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8 Reasons Why Introverts Are Irresistibly Attractive

8 Reasons Why Introverts Are Irresistibly Attractive

Perfection is achieved, not when there is nothing more to add, but when there is nothing more to take away.

– Antoine de Saint-Exupery

When I was growing up, I thought there was something wrong with me.

Throughout my high-school and early college years, I found myself lacking social confidence and struggling to feel comfortable in social situations.

I had an intense fear of conflict. I was a people pleaser, perfectionist, and I always feared approaching big groups. I never rose my hand in class, and I often dealt with a paralyzing over-analysis of even the most simple social situations.

Perhaps worst of all, I couldn’t attract women to save my life.

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I knew I had to discover more about myself, and find out how I could use my own strengths to my advantage.

As I developed my own style that eliminated my fears of talking to new people, I found myself able to express a new-found authenticity. I became comfortable in my own skin and was constantly learning how to improve my social skills, while at the same time using solitude to manage my energy and focus.

Here are just a few of the ideas I have learned that make introverts irresistibly attractive.

They excel at intimate connections

Introverts are very deep people. Whether it’s interactions with others, understanding the meaning of things, or learning skills, introverts want to get to the root of whatever they’re after.

That being said, they don’t often have the energy to pursue deep interactions with a large number of people. Introverts tend towards deeper interactions with a few people, as opposed to shallower interactions with a lot of people. If an introvert is interested in you, they will open their soul to you.

They will listen to you

Introverts are a type that often listen more than they speak. They crave understanding more than being understood. They want to hear others’ opinions and stories to try and piece together who they are.

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Everyone wants to be heard. As attention spans shrink in our technology-centered world, introverts make people feel important when they give them their precious energy and focus in hearing what they have to say.

They are sensitive

Studies show that introverts are physically more sensitive than extroverts.

In a recent study, lemon juice was placed on the tongues of both introverts and extroverts. Introverts were found to have salivated more when subjected to the lemon juice. This study shows that introverts’ brains are more responsive to stimuli, and this greater response means that introverts are more sensitive to external events.

Introverts feel what others feel. This can range from intense feelings of guilt when they feel like they might have upset someone, to strong feelings of happiness and fulfillment when they do something positive for someone else.

They love deep conversation

Introverts would rather talk about values than the weather. They would rather talk about childhood events that shaped someone’s life as opposed to learning what someone had for dinner last night. They love to talk about things they’re passionate about, and once they start, it can be hard to get them to stop.

These kinds of deep conversations can form a strong connection between two people, and make them feel like they’ve known each other for years. Making yourself vulnerable and talking about deep topics is critical for building attraction.

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They use solitude to improve themselves

It’s no surprise that introverts spend more time in solitude than extroverts. During this alone time, they aren’t just staring blankly at a wall.

They’re reading a fiction novel that excites their imagination. They’re reading “how-to” books, studying great characters in movies and TV shows, and listening to music that makes them feel a certain way. Introverts are always looking for more knowledge, more skills, and more ways to improve themselves.

They aren’t easy

One of the greatest assets of an attractive introvert is their mystery. They don’t share everything with everyone, and they like to keep it that way.

They are quiet around some, and loud around others. They keep people guessing, and can make others feel like they have earned their interest. Introverts are at peace with the fact that some people will never understand them. This lack of complete understanding can spark a curiosity that quickly builds into attraction.

They keep it real

Introverts are not usually salesmen. They’re not known for their ability to spin reality into something that sounds better than it is. What you get from an introvert is an authenticity that can be seen as refreshing and attractive.

They are better at delaying gratification

Introverts are less impulsive and spend more time thinking things through. They are more willing to make sacrifices in the short-term to achieve something greater for themselves and others in the long-run.

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Introverts can be insanely attractive. It just might take some time and effort to get them to open up.

As humans we value things that are scarce. Introverts provide this scarcity in an intriguing way that creates meaningful, lasting relationships.

