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8 Reasons Why Introverts Are Irresistibly Attractive

8 Reasons Why Introverts Are Irresistibly Attractive

Perfection is achieved, not when there is nothing more to add, but when there is nothing more to take away.

– Antoine de Saint-Exupery

When I was growing up, I thought there was something wrong with me.

Throughout my high-school and early college years, I found myself lacking social confidence and struggling to feel comfortable in social situations.

I had an intense fear of conflict. I was a people pleaser, perfectionist, and I always feared approaching big groups. I never rose my hand in class, and I often dealt with a paralyzing over-analysis of even the most simple social situations.

Perhaps worst of all, I couldn’t attract women to save my life.

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I knew I had to discover more about myself, and find out how I could use my own strengths to my advantage.

As I developed my own style that eliminated my fears of talking to new people, I found myself able to express a new-found authenticity. I became comfortable in my own skin and was constantly learning how to improve my social skills, while at the same time using solitude to manage my energy and focus.

Here are just a few of the ideas I have learned that make introverts irresistibly attractive.

They excel at intimate connections

Introverts are very deep people. Whether it’s interactions with others, understanding the meaning of things, or learning skills, introverts want to get to the root of whatever they’re after.

That being said, they don’t often have the energy to pursue deep interactions with a large number of people. Introverts tend towards deeper interactions with a few people, as opposed to shallower interactions with a lot of people. If an introvert is interested in you, they will open their soul to you.

They will listen to you

Introverts are a type that often listen more than they speak. They crave understanding more than being understood. They want to hear others’ opinions and stories to try and piece together who they are.

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Everyone wants to be heard. As attention spans shrink in our technology-centered world, introverts make people feel important when they give them their precious energy and focus in hearing what they have to say.

They are sensitive

Studies show that introverts are physically more sensitive than extroverts.

In a recent study, lemon juice was placed on the tongues of both introverts and extroverts. Introverts were found to have salivated more when subjected to the lemon juice. This study shows that introverts’ brains are more responsive to stimuli, and this greater response means that introverts are more sensitive to external events.

Introverts feel what others feel. This can range from intense feelings of guilt when they feel like they might have upset someone, to strong feelings of happiness and fulfillment when they do something positive for someone else.

They love deep conversation

Introverts would rather talk about values than the weather. They would rather talk about childhood events that shaped someone’s life as opposed to learning what someone had for dinner last night. They love to talk about things they’re passionate about, and once they start, it can be hard to get them to stop.

These kinds of deep conversations can form a strong connection between two people, and make them feel like they’ve known each other for years. Making yourself vulnerable and talking about deep topics is critical for building attraction.

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They use solitude to improve themselves

It’s no surprise that introverts spend more time in solitude than extroverts. During this alone time, they aren’t just staring blankly at a wall.

They’re reading a fiction novel that excites their imagination. They’re reading “how-to” books, studying great characters in movies and TV shows, and listening to music that makes them feel a certain way. Introverts are always looking for more knowledge, more skills, and more ways to improve themselves.

They aren’t easy

One of the greatest assets of an attractive introvert is their mystery. They don’t share everything with everyone, and they like to keep it that way.

They are quiet around some, and loud around others. They keep people guessing, and can make others feel like they have earned their interest. Introverts are at peace with the fact that some people will never understand them. This lack of complete understanding can spark a curiosity that quickly builds into attraction.

They keep it real

Introverts are not usually salesmen. They’re not known for their ability to spin reality into something that sounds better than it is. What you get from an introvert is an authenticity that can be seen as refreshing and attractive.

They are better at delaying gratification

Introverts are less impulsive and spend more time thinking things through. They are more willing to make sacrifices in the short-term to achieve something greater for themselves and others in the long-run.

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Introverts can be insanely attractive. It just might take some time and effort to get them to open up.

As humans we value things that are scarce. Introverts provide this scarcity in an intriguing way that creates meaningful, lasting relationships.

If you’re an introvert, you might often think that you have to have “more” in order to be attractive. You know what’s more, though? Less is more. You don’t necessarily need more stories or funny lines, you just have to learn how to unleash the skills you do have in the most powerful way.

