Advertising
Advertising

5 Positive Mindsets That You Should Have To Get Over A Breakup

5 Positive Mindsets That You Should Have To Get Over A Breakup

Every break up hurts. You lose your self-esteem and your emotions are bruised. Sometimes you may think that it will take forever to heal and you start to ask yourself questions like, “am I a worthy person to be loved,” or “can I be loved again?” A lot of thoughts of unworthiness suddenly swing through your mind and you wonder if you will ever get out of such a situation.

The truth is that although every breakup is hard, it can serve as a step in the right direction. While the present may see gloom and tortuous, there are always amazing possibilities. To tap into what lovely possibilities that awaits you, it is time to develop a positive mindset and look at the bright side of what you are going through. You should never succumb to the negativity of what has been lost rather you should consider the master of what interesting and exciting prospects await you. It is time to envision and picture your new relationship will be like. With these five positive mindsets you can get a grip of where you are and get over your breakup as soon as possible.

Advertising

Sometimes it is better to leave a relationship broken because like a glass it only hurts trying to fix them and put them back together

Not every story is meant to end the exact way we want it. Most times we do nurture selfish inclinations that we could have either made a great couple and we could have lived together happily ever after. However this is not always the case. Although a sad truth, it is always a better option to move on since not all relationships can be fixed.

No one loses love. When it is not reciprocated it has a way of flowing back to soften and purifying the heart

There is nothing wrong in the act of loving. Actually it should be an act of giving without expecting anything in return. So focus on what you have to give and know that nature has a way of rewarding such act of goodness.

Advertising

It is not about the wrong person who walks out of your life, it is about offering something beautiful to the right one

There is no reason to be cynical or bitter about love. If the person was right for you there is no reason for them not to appreciate something so beautiful. However what treasures you have within should be for the right person when they come along.

Letting go of the life we planned is the best way to earn the life that is waiting for us

Every experience whether negative or positive defines who we are. If you want to get the best out of your present situation you have to see the possibilities of growth rather than holding on to what is lost. Getting over the negative experiences of a terrible breakup will push you further to experiencing something better eventually. While you may be reminiscing over the life and possibilities of things that may have happened before the breakup, the brightest future can only be attained out of a forgotten past.

Advertising

Letting go does not mean that you do not care about someone anymore. You are simply willing to take the chance of having control over yourself

While you might want to cling on to thoughts as “what might have been” or “where he/she must be without me” you should understand that you do not have any control over your exes. Every relationship is a choice for every individual involved. If they want to leave, there is nothing you can do about that. It is up to you now to accept the situation, let go, heal and aspire to be a better person with more interesting prospects.

Featured photo credit: http://www.photopin.com via photopin.com

Advertising

More by this author

Casey Imafidon

Specialized in motivation and personal growth, providing advice to make readers fulfilled and spurred on to achieve all that they desire in life.

10 Habits Of People Who Are Highly Successful At Work How to Form Your Success Formula to Get Unstuck in Life 6 Things To Do Every Day To Ensure You Stick To Your Goals 13 Signs You’re A Pretty Quick Learner 8 Reasons Risk Takers Are More Likely To Be Successful

Trending in Communication

1 11 Red Flags in a Relationship Not To Ignore 2 10 Strategies to Keep Moving Forward When Feeling Stuck 3 Easily Misunderstood by Others? 6 Barriers You Should Overcome to Make Communication Less Frustrating 4 7 Simple Ways To Be Famous In One Year 5 How To Feel Happier (10 Scienece-Backed Ways)

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on February 11, 2021

Easily Misunderstood by Others? 6 Barriers You Should Overcome to Make Communication Less Frustrating

Easily Misunderstood by Others? 6 Barriers You Should Overcome to Make Communication Less Frustrating

How often have you said something simple, only to have the person who you said this to misunderstand it or twist the meaning completely around? Nodding your head in affirmative? Then this means that you are being unclear in your communication.

Communication should be simple, right? It’s all about two people or more talking and explaining something to the other. The problem lies in the talking itself, somehow we end up being unclear, and our words, attitude or even the way of talking becomes a barrier in communication, most of the times unknowingly. We give you six common barriers to communication, and how to get past them; for you to actually say what you mean, and or the other person to understand it as well…

The 6 Walls You Need to Break Down to Make Communication Effective

Think about it this way, a simple phrase like “what do you mean” can be said in many different ways and each different way would end up “communicating” something else entirely. Scream it at the other person, and the perception would be anger. Whisper this is someone’s ear and others may take it as if you were plotting something. Say it in another language, and no one gets what you mean at all, if they don’t speak it… This is what we mean when we say that talking or saying something that’s clear in your head, many not mean that you have successfully communicated it across to your intended audience – thus what you say and how, where and why you said it – at times become barriers to communication.[1]

Perceptual Barrier

The moment you say something in a confrontational, sarcastic, angry or emotional tone, you have set up perceptual barriers to communication. The other person or people to whom you are trying to communicate your point get the message that you are disinterested in what you are saying and sort of turn a deaf ear. In effect, you are yelling your point across to person who might as well be deaf![2]

Advertising

The problem: When you have a tone that’s not particularly positive, a body language that denotes your own disinterest in the situation and let your own stereotypes and misgivings enter the conversation via the way you talk and gesture, the other person perceives what you saying an entirely different manner than say if you said the same while smiling and catching their gaze.

