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What I Learned From The Person Who I Thought I Would Grow Old With

What I Learned From The Person Who I Thought I Would Grow Old With

I didn’t just think of growing old with her, I thought I would visit a thousand places with her. She was perfect I guess, even in any sort of imperfection. It never happened fast or quick, it was something slow and insidious. Until I became encapsulated in the rain of love I never knew. Yet it never worked out. Here are some lessons I learned from the person I thought I would grow old with.

1. We are never afraid to be the victims or fools of love. We simply learn courage and resilience in the process.

2. It was never about where we were going to live or stay, it was just about being together.

3. I learned that compromise is never a weakness but strength. Because it does feel good to be with the one you care about and sometimes the sacrifices you have to make in the process could be what defines that.

4. With love there is so much depth and meaning.

5. You learn that there are no secrets, that somehow that person would always understand you better than anyone else ever will.

6. Every touch, every kiss, every hold meant something. And you wished it would last forever.

7. You never can fathom how another person can truly care about you. Something you will always wonder for a long time to come.

8. You are not afraid to be committed or to be in the other person’s arms, because in it is safety.

9. You are afraid of losing the other person.

10. One thing you will never stop learning is love, forgiveness, kindness, hope and joy.

11You want your kids, friends and relatives to discover this type of love.

12. You learn from the mistakes you made together.

13. Things may not work out the way you planned, but that is the reality of having something so perfect in an imperfect world.

14. Obsession is temporary; love is permanent.

15You cannot predict how things will turn out, because things often happen when you least expect them.

16. Time is the most important weapon when you need to heal.

17.You will learn that your emotions should be mastered by you alone.

18. The person you thought you will grow old with will teach you wisdom and experience. It is difficult to separate anything from the two.

19. Even in their departure they will create a channel for you to be able to move on without them.

20. You will forget the hurt, you will remember the gains.

21. They will teach you strength. And yes you may never have thought that you could ever become this strong.

22.What matters at the end of the day is that you are able to unleash that unapologetic and unadulterated version of you, because you gave them your very best.

23. Being with them may be the best thing you have done, but losing them will be the hardest.

24. Don’t be afraid of it – it is completely okay to be vulnerable.

25. Being in love and anticipating everything will work out with someone is an amazing feeling. But you can never ascertain how things will go.

26. What the person who you thought you will grow old with teaches you is patience. You have to learn to be patient to face the roller coaster of things that will happen to you in the process of being with that special one. Hope relies on patience too.

27. Whether you want to accept it or not the experience you had with that special person will play an extreme crucial role in your present and future beliefs.

28. Most importantly, learn to love unconditionally. It is never enough, but you can surely try.

My most cherished lesson from loving that person was to turn to writing my thoughts. When my mind was jumbled, writing served as a therapy to helping me go through whatever obstacles that came my way when it came to dealing with that special person.

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Featured photo credit: http://www.pixabay.com via pixabay.com

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Casey Imafidon

Specialized in motivation and personal growth, providing advice to make readers fulfilled and spurred on to achieve all that they desire in life.

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Last Updated on July 10, 2020

How to Reinvent Yourself and Change Your Life

How to Reinvent Yourself and Change Your Life

There will always be times in your life when you may need to learn how to reinvent yourself. This could come when you experience a big change, such as leaving your job, moving on from a relationship, transferring to a new home, or losing a loved one. If you are going through a major shift in your life, you may have to find new ways of thinking or doing things, or risk failing to reach your full potential.

“When something bad happens, you have three choices. You can let it define you, let it destroy you, or you can let it strengthen you.”

Many people who dared to leave their old unhappy lives enabled themselves to pursue their passions and find a renewed zest for living. You can also achieve the same if you take a leap of faith and make things happen for yourself.

To help you always be at your best wherever you may be in your life, here are some practical tips on how to reinvent yourself.

The Reinvention Checklist

Before embarking on a journey of self-reinvention, you need to make sure that you have everything that you need to make the trip bump-proof. These things include:

Resilience

Problems and obstacles are guaranteed to happen. Some of them will be difficult and may knock you off course; the important thing, however, is that you learn from these difficulties, never lose focus, and always get back up. This requires building resilience to get through the tough times.

