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5 Unrealistic Expectations Men Have Of Women

5 Unrealistic Expectations Men Have Of Women

Western society is finally getting around to valuing men and women equally. While men widely hold positions of power, it is often thought that women would adopt a less-risk focused, more nurturing approach to leadership. Hell, ask the government of Iceland how they value women. In response to the financial crisis, the existing government of men was voted out and the party that was composed of women was voted in.

When it comes to every day perceptions, men often create bizarrely unreal expectations of women, both of their physicality and of their emotions. For that reason, we have compiled a list of ways that men regularly and consistently put unrealistic expectations on women.

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1. They want women to be kind and caring people – all the time.

One of the recent trends in feminism is to fight against the “smile” admonitions men give women. In it, women are fighting the unrealistic expectation that they have to portray an image of kindness at all times. This is not necessarily true. If men are entitled to fight and curse and generally indulge in their testosterone and anger, then women are also entitled to act whichever way they want. While women may be more predisposed to kindness, nothing gives men the right to try and control the emotions of strangers.

2. They enforce entirely unrealistic expectations of the female body.

Listen, I’m a guy, and I like the female figure as much as the next heterosexual guy; however, I’ve had to teach myself to realize that a woman’s body experiences the same turmoils as any one else’s. Sometimes they fart. Sometimes there’s excess hair. Sometimes a few things jiggle that previously did not jiggle. Whether it’s because of mass media or whatever else, men and society at large have been conditioned to think that women who experience these normal human issues are not good enough. The fact is that’s just not true.

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3. They let women care for them when they cannot even care for themselves.

Most guys are slobs – plain and simple. However, where most guys lack in the cleanliness department, they often make up in the “let-my-girlfriend/wife/female best friend/Tinder date take-care-of-it” department. This unrealistic expectation concerns how women are not only asked to be clean and tidy themselves, but to also make up for their more slovenly counterparts by taking on more of the housework. This does not make sense. If we didn’t place undue burden on females to clean, in addition to work, and have fun, we might just find real equality in our lifetimes.

4. They let women make the decisions, only reacting after the fact.

Many men in long-term relationships eventually stop trying to please women, instead allowing her to go through all of the various options, only to jump on board later. This is another unrealistic expectation men have of women. Men expect women to make the plans, set everything up, and then we expect to just get in the car and drive, hoping that this act of assertiveness will make her happy. Go out of your way to plan something for her. It will be worth it.

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5. They hardly let women have downtime or other hobbies.

As a guy, I watch an unfair amount of sports. Yesterday, I watched baseball, today I am watching hockey, Sunday I might watch football. As a society, we see this a socially acceptable in some way. However, once a woman starts getting obsessed with certain TV shows or other activities, her decisions are thought of as questionable. If I can talk about the Chicago Cubs baseball lineup all day, then she should be able to talk about Project Runway. At the moment, it doesn’t seem like that’s properly balanced.

Featured photo credit: Window Shopping/Jim Smith via flickr.com

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Last Updated on January 21, 2020

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

If I was a super hero I’d want my super power to be the ability to motivate everyone around me. Think of how many problems you could solve just by being able to motivate people towards their goals. You wouldn’t be frustrated by lazy co-workers. You wouldn’t be mad at your partner for wasting the weekend in front of the TV. Also, the more people around you are motivated toward their dreams, the more you can capitalize off their successes.

Being able to motivate people is key to your success at work, at home, and in the future because no one can achieve anything alone. We all need the help of others.

So, how to motivate people? Here are 7 ways to motivate others even you can do.

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1. Listen

Most people start out trying to motivate someone by giving them a lengthy speech, but this rarely works because motivation has to start inside others. The best way to motivate others is to start by listening to what they want to do. Find out what the person’s goals and dreams are. If it’s something you want to encourage, then continue through these steps.

2. Ask Open-Ended Questions

Open-ended questions are the best way to figure out what someone’s dreams are. If you can’t think of anything to ask, start with, “What have you always wanted to do?”

“Why do you want to do that?”

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“What makes you so excited about it?”

“How long has that been your dream?”

You need this information the help you with the following steps.

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3. Encourage

This is the most important step, because starting a dream is scary. People are so scared they will fail or look stupid, many never try to reach their goals, so this is where you come in. You must encourage them. Say things like, “I think you will be great at that.” Better yet, say, “I think your skills in X will help you succeed.” For example if you have a friend who wants to own a pet store, say, “You are so great with animals, I think you will be excellent at running a pet store.”

4. Ask About What the First Step Will Be

After you’ve encouraged them, find how they will start. If they don’t know, you can make suggestions, but it’s better to let the person figure out the first step themselves so they can be committed to the process.

5. Dream

This is the most fun step, because you can dream about success. Say things like, “Wouldn’t it be cool if your business took off, and you didn’t have to work at that job you hate?” By allowing others to dream, you solidify the motivation in place and connect their dreams to a future reality.

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6. Ask How You Can Help

Most of the time, others won’t need anything from you, but it’s always good to offer. Just letting the person know you’re there will help motivate them to start. And, who knows, maybe your skills can help.

7. Follow Up

Periodically, over the course of the next year, ask them how their goal is going. This way you can find out what progress has been made. You may need to do the seven steps again, or they may need motivation in another area of their life.

Final Thoughts

By following these seven steps, you’ll be able to encourage the people around you to achieve their dreams and goals. In return, you’ll be more passionate about getting to your goals, you’ll be surrounded by successful people, and others will want to help you reach your dreams …

Oh, and you’ll become a motivational super hero. Time to get a cape!

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Featured photo credit: Thought Catalog via unsplash.com

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