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12 Things To Remember If You Love Someone Who Is Low Maintenance But Has High Standards

12 Things To Remember If You Love Someone Who Is Low Maintenance But Has High Standards

There are a lot of things you should know if you love someone who is low maintenance but has high standards. For starters, they make great friends and are the best people to date. These people focus on what’s important, and disregard what they cannot control. Keep these twelve things in mind if you love someone who is low maintenance but has high standards.

1. We only fight when its important

We don’t start fights without a good reason. We might argue over big issues, but we ignore everything else. We like to focus on our relationships and the things that can be tweaked or improved. Communication is important in any relationship, but low maintenance people with high standards generally argue only when absolutely necessary and tend to give their significant other a lot of space. That is truly a wonderful thing to have.

2. We appreciate when something comes from the heart

We don’t expect you to fetch the moon and stars for us. Having said this, we like it when people take our preferences into consideration. There should be some meaning behind whatever it is you do for us. If you take the time to see what we like, we promise we will appreciate every little effort you put into for us.

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3. We want our relationships to be genuine

A relationship that is real will feel real. To us, truth and honesty are the best possible things to have in a relationship. This is why low maintenance but high standard people who are involved in relationships are so genuine and honest with not only themselves, but their partners as well. All of the qualities on this list, this one is my favorite.

4. We want people to be aware of our feelings without having to say anything

Sometimes two people in a relationship will understand each others feelings without having to say anything. This kind of relationship sets itself apart because there’s a sense of communication without actually having to communicate. Being aware of someone’s feelings is a wonderful and noble quality to have.

5. We want to go the extra mile to make the relationship unique

Contrary to “not trying in a relationship,” low maintenance people think that going out of the way for a relationship is what it’s all about. It makes a relationship more fulfilling and enriching. When you put in the extra effort to make a relationship feel unique, you wind up being closer to the other person than you could have ever previously imagined.

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6. We don’t complain unless absolutely necessary

We aren’t critical but will voice our beliefs if we need to. This is actually something to be proud of, because while it’s easy to complain all the time, only doing it when it matters is extraordinary.

7. We give our best in a relationship and we expect it in return

Having high standards means we want to give our best in a relationship. But while we give our one hundred percent, we also expect you to do your part! Only then can the relationship be at its peak and thrive.

8. We love to fuel our passions

High standards people want to take on the world and act on their beliefs. In other words, we are dreamers. We want to fly as high as we possibly can in life. We want the impossible to be possible, and we like to push the limits each and every time we can.

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9. We aren’t pushovers

Don’t think that you can tell us what to do. We like thinking for ourselves, and we prefer to keep it that way. Don’t ever tell us what to do, because you will it hear from us!

10. We are independent and like it that way

Our independence is one of our most prized possessions and we want you to respect us for that. Don’t make us dependent on anything! Let us do things for ourselves. If we need help, we will ask for it. Don’t cut in without us asking – we’d be furious!

11. We want you to respect us

Respect is important for us, especially in a lasting and loving relationship. Actually, having high standards for respect shouldn’t even need to be asked for – it’s simply common sense. Make sure you show us a whole lot of respect. Otherwise, we won’t be there for you for long! Our self-respect is equally important as yours in a relationship, and we make sure that point is stressed!

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12. We love expressing ourselves and our identity

Expression is a beautiful thing. Do whatever it takes to express yourself, and we will do the same. Believe in yourself and who you are, and don’t be afraid to express it. We will love you all the more. It’s important to be yourself in front of us because we love people who are genuine and remain genuine to us!

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Ramanpreet Kaur

Currently a student but don't know what direction to go in: Let us see if writing gets me anywhere :)

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Last Updated on May 21, 2019

How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

For all our social media bravado, we live in a society where communication is seen less as an art, and more as a perfunctory exercise. We spend so much time with people, yet we struggle with how to meaningfully communicate.

If you believe you have mastered effective communication, scan the list below and see whether you can see yourself in any of the examples:

Example 1

You are uncomfortable with a person’s actions or comments, and rather than telling the individual immediately, you sidestep the issue and attempt to move on as though the offending behavior or comment never happened.

You move on with the relationship and develop a pattern of not addressing challenging situations. Before long, the person with whom you are in relationship will say or do something that pushes you over the top and predictably, you explode or withdraw completely from the relationship.

In this example, hard-to-speak truths become never- expressed truths that turn into resentment and anger.

Example 2

You communicate from the head and without emotion. While what you communicate makes perfect sense to you, it comes across as cold because it lacks emotion.

People do not understand what motivates you to say what you say, and without sharing your feelings and emotions, others experience you as rude, cold or aggressive.

You will know this is a problem if people shy away from you, ignore your contributions in meetings or tell you your words hurt. You can also know you struggle in this area if you find yourself constantly apologizing for things you have said.

Example 3

You have an issue with one person, but you communicate your problem to an entirely different person.

