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Read This If You Don’t Want To Miss Your True Love.

Read This If You Don’t Want To Miss Your True Love.

It has captivated men and women in every era, on every continent, from every culture. It has caused wars and ended them, it has brought the deepest despair and the highest joy. It is free, but it costs absolutely everything. More than anything, it gives hope. Two out of every three songs is written about it. Countless amounts of literature has been devoted to its topic.What are we talking about? Love.

So hard to find and maintain, but once attained it is a priceless treasure. Here are some of the reasons that so many miss out on finding their true love, and hopefully they will help you avoid the same mistakes in your relationship journeys.

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“There is one true love out there waiting for me.”

I call this the “Disney Syndrome.” Too often people miss the love of their life because they are looking for the wrong kind of guy or girl–the one of their dreams. I am an engaged man–to the most amazing woman in the world: Kelsey–and I wish I could tell you our whole story because it is beautiful. But it is not a Disney fairytale. I met Kels my sophomore year of college (her freshman year) and quickly fell for her. Long story short, she friend-zoned me because I wasn’t the kind of guy she was looking for. We didn’t talk for two years. But through a series of events (long story short, again), we rekindled that flame and now we are getting married in April. Disney fairytale? No. But romantic and perfect? Absolutely. So stop looking for the “perfect person” because he/she doesn’t exist. Look for the man or woman who brings out the best AND the worst in you–the best because he/she makes you better and the worst because the most loving relationships sharpen each other.

“Love is all happiness”

Love is one of the greatest joys, but people seem to ignore how hard it is. Love is not simply the feelings that arise when you think of that special someone–love is an action, a choice. Love is intentional and requires effort. Love is the greatest investment–it requires you to put time and effort into it, but the rewards are worth so much more.

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“With my true love, romance will never die”

Love occurs between two people. Did you catch that? Love happens between two HUMANS. No human being is perfect. We hurt each other–intentionally and unintentionally. We do and say dumb things. We make mistakes. The pitfall of many doomed couples is that they are looking for someone who will make them feel giddy constantly, so they ditch each other when things get hard or arguments stifle the romance. But the best romance is fought for; the best romance is made.

“My true love will have everything in common with me”

Although it is true that similarities can draw couples closer, differences are what sustain relationships. If you dated or married someone exactly like you, it would be boring and awful. Nobody wants to date themselves (okay, maybe Donald Trump…). The spice of relationships is the differences between each of you. Kels is more artistic and outgoing while I am more detail-oriented, organized and less outgoing. My life was fine before her, but with her (and because of her differences in personality and tastes in activities) I have adventures that I never would have on my own. People are meant to complement each other–I fill in where she lacks and she graciously does the same for me. Together we make a whole.

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“My true love will complete me”

This is where many relationships fall off the rails. This statement makes the underlying assumption that another person is capable of fulfilling all of your wants and needs. This is so far from the truth and terribly unfair to your significant other. This assumption puts unrealistic pressure on your significant other to satisfy all of your desires. No one person can do that. It is impossible.

A fulfilling life is more dynamic that simply having another person fix it for you. Having a partner can make life so much better, but you must have goals and dreams outside of your relationship. Do other things–ride a bicycle, learn magic tricks, do yoga–ANYTHING that brings satisfaction outside of your significant other. If all you are doing is taking from your true love, you have no new love to give back to them–and eventually they won’t be able to meet your unrealistic standards for them.

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Featured photo credit: james j8246 via flickr.com

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Austen Broome

Social Media/Public Relations Manager and Copywriter for Liquid Creative

Life After Graduation: How To Make The Most Of It What To Expect During Engagement Read This If You Don’t Want To Miss Your True Love. 20 Ways Men Can Feel Fulfilled In A Relationship 8 Tactics To Make What You Say Sound Smarter And More Eloquent

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Last Updated on October 17, 2019

How to Spend More Quality Time with Your Partner

How to Spend More Quality Time with Your Partner

You see your partner every single day. They are the first person you talk to in the morning and the last person you kiss goodnight.

But does seeing each other day in and day out equal a healthy relationship? Not necessarily.

Spending quality time with your partner is the best way to ensure your relationship stays healthy and strong. This means going above and beyond sitting together while you watch Netflix or going out for the occasional dinner. You deserve more from your relationship – and so does your spouse!

What does quality time mean? It means spending time with your spouse without interruption. It’s a chance for you to come together and talk. Communication will build emotional intimacy and trust.