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Support

Humans are social beings. Although it is important that you learn to rely on yourself when facing any challenge, it is also important to have a support team that you can lean on to give you a boost when things get too tough and to correct you when you’re making mistakes.

The key is to find the right balance between independence and dependence. Don’t be afraid to be vulnerable and share the difficulties you’re facing. When you open up, you’ll find the people who are really going to be there for you.

Self-Care

During the process of learning how to reinvent yourself, you will have to pull yourself away from your old comfort zones, habits, roles, and self-perceptions. This can be difficult and cause you to question your self-worth, so it’s important to engage in self-care to maintain a positive outlook and keep your mind and body healthy as you face the challenges that await you. Self-care can include:

  • Participating in a hobby you enjoy
  • Spending time with your support system
  • Taking some time to walk in nature
  • Practicing loving-kindness meditation

Find what works for you and what helps you feel like your true self as you seek a reinvented version of you.

How to Reinvent Yourself

Once you’re sure that you’re equipped with all the tools in the self-reinvention checklist, you can begin your journey of learning how to reinvent yourself.

1. Discover Your Strengths

This step provides valuable information on how you deal with certain situations. If you have this information, you will be able to manage difficulties more efficiently.

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To find out what your strengths are, you can ask your friends and colleagues for feedback, engage in self-reflection, or try these 10 Ways to Find Your Own Personal Strengths.

2. Plan

This step calls for a thorough assessment of your current emotional, psychological, and financial status so that you can develop plans that are realistic and practical.

It’s okay to have ambitious dreams, but your plans have to be realistic. Making use of SMART goals can help you plan your life better.

You can also consult your mentor or life coach for practical tips and advice.

Ultimately, you’ll want to create specific long-term and short-term goals that you can create milestones for. By doing this, you’ll lay out a specific roadmap to your reinvented self.

3. Try Things Out

Sometimes, we don’t know if solutions actually work until we try them out. This is why it is important to experiment whenever possible, especially if you’re dealing with a career change. You may need to simply experiment in order to find the things you like. This can be the same with hobbies. If you’re not sure what you would like doing, accept invitations from friends to join them in their favorite sport or take a class, like pottery or photography.

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By seeing what’s out there in any area of your life, you’ll have a better chance of finding the things you enjoy and the goals you want to create.

4. Manage Your Finances Well

Changes may require a bit of money. If you’re shifting to a new career, you may have to pay for training. If you’re going through a tough divorce or having a hard time dealing with the death of a loved one, you may have to pay for therapy. If you’re moving to a new home, you’ll definitely have to pay a whole lot of expenses.

All of these things are possible, but it will require a bit of money savviness as you learn how to reinvent yourself. If you have that cushion, you’ll feel more comfortable straying from your current path to try new things.

5. Muster Your Courage

Fears and self-doubt may arise when you encounter difficulties and setbacks. Sometimes, they may also come when you’re taking risks. You have to manage these negative emotions well and not allow them to discourage you. Tap into your courage and try doing at least one new thing each week to develop it.

Learn how to deal with your self-doubts to move forward in this article: How Self Doubt Keeps You Stuck (And How to Overcome It)

6. Use Your Support Group

As stated above, you need to build a strong support group before you even start the process of reinventing yourself. Your group will keep you from taking wrong turns and encourage you when you get too weighed down by problems. Don’t be afraid to call them, or even ask them out for coffee if you need to vent about the current difficulties you’re facing.

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7. Remind Yourself Every Day of Your Commitment

Write your goals on different-sized cards and scatter them at home and at work in places where you can easily see them. This way, you will constantly be reminded of where you want to be. Remember, writing down your goals helps them stick[1].

8. Accept Failure, Learn, and Resume Your Journey

Failing is normal, especially when we’re trying out something new. When you fail, simply recognize it, learn from it, and move on. Failure, in the end, is the best way to learn what does and doesn’t work, and you simply won’t be able to learn how to reinvent yourself if you don’t accept the inevitable failures that await you.

Final Thoughts

If you truly want to learn how to reinvent yourself and live the life you desire, take the advice above and start taking action. It will take time, patience, and plenty of effort to make the change you want happen, but it will be all worth it.

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Featured photo credit: Ashley Rich via unsplash.com

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