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10 Traps Most Women Over 30 Fall Into. Read This If You Want To Be The Survivors

10 Traps Most Women Over 30 Fall Into. Read This If You Want To Be The Survivors

Your twenties are for figuring out how to be an adult and making mistakes along the way. Once you turn thirty, you have had a decade of experience behind you and realize what is no longer acceptable for your life. For me, I realized when I was almost thirty that I needed to learn how to get in control of my finances and personal budget.

Read on to see a few things that do not cut it anymore.

1. Ignoring the benefits of physical exercise will lead to a lifetime of bad health

In your twenties, your body may have been more forgiving when you went weeks without exercising, but now that you are older your body cannot be neglected anymore. I know that a late night eating binge is much harder on my body now, than in my twenties when my metabolism was much faster. Making it a priority to get daily exercise, is of the utmost importance not only for maintaining your current health, but also even more so as you get older. No matter how busy your schedule gets, you can always make room for a thirty minute walk around the block or a quick jog through a nearby park.

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2. Tolerating worthless guys will lead to you always dating someone who doesn’t care about your well-being

Throughout your twenties you put up with a lot of guys who you knew deep down were not worthy of your time. Waiting for that guy from last night to call or playing the is-he-into-me game over and over in your head. I spent many nights waiting for “Mr. Right” to call. Now that you are older and wiser, you know your self-worth and realize that you deserve a guy who knows how to treat a woman and is not afraid of commitment.

3. Considering junk food a meal when really it is poisoning your body

It can be easy as a young adult when you are broke to get dinner from McDonald’s or eat instant ramen for the third time in a week. As you get older you realize how much damage you are doing to your body and the importance of nourishing it with wholesome meals. I used to consider junk food a viable meal, but now I cringe when I think about all the chemicals I put into my body. Instead of scarfing a whole bag of potato chips, from now on you should go for apple slices with peanut butter. Not as exciting, but your body will definitely thank you in the long run.

4. Being ashamed about who you are will disable you from reaching your dreams

In your twenties you felt like you had to hide certain parts of who you were if they were not socially acceptable, for example wanting to become a writer instead of working in marketing. I am embracing the fact that I am a writer and although I still sometimes feel insecure about this career path, I know it’s the right choice for me. You now realize that life is short and it’s important to embrace who you are, no matter what society thinks.

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5. Ignoring your mental health can create a domino effect into all areas of your life

Adult life can be immensely stressful and as a twenty-something it was easier to deal with issues by drowning yourself in a tub of ice cream and binge watching your favorite TV show. I know I had my fair share of nights at home, soothing my pain with chocolates and wine. As a woman in your thirties you realize there is now a much better way to deal with life’s hardships, whether it is taking time to meditate for a few minutes in the morning or seeing a therapist every week.

6. Comparing yourself to others will only make you feel worthless

One of the most toxic habits of your twenties was constantly comparing yourself with your peers, whether it was virtually or in real life. I realize how toxic social media like Facebook and Instagram can be and try to catch myself when I begin to fanitcise about other people’s so-called perfect life. You now realize this only caused more pain and that most importantly no one’s life is perfect, even if their Instagram feed says otherwise.

7. Not standing up for yourself will prevent you from reaching your goals

There were plenty of moments throughout your twenties when you looked back and wished you had been more assertive, whether it was at work or in your personal life. I used to be terrified that I would say something wrong and die of embaressement, but now I know it is better to speak-up and have your opinions heard. As a thirty-something you now know how important it is to have your voice heard, especially since no one else is going to do it for you.

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8. Superficial friendships only suck your valuable time and energy

In you twenties having a large social circle was enjoyable, even if you did not necessary like everyone in it. In your thirties you have now come to realize the importance of having a few true friends instead. In my thirties, I am truly beginning to realize quality over quantity with my friendships and that having a few close friends is much more important than having a dozen friends that you only know on the surface.

9. Not indulging in a few expensive items will make you realize your house is filled with cheap things you often have to replace

Being a frugal twenty-something, buying cheap clothes and accessories seemed to make sense. Now that you are in your thirties you see the importance of buying a few important items that are of quality and that you will be able to use for a very long time. I used to think cheaper is better, but after realizing that I was actually spending more than I thought when I had to replace an item after a few months, I realized the importance of upgrading to better quality.

10. Not knowing how to cook will lead to you having to get take-out for dinner parties

As a young adult it is easier to get away with only knowing how to cook pasta and scrambled eggs, but now that you are older it is important to know how to make several healthy of dishes that will not only give you variety in your daily meals, but also are great for when friends come over for dinner. I realized there is nothing that compares to a home-cooked meal because it’s something you can truly be proud of as a host.

