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10 Personal Qualities You Should Learn From The #Bossy Tina Fey

10 Personal Qualities You Should Learn From The #Bossy Tina Fey

It’s hard to imagine a time before the bossy queen of comedy gave us sage advice in a neatly wrapped package of comedy and satire. Tina Fey has taught us countless lessons about what it means to achieve success, enjoy life, and be a better person — all while making us laugh until we pee. Without further ado, here are the top 10 qualities Tina Fey has inspired in us during her reign.

1. Clear Communication

“Make statements, with your actions and your voice.”

You can talk all day long, but other people will understand you more clearly if you project with both behavior and speech. You must remain consistent with your words and your conduct to set a good example for your peers to comprehend.

2. Strong Self-Confidence

“Believe you are worthy of the cover.”

Every woman struggles with physical, mental, and emotional insecurities — even Tina Fey. However, the lady of perpetual inspiration preaches that self-confidence (even in the form of delusion) is the best way to make your dreams come true. After all, you are going to have a tough time convincing other people to put you on the cover if you yourself don’t think you can get there.

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3. Unshakeable Lady Pride

“People are going to try to trick you. Don’t be fooled. You’re not in competition with other women. You’re in competition with everyone.”

Tina Fey is a member of feminism’s old guard; she has been fighting for women’s legal and societal equality since before many of us understood the terms “heteronormativity” and “rape culture.” As a result, Fey knows too well the struggles women enforce on fellow women — and she knows that we need to work together to end it.

4. Altruistic Cooperation

“Cover the phones for someone when they need to pee. Punch someone’s timecard. Help people when the register doesn’t add up. Don’t be a tattletale.”

There are plenty of reasons to help out your friends and co-workers: For one, they will owe you favors in the future; for another, cooperation makes life easier for everyone. However, acts of kindness don’t necessarily need a reason. You should do good in the world just for the sake of doing good.

5. Balanced Beauty

“If you retain nothing else, always remember this important Rule of Beauty. ‘Who cares?’”

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It is hard to deny that appearance is important. Researchers have discovered that looking a certain way can affect a person’s ability to get good grades, secure interviews, earn a high salary, and more. However, Tina Fey reminds us that we shouldn’t devote all our attention to looking good.

liz

    Liz Lemon image by jtbrennan from Flickr.

    6. Passionate Imperative

    “As the mother of this now five-year-old show, would I still rather have a strong ‘Two and a Half Men’ than our sickly little program? No, I would not, because I love my weird little show.”

    “30 Rock” was on the verge of cancellation for most of its time on air, but that never stopped Tina Fey from rewriting the scripts to make them more appealing to the masses. Fey remained committed to the show that she was passionate about — and in the end, she earned two Emmys (and 103 Emmy nominations) for her efforts. If you have a crazy dream of running your own business, you should absolutely go for it.

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    7. Assertive Self-Direction

    “When people say ‘You really, really must’ do something, it means that you don’t really have to.”

    If there is one thing you have absolute control over, it is what you do and say — and you can never let someone else take that away from you. No matter what other people demand, you should only do what you think is right.

    8. Insightful Judgement

    “You can always tell how smart a person is by what they laugh at.”

    Perceptiveness is perhaps one of the most unendingly useful skills you can foster. Tina Fey uses her comedy to understand what other people like and need, and you can do the same with your inherent talents to gain an edge in business and in life.

    9. Informed Inspiration

    “I pretty much just do whatever Oprah tells me to.”

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    Tina Fey loves Oprah unabashedly, and considering Oprah’s unparalleled professional success, we can see why. Perhaps she is following in Oprah’s footsteps — the way you should follow in Tina Fey’s.

    10. Indulgent Relaxation

    “One of my New Year’s Resolutions is to say ‘Yes.’ Yes to love; yes to life; yes to staying in more!”

    Tina Fey works hard, and you probably do, too. While you should open yourself up to new experiences, you should also know when it is time to put on pajamas, eat some cheese, and watch television until you fall asleep.

    Featured photo credit: Wikimedia.org via upload.wikimedia.org

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    Last Updated on February 21, 2019

    The Secret to Effective Conflict Resolution: The IBR Approach

    The Secret to Effective Conflict Resolution: The IBR Approach

    In business, in social relationships, in family… In whatever context conflict is always inevitable, especially when you are in the leader role. This role equals “make decisions for the best of majority” and the remaining are not amused. Conflicts arise.

    Conflicts arise when we want to push for a better quality work but some members want to take a break from work.

    Conflicts arise when we as citizens want more recreational facilities but the Government has to balance the needs to maintain tourism growth.

    Conflicts are literally everywhere.

    Avoiding Conflicts a No-No and Resolving Conflicts a Win-Win

    Avoiding conflicts seem to be a viable option for us. The cruel fact is, it isn’t. Conflicts won’t walk away by themselves. They will, instead, escalate and haunt you back even more when we finally realize that’s no way we can let it be.

