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5 Unrealistic Expectations Men Have Of Women

5 Unrealistic Expectations Men Have Of Women

Western society is finally getting around to valuing men and women equally. While men widely hold positions of power, it is often thought that women would adopt a less-risk focused, more nurturing approach to leadership. Hell, ask the government of Iceland how they value women. In response to the financial crisis, the existing government of men was voted out and the party that was composed of women was voted in.

When it comes to every day perceptions, men often create bizarrely unreal expectations of women, both of their physicality and of their emotions. For that reason, we have compiled a list of ways that men regularly and consistently put unrealistic expectations on women.

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1. They want women to be kind and caring people – all the time.

One of the recent trends in feminism is to fight against the “smile” admonitions men give women. In it, women are fighting the unrealistic expectation that they have to portray an image of kindness at all times. This is not necessarily true. If men are entitled to fight and curse and generally indulge in their testosterone and anger, then women are also entitled to act whichever way they want. While women may be more predisposed to kindness, nothing gives men the right to try and control the emotions of strangers.

2. They enforce entirely unrealistic expectations of the female body.

Listen, I’m a guy, and I like the female figure as much as the next heterosexual guy; however, I’ve had to teach myself to realize that a woman’s body experiences the same turmoils as any one else’s. Sometimes they fart. Sometimes there’s excess hair. Sometimes a few things jiggle that previously did not jiggle. Whether it’s because of mass media or whatever else, men and society at large have been conditioned to think that women who experience these normal human issues are not good enough. The fact is that’s just not true.

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3. They let women care for them when they cannot even care for themselves.

Most guys are slobs – plain and simple. However, where most guys lack in the cleanliness department, they often make up in the “let-my-girlfriend/wife/female best friend/Tinder date take-care-of-it” department. This unrealistic expectation concerns how women are not only asked to be clean and tidy themselves, but to also make up for their more slovenly counterparts by taking on more of the housework. This does not make sense. If we didn’t place undue burden on females to clean, in addition to work, and have fun, we might just find real equality in our lifetimes.

4. They let women make the decisions, only reacting after the fact.

Many men in long-term relationships eventually stop trying to please women, instead allowing her to go through all of the various options, only to jump on board later. This is another unrealistic expectation men have of women. Men expect women to make the plans, set everything up, and then we expect to just get in the car and drive, hoping that this act of assertiveness will make her happy. Go out of your way to plan something for her. It will be worth it.

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5. They hardly let women have downtime or other hobbies.

As a guy, I watch an unfair amount of sports. Yesterday, I watched baseball, today I am watching hockey, Sunday I might watch football. As a society, we see this a socially acceptable in some way. However, once a woman starts getting obsessed with certain TV shows or other activities, her decisions are thought of as questionable. If I can talk about the Chicago Cubs baseball lineup all day, then she should be able to talk about Project Runway. At the moment, it doesn’t seem like that’s properly balanced.

Featured photo credit: Window Shopping/Jim Smith via flickr.com

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Last Updated on March 5, 2021

Science Says People Who Talk To Themselves Are Geniuses

Science Says People Who Talk To Themselves Are Geniuses

I talk a lot to myself. It helps me to keep my concentration on the activity on hand, makes me focus more on my studies, and gives me some pretty brilliant ideas while chattering to myself; more importantly, I produce better works. For example, right now, as I am typing, I am constantly mumbling to myself. Do you talk to yourself? Don’t get embarrassed admitting it because science has discovered that those who talk to themselves are actually geniuses… and not crazy!

Research Background

Psychologist-researcher Gary Lupyan conducted an experiment where 20 volunteers were shown objects, in a supermarket, and were asked to remember them. Half of them were told to repeat the objects, for example, banana, and the other half remained silent. In the end, the result shown that self-directed speech aided people to find the objects faster, by 50 to 100 milliseconds, compared to the silent ones.

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“I’ll often mutter to myself when searching for something in the refrigerator or the supermarket shelves,” said Gary Lupyan.

This personal experience actually made him conduct this experiment. Lupyan, together with another psychologist, Daniel Swigley, came up with the outcomes that those to talk to oneself are geniuses. Here are the reasons:

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It stimulates your memory

When you are talking to yourself, your sensory mechanism gets activated. It gets easier on your memory since you can visualize the word, and you can act accordingly.[1]

It helps stay focused

When you are saying it loud, you stay focused on your task,[2] and it helps you recognise that stuff immediately. Of course, this only helps if you know what the object you are searching looks like. For example, a banana is yellow in colour, and you know how a banana looks like. So when you are saying it loud, your brain immediately pictures the image on your mind. But if you don’t know what banana looks like, then there is no effect of saying it loud.

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It helps you clarify your thoughts

Every one of us tends to have various types of thoughts. Most make sense, while the others don’t. Suppose you are furious at someone and you feel like killing that person. Now for this issue you won’t run to a therapist, will you? No, what you do is lock yourself in a room and mutter to yourself. You are letting go off the anger by talking to yourself, the pros and cons of killing that person, and eventually you calm down. This is a silly thought that you have and are unable to share it with any other person. Psychologist Linda Sapadin said,[3]

“It helps you clarify your thoughts, tend to what’s important and firm up any decisions you are contemplating.”

Featured photo credit: Girl Using Laptop In Hotel Room/Ed Gregory via stokpic.com

Reference

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