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6 Pieces Of Advice That Every Woman Should Refuse To Accept

6 Pieces Of Advice That Every Woman Should Refuse To Accept

Ladies, how often do you receive advice from others? Chances are, pretty frequently. This advice, whether requested or unsolicited, isn’t always the greatest.

Here are 6 pieces of advice that every woman should refuse to accept.

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1. That’s a male-dominated field – pick a job for women

In this article, Richard Branson responds to 9-year-old Annie’s letter to him that included blueprints of an aircraft she designed. Branson writes, “I also think it’s wonderful that you are looking at an industry that is largely made up by males. If you’re thinking about becoming an engineer or a pilot, then my advice is to go for it. Go out and grab it with both hands. The world needs more female engineers and pilots, and entrepreneurs. If you put your mind to it, you can achieve it – you’ve clearly got drive, which is a necessary quality of all these careers.”

2. It’s time for you to settle down and get married

That’s horrible advice. If you’re not ready to get married, don’t. Wait to get married until you really know yourself and you and your significant other both feel ready. Just because your friends are all settling down by a certain age doesn’t mean you need to.

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3. Stay in your relationship, no matter what

Breaking up from a serious dating relationship is never easy. Once you are married and add a couple kids to the mix, it’s even more complicated to end a relationship. However, that doesn’t mean you should always stay no matter what. There are times when staying in a relationship means living in a toxic, abusive environment. Better advice is to seek help to salvage an overall healthy relationship, and seek help to get out if you’re in an abusive situation.

4. You should have a kid

Women are given this advice all the time. Whether they are childless or have several kids already, women frequently receive unsolicited advice about having kids. When you decide to have children, if at all, the decision should be between you and your life partner. It’s a very personal decision that is not to be taken lightly and should not be based on pressure from others.

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5. You should put all your dreams on hold when you have kids

Life changes when you have kids. Suddenly, you may find your priorities change. However, this doesn’t mean every single one of your dreams needs to go on hold when you become a parent. I strongly believe every mother should pursue some interests aside from her children, so she can continue to learn and grow and cultivate her passions. It’s very beneficial to continue to dream.

6. You’re a bad mom if…(fill in the blank)…

Women make snarky comments all the time. You’re a bad mom if you don’t breastfeed. You’re a bad mom if you’re still breastfeeding your child at a certain age. You’re a bad mom if you’re too tired to exercise. You’re a bad mom if you choose the gym over hanging out with your child. You’re a bad mom if you don’t feed your kid all organic food. You’re a bad mom if you spend too much time in the kitchen cooking when you should be reading to your child. You’re a bad mom for teaching your kid academics when you should let him have freestyle play time. You’re a bad mom for so much play time; you need to teach your child math so she won’t fall behind. I see this type of behavior frequently among moms.

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Enough of the mommy wars already. More than likely, whether you’re busy climbing the corporate ladder or climbing out from under a pile of Cheerios, you’re a good mom. Focus on the needs and desires of your immediate family and make your decisions accordingly. Do your best to ditch the concept of being superwoman, and realize you will never please everybody. Find what works best for you and your loved ones, and don’t worry about the opinions of others.

Ladies, it’s time to live boldly and blaze your own trail.

Featured photo credit: Laura/Dita Margarita via flickr.com

More by this author

Dr. Kerry Petsinger

Entrepreneur, Mindset & Performance Coach, & Doctor of Physical Therapy

Feeling Stuck in Life? How to Never Get Stuck Again How to Find the Purpose of Life and Start Living a Fulfilling Life Don’t like your job? Here are some solutions. How People Make Decisions That Are Bad For Them How to Have a Successful Career and a Fulfilling Personal Life

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Last Updated on December 10, 2019

5 Smart Reasons to Start Journal Writing Today

5 Smart Reasons to Start Journal Writing Today

Here’s the truth: your effectiveness at life is not what it could be. You’re missing out.

Each day passes by and you have nothing to prove that it even happened. Did you achieve something? Go on a date? Have an emotional breakthrough? Who knows?

But what you do know is that you don’t want to make the same mistakes that you’ve made in the past.

Our lives are full of hidden gems of knowledge and insight, and the most recent events in our lives contain the most useful gems of all. Do you know why? It’s simple, those hidden lessons are the most up to date, meaning they have the largest impact on what we’re doing right now.