    Moreover, avoiding conflicts will eventually intensify the misunderstanding among the involved parties. And the misunderstanding severely hinders open communication which later on the parties tend to keep things secret. This is obviously detrimental to teamwork.

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    Some may view conflicts as the last step before arguments. And they thus leave it aside as if they never happen. This is not true.

    Conflicts are the intersect point between different individuals with different opinions. And this does not necessarily lead to argument.

    Instead, proper handling of conflicts can actually result in a win-win situation – both parties are pleased and allies are gained. A better understanding between each other and future conflicts are less likely to happen.

    The IBR Approach to Resolve Conflicts

    Here, we introduce to you an effective approach to resolve conflicts – the Interest-Based Relational (IBR) approach. The IBR approach was developed by Roger Fisher and William Ury in their 1981 book Getting to Yes. It stresses the importance of the separation between people and their emotions from the problem. Another focus of the approach is to build mutual understanding and respect as they strengthen bonds among parties and can ultimately help resolve conflicts in a harmonious way. The approach suggests a 6-step procedure for conflict resolution:

    Step 1: Prioritize Good Relationships

    How? Before addressing the problem or even starting the discussion, make it clear the conflict can result in a mutual trouble and through subsequent respectful negotiation the conflict can be resolved peacefully. And that brings the best outcome to the whole team by working together.

    Why? It is easy to overlook own cause of the conflict and point the finger to the members with different opinions. With such a mindset, it is likely to blame rather than to listen to the others and fail to acknowledge the problem completely. Such a discussion manner will undermine the good relationships among the members and aggravate the problem.

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    Example: Before discussion, stress that the problem is never one’s complete fault. Everyone is responsible for it. Then, it is important to point out our own involvement in the problem and state clearly we are here to listen to everyone’s opinions rather than accusing others.

    Step 2: People Are NOT the Cause of Problem

    How? State clearly the problem is never one-sided. Collaborative effort is needed. More importantly, note the problem should not be taken personally. We are not making accusations on persons but addressing the problem itself.

    Why? Once things taken personally, everything will go out of control. People will become irrational and neglect others’ opinions. We are then unable to address the problem properly because we cannot grasp a fuller and clearer picture of the problem due to presumption.

    Example: In spite of the confronting opinions, we have to emphasize that the problem is not a result of the persons but probably the different perspectives to view it. So, if we try to look at the problem from the other’s perspective, we may understand why there are varied opinions.

    Step 3: Listen From ALL Stances

    How? Do NOT blame others. It is of utmost importance. Ask for everyone’s opinions. It is important to let everyone feel that they contribute to the discussion. Tell them their involvement is essential to solve the problem and their effort is very much appreciated.

    Why? None wants to be ignored. If one feels neglected, it is very likely for he/she to be aggressive. It is definitely not what we hope to see in a discussion. Acknowledging and being acknowledged are equally important. So, make sure everyone has equal opportunity to express their views. Also, realizing their opinions are not neglected, they will be more receptive to other opinions.

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    Example: A little trick can played here: Invite others to talk first. It is an easy way to let others feel involved and ,more importantly, know their voices are heard. Also, we can show that we are actively listening to them by giving direct eye-contact and nodding. One important to note is that never interrupt anyone. Always let them finish first beforeanother one begins.

    Step 4: Listen Comes First, Talk Follows

    How? Ensure everyone has listened to one another points of view. It can be done by taking turn to speak and leaving the discussion part at last. State once again the problem is nothing personal and no accusation should be made.

    Why? By turn-taking, everyone can finish talking and voices of all sides can be heard indiscriminantly. This can promote willingness to listen to opposing opinions.

    Example: We can prepare pieces of paper with different numbers written on them. Then, ask different members to pick one and talk according to the sequence of the number. After everyone’s finished, advise everyone to use “I” more than “You” in the discussion period to avoid others thinking that it is an accusation.

    Step 5: Understand the Facts, Then Address the Problem

    How? List out ALL the facts first. Ask everyone to tell what they know about the problems.

    Why? Sometimes your facts are unknown to the others while they may know something we don’t. Missing out on these facts could possibly lead to inaccurate capture of the problem. Also, different known facts can lead to different perception of the matter. It also helps everyone better understand the problem and can eventually help reach a solution.

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    Example: While everyone is expressing their own views, ask them to write down everything they know that is true to the problem. As soon as everyone has finished, all facts can be noted and everyone’s understanding of the problem is raised.

    Step 6: Solve the Problem Together

    How? Knowing what everyone’s thinking, it is now time to resolve the conflict. Up to this point, everyone should have understood the problem better. So, it is everyone’s time to suggest some solutions. It is important not to have one giving all the solutions.

    Why? Having everyone suggesting their solutions is important as they will not feel excluded and their opinions are considered. Besides, it may also generate more solutions that can better resolve the conflicts. Everyone will more likely be satisfied with the result.

    Example: After discussion, ask all members to suggest any possible solutions and stress that all solutions are welcomed. State clearly that we are looking for the best outcomes for everyone’s sake rather than battling to win over one another. Then, evaluate all the solutions and pick the one that is in favor of everyone.

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