources of DHA

                        DHA is found in most pregnancy supplemental pills, and can be found naturally in fish. Some fish however, are not okay to eat. Levels of mercury will hurt your baby so any fish that would be exposed to it is not healthy to eat. Your baby shares your blood and mercury never gets filtered out of your blood by any of your organs. It stays there, and adding any additional mercury to your blood is unwise during your pregnancy. With that said, DHA is great for your diet and halibut or mackerel is safe for you to eat.

                        Energy drinks

                        Careful — not too much! One of them would be okay, and many have things like niacin and B12 in them. You’re safe to have caffeine in small amounts, but some energy drinks would exceed the recommended amount for a pregnant woman. You can find natural sources for any of the supplements found in prenatal multi-vitamins.

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                        pregnancy diet plan

                          Folic acid

                          Any of the vegetarian examples I gave for sources of iron can also be great sources for folic acid. Other natural sources include beets, and the before mentioned broccoli. One cup of beets is about 35% of your recommended daily intake of folic acid. They also happen to be a good source of antioxidants. Your pregnancy diet plan is not complete without a varied diet of vegetables.

                          Egg Wrap: Full of Folates

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                            Wraps are quick and simple to make. Just scramble some eggs and throw in some vegetables and seasoning, and wrap it up!

                            NUTRIENT TOTALS

                            Calories: 453.4
                            Protein: 26.2 g
                            Carbohydrate: 44 g
                            Dietary Fiber: 6.86 g
                            Total Sugars: .941 g
                            Total Fat: 21.2 g
                            Saturated Fat: 5.989 g
                            Cholesterol: 231.5 mg
                            Total Omega-3 FA: .164 g
                            Calcium: 353.8 mg
                            Iron: 4.448 mg
                            Sodium: 856.6 mg
                            Vitamin D: .438 mcg
                            Folate: 123.6 mcg
                            Folic Acid: 16.8 mcg

                            You’re hungry right?

                            Things that are high in fat might be the perfect junk food, or a nice way to ease your anxiety, but too much of things like lipids and glucose will harm your baby. It’s, obviously, not as bad as doing drugs, but your diet is important for your baby’s development in the womb. I really don’t think I should have to say that your diet should not include alcohol.

                            You will need to eat more than you have been eating, but not too much. Most people don’t eat the right things; many of us eat at fast food restaurants or other places that serve food that isn’t healthy. The recipes here will help you fulfill the specific diet needs that your baby will require. All that is missing is someone to come to your house and cook it for you.

                            The Pregnancy Diet Plan Regimen

                            You may have a busy schedule, and need a tightly regimented pregnancy diet plan that’s convenient for you. Here are some easy meal ideas for breakfast, lunch, dinner, or a snack:

                            Breakfast

                            Breakfast is the most important meal of the day, or if you just enjoy the taste of the sort of meals people usually eat at breakfast have them at midnight.

