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Cliche Remarks that Go Nowhere in Conversation

Cliche Remarks that Go Nowhere in Conversation

It’s no secret that people overuse cliches. If these phrases weren’t overused, they wouldn’t be cliches, would they? When these phrases are used, though, the speaker’s lack of personality, originality, and interest shines right through. They might as well hold up a sign that says “I don’t care enough about this conversation to come up with something personable to say!” I’m not saying this is always the case, but you should always take care not to say any of the following in order to avoid annoying or insulting the person you’re speaking with.

1. “At the end of the day…”

People throw this around as if to say “regardless of everything else you just said, what I’m about to say is the only thing that matters.” It doesn’t matter how valid the other person’s point is; it’s not being taken into consideration. Using this cliche shows a lack of critical thinking skills, and that the speaker only thinks in terms of black and white. “At the end of the day, [arbitrary decision] must be done, no questions asked.” Why not? Are you afraid someone actually might bring up a good idea that you won’t be able to refute?

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2. “I know what you mean…”

Do you really? Granted, this is usually used by those who have been doing whatever they can do comfort a distraught friend, and sometimes enough is enough. But rather than being honest with the friend who seems intent on bringing everyone else around him down to his level, you swallow your pride and keep “yes-ing” him to death. You’re not doing him any favors by agreeing with him on points that you don’t actually agree with. And you’re definitely not helping yourself by wasting your time in a cyclical, one-sided conversation, either.

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3. “With all due respect…”

Nothing good ever comes after those four words. If someone ever says that to you, what they really mean is: “I’m about to say something really mean, but I don’t want you to think I’m actually that rude…even though I am.” People tend to think that prefacing a jabbing statement with “with all due respect” totally absolves them of any backlash from the person they’re speaking to. It doesn’t work that way. You’re going to hurt someone’s feelings, and they’re going to retaliate one way or another.

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4. “Isn’t that always the way?”

This goes along with “I know what you mean.” It usually goes along with listening to a friend’s sob story about how their girlfriend dumped them, or they got laid off from their job, or they just had a terrible day. Though you do care about them, saying something like this usually means “I care about you, but not enough to give you some helpful advice.” Although I can’t blame you if the person dumping their problems on you never takes your advice in the first place. In that case, I guess you could resort to this cliche. If they’re not really listening anyway, what difference does your response make?

5. “It is what it is”

Coming full circle, saying “it is what it is” generally means “I definitely disagree with the way things are, but who am I to change them?” This is a defeatist attitude that goes against everything we’ve been taught our entire lives. Nothing truly ever “is what it is”; things are the way they are because people allow them to be that way. It’s sort of the opposite of “at the end of the day.” While “at the end of the day” tends to come from someone in a supervisory position and is directed at an employee, “it is what it is” is usually a colleague-to-colleague statement lamenting the current situation they both find themselves in. Don’t ever let yourself be so downtrodden that you truly believe you can’t make a difference.

Featured photo credit: Bored / Paul Want via farm8.staticflickr.com

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Last Updated on February 18, 2019

Why It’s Never Too Late To Redefine Yourself

Why It’s Never Too Late To Redefine Yourself

The ability to reinvent and redefine yourself is a bold, daring and purposeful choice. It doesn’t just happen. You have to make a conscious, intentional choice and then follow through.

If the thought of forging a new path, changing habits, thought patterns and your inner circle of friends scares you – you’re not alone. Change can be a very scary thing. It takes courage, fortitude and a bit of faith to decide to shed your old self and don a new persona. However, it is one of the most critical processes one must repeatedly endure in the pursuit of destiny. Change unlocks new levels of potential.

The Need for Change

Everyday when we wake up, we make a decision. We decide to follow our routine or we decide to go off script and shake things up a bit. For those who are creatures of habit, routine is comfortable, easy and produces very little stress. The problem with this is, after a while you stop growing.

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We all reinvent ourselves at some point in our lives. It is absolutely necessary to achieve certain levels of success.

Reflect back on who you were as a teenager and then who you were at 25. Those are two very different people. Most of us are completely different. Your thought patterns changed, your appearance, job, level of education and even your friends– changed. We like to refer to this as “growing up” or maturing and consider it to be one of life’s natural progressions. However the changes you made were purposeful and deliberate.

This process must be a lifelong and continuous cycle. You are never too old to refresh yourself.

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Happy_old_man

    Signs It’s Time to Redefine

    “Just as established products and brands need updating to stay alive and vibrant, you periodically need to refresh or reinvent yourself.”– Mireille Guiliano

    So how do you know when it’s time for a system upgrade? There are signs along the way that alert you that it is time for an overhaul. The first sign is the feeling of being stuck. If you feel like you are in a rut, you’re bored with life or you need some newness and excitement, a self reinvention may be in order. Re-evaluate your life vision and your goals. Is that vision still valid and are your goals consistent with your vision and–are they achievable? If you are off course, it’s time for a change. If you are not moving forward and making progress, it’s time for a change.

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    In life, there’s no such thing as neutrality–you’re either moving forward or you are moving backward. Time constantly moves forward and if you are standing still, you are actually losing ground. No matter your age or stage in life– there is always room for improvement.

    “You’re never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream.” ~C. S. Lewis

    The second sign that you are due for a change is the occurrence of major life events in which change is forced upon you. Getting married, starting a new job, being promoted, ending a relationship, becoming a parenting or relocating are all prime opportunities to completely overhaul your life.

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    When these major shifts occur in your life–you have to shift with them. You can’t have a single mentality and have a successful marriage. You can’t remain selfish and irresponsible, and raise a healthy, well-adjusted child. You can’t be promoted to a supervisory position and keep the same subordinate attitude. Each level of success requires something different from you.

    Aronld in Predator

      Consider, for a moment, Arnold Schwarzenegger. People may have different opinions about his character and some of his life choices, but he is a master at reinventing himself. He achieved the ultimate success as a professional body builder by earning the title “Mr. Universe” three times. He then earned a tremendous amount of fame and fortune in the entertainment industry making action/adventure films. And in his latest role, he served two terms as the Governor of California. He succeeded as a professional body builder, a film star and a politician. Each role required massive amounts of change, commitment, strength and hard work.

      And if Arnold can do it…so can you!

      Featured photo credit: BK via flickr.com

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