The solution: Start the conversation on a positive note, and don’t let what you think color your tone, gestures of body language. Maintain eye contact with your audience, and smile openly and wholeheartedly…

Attitudinal Barrier

Some people, if you would excuse the language, are simply badass and in general are unable to form relationships or even a common point of communication with others, due to their habit of thinking to highly or too lowly of them. They basically have an attitude problem – since they hold themselves in high esteem, they are unable to form genuine lines of communication with anyone. The same is true if they think too little of themselves as well.[3]

The problem: If anyone at work, or even in your family, tends to roam around with a superior air – anything they say is likely to be taken by you and the others with a pinch, or even a bag of salt. Simply because whenever they talk, the first thing to come out of it is their condescending attitude. And in case there’s someone with an inferiority complex, their incessant self-pity forms barriers to communication.

Advertising

The solution: Use simple words and an encouraging smile to communicate effectively – and stick to constructive criticism, and not criticism because you are a perfectionist. If you see someone doing a good job, let them know, and disregard the thought that you could have done it better. It’s their job so measure them by industry standards and not your own.

Language Barrier

This is perhaps the commonest and the most inadvertent of barriers to communication. Using big words, too much of technical jargon or even using just the wrong language at the incorrect or inopportune time can lead to a loss or misinterpretation of communication. It may have sounded right in your head and to your ears as well, but if sounded gobbledygook to the others, the purpose is lost.

The problem: Say you are trying to explain a process to the newbies and end up using every technical word and industry jargon that you knew – your communication has failed if the newbie understood zilch. You have to, without sounding patronizing, explain things to someone in the simplest language they understand instead of the most complex that you do.

The solution: Simplify things for the other person to understand you, and understand it well. Think about it this way: if you are trying to explain something scientific to a child, you tone it down to their thinking capacity, without “dumbing” anything down in the process.[4]

Advertising

Emotional Barrier

Sometimes, we hesitate in opening our mouths, for fear of putting our foot in it! Other times, our emotional state is so fragile that we keep it and our lips zipped tightly together lest we explode. This is the time that our emotions become barriers to communication.[5]

The problem: Say you had a fight at home and are on a slow boil, muttering, in your head, about the injustice of it all. At this time, you have to give someone a dressing down over their work performance. You are likely to transfer at least part of your angst to the conversation then, and talk about unfairness in general, leaving the other person stymied about what you actually meant!

The solution: Remove your emotions and feelings to a personal space, and talk to the other person as you normally would. Treat any phobias or fears that you have and nip them in the bud so that they don’t become a problem. And remember, no one is perfect.

Cultural Barrier

Sometimes, being in an ever-shrinking world means that inadvertently, rules can make cultures clash and cultural clashes can turn into barriers to communication. The idea is to make your point across without hurting anyone’s cultural or religious sentiments.

Advertising

The problem: There are so many ways culture clashes can happen during communication and with cultural clashes; it’s not always about ethnicity. A non-smoker may have problems with smokers taking breaks; an older boss may have issues with younger staff using the Internet too much.

The solution: Communicate only what is necessary to get the point across – and eave your personal sentiments or feelings out of it. Try to be accommodative of the other’s viewpoint, and in case you still need to work it out, do it one to one, to avoid making a spectacle of the other person’s beliefs.[6]

Gender Barrier

Finally, it’s about Men from Mars and Women from Venus. Sometimes, men don’t understand women and women don’t get men – and this gender gap throws barriers in communication. Women tend to take conflict to their graves, literally, while men can move on instantly. Women rely on intuition, men on logic – so inherently, gender becomes a big block in successful communication.[7]

The problem: A male boss may inadvertently rub his female subordinates the wrong way with anti-feminism innuendoes, or even have problems with women taking too many family leaves. Similarly, women sometimes let their emotions get the better of them, something a male audience can’t relate to.

The solution: Talk to people like people – don’t think or classify them into genders and then talk accordingly. Don’t make comments or innuendos that are gender biased – you don’t have to come across as an MCP or as a bra-burning feminist either. Keep gender out of it.

And remember, the key to successful communication is simply being open, making eye contact and smiling intermittently. The battle is usually half won when you say what you mean in simple, straightforward words and keep your emotions out of it.

Reference

Read Next