                            1. Spinach Smoothie – Mix 1/2 cup of plain, non-fat greek yogurt, a handful of spinach, 1 cup of frozen fruit (the fruit covers the flavor of the spinach), 2 tablespoons of chia seed, and a little water in a blender. This one is fast and easy, covers every essential nutrient, and is ideal for mamas with morning sickness because it’s easy on the tummy.
                            2. PB&J Oatmeal – Make 1/2 cup of organic old fashioned rolled oats as directed with 1/2 cup of frozen blueberries. Add 1 tablespoon of peanut butter (peanuts only, no sugar, salt, or oils added) and mix.
                            3. Egg Muffins – Add chopped veggies and lean meat of your choice to a non-stick muffin pan, pour whisked egg over the top, bake at 350 until browned, about 20 minutes. You can prepare a large batch of these and refrigerate, then reheat and eat each morning.
                            4. Sweet Potato Hash – cook scrambled eggs, turkey sausage or leftover lean meat, chopped veggies of your choice (I like spinach and onion), and diced sweet potato together in a skillet.
                            5. Breakfast Tacos – scramble eggs, add lean meat like turkey sausage, sprinkle a little organic shredded cheese on top and serve in a warm corn tortilla (make sure the only ingredient in your tortilla is corn, available at Whole Foods). I eat this with a side of sliced bell peppers. Make a big batch of these, freeze and reheat.
                            6. Cookie Dough Cereal – 1/2 cup organic old fashioned rolled oats, 2T nut butter, 1t organic raw honey, and a sprinkle of unsweetened cocoa powder mixed together until crumbly. Add 1/2 cup milk and enjoy.
                            7. Blueberry Waffles or Pancakesrecipe here
                            8. Veggie Omelet – make an omelet with any chopped veggies you like, I prefer spinach, tomatoes, onion, with a sprinkle of pasteurized goat cheese, or go with broccoli, sun dried tomatoes, bell peppers, kale, asparagus – the possibilities are endless. Add fresh herbs like basil, oregano and chives for more flavor.
                            9. Southwestern Scramble – 2 eggs, hatch chiles, onion, shredded chicken, and avocado scrambled together
                            10. Greek Yogurt and Berries – use organic, plain greek yogurt, mix in fresh berries, cinnamon, and vanilla. For some crunch add sliced almonds. Quick and easy.

                            Lunch

                            silasfount568

                              Lunch is one my favorite meals, in fact instead of the “second breakfast” that hobbits tend to enjoy, I prefer second lunch.

                              1. Whole Wheat Pita Sandwich – stuff it with greens like baby spinach, chopped veggies, and lean meat. Add a little pasteurized goat cheese or spicy mustard.
                              2. Super Food Salad – start with a leafy green like spinach or kale, add a chopped veggie of every color (red/yellow/orange bell peppers, tomatoes, onion, cucumber, celery, carrots, etc.), add high omega-3 nuts or seeds for crunch (walnuts, pumpkin seeds) and a super fruit like pomegranate seeds or berries. Dress with a little extra virgin olive oil and vinegar, like balsamic or apple cider. Top with grilled chicken, hardboiled eggs, smoked turkey breast, or another lean meat. Prep all your veggies and meat on the day you buy them, so all you have to do is assemble the salad at mealtime.
                              3. Healthy Chicken Salad – instead of mayo, use a combination of avocado and plain, non-fat organic greek yogurt to make a chicken salad (I like to add celery, green and red onions, cilantro, lime juice). Serve on a bed of leafy greens, lettuce cups, or use a collard green leaf as a wrap.
                              4. Quinoa Salad – Prepare quinoa (you can do this ahead of time and store in the fridge), season with your favorite spices and fresh herbs, add chopped veggies (asparagus, cherry tomatoes, bell peppers, or artichokes for example), lean meat, and avocado for a healthy fat, mix together. You could also add garbanzo beans for extra protein and fiber, or sub for the lean meat. Here’s a recipe.
                              5. Chili or Soup – Make a large batch of turkey chili or vegetable soup, store in the fridge to reheat and eat. Here’s my favorite Turkey Chili recipe and my favorite stew recipe.
                              6. Burrito Bowl – Heat up cooked brown rice (or you can make a batch of cauliflower riceto to get in an extra veggie), add roasted red peppers, black beans, lean meat (I like shrimp), and mix with a little salsa or fire roasted tomatoes. Top with avocado and a splash of lime juice.
                              7. Turkey Burger – mix together ground turkey breast with hatch chiles and seasoning, form into a patty and grill. Serve in a collard green wrap or on a bed of spinach. Top with tomato, onion, and sliced avocado. If you’re craving fries with your burger, cut up a sweet potato into fries, coat with a teaspoon of grapeseed oil, season and bake until crispy. You can also make these ahead of time, freeze and reheat.
                              8. Veggie Pizza – Layer wilted spinach, fresh basil, minced garlic, carmelized onions, thin-sliced roma tomatoes or sun-dried tomatoes, fire roasted red peppers, and cubed chicken on a piece of whole wheat naan. Optional – sprinkle with skim mozzarella or parmesan. Bake in the oven for 10 minutes.
                              9. Beef and Broccoli – Take leftover or prepared beef (I like flank steak, grass-fed if you can find it), toss with baked spaghetti squash (or wilted bean sprouts), steamed broccoli, sesame seeds, sesame oil, white wine vinegar, fish sauce, chopped green onion and chopped peanuts. You could also add shredded carrots.
                              10. Taco Salad – make your own taco shells by rubbing whole wheat tortillas with a little olive oil and sea salt, press into an oven safe bowl, and bake at 400 degrees (tortilla side up) for 10 minutes or until crispy. Add shredded greens like romaine, chopped veggies of your choice and/or pico de gallo, sliced avocado, mexican-seasoned cooked ground beef (grass-fed and lean), and a sprinkle of colby-jack cheese if desired. Top with a dollop of plain greek yogurt mixed with fresh salsa.

