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5 Things Being A Former Emo Kid Taught You

5 Things Being A Former Emo Kid Taught You

Now in your twenties you may look back on your teenage years and cringe, but that time spent as an emo or scene kid has undoubtedly shaped your life. As an adult we now recognize the alternative emo trend we once followed like a religion, was an invaluable experience.

Here’s our top 5 things that being a former emo kid has taught us:

1. Things aren’t that bad… or are they?

If much of your emo life was spent feeling depressed, maybe it was for a good reason. Life as an adult was ahead, and life as an adult can suck! Paying rent or a mortgage, bills, along with long working weeks, and not having time to hang out in large groups in parks are enough to get anybody down!

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That said, maybe it’s not all bad – think of the hours wasted moping around; your post-emo life is surely productive in comparison. You now achieve something everyday – not just perfectly applying black nail varnish; and your life has direction.

Emo night out halloween

    2. Halloween is the only acceptable day to dress emo

     Each year you count down the days to Halloween, looking forward to dressing the way you used to. Halloween is basically Emo throwback day, the only acceptable day to dress emo or goth as an adult. Make the most of this and go all out each year!

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    Use Halloween as a photo op too! Step aside, ‘Selfies’, and hark back to your MySpace days with pictures that are all about the angles! Reminisce back to a time where a sweeping fringe hides half of your face – and eyeliner hides the other half – this was once an everyday thing.

    3. Band tees rock, and it is okay to wear Chuck Tailors Converse…

    …Just maybe not to work. Depending on you career choice, work attire may be quite relaxed. Studies show that work-wear rules and regulations have softened over the years.

    As an emo you used to personalize your clothing to look unique and to express yourself, and so, even today you probably still look for ways to add that special something to your favorite outfit to stand out, or look for pieces of clothing not usually found in mainstream stores. Just bear in mind that whatever your job you may need to tone it down a little. Keep the casual for the weekend, and guys: no painted fingernails. (Oh, and ditch the guyliner too, leave that one to Jimmy Carr!)

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    4. Read books 

    Years spent as a scene kid has made you open to change, and you realize that trends change over time, but that doesn’t mean you’ve changed your beliefs, your interests or favorite music. Those hours spent tucked away in your room reading taught you a lot. So swap those emo novels and books about self-exploration and feelings for classic reads.

    Reading improves your outlook on life, and can in fact help with depression (and coping with adult life – see number 1). William Nicholson once said, “We read to know that we are not alone”. It can help you connect with the world, feel less depressed or isolated, and feel better about life. Further benefits of reading books include gaining knowledge and expanding your vocabulary. Reading can improve your writing skills too.

    5. Music alters mood… 

    …Sometimes for the better, sometimes for the worse. Emo music is stereo-typically melodramatic guitar-based rock music. It can either be aggressive and ‘shouty’ or it can acoustic and gentle. Chances are it contains confessional or explicitly personal lyrics, often about heartbreak or loneliness. Ditch these depressing sounds, but don’t write off rock just yet. Explore the genre and find a new sound.

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    Chances are you have an open mind when it comes to music. As an emo kid you didn’t listen to mainstream music. This has likely led you to discover a much broader range of music than other people since then. Time may change but your interests shouldn’t – gigs are great, so keep going to shows and remember: it is ok to enjoy the music and move around!

    Featured photo credit: Restless Globe Trotter via flickr.com

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    Last Updated on January 21, 2020

    The Best Way to Create a Vision for the Life You Want

    The Best Way to Create a Vision for the Life You Want

    Creating a vision for your life might seem like a frivolous, fantastical waste of time, but it’s not: creating a compelling vision of the life you want is actually one of the most effective strategies for achieving the life of your dreams. Perhaps the best way to look at the concept of a life vision is as a compass to help guide you to take the best actions and make the right choices that help propel you toward your best life.

    your vision of where or who you want to be is the greatest asset you have

      Why You Need a Vision

      Experts and life success stories support the idea that with a vision in mind, you are more likely to succeed far beyond what you could otherwise achieve without a clear vision. Think of crafting your life vision as mapping a path to your personal and professional dreams. Life satisfaction and personal happiness are within reach. The harsh reality is that if you don’t develop your own vision, you’ll allow other people and circumstances to direct the course of your life.

