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6 Pieces Of Advice That Every Woman Should Refuse To Accept

6 Pieces Of Advice That Every Woman Should Refuse To Accept

Ladies, how often do you receive advice from others? Chances are, pretty frequently. This advice, whether requested or unsolicited, isn’t always the greatest.

Here are 6 pieces of advice that every woman should refuse to accept.

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1. That’s a male-dominated field – pick a job for women

In this article, Richard Branson responds to 9-year-old Annie’s letter to him that included blueprints of an aircraft she designed. Branson writes, “I also think it’s wonderful that you are looking at an industry that is largely made up by males. If you’re thinking about becoming an engineer or a pilot, then my advice is to go for it. Go out and grab it with both hands. The world needs more female engineers and pilots, and entrepreneurs. If you put your mind to it, you can achieve it – you’ve clearly got drive, which is a necessary quality of all these careers.”

2. It’s time for you to settle down and get married

That’s horrible advice. If you’re not ready to get married, don’t. Wait to get married until you really know yourself and you and your significant other both feel ready. Just because your friends are all settling down by a certain age doesn’t mean you need to.

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3. Stay in your relationship, no matter what

Breaking up from a serious dating relationship is never easy. Once you are married and add a couple kids to the mix, it’s even more complicated to end a relationship. However, that doesn’t mean you should always stay no matter what. There are times when staying in a relationship means living in a toxic, abusive environment. Better advice is to seek help to salvage an overall healthy relationship, and seek help to get out if you’re in an abusive situation.

4. You should have a kid

Women are given this advice all the time. Whether they are childless or have several kids already, women frequently receive unsolicited advice about having kids. When you decide to have children, if at all, the decision should be between you and your life partner. It’s a very personal decision that is not to be taken lightly and should not be based on pressure from others.

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5. You should put all your dreams on hold when you have kids

Life changes when you have kids. Suddenly, you may find your priorities change. However, this doesn’t mean every single one of your dreams needs to go on hold when you become a parent. I strongly believe every mother should pursue some interests aside from her children, so she can continue to learn and grow and cultivate her passions. It’s very beneficial to continue to dream.

6. You’re a bad mom if…(fill in the blank)…

Women make snarky comments all the time. You’re a bad mom if you don’t breastfeed. You’re a bad mom if you’re still breastfeeding your child at a certain age. You’re a bad mom if you’re too tired to exercise. You’re a bad mom if you choose the gym over hanging out with your child. You’re a bad mom if you don’t feed your kid all organic food. You’re a bad mom if you spend too much time in the kitchen cooking when you should be reading to your child. You’re a bad mom for teaching your kid academics when you should let him have freestyle play time. You’re a bad mom for so much play time; you need to teach your child math so she won’t fall behind. I see this type of behavior frequently among moms.

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Enough of the mommy wars already. More than likely, whether you’re busy climbing the corporate ladder or climbing out from under a pile of Cheerios, you’re a good mom. Focus on the needs and desires of your immediate family and make your decisions accordingly. Do your best to ditch the concept of being superwoman, and realize you will never please everybody. Find what works best for you and your loved ones, and don’t worry about the opinions of others.

Ladies, it’s time to live boldly and blaze your own trail.

Featured photo credit: Laura/Dita Margarita via flickr.com

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Dr. Kerry Petsinger

Entrepreneur, Mindset & Performance Coach, & Doctor of Physical Therapy

Feeling Stuck in Life? How to Never Get Stuck Again 5 Signs You’re Ready for a Career Change How to Find the Purpose of Life and Start Living a Fulfilling Life Don’t like your job? Here are some solutions. How People Make Decisions That Are Bad For Them

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Last Updated on July 10, 2020

How to Reinvent Yourself and Change Your Life

How to Reinvent Yourself and Change Your Life

There will always be times in your life when you may need to learn how to reinvent yourself. This could come when you experience a big change, such as leaving your job, moving on from a relationship, transferring to a new home, or losing a loved one. If you are going through a major shift in your life, you may have to find new ways of thinking or doing things, or risk failing to reach your full potential.

“When something bad happens, you have three choices. You can let it define you, let it destroy you, or you can let it strengthen you.”

Many people who dared to leave their old unhappy lives enabled themselves to pursue their passions and find a renewed zest for living. You can also achieve the same if you take a leap of faith and make things happen for yourself.

To help you always be at your best wherever you may be in your life, here are some practical tips on how to reinvent yourself.