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The person in whom you confide lacks the authority to resolve the matter troubling you, and while you have vented and expressed frustration, the underlying challenge is unresolved.

Example 4

You grew up in a family with destructive communication habits and those habits play out in your current relationships.

Because you have never stopped to ask why you communicate the way you do and whether your communication style still works, you may lack understanding of how your words impact others and how to implement positive change.

If you find yourself in any of the situations described above, this article is for you.

Communication can build or decimate worlds and it is important we get it right. Regardless of your professional aspirations or personal goals, you can improve your communication skills if you:

  • Understand your own communication style
  • Tailor your style depending on the needs of the audience
  • Communicate with precision and care
  • Be mindful of your delivery, timing and messenger

1. Understand Your Communication Style

To communicate effectively, you must understand the communication legacy passed down from our parents, grandparents or caregivers. Each of us grew up with spoken and unspoken rules about communication.

In some families, direct communication is practiced and honored. In other families, family members are encouraged to shy away from difficult conversations. Some families appreciate open and frank dialogue and others do not. Other families practice silence about substantive matters, that is, they seldom or rarely broach difficult conversations at all.

Before you can appreciate the nuance required in communication, it helps to know the familial patterns you grew up with.

2. Learn Others Communication Styles

Communicating effectively requires you to take a step back, assess the intended recipient of your communication and think through how the individual prefers to be communicated with. Once you know this, you can tailor your message in a way that increases the likelihood of being heard. This also prevents you from assuming the way you communicate with one group is appropriate or right for all groups or people.

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If you are unsure how to determine the styles of the groups or persons with whom you are interacting, you can always ask them:

“How do you prefer to receive information?”

This approach requires listening, both to what the individuals say as well as what is unspoken. Virgin Group CEO Richard Branson noted that the best communicators are also great listeners.

To communicate effectively from relationship to relationship and situation to situation, you must understand the communication needs of others.

3. Exercise Precision and Care

A recent engagement underscored for me the importance of exercising care when communicating.

On a recent trip to Ohio, I decided to meet up with an old friend to go for a walk. As we strolled through the soccer park, my friend gently announced that he had something to talk about, he was upset with me. His introduction to the problem allowed me to mentally shift gears and prepare for the conversation.

Shortly after introducing the shift in conversation, my friend asked me why I didn’t invite him to the launch party for my business. He lives in Ohio and I live in the D.C. area.

I explained that the event snuck up on me, and I only started planning the invite list three weeks before the event. Due to the last-minute nature of the gathering, I opted to invite people in the DMV area versus my friends from outside the area – I didn’t want to be disrespectful by asking them to travel on such short notice.

I also noted that I didn’t want to be disappointed if he and others declined to come to the event. So I played it safe in terms of inviting people who were local.

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In the moment, I felt the conversation went very well. I also checked in with my friend a few days after our walk, affirmed my appreciation for his willingness to communicate his upset and our ability to work through it.

The way this conversation unfolded exemplified effective communication. My friend approached me with grace and vulnerability. He approached me with a level of curiosity that didn’t put me on my heels — I was able to really listen to what he was saying, apologize for how my decision impacted him and vow that going forward, I would always ask rather than making decisions for him and others.

Our relationship is intact, and I now have information that will help me become a better friend to him and others.

4. Be Mindful of Delivery, Timing and Messenger

Communicating effectively also requires thinking through the delivery of the message one intends to communicate as well as the appropriate time for the discussion.

In an Entrepreneur.com column, VIP Contributor Deep Patel, noted that persons interested in communicating well need to master the art of timing. Patel noted,[1]

“Great comedians, like all great communicators, are able to feel out their audience to determine when to move on to a new topic or when to reiterate an idea.”

Communicating effectively also requires thoughtfulness about the messenger. A person prone to dramatic, angry outbursts should never be called upon to deliver constructive feedback, especially to people whom they do not know. The immediate aftermath of a mass shooting is not the ideal time to talk about the importance of the Second Amendment rights.

Like everyone else, I must work to ensure my communication is layered with precision and care.

It requires precision because words must be carefully tailored to the person with whom you are speaking.

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It requires intentionality because before one communicates, one should think about the audience and what the audience needs in order to hear your message the way you intended it to be communicated.

It requires active listening which is about hearing verbal and nonverbal messages.

Even though we may be right in what we say, how we say it could derail the impact of the message and the other parties’ ability to hear the message.

Communicating with care is also about saying things that the people in our life need to hear and doing so with love.

The Bottom Line

When I left the meeting with my dear friend, I wondered if I was replicating or modeling this level of openness and transparency in the rest of my relationships.

I was intrigued and appreciative. He’d clearly thought about what he wanted to say to me, picked the appropriate time to share his feedback and then delivered it with care. He hit the ball out of the park and I’m hopeful we all do the same.

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Featured photo credit: Kenan Buhic via unsplash.com

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