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7 Struggles Only People With Concealed Depression Can Understand

7 Struggles Only People With Concealed Depression Can Understand

It is a hard thing to hide depression. Why would someone do this? Well, for a number of reasons: to make themselves seem normal and strong as opposed to weak and fragile. People that conceal their depression deal with many struggles that many of us can’t understand. Let us look at the struggles these individuals have to go through. My heart goes to each and every one of them.

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    1. They make efforts to appear normal.

    It is fairly normal for people who conceal their depression to appear as happy as everyone else that is around them. I personally feel this to be the hardest and most difficult of the struggles that are listed. When you feel down in the dumps, and you have to show or represent yourself as being “happy,” it takes a lot away from you.

    This is a truly sad situation. Having been through all this myself, I can assure you — it isn’t easy at all.

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    2. Being alone is terrifying.

    People with hidden depression know that they like to be alone sometimes. But at other times, it is useful to be with someone. When the depressed become alienated, it is also extremely nerve-wracking because it is so difficult to adjust from being alone to being with someone (and vice versa).

    It is complicated, but I have gone through it and I know that this truly does happen.

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      3. They have the worst types of eating/sleeping habits.

      People who conceal depression are either sleeping way too much or sleeping too little. It is a nuisance that they have to deal with. Sometimes, they don’t get any sleep at all. It is a whole roller coaster ride having to deal with the depths of depression.

      When I went through depression, I sometimes found it very difficult to get sleep and other days I would just sleep the entire day.

      4. They know about life and death very well and closely.

      People who hide their depression know that they go through death each single day. They deal with it on a daily basis and so they have a nice view of what life is all about. They know that things should never be taken for granted.

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        5. They look for a purpose in life.

        People who conceal their depression yet again look for a purpose to life. They search for something that fuels their passion to an extent. Searching for their calling is something that comes naturally to them. They love to look at the depth in life…and everything in it.

        6. They also try to discover love in small ways.

        Just because someone tries to hide their depression doesn’t mean that they aren’t looking for love. As a matter of fact, because they aren’t feeling up to the mark, they find love in small places and small ways. They may feel away from love so they try to grasp it when possible. So, if you love someone who tries to hide their depression, know that they may be some of the most beautiful and strongest people out there.

        7. They have outbursts of crying at times when things get too much.

        When they can’t handle the pressure, these people like to cry it out. Many times it is hard to understand why they are feeling a certain way, so the best thing to do is just let it all out. Know that it is all right if they do so. In the end, crying helps  them feel better. It helps achieve a state of accepting their emotions on a human level, and that is okay to not try and be perfect all the time.

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          Ramanpreet Kaur

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          Last Updated on December 3, 2019

          10 Life Lessons You’d Better Learn Early on in Life

          10 Life Lessons You’d Better Learn Early on in Life

          There are so many lessons I wish I had learned while I was young enough to appreciate and apply them. The thing with wisdom, and often with life lessons in general, is that they’re learned in retrospect, long after we needed them. The good news is that other people can benefit from our experiences and the lessons we’ve learned.

          Here’re 10 important life lessons you should learn early on:

          1. Money Will Never Solve Your Real Problems

          Money is a tool; a commodity that buys you necessities and some nice “wants,” but it is not the panacea to your problems.

          There are a great many people who are living on very little, yet have wonderfully full and happy lives… and there are sadly a great many people are living on quite a lot, yet have terribly miserable lives.

          Money can buy a nice home, a great car, fabulous shoes, even a bit of security and some creature comforts, but it cannot fix a broken relationship, or cure loneliness, and the “happiness” it brings is only fleeting and not the kind that really and truly matters. Happiness is not for sale. If you’re expecting the “stuff” you can buy to “make it better,” you will never be happy.

          2. Pace Yourself

          Often when we’re young, just beginning our adult journey we feel as though we have to do everything at once. We need to decide everything, plan out our lives, experience everything, get to the top, find true love, figure out our life’s purpose, and do it all at the same time.

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          Slow down—don’t rush into things. Let your life unfold. Wait a bit to see where it takes you, and take time to weigh your options. Enjoy every bite of food, take time to look around you, let the other person finish their side of the conversation. Allow yourself time to think, to mull a bit.