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      How to Create Your Life Vision

      Don’t expect a clear and well-defined vision overnight—envisioning your life and determining the course you will follow requires time, and reflection. You need to cultivate vision and perspective, and you also need to apply logic and planning for the practical application of your vision. Your best vision blossoms from your dreams, hopes, and aspirations. It will resonate with your values and ideals, and will generate energy and enthusiasm to help strengthen your commitment to explore the possibilities of your life.

      What Do You Want?

      The question sounds deceptively simple, but it’s often the most difficult to answer. Allowing yourself to explore your deepest desires can be very frightening. You may also not think you have the time to consider something as fanciful as what you want out of life, but it’s important to remind yourself that a life of fulfillment does not usually happen by chance, but by design.

      It’s helpful to ask some thought-provoking questions to help you discover the possibilities of what you want out of life. Consider every aspect of your life, personal and professional, tangible and intangible. Contemplate all the important areas, family and friends, career and success, health and quality of life, spiritual connection and personal growth, and don’t forget about fun and enjoyment.

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      Some tips to guide you:

      • Remember to ask why you want certain things
      • Think about what you want, not on what you don’t want.
      • Give yourself permission to dream.
      • Be creative. Consider ideas that you never thought possible.
      • Focus on your wishes, not what others expect of you.

      Some questions to start your exploration:

      • What really matters to you in life? Not what should matter, what does matter.
      • What would you like to have more of in your life?
      • Set aside money for a moment; what do you want in your career?
      • What are your secret passions and dreams?
      • What would bring more joy and happiness into your life?
      • What do you want your relationships to be like?
      • What qualities would you like to develop?
      • What are your values? What issues do you care about?
      • What are your talents? What’s special about you?
      • What would you most like to accomplish?
      • What would legacy would you like to leave behind?

      It may be helpful to write your thoughts down in a journal or creative vision board if you’re the creative type. Add your own questions, and ask others what they want out of life. Relax and make this exercise fun. You may want to set your answers aside for a while and come back to them later to see if any have changed or if you have anything to add.

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      What Would Your Best Life Look Like?

      Describe your ideal life in detail. Allow yourself to dream and imagine, and create a vivid picture. If you can’t visualize a picture, focus on how your best life would feel. If you find it difficult to envision your life 20 or 30 years from now, start with five years—even a few years into the future will give you a place to start. What you see may surprise you. Set aside preconceived notions. This is your chance to dream and fantasize.

      A few prompts to get you started:

      • What will you have accomplished already?
      • How will you feel about yourself?
      • What kind of people are in your life? How do you feel about them?
      • What does your ideal day look like?
      • Where are you? Where do you live? Think specifics, what city, state, or country, type of community, house or an apartment, style and atmosphere.
      • What would you be doing?
      • Are you with another person, a group of people, or are you by yourself?
      • How are you dressed?
      • What’s your state of mind? Happy or sad? Contented or frustrated?
      • What does your physical body look like? How do you feel about that?
      • Does your best life make you smile and make your heart sing? If it doesn’t, dig deeper, dream bigger.

      It’s important to focus on the result, or at least a way-point in your life. Don’t think about the process for getting there yet—that’s the next stepGive yourself permission to revisit this vision every day, even if only for a few minutes. Keep your vision alive and in the front of your mind.

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      Plan Backwards

      It may sound counter-intuitive to plan backwards rather than forwards, but when you’re planning your life from the end result, it’s often more useful to consider the last step and work your way back to the first. This is actually a valuable and practical strategy for making your vision a reality.

      • What’s the last thing that would’ve had to happen to achieve your best life?
      • What’s the most important choice you would’ve had to make?
      • What would you have needed to learn along the way?
      • What important actions would you have had to take?
      • What beliefs would you have needed to change?
      • What habits or behaviors would you have had to cultivate?
      • What type of support would you have had to enlist?
      • How long will it have taken you to realize your best life?
      • What steps or milestones would you have needed to reach along the way?

      Now it’s time to think about your first step, and the next step after that. Ponder the gap between where you are now and where you want to be in the future. It may seem impossible, but it’s quite achievable if you take it step-by-step.

      It’s important to revisit this vision from time to time. Don’t be surprised if your answers to the questions, your technicolor vision, and the resulting plans change. That can actually be a very good thing; as you change in unforeseeable ways, the best life you envision will change as well. For now, it’s important to use the process, create your vision, and take the first step towards making that vision a reality.

      Featured photo credit: Matt Noble via unsplash.com

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