                              Dinner

                              1. Baked Salmon and Veggies – an easy meal, place a wild-caught salmon filet in a foil packet, top with sliced tomatoes and onions, and drizzle with extra virgin olive oil. Bake in the oven or grill until fish is tender and flaky, and serve with a side of roasted broccoli and garlic
                              2. Grilled Chicken Tenders – marinate chicken tenderloin all day in the fridge with Worcestershire, olive oil, lemon juice, sea salt/pepper and minced garlic. Grill and serve with a side of baked sweet potato fries (see above) and cucumber salad (sliced cucumber, diced red onion, apple cider vinegar, plain greek yogurt)
                              3. Spinach, Strawberry, and Chicken Salad – Baby spinach, sliced strawberries, sliced almonds, diced cucumber, grilled chicken tossed with homemade vinaigrette dressing (olive oil, touch of raw organic honey, lemon juice, white wine vinegar whisked together)
                              4. Spaghetti and Spinach Meatballs – prepare whole wheat spaghetti or spaghetti squash, toss with tomatoes, garlic, olive oil, pepper flakes, basil, and a pinch of salt. Make meatballs with ground turkey breast or grass-fed lean ground beef by mixing with chopped spinach, kale, or broccoli, minced garlic, onion, and egg, and baking in the oven. Serve with a small side salad.
                              5. Stuffed Butternut or Acorn Squash – Stuff a roasted squash with cooked lean meat of your choice (seasoned lean grass-fed beef or ground turkey is my fave), black beans, chopped veggies, spinach. Bake in the oven until hot, sprinkle with cheese.
                              6. Zucchini Boats – We love this recipe
                              7. Salmon and Veggie Kabobs – Marinate Salmon, zucchini and/or summer squash, onion and bell peppers in the fridge (I use a marinade of hummus mixed with olive oil) for a few hours. Layer fish and veggies on skewer and grill until salmon is firm but flaky. Great with a giant slice of watermelon in the summertime!
                              8. Greek Chicken Salad – chopped romaine, grilled chicken (marinated in lemon juice and olive oil), grape tomatoes, chopped cucumber, a sprinkle of crumbled (pasteurized) feta, olives, red onion, and homemade dressing with olive oil, lemon juice, salt, pepper, and garlic.
                              9. Thai Meatballs, Broccoli and Noodles – Make a peanut thai sauce by whisking coconut milk (canned), peanut butter, curry paste, a touch of honey, soy sauce, fish sauce, and sesame oil. Make meatballs by combining lean grass-fed beef with soy sauce, egg, chopped spinach, and chopped green onion, bake or brown in skillet. Add broccoli and serve over baked spaghetti squash or wilted bean sprouts, add sauce and toss. Garnish with chopped peanuts and green onion.
                              10. Roasted Shrimp and Veggies – Toss peeled and de-veined shrimp with cauliflower, broccoli, onion, minced garlic, chopped tomatoes and a little olive oil, lemon juice, sea salt and pepper. Roast until shrimp is pink and veggies are tender.

