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Sometimes You Think Compromising Is The Only Way Out In Your Relationship. Actually It Isn’t.

Sometimes You Think Compromising Is The Only Way Out In Your Relationship. Actually It Isn’t.

In past relationships I have learned that no matter how hard you try to please someone in certain cases you will only fall short. Being in a relationship is not simply about giving but it is also about your partner understanding who you are. They should not force you to give more than you can. Rather they should accept you for your abilities.

You should not compromise any of these things in a relationship, rather you should find a point to reach an understanding with your partner.

1. You should love your partner but they should support your dreams

Sometimes we want to let go of our dreams simply because our partners want something else for us. If they love us or want to be part of our future they should support our dreams also.

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2. You have a new family but you cannot compromise on your family ties

Yes you want to build a new family with your partner. But you can’t simply throw away your family ties with your parents, relatives and siblings. Yes, all in-laws come with their baggage but you can always find a way to create a bridge between your families.

3. Your partner should be your best friend but you can’t throw away your former friendships

Your friends sometimes can be your best safety net. So you do not need to compromise your friendships for the sake of a relationship.

4. You should be committed to your partner but never abandon your career

It is never necessary for anyone to give up their career goals to make a relationship work. Rather it is important for you to work around your desires for what you want to achieve professionally in a mutually respectful manner.

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5. You do not want someone who opposes your values but you don’t need to change your values for a relationship

You shouldn’t be on the same page with your partner on everything. It is ideal for you to have a healthy and informed debate every now and then. You shouldn’t show ignorance and tolerate bigoted ideals simply because you want to make your relationship work.

6. You do not have to stop feeling good about yourself because of anyone

Anyone who makes you feel less confident about yourself is not the right person for you. You also do not have to change yourself implicitly because of anyone. Rather you should be with someone that makes you feel like you can be yourself.

7. When you are in love you should also be treated with respect

As much as love can involve making personal sacrifices, you also should also be shown respect when you are in a relationship with anyone. You should not let go of your self-worth because you are trying so hard to please another person.

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8. You should not compromise on humanity

There are many things that make you human, like compassion, an ability to forgive and to show empathy. You should not compromise on things that make you human.

9. You should not compromise on trust

We all want our partners to know that we can tolerate their mistakes and flaws. But even when we tolerate so much, we should be able to refuse to compromise on the importance of trust. This means we can continue to carry our relationships forward in a healthy manner.

10. You should think about the other person often but you should never compromise your intelligence

This is in regards to both your emotional and mental intelligence. While the other person should be a priority in your thoughts, never should that person make you feel stupid, weak or out of place in the relationship.

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11. You should never compromise your integrity

What matters most in your life and how much you adhere to certain standards or principles can define who you are. You should never compromise your identity in a relationship.

12. Learn that you are not perfect and either is your partner

Yes, you are imperfect and you will make mistakes. The other person should be able to forgive you when mistakes are made rather than demand perfection from you.

Featured photo credit: Kiselev Andrey Valerevich via shutterstock.com

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Casey Imafidon

Specialized in motivation and personal growth, providing advice to make readers fulfilled and spurred on to achieve all that they desire in life.

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Last Updated on December 10, 2019

5 Smart Reasons to Start Journal Writing Today

5 Smart Reasons to Start Journal Writing Today

Here’s the truth: your effectiveness at life is not what it could be. You’re missing out.

Each day passes by and you have nothing to prove that it even happened. Did you achieve something? Go on a date? Have an emotional breakthrough? Who knows?

But what you do know is that you don’t want to make the same mistakes that you’ve made in the past.

Our lives are full of hidden gems of knowledge and insight, and the most recent events in our lives contain the most useful gems of all. Do you know why? It’s simple, those hidden lessons are the most up to date, meaning they have the largest impact on what we’re doing right now.

But the question is, how do you get those lessons? There’s a simple way to do it, and it doesn’t involve time machines:

Journal writing.

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Improved mental clarity, the ability to see our lives in the big picture, as well as serving as a piece of evidence cataloguing every success we’ve ever had; we are provided all of the above and more by doing some journal writing.

