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6 Pieces Of Advice That Every Woman Should Refuse To Accept

6 Pieces Of Advice That Every Woman Should Refuse To Accept

Ladies, how often do you receive advice from others? Chances are, pretty frequently. This advice, whether requested or unsolicited, isn’t always the greatest.

Here are 6 pieces of advice that every woman should refuse to accept.

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1. That’s a male-dominated field – pick a job for women

In this article, Richard Branson responds to 9-year-old Annie’s letter to him that included blueprints of an aircraft she designed. Branson writes, “I also think it’s wonderful that you are looking at an industry that is largely made up by males. If you’re thinking about becoming an engineer or a pilot, then my advice is to go for it. Go out and grab it with both hands. The world needs more female engineers and pilots, and entrepreneurs. If you put your mind to it, you can achieve it – you’ve clearly got drive, which is a necessary quality of all these careers.”

2. It’s time for you to settle down and get married

That’s horrible advice. If you’re not ready to get married, don’t. Wait to get married until you really know yourself and you and your significant other both feel ready. Just because your friends are all settling down by a certain age doesn’t mean you need to.

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3. Stay in your relationship, no matter what

Breaking up from a serious dating relationship is never easy. Once you are married and add a couple kids to the mix, it’s even more complicated to end a relationship. However, that doesn’t mean you should always stay no matter what. There are times when staying in a relationship means living in a toxic, abusive environment. Better advice is to seek help to salvage an overall healthy relationship, and seek help to get out if you’re in an abusive situation.

4. You should have a kid

Women are given this advice all the time. Whether they are childless or have several kids already, women frequently receive unsolicited advice about having kids. When you decide to have children, if at all, the decision should be between you and your life partner. It’s a very personal decision that is not to be taken lightly and should not be based on pressure from others.

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5. You should put all your dreams on hold when you have kids

Life changes when you have kids. Suddenly, you may find your priorities change. However, this doesn’t mean every single one of your dreams needs to go on hold when you become a parent. I strongly believe every mother should pursue some interests aside from her children, so she can continue to learn and grow and cultivate her passions. It’s very beneficial to continue to dream.

6. You’re a bad mom if…(fill in the blank)…

Women make snarky comments all the time. You’re a bad mom if you don’t breastfeed. You’re a bad mom if you’re still breastfeeding your child at a certain age. You’re a bad mom if you’re too tired to exercise. You’re a bad mom if you choose the gym over hanging out with your child. You’re a bad mom if you don’t feed your kid all organic food. You’re a bad mom if you spend too much time in the kitchen cooking when you should be reading to your child. You’re a bad mom for teaching your kid academics when you should let him have freestyle play time. You’re a bad mom for so much play time; you need to teach your child math so she won’t fall behind. I see this type of behavior frequently among moms.

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Enough of the mommy wars already. More than likely, whether you’re busy climbing the corporate ladder or climbing out from under a pile of Cheerios, you’re a good mom. Focus on the needs and desires of your immediate family and make your decisions accordingly. Do your best to ditch the concept of being superwoman, and realize you will never please everybody. Find what works best for you and your loved ones, and don’t worry about the opinions of others.

Ladies, it’s time to live boldly and blaze your own trail.

Featured photo credit: Laura/Dita Margarita via flickr.com

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Dr. Kerry Petsinger

Entrepreneur, Mindset & Performance Coach, & Doctor of Physical Therapy

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Last Updated on January 21, 2020

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

If I was a super hero I’d want my super power to be the ability to motivate everyone around me. Think of how many problems you could solve just by being able to motivate people towards their goals. You wouldn’t be frustrated by lazy co-workers. You wouldn’t be mad at your partner for wasting the weekend in front of the TV. Also, the more people around you are motivated toward their dreams, the more you can capitalize off their successes.

Being able to motivate people is key to your success at work, at home, and in the future because no one can achieve anything alone. We all need the help of others.

So, how to motivate people? Here are 7 ways to motivate others even you can do.

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1. Listen

Most people start out trying to motivate someone by giving them a lengthy speech, but this rarely works because motivation has to start inside others. The best way to motivate others is to start by listening to what they want to do. Find out what the person’s goals and dreams are. If it’s something you want to encourage, then continue through these steps.

2. Ask Open-Ended Questions

Open-ended questions are the best way to figure out what someone’s dreams are. If you can’t think of anything to ask, start with, “What have you always wanted to do?”

“Why do you want to do that?”

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“What makes you so excited about it?”

“How long has that been your dream?”

You need this information the help you with the following steps.

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3. Encourage

This is the most important step, because starting a dream is scary. People are so scared they will fail or look stupid, many never try to reach their goals, so this is where you come in. You must encourage them. Say things like, “I think you will be great at that.” Better yet, say, “I think your skills in X will help you succeed.” For example if you have a friend who wants to own a pet store, say, “You are so great with animals, I think you will be excellent at running a pet store.”

4. Ask About What the First Step Will Be

After you’ve encouraged them, find how they will start. If they don’t know, you can make suggestions, but it’s better to let the person figure out the first step themselves so they can be committed to the process.

5. Dream

This is the most fun step, because you can dream about success. Say things like, “Wouldn’t it be cool if your business took off, and you didn’t have to work at that job you hate?” By allowing others to dream, you solidify the motivation in place and connect their dreams to a future reality.

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6. Ask How You Can Help

Most of the time, others won’t need anything from you, but it’s always good to offer. Just letting the person know you’re there will help motivate them to start. And, who knows, maybe your skills can help.

7. Follow Up

Periodically, over the course of the next year, ask them how their goal is going. This way you can find out what progress has been made. You may need to do the seven steps again, or they may need motivation in another area of their life.

Final Thoughts

By following these seven steps, you’ll be able to encourage the people around you to achieve their dreams and goals. In return, you’ll be more passionate about getting to your goals, you’ll be surrounded by successful people, and others will want to help you reach your dreams …

Oh, and you’ll become a motivational super hero. Time to get a cape!

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Featured photo credit: Thought Catalog via unsplash.com

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