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                                Snacks

                                Snacks are going to be a big part of your pregnancy. No one has the time or energy to cook full meals constantly. So be prepared to snack often and not regret one bit of it.

                                1. Apple slices and almond butter
                                2. Steamed edamame (make sure any soy product you buy is organic, non-GMO)
                                3. Baked Sweet Potato with cinnamon
                                4. Toasted pumpkin seeds and sea salt
                                5. Raw veggies (bell peppers, carrots, celery, cucumber) dipped in hummus or greek yogurt
                                6. Baked Kale “chips” – toss kale leaves with a touch of olive oil and sea salt, bake at 350 for 10 minutes or until crispy
                                7. Texas Caviar – pinto beans, lime juice, cilantro, and pico de gallo
                                8. Frozen Blueberries or Grapes
                                9. Celery Sticks and Almond Butter
                                10. Endive Spears stuffed with chopped pear, (pasteurized) goat cheese, and a drizzle of balsamic vinegar
                                11. Greek yogurt with Strawberry slices, vanilla and cinnamon
                                12. Watermelon Popsicle – puree watermelon, greek yogurt or coconut milk, raw organic honey, pour into popsicle molds and freeze
                                13. Sugar Snap Peas dipped in warm goat cheese
                                14. Crab Stuffed Avocado – slice an avocado in half and stuff with a mixture of seasoned wild-caught crab meat, cucumber, carrot, and a little plain greek yogurt. Tastes like a california roll
                                15. Banana “Ice Cream” – Puree Bananas and walnuts with a splash of coconut milk (or your choice of milk) in a food processor. Put in freezer until it has consistency of ice cream.
                                16. Cherry Tomatoes (sliced) topped with pasteurized goat cheese
                                17. A handful of roasted almonds sprinkled with sea salt with 2 squares of dark chocolate
                                18. Whole wheat bagel, scooped out, with ricotta cheese and berries
                                19. Clementine sprinkled with cinnamon
                                20. Cucumber Salad – mix cucumber slices, greek yogurt, apple cider vinegar, chopped red onion, dill, and a sprinkle of turbinado sugar

                                Featured photo credit: Photo credit: JefferyW Title: Rib eye steak and fries via flickr.com

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                                Published on September 24, 2021

                                How to Teach Children About Respect When They’re Small

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                                How to Teach Children About Respect When They’re Small

                                When we enter into the journey of being a parent, we go through a rollercoaster of thoughts, looking a little ahead and worrying about keeping our kids safe. There’s that loop about wanting to be able to provide for them, giving our kids the things we wanted but could not have. But there’s also this nagging worry at the back of our minds about what will happen when our kids become teenagers. Do you remember Kevin and Perry and the moment Kevin turned 13 years old? Kevin went on the spot from this great kid to a monster that talked down to his parents all of the time.

                                Think back to what you were like as a teenager. Was there a power struggle with your parents or was there mutual respect? The idea of having our kids respect us is usually at the back of our minds while our kids are young. It’s not usually a problem. Outside the occasional tantrums, there are just rainbows and unicorns. Learning about respect is probably less important than learning to tie shoelaces, right? Hell, no!

                                The reality is that respect is one of the most important values that a young child can learn. It can help build good friendships with other children in the neighborhood and at school. Learning to be a little more tolerant of differences makes them more understanding when people do not act or behave as your kids expect them to. Respect helps children to focus more in class. Most importantly of all, it can build a stronger relationship with the immediate family.

                                These are all qualities we want for our kids, and they are also the qualities of a leader. Teaching respect to our kids sounds great. But first, what is it and how do we teach children about respect?

                                What Is Respect?

                                Respect is a way of recognizing and appreciating the rights, beliefs, practices, and differences of other people. It’s a little more than just being tolerant of other people. It’s a feeling that comes from within about how you should treat other people. It’s about how you should think about yourself, too. More recently, respect has also become more visible with the idea of respecting other people’s personal space due to the pandemic.