But the question is, how do you get those lessons? There’s a simple way to do it, and it doesn’t involve time machines:

Journal writing.

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Improved mental clarity, the ability to see our lives in the big picture, as well as serving as a piece of evidence cataloguing every success we’ve ever had; we are provided all of the above and more by doing some journal writing.

Journal writing is a useful and flexible tool to help shed light on achieving your goals.

Here’s 5 smart reasons why you should do journal writing:

1. Journals Help You Have a Better Connection with Your Values, Emotions, and Goals

By journaling about what you believe in, why you believe it, how you feel, and what your goals are, you understand your relationships with these things better. This is because you must sort through the mental clutter and provide details on why you do what you do and feel what you feel.

Consider this:

Perhaps you’ve spent the last year or so working at a job you don’t like. It would be easy to just suck it up and keep working with your head down, going on as if it’s supposed to be normal to not like your job. Nobody else is complaining, so why should you, right?

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But a little journal writing will set things straight for you. You don’t like your job. You feel like it’s robbing you of happiness and satisfaction, and you don’t see yourself better there in the future.

The other workers? Maybe they don’t know, maybe they don’t care. But you do, you know and care enough to do something about it. And you’re capable of fixing this problem because your journal writing allows you to finally be honest with yourself about it.

2. Journals Improve Mental Clarity and Help Improve Your Focus

If there’s one thing journal writing is good for, it’s clearing the mental clutter.

How does it work? Simply, whenever you have a problem and write about it in a journal, you transfer the problem from your head to the paper. This empties the mind, allowing allocation of precious resources to problem-solving rather than problem-storing.

Let’s say you’ve been juggling several tasks at work. You’ve got data entry, testing, e-mails, problems with the boss, and so on—enough to overwhelm you—but as you start journal writing, things become clearer and easier to understand: Data entry can actually wait till Thursday; Bill kindly offered earlier to do my testing; For e-mails, I can check them now; the boss is just upset because Becky called in sick, etc.

You become better able to focus and reason your tasks out, and this is an indispensable and useful skill to have.

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3. Journals Improve Insight and Understanding

As a positive consequence of improving your mental clarity, you become more open to insights you may have missed before. As you write your notes out, you’re essentially having a dialogue with yourself. This draws out insights that you would have missed otherwise; it’s almost as if two people are working together to better understand each other. This kind of insight is only available to the person who has taken the time to connect with and understand themselves in the form of writing.

Once you’ve gotten a few entries written down, new insights can be gleaned from reading over them. What themes do you see in your life? Do you keep switching goals halfway through? Are you constantly dating the same type of people who aren’t good for you? Have you slowly but surely pushed people out of your life for fear of being hurt?

All of these questions can be answered by simply self-reflecting, but you can only discover the answers if you’ve captured them in writing. These questions are going to be tough to answer without a journal of your actions and experiences.

4. Journals Track Your Overall Development

Life happens, and it can happen fast. Sometimes we don’t take the time to stop and look around at what’s happening to us at each moment. We don’t get to see the step-by-step progress that we’re making in our own lives. So what happens? One day it’s the future, and you have no idea how you’ve gotten there.

Journal writing allows you to see how you’ve changed over time, so you can see where you did things right, and you can see where you took a misstep and fell.

The great thing about journals is that you’ll know what that misstep was, and you can make sure it doesn’t happen again—all because you made sure to log it, allowing yourself to learn from your mistakes.

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5. Journals Facilitate Personal Growth

The best thing about journal writing is that no matter what you end up writing about, it’s hard to not grow from it. You can’t just look at a past entry in which you acted shamefully and say “that was dumb, anyway!” No, we say “I will never make a dumb choice like that again!”

It’s impossible not to grow when it comes to journal writing. That’s what makes journal writing such a powerful tool, whether it’s about achieving goals, becoming a better person, or just general personal-development. No matter what you use it for, you’ll eventually see yourself growing as a person.

Kickstart Journaling

How can journaling best be of use to you? To vent your emotions? To help achieve your goals? To help clear your mind? What do you think makes journaling such a useful life skill?

Know the answer? Then it’s about time you reap the benefits of journal writing and start putting pen to paper.

Here’s what you can do to start journaling:

Featured photo credit: Jealous Weekends via unsplash.com

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