Quality time is also about expressing love in a physical way. Not sex, necessarily (but that’s great, too!) but through hand-holding, cuddling, caressing, and tickling. Studies show that these displays of affection will boost partner satisfaction.[1]

So how do you spend quality time with your partner? Here are 13 relationship tips on making the most out of your time with your partner.

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1. Recognize the Signs

If you want a healthy relationship, you have to learn how to recognize the signs that you need to spend more quality time together.

Some telltale signs include:

  • You’re always on your phones.
  • You value friendships or hobbies over quality time with your spouse.
  • You aren’t together during important events.
  • You are arguing more often or lack connection.
  • You don’t make plans or date nights.
  • You’re not happy.

If you are experiencing any of these relationship symptoms, know that quality time together can reverse the negative effects of the signs above.

2. Try New Things Together

Have you ever wanted to learn how to play an instrument or speak another language? How about skydive or ballroom dance?

Instead of viewing these as solo hobbies and interests, why not involve your partner?

Trying new activities together builds healthy relationships because it encourages spouses to rely on one another for emotional and physical support.

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Shared hobbies also promote marital friendship, and the Journal of Happiness Studies found that marital satisfaction was twice as high for couples who viewed each other as best friends.[2]

3. Schedule in Tech-Free Time

Your phone is a great way to listen to music, watch videos, and keep up-to-date with friends and family. But is your phone good for your relationship?

Many couples phone snub, or ‘phub’, one another. Studies show that phubbing can lower relationship satisfaction and increase one’s chances of depression.[3]

Reduce those chances by removing distractions when spending quality time together and showing your partner they have your full attention.

4. Hit the Gym as a Couple

One way you can spend more time together as a couple is by becoming workout partners. Studies show that couples are more likely to stay with their exercise routine if they work out together.[4] Couples also work out harder than they would solo. One study found that 95 percent of couples who work out together maintained weight loss compares to the 66 percent of singles who did.[5]

Join a gym, do at-home couples’ workouts, try couples yoga, hit the hiking trails, or get your bikes out. No matter which way you choose to exercise, these healthy activities can promote a healthy relationship.

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5. Cook Meals Together

Pop open a bottle of wine or put some romantic music on while you get busy – in the kitchen, of course!

One of the best relationship tips for spending quality time together when you both have busy schedules is to cook meals together.[6]

Spice things up and try and prepare a four-course meal or a fancy French dish together. Not only is this a fun way to spend your time together, but it also promotes teamwork.

If all goes well, you’ll have a romantic date night meal at home that you prepared with your four hands. And if the food didn’t turn out the way you’d hoped, you are guaranteed to have a laugh and create new memories together.

6. Have a Regular Date Night

Couples experience a greater sense of happiness and less stress when they are spending quality time together.[7] One of the biggest relationship tips for a healthy partnership is to include a date night in your weekly routine.

The National Marriage Project found that having a weekly date night can make your relationship seem more exciting and helps prevent relationship boredom.[8] It also lowers the probability of divorce, improves your sex life, and increases healthy communication.

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Some great ideas for what to do on your date night include:

  • Have a movie marathon – Gather up your favorite flicks and cuddle up on the couch.
  • Play games together – Cards, board games, video games, and other creative outlets are a fun way to spend quality time together.
  • Recreate your first date – Go back to that restaurant and order the same meal you did when you first got together. You can spice up your evening by pretending you’re strangers meeting for the first time and see how sexy the night gets.
  • Plan a weekend getaway – There’s nothing better than traveling with the one you love.
  • Dinner and a movie – A classic!
  • Try a new restaurant – Make it your mission to rate and try all of the Mexican restaurants/Irish pubs/Italian trattorias in your area.
  • Have a long sex session – Intimacy promotes the release of the oxytocin hormone which is responsible for a myriad of great feelings.[9]

Here’re even more date night ideas for your reference: 50 Unique and Really Fun Date Ideas for Couples

Final Thoughts

The benefits of spending quality time together are endless. Here are just some of the ways it can contribute to a healthy relationship:

  • Improves emotional and physical intimacy
  • Lowers divorce rates
  • Improves communication
  • Reduces marital boredom
  • Bonds couples closer
  • Improves friendship
  • Boosts health
  • Reduces stress

These are all excellent reasons to start making date night a regular part of your week.

It’s easy to have a healthy relationship when you set aside dedicated time to share with your spouse. Try new things together, make your spouse your workout buddy, and look for innovative ways to be close and connected.

These relationship tips will bring great benefits to your marriage.

Featured photo credit: Allen Taylor via unsplash.com

Reference

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