                                When our kids apply respect, they’ll make better decisions and avoid things or people that will hurt them. They are more likely to take care of the gifts that you’ve bought for them. Most importantly, they are more likely to earn respect from their parents as they become teenagers, rather than demanding it.

                                How Do We Teach Children About Respect?

                                My personal opinion is that you should not outsource teaching respect to other people. As parents, we have to own this responsibility. Even from a young age, there are a lot of poor influences on our kid’s attitude towards respect, such as terrible role models in the movies like Frozen. In this movie, Elsa takes no responsibility for managing her powers, hurts her sister and kingdom, and avoids demonstrating any respect throughout the story. So, where to start with teaching children about respect?

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                                1. Teach Your Children About Sharing

                                My earliest memory where I learned respect was at the age of four. I had an incredible red trike. It was epic, has a custom design, has faster wheels, and a decent steering lock. Then, one day, my dad took the trike and handed it over to my nursery. Other children were using it! This was a culture shock as it was one of my favorite things, but now I had to share it. It took a little time, but I was okay with the sharing as my dad rewarded me with cake for sharing.

                                Sharing is one of the best ways to teach kids about respect. Our kids learn that if we give a little to others, we can sometimes get some of what we want as well. Kids will watch what the parents do. At the dinner table, do they pass things around like the ketchup or share items of food? Or does everyone have their phones out, sit in a silo, and quickly disperse? The dinner table is a great place to learn about sharing, but so are playing games with the kids.

                                Playing games like Lego is a great way to introduce sharing and respect. You can build a tower together, something simple and fun, and take turns adding pieces onto the building or swapping pieces if you are building your own world instead.

                                2. Let Your Children Answer for Themselves

                                My job is as a martial arts coach, which is a fun job, by the way. We’ll get to this in a minute, but I wanted to share a really common observation that we see at the academy.

                                When children come for their first class, they may be as young as four years old or as old as 12 in our kids’ programs. All the coaches are interested in why the kids want to try a class and what the parents want their child to learn. When we first meet a child, we’ll get down to their height level, as it’s not respectful to tower over the young kids and talk down.

                                Now we’re at eye level, we’ll smile, greet the child by their name, and ask them a question like “who is your favourite superhero?” so we can build a little rapport before the bigger questions. After only a few seconds, the parents will often step in and answer for them.

                                This can happen regardless of whether their child is four or 12 years old. To be honest with ourselves, we’ve probably all done this at some time with our kids and even our partners. It’s well-intentioned, but the problem is that when we step in.

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                                We’re not showing our kids respect, as we’re not valuing their opinions. It may be that it just takes them longer to have their say in a new situation. We rescue our kids because we think of them as shy or low in confidence. But if we’re doing this a lot, we’re stopping the flow of respect.

                                Let them struggle, let them think for themselves, and show them some patience. They won’t always reply, but you’ll be amazed to see that they’ll persevere more often than not to communicate in their preferred way.

                                The problem is that when we interject for our kids, two things can happen:

                                • We reinforce that their opinion isn’t valued, and/or;
                                • We rescue the less socially confident (shy) children from an uncomfortable situation that inhibits them from developing skills for the future.

                                Instead of jumping in to do things for our kids or answer for them, let them answer, struggle, and think for themselves. You’ll be amazed at how their sense of personal significance will grow. When children are more confident and capable—even in uncomfortable situations—the respect will flow more freely.

                                The secret is not to make a big deal of it, whether they speak up or not. But let them have a little time to try, then continue if there’s no progress this time. Maybe next time, there will be progress as their confidence grows.

                                3. The Role Model Soapbox

                                Of all the ways that we can teach respect, leading by example is the hardest. Let’s face it, we all think that our kids should “just do as I say, not as I do.” But it rarely works like this in life.