If you’re an introvert, you might often think that you have to have “more” in order to be attractive. You know what’s more, though? Less is more. You don’t necessarily need more stories or funny lines, you just have to learn how to unleash the skills you do have in the most powerful way.

Featured photo credit: unsplash.com via pexels.com

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Nathan Adlam

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Last Updated on September 17, 2019

10 Simple Ways To Always Think Positive Thoughts

10 Simple Ways To Always Think Positive Thoughts

Positive thinking can lead to a lot of positive change in your life. Developing an optimistic outlook can be good for both your physical and mental health.

But sometimes, certain situations arise in life that makes it hard to keep a positive outlook. Take steps to make positive thinking become more like your second nature and you’ll reap the biggest benefits.

Here are 10 ways to make thinking positive thoughts easy:

1. Spend Time with Positive People

If you surround yourself with constant complainers, their negativity is likely to rub off on you.

Spend time with positive friends and family members to increase the likelihood that their positive thinking habits will become yours too. It’s hard to be negative when everyone around you is so positive.

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2. Take Responsibility for Your Behavior

When you encounter problems and difficulties in life, don’t play the role of the victim. Acknowledge your role in the situation and take responsibility for your behavior.

Accepting responsibility can help you learn from mistakes and prevent you from blaming others unfairly.

3. Contribute to the Community

One of the best ways to feel good about what you have, is to focus on what you have to give.

Volunteer in some manner and give back to the community. Helping others can give you a new outlook on the world and can assist you with positive thinking.

4. Read Positive and Inspirational Materials

Spend time each day reading something that encourages positive thinking. Read the Bible, spiritual material, or inspirational quotes to help you focus on what’s important to you in life. It can be a great way to start and end your day.

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Some recommendations for you:

5. Recognize and Replace Negative Thoughts

You won’t be successful at positive thinking if you’re still plagued by frequent negative thoughts. Learn to recognize and replace thoughts that are overly negative. Often, thoughts that include words like “always” and “never” signal that they aren’t true.

If you find yourself thinking something such as, “I always mess everything up,” replace it with something more realistic such as, “Sometimes I make mistakes but I learn from them.”

There’s no need to make your thoughts unrealistically positive, but instead, make them more realistic.

6. Establish and Work Toward Goals

It’s easier to be positive about problems and setbacks when you have goals that you’re working toward. Goals will give you motivation to overcome those obstacles when you encounter problems along the way. Without clear goals, it’s harder to make decisions and gauge your progress.

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Learn to set SMART goals to help you achieve more.

7. Consider the Consequences of Negativity

Spend some time thinking about the consequences of negative thinking. Often, it can become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

For example, a person who thinks, “I probably won’t get this job interview,” may put less effort into the interview. As a result, he may decrease his chances of getting the job.

Create a list of all the ways negative thinking impacts your life. It likely influences your behavior, your relationships, and your feelings. Then, create a list of the ways in which positive thinking could be beneficial.

8. Offer Compliments to Others

Look for reasons to compliment others. Be genuine in your praise and compliments, but offer it frequently. This will help you look for the good in other people.

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9. Create a Daily Gratitude List

If you start keeping a daily gratitude list, you’ll start noticing exactly how much you have to be thankful for. This can help you focus on the positive in your life instead of thinking about all the bad things that have happened in the day.

Getting in the habit of showing an attitude of gratitude makes positive thinking more of a habit. Here’re 40 Simple Ways To Practice Gratitude.

10. Practice Self-Care

Take good care of yourself and you’ll be more equipped to think positively.

Get plenty of rest and exercise and practice managing your stress well. Taking care of your physical and mental health will provide you with more energy to focus on positive thinking.

Learn about these 30 Self-Care Habits for a Strong and Healthy Mind, Body and Spirit.

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Featured photo credit: DESIGNECOLOGIST via unsplash.com

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