Featured photo credit: unsplash.com via pexels.com

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Nathan Adlam

Professional Boss

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Last Updated on August 15, 2018

When You Start to Enjoy Being Single, These 12 Things Will Happen

When You Start to Enjoy Being Single, These 12 Things Will Happen

Being single can make you weary, especially if you didn't initiate a breakup, it could be easy to get carried away with reminiscing and what-if scenarios. Staying caught up in the past is toxic to your growth, however, and interferes with your ability to move forward. Single life can be self-actualizing and enjoyable, but you need to embrace it first. No matter where you are on your journey in coming to terms with being single, the following 12 fantastic things will happen when you accept it.

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1. You will be more focused.

    Once you start to treasure your new-found freedom, you will realize that taking time for yourself will show you what is most important in your life. Enjoying your single time will make what you want clearer and reveal which areas of your life you should build upon. Additionally, studies show that experiencing something alone results in our brain forming a more clear and longer lasting memory.

    2. You will be more active.

      Studies show that unmarried people are also more fit than their hitched counterparts. Let yourself welcome being single, and use this time to your benefit. You'll be more confident and in control when you do meet someone special.

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      3. You will be more likely to have high goals.

        Being single means you can't settle. In case someone who captures your heart comes along, you need to be at the top of your game. By embracing your time being single, you will be more able to pursue your goals and work towards a more complete, fulfilling future.

        4. You will be more creative.

          Spending time alone is also linked to an increase in creative thinking. Spending more time alone will force you to be a deeper thinker, and could lead you to solutions and projects you wouldn't have thought of otherwise.

          5. Your schedule will be your own.

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            Once you get past feeling lonely and realize how wonderful being single is, you will become aware of one of the best perks – your schedule is now completely your own. No longer do you need to have nights out approved, nor will long days at work get interrupted. Relax into loving your single life because nothing is quite as liberating as deciding every moment of your weekly schedule.

            6. You will likely save money.

              Dating is a great way to wave goodbye to all your hard earned cash. When you're with someone, there's nothing more important than impressing them, including your income. However, when the relationship fizzles, you realize how this tactic doesn't pay off. Not only are we more prone to spending when dating, married couples are more likely to have credit card debt than unmarried singles. So don't get depressed when you're eating cheap meals alone – it's really a form of investing in your future!

              7. You won't need to compromise on entertainment.

                Particularly if your significant other tends to have different tastes than you, being single can be a blessing. As soon as you can appreciate being single, you will realize how freeing it is to always watch exactly what you want. There is no longer any need to skimp on your favorite movies, plays, or TV shows that others don't appreciate.

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                8. You will have more time for your family.

                  Another thing you will realize once you learn to relish being single is you now have much more time for family. Especially when it comes to older relatives, time spent with them truly is precious. Make the most of your single time by reconnecting with family members in your life you may have been neglecting.

                  9. You have more time for your friends.

                    Once you start basking in your single glory, you will also find that you have more time for your friends. Not only will increased free time let you reconnect with friends you may have neglected while being half of a couple, studies also show that married people have much weaker social lives than those who are unmarried.

                    10. You will find new haunts in your city.

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                      Once you start to enjoy your single life again you will also find that you have plenty of time to rediscover your city. Where relationships see us fall into the same habit of favorite spots to drink, eat, or dance, when you're on your own you will naturally start to explore fresh venues again.

                      11. You'll find more interests.

                        Similarly, enjoying your time being single will give you more time to consider new hobbies and interests. Instead of repeating the same go-to dates, you can now freely explore activities that really make you passionate.

                        12. You will be more aware of what you want.

                          Ultimately, taking time to ourselves is an important ingredient in discovering what type of person is our ideal match, or what career we can happily commit to. By delighting in your uninhibited life, you are more able to experiment and thereby find out what works for you and what doesn't. Don't look at being single as a drawback, since learning more about yourself and finding out what makes you tick are crucial in forming balanced, healthy relationships in the future.

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