                                I remember taking my daughter out to a pub for lunch when she was of an age that she still used a high chair. We were meeting a friend of mine as he was having a few problems at home and wanted to catch up and chat. Hannah, my daughter, was served first at the pub with her lunch, myself next, and my friend who we’ll call Dave was served last. We were just about to start eating when Dave looked at his food, slapped the plate back at the waitress, and shouted “It’s the wrong order, go fix it now!”

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                                Dave was tired and stressed, it’s why we were meeting up. However, it’s not an excuse to be a lousy role model not having empathy, respect, and self-control in front of Hannah. In this instance, I felt the need to apologize to the waitress and so did Dave.

                                However, I appreciate that we all have those times in our lives, like Dave, when everything is going wrong. It’s easy to say, “you should stay calm, stay in control and show understanding to others.” But the reality is that the actions we should take are simple to talk about but harder to put into practice. But we have to try and find the energy to show our kids some respect and dig deep for those times that we need the energy to be patient.

                                Give Your Child a Little Patience

                                Many times, when our kids are behaving “out of sort,” they’ve just forgotten or missed the cue to show the right behavior. We’ve all been so deep into a task that we’ve missed our name being called or we’ve been tired and replied in a poor way out of instinct. A little patience with our kids is sometimes needed if this is the case. It’s the right way to demonstrate respect to them—asking good questions, especially if they mess up, rather than snapping and demanding that they listen the first time. We’re their parent, after all, they should do as they are told!

                                You’re going to experience when your child says “I hate you” or “wish you were not my mum or dad.” You may even hear this from your kids when they are as young as four years old. Remember the movie I was talking about? Kids will mimic what they see and hear. It does not mean that they really meant the words they just used. It’s usually just a gut response when angry. You can reply, “what made you feel like this?” They will usually feel better and get a more useful response than when you use “go to your room, now!”

                                So, leading by example is a little more than being a role model. It’s also showing your kids respect and treating them as a person rather than trying to completely control them and finding patience. This sounds like hard work, so maybe a little outsourcing of teaching children about respect is okay.

                                A Little Outsourcing May Be a Good Thing

                                I mentioned that you should not outsource teaching respect, but some activities can make a big difference. Yes, I’m about to contradict myself and talk about martial arts. When you think of martial arts, men in white pajamas bowing to each other, kneeling, and listening patiently to the sensei “teacher” often come to mind.

                                Many martial arts clubs have moved on to t-shirts and jogging style trousers but kept the rituals that help build respect and character. There are a lot of routines within the martial arts that are great habits for kids to learn, which will guide them in learning about respect.

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                                Training with a partner also helps improve yourself. It teaches your kid about being responsible for their uniform, training equipment, and even the academy. Our students all help clean the mats that they train on, tidy equipment away after each activity, and stand quietly at attention. These are great life lessons that teach your children respect as well.

                                Only 3 Ways to Teach Respect? Is That All You Have to Do?

                                We all want to teach our children about respect because we know it’s going to help them be more successful and happier in life. There isn’t an age that’s too early to start the learning. Sharing is an approach that you can start at a young age, but it’s okay to value your child’s needs, too. So, if they have a favorite toy and do not want to share it, this is okay as long as they’re sharing overall.

                                Next, let your child answer for themselves. To be honest, this is the hardest as the silence can get uncomfortable, but you have to persevere and let them try to answer for themselves. This small activity makes a big difference in the long run and kids get better as they grow in confidence.

                                Lastly, there’s the “role model soap box.” It’s probably the strongest influence on our kids at an early age as they look up to their parents a lot. Just remember that for those days when you feel cranky and tired, practice a little patience, and if you get something wrong, you may need to apologize.

                                You can always outsource some of your kids’ learning to a great activity, such as martial arts. If you’re going down this route, look for a club that has a character development program. You’ll find that the lessons on respect are more direct rather than being just implied through traditions and rituals. My final remark on teaching children about respect is that if you have kids that are strong visual and audible learners, try to take advantage of them. Sesame Street has some great video lessons on the topic that can help.

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                                Featured photo credit: Adrià Crehuet Can via unsplash.com

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