Journal writing is a useful and flexible tool to help shed light on achieving your goals.

Here’s 5 smart reasons why you should do journal writing:

1. Journals Help You Have a Better Connection with Your Values, Emotions, and Goals

By journaling about what you believe in, why you believe it, how you feel, and what your goals are, you understand your relationships with these things better. This is because you must sort through the mental clutter and provide details on why you do what you do and feel what you feel.

Consider this:

Perhaps you’ve spent the last year or so working at a job you don’t like. It would be easy to just suck it up and keep working with your head down, going on as if it’s supposed to be normal to not like your job. Nobody else is complaining, so why should you, right?

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But a little journal writing will set things straight for you. You don’t like your job. You feel like it’s robbing you of happiness and satisfaction, and you don’t see yourself better there in the future.

The other workers? Maybe they don’t know, maybe they don’t care. But you do, you know and care enough to do something about it. And you’re capable of fixing this problem because your journal writing allows you to finally be honest with yourself about it.

2. Journals Improve Mental Clarity and Help Improve Your Focus

If there’s one thing journal writing is good for, it’s clearing the mental clutter.

How does it work? Simply, whenever you have a problem and write about it in a journal, you transfer the problem from your head to the paper. This empties the mind, allowing allocation of precious resources to problem-solving rather than problem-storing.

Let’s say you’ve been juggling several tasks at work. You’ve got data entry, testing, e-mails, problems with the boss, and so on—enough to overwhelm you—but as you start journal writing, things become clearer and easier to understand: Data entry can actually wait till Thursday; Bill kindly offered earlier to do my testing; For e-mails, I can check them now; the boss is just upset because Becky called in sick, etc.

You become better able to focus and reason your tasks out, and this is an indispensable and useful skill to have.

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3. Journals Improve Insight and Understanding

As a positive consequence of improving your mental clarity, you become more open to insights you may have missed before. As you write your notes out, you’re essentially having a dialogue with yourself. This draws out insights that you would have missed otherwise; it’s almost as if two people are working together to better understand each other. This kind of insight is only available to the person who has taken the time to connect with and understand themselves in the form of writing.

Once you’ve gotten a few entries written down, new insights can be gleaned from reading over them. What themes do you see in your life? Do you keep switching goals halfway through? Are you constantly dating the same type of people who aren’t good for you? Have you slowly but surely pushed people out of your life for fear of being hurt?

All of these questions can be answered by simply self-reflecting, but you can only discover the answers if you’ve captured them in writing. These questions are going to be tough to answer without a journal of your actions and experiences.

4. Journals Track Your Overall Development

Life happens, and it can happen fast. Sometimes we don’t take the time to stop and look around at what’s happening to us at each moment. We don’t get to see the step-by-step progress that we’re making in our own lives. So what happens? One day it’s the future, and you have no idea how you’ve gotten there.

Journal writing allows you to see how you’ve changed over time, so you can see where you did things right, and you can see where you took a misstep and fell.

The great thing about journals is that you’ll know what that misstep was, and you can make sure it doesn’t happen again—all because you made sure to log it, allowing yourself to learn from your mistakes.

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5. Journals Facilitate Personal Growth

The best thing about journal writing is that no matter what you end up writing about, it’s hard to not grow from it. You can’t just look at a past entry in which you acted shamefully and say “that was dumb, anyway!” No, we say “I will never make a dumb choice like that again!”

It’s impossible not to grow when it comes to journal writing. That’s what makes journal writing such a powerful tool, whether it’s about achieving goals, becoming a better person, or just general personal-development. No matter what you use it for, you’ll eventually see yourself growing as a person.

Kickstart Journaling

How can journaling best be of use to you? To vent your emotions? To help achieve your goals? To help clear your mind? What do you think makes journaling such a useful life skill?

Know the answer? Then it’s about time you reap the benefits of journal writing and start putting pen to paper.

Here’s what you can do to start journaling:

Featured photo credit: Jealous Weekends via unsplash.com

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