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Featured photo credit: KieferPix via shutterstock.com

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Last Updated on June 24, 2019

Why Social Media Might Be Causing Depression

Why Social Media Might Be Causing Depression

A study [1] published in Depression and Anxiety found that social media users are more likely to be depressed. This was just one of the huge number of studies linking social media and depression[2] . But why exactly do platforms like Facebook and Instagram make people so unhappy? Well, we don’t know yet for sure, but there are some explanations.

Social Media Could Lead to Depression

Depression is a serious medical condition that affects how you think, feel, and behave. Social media may lead to depression in predisposed individuals or make existing symptoms of depression[3] worse explains[4] the study above’s senior author Dr. Brian Primack. So, the problem may not be in social media per se, but how we use it.

Signs You’re Suffering From “Social Media Depression”

If you feel like social media is having a negative impact on your mood, then you may be suffering from “social media depression.” Look for symptoms like:

• low self-esteem,

• negative self-talk,

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• a low mood,

• irritability,

• a lack of interest in activities once enjoyed,

• and social withdrawal.

If you’ve had these symptoms for more than two weeks and if this is how you feel most of the time, then you are likely depressed. Although “social media depression “is not a term recognized in the medical setting, social media depression seems to be a real phenomenon affecting around 50% of social media users. As explained in a review study[5] published in Cyberpsychology, Behavior, and Social Networking, if a person has a certain predisposition to depression and other mental disorders, social media use may only worsen their mental health.

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Social Media Could Crush Self-Esteem

We know that social media and depression are in some way linked, but why is this so? Well, according to Igor Pantic, MD, Ph.D.[6], social media use skews your perception about other people’s lives and traits. To explain this further, most people like to portray an idealized image of their lives, personal traits, and appearance on sites like Facebook and Instagram. If you confuse this idealized image with reality, you may be under the false impression that everyone is better than you which can crush your self-esteem and lead to depression. This is especially true for teens and young adults who are more likely to compare themselves to others. If you already suffer from low self-esteem, the illusion that everyone has it better off than you will just make you feel worse.

Causing Social Isolation and Other Negative Emotions

Another commonly cited reason for the negative impact of social media on mental health is its link with social isolation. Depressed people are more likely to isolate themselves socially and chose only to interact indirectly through social media platforms. But communication online tends to be superficial and is lacking when compared to real-life interaction explains Panic. What this means is not that social media leads to isolation but the other way around, possibly explaining why we find so many depressed persons on these sites.

Lastly, social media use may generate negative emotions in you like envy, jealousy, dislike, loneliness, and many others and this may worsen your depressive symptoms.

Why We Need to Take This Seriously

Both depression and social media use are on the rise according to epidemiological studies. Since each one has an impact on the other, we have to start thinking of healthier ways to use social media. Teens and young adults are especially vulnerable to the negative impact of social media on mental health.

Advice on Social Media Use

Although these findings did not provide any cause-effect explanation regarding Facebook and depression[7], they still do prove that social media use may not be a good way to handle depression. For this reason, the leading authors of these studies gave some suggestions as to how clinicians and people can make use of such findings.

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One suggestion is that clinicians should ask patients about their social media habits. Then they can advise them on how to change their outlook on social media use or even suggest limiting their time spent on social media.

Some social media users may also exhibit addictive behavior; they may spend too much time due to compulsive urges. Any compulsive behavior is bound to lead to feelings of guilt which can worsen depressive symptoms.

Having Unhealthy Relationship with Social Media

If you feel like your relationship with social media is unhealthy, then consider the advice on healthy social media use provided by psychology experts from Links Psychology[8]:

Avoid negative social comparison – always keep in mind that how people portray themselves and their lives on social media is not a realistic picture, but rather an idealized one. Also, avoid comparing yourself to others because this behavior can lead to negative self-talk.

Remember that social media is not a replacement for real life – Social media is great for staying in touch and having fun, but it should never replace real-world interactions.

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Avoid releasing personal information – For your safety and privacy, make sure to be careful with what you post online.

Report users who bully and harass you – It’s easy to be a bully in the anonymous and distant world of social media. Don’t take such offense personally and report those who abuse social media to harass others.

The bits of advice listed above can help you establish a healthy relationship with social media. Always keep these things in mind to avoid losing an objective perspective of what social media is and how it is different from real life. If you are currently suffering from depression, talk to your doctor about what is bothering you so that you can get the treatment you need to get better. Tell your doctor about your social media use and see if they could give you some advice on this topic.

Reference

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