          Taking action is critical. Working towards your goals and making plans for the future is commendable and often very useful, but rushing full-speed ahead towards anything is a one-way ticket to burnout and a good way to miss your life as it passes you by.

          3. You Can’t Please Everyone

          “I don’t know the secret to success, but the secret to failure is trying to please everyone” – Bill Cosby.

          You don’t need everyone to agree with you or even like you. It’s human nature to want to belong, to be liked, respected and valued, but not at the expense of your integrity and happiness. Other people cannot give you the validation you seek. That has to come from inside.

          Speak up, stick to your guns, assert yourself when you need to, demand respect, stay true to your values.

          4. Your Health Is Your Most Valuable Asset

          Health is an invaluable treasure—always appreciate, nurture, and protect it. Good health is often wasted on the young before they have a chance to appreciate it for what it’s worth.

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          We tend to take our good health for granted, because it’s just there. We don’t have to worry about it, so we don’t really pay attention to it… until we have to.

          Heart disease, bone density, stroke, many cancers—the list of many largely preventable diseases is long, so take care of your health now, or you’ll regret it later on.

          5. You Don’t Always Get What You Want

          “Life is what happens while you’re busy making other plans.” – John Lennon

          No matter how carefully you plan and how hard you work, sometimes things just don’t work out the way you want them to… and that’s okay.

          We have all of these expectations; predetermined visions of what our “ideal” life will look like, but all too often, that’s not the reality of the life we end up with. Sometimes our dreams fail and sometimes we just change our minds mid-course. Sometimes we have to flop to find the right course and sometimes we just have to try a few things before we find the right direction.

          6. It’s Not All About You

          You are not the epicenter of the universe. It’s very difficult to view the world from a perspective outside of your own, since we are always so focused on what’s happening in our own lives. What do I have to do today? What will this mean for me, for my career, for my life? What do I want?

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          It’s normal to be intensely aware of everything that’s going on in your own life, but you need to pay as much attention to what’s happening around you, and how things affect other people in the world as you do to your own life. It helps to keep things in perspective.

          7. There’s No Shame in Not Knowing

          No one has it all figured out. Nobody has all the answers. There’s no shame in saying “I don’t know.” Pretending to be perfect doesn’t make you perfect. It just makes you neurotic to keep up the pretense of manufactured perfection.

          We have this idea that there is some kind of stigma or shame in admitting our limitations or uncertainly, but we can’t possibly know everything. We all make mistakes and mess up occasionally. We learn as we go, that’s life.

          Besides—nobody likes a know-it-all. A little vulnerability makes you human and oh so much more relatable.

          8. Love Is More Than a Feeling; It’s a Choice

          That burst of initial exhilaration, pulse quickening love and passion does not last long. But that doesn’t mean long-lasting love is not possible.

          Love is not just a feeling; it’s a choice that you make every day. We have to choose to let annoyances pass, to forgive, to be kind, to respect, to support, to be faithful.

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          Relationships take work. Sometimes it’s easy and sometimes it’s incredibly hard. It is up to us to choose how we want to act, think and speak in a relationship.

          9. Perspective Is a Beautiful Thing

          Typically, when we’re worried or upset, it’s because we’ve lost perspective. Everything that is happening in our lives seems so big, so important, so do or die, but in the grand picture, this single hiccup often means next to nothing.

          The fight we’re having, the job we didn’t get, the real or imagined slight, the unexpected need to shift course, the thing we wanted, but didn’t get. Most of it won’t matter 20, 30, 40 years from now. It’s hard to see long term when all you know is short term, but unless it’s life-threatening, let it go, and move on.

          10. Don’t Take Anything for Granted

          We often don’t appreciate what we have until it’s gone: that includes your health, your family and friends, your job, the money you have or think you will have tomorrow.

          When you’re young, it seems that your parents will always be there, but they won’t. You think you have plenty of time to get back in touch with your old friends or spend time with new ones, but you don’t. You have the money to spend, or you think you’ll have it next month, but you might not.

          Nothing in your life is not guaranteed to be there tomorrow, including those you love.

          This is a hard life lesson to learn, but it may be the most important of all: Life can change in an instant. Make sure you appreciate what you have, while you still have it.

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          Featured photo credit: Ben Eaton via unsplash.com

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