The Reinvention Checklist

Before embarking on a journey of self-reinvention, you need to make sure that you have everything that you need to make the trip bump-proof. These things include:

Resilience

Problems and obstacles are guaranteed to happen. Some of them will be difficult and may knock you off course; the important thing, however, is that you learn from these difficulties, never lose focus, and always get back up. This requires building resilience to get through the tough times.

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Support

Humans are social beings. Although it is important that you learn to rely on yourself when facing any challenge, it is also important to have a support team that you can lean on to give you a boost when things get too tough and to correct you when you’re making mistakes.

The key is to find the right balance between independence and dependence. Don’t be afraid to be vulnerable and share the difficulties you’re facing. When you open up, you’ll find the people who are really going to be there for you.

Self-Care

During the process of learning how to reinvent yourself, you will have to pull yourself away from your old comfort zones, habits, roles, and self-perceptions. This can be difficult and cause you to question your self-worth, so it’s important to engage in self-care to maintain a positive outlook and keep your mind and body healthy as you face the challenges that await you. Self-care can include:

  • Participating in a hobby you enjoy
  • Spending time with your support system
  • Taking some time to walk in nature
  • Practicing loving-kindness meditation

Find what works for you and what helps you feel like your true self as you seek a reinvented version of you.

How to Reinvent Yourself

Once you’re sure that you’re equipped with all the tools in the self-reinvention checklist, you can begin your journey of learning how to reinvent yourself.

1. Discover Your Strengths

This step provides valuable information on how you deal with certain situations. If you have this information, you will be able to manage difficulties more efficiently.

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To find out what your strengths are, you can ask your friends and colleagues for feedback, engage in self-reflection, or try these 10 Ways to Find Your Own Personal Strengths.

2. Plan

This step calls for a thorough assessment of your current emotional, psychological, and financial status so that you can develop plans that are realistic and practical.

It’s okay to have ambitious dreams, but your plans have to be realistic. Making use of SMART goals can help you plan your life better.

You can also consult your mentor or life coach for practical tips and advice.

Ultimately, you’ll want to create specific long-term and short-term goals that you can create milestones for. By doing this, you’ll lay out a specific roadmap to your reinvented self.

3. Try Things Out

Sometimes, we don’t know if solutions actually work until we try them out. This is why it is important to experiment whenever possible, especially if you’re dealing with a career change. You may need to simply experiment in order to find the things you like. This can be the same with hobbies. If you’re not sure what you would like doing, accept invitations from friends to join them in their favorite sport or take a class, like pottery or photography.

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By seeing what’s out there in any area of your life, you’ll have a better chance of finding the things you enjoy and the goals you want to create.

4. Manage Your Finances Well

Changes may require a bit of money. If you’re shifting to a new career, you may have to pay for training. If you’re going through a tough divorce or having a hard time dealing with the death of a loved one, you may have to pay for therapy. If you’re moving to a new home, you’ll definitely have to pay a whole lot of expenses.

All of these things are possible, but it will require a bit of money savviness as you learn how to reinvent yourself. If you have that cushion, you’ll feel more comfortable straying from your current path to try new things.

5. Muster Your Courage

Fears and self-doubt may arise when you encounter difficulties and setbacks. Sometimes, they may also come when you’re taking risks. You have to manage these negative emotions well and not allow them to discourage you. Tap into your courage and try doing at least one new thing each week to develop it.

Learn how to deal with your self-doubts to move forward in this article: How Self Doubt Keeps You Stuck (And How to Overcome It)

6. Use Your Support Group

As stated above, you need to build a strong support group before you even start the process of reinventing yourself. Your group will keep you from taking wrong turns and encourage you when you get too weighed down by problems. Don’t be afraid to call them, or even ask them out for coffee if you need to vent about the current difficulties you’re facing.

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7. Remind Yourself Every Day of Your Commitment

Write your goals on different-sized cards and scatter them at home and at work in places where you can easily see them. This way, you will constantly be reminded of where you want to be. Remember, writing down your goals helps them stick[1].

8. Accept Failure, Learn, and Resume Your Journey

Failing is normal, especially when we’re trying out something new. When you fail, simply recognize it, learn from it, and move on. Failure, in the end, is the best way to learn what does and doesn’t work, and you simply won’t be able to learn how to reinvent yourself if you don’t accept the inevitable failures that await you.

Final Thoughts

If you truly want to learn how to reinvent yourself and live the life you desire, take the advice above and start taking action. It will take time, patience, and plenty of effort to make the change you want happen, but it will be all worth it.

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Featured photo credit: Ashley Rich via unsplash.com

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