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Don’t Worry About Being Cute. Worry About Being Interesting

Don’t Worry About Being Cute. Worry About Being Interesting

Adolescence is a tough time: you’re still navigating the road between child and adult, but with the added stress of new set of emotions, experiences, and social situations to tackle. Future colleges and universities expect your applications to be full of extracurricular activities and leadership positions, not just above average grades.

Then, in high school, there are the cute girls with their perfectly tousled hair, unchipped nails, and designer clothes. These girls are definitely popular and get the attention of not just our male classmates but also our teachers as well. (Does anyone else find it strange that some teachers seemed to be more focused on gaining the approval of the cute, popular kids over finding innovative ways to teach?) With all this noise, it’s no wonder you’re gravitating towards the benefits of being cute rather than focusing on all the other things that matter, like your grades and your hobbies. Don’t fall for that trap!

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Instead of spending all that time worrying about being cute, spend it figuring out how to be interesting. Here’s why:

Being cute doesn’t get you into college or get you the job of your dreams.

What you look like is normally not a large part of the application process for college or for most jobs – at least not in the initial stages of application review or resume screening. Rather, building out a robust life with interests, hobbies, and exemplary achievements is much more important. It may feel like being cute is the most important thing in the world right now, but in just a few years you’ll wish that you had spent more time making yourself a whole person, with expertise in different things.  That depth is what will give you perspective to perfect your college application, or build an interesting resume that warrants a call back.

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Worrying about being cute may mean you’ll miss out on important life experiences.

Focusing on being cute, and what you think comes along with it such as popularity, fame, and attention, will rob you of more important life experiences. Have you dreamed of experiencing new cultures, or hiking through nature to learn more about yourself, and discover new things? It’s hard to backpack through Europe or Asia with little more than two changes of clothes and no cosmetics when you’re worried about being cute. Are you a budding writer or musician? Distracting your mind with something that’s so fleeting will impact your deeper concentration and future success. Don’t miss out on the rest of life because you’re preoccupied with something that’s extremely short term and short sighted, like being cute.

Worrying about being cute may actually backfire, no matter how cute you are.

Why is being cute so hard to do? Because you have to do it effortlessly. It has to come naturally and you can’t show insecurity. If you’re preoccupied with being cute, and are constantly worried that you need to keep being cute, it won’t seem natural. In fact, you could come across as fake or insincere.

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Your future life partner already thinks you’re cute.

Whomever you end up with won’t care whether or not you were cute before they met you. In fact, they already think you’re incredibly cute – just as you are. If you’re worried that you won’t be able to find someone because you’re not cute as you are, so you change yourself to fit an idea of what is cute, you just won’t attract the right person for you.

Why worry about something you already are?

You may not have noticed it, but you’re already cute! You have your own unique personality and qualities that make you who you are, and that is definitely cute. Don’t worry about trying to be something that you already are.

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Featured photo credit: meikkis5/maria morri via flickr.com

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Last Updated on January 21, 2020

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

If I was a super hero I’d want my super power to be the ability to motivate everyone around me. Think of how many problems you could solve just by being able to motivate people towards their goals. You wouldn’t be frustrated by lazy co-workers. You wouldn’t be mad at your partner for wasting the weekend in front of the TV. Also, the more people around you are motivated toward their dreams, the more you can capitalize off their successes.

Being able to motivate people is key to your success at work, at home, and in the future because no one can achieve anything alone. We all need the help of others.

So, how to motivate people? Here are 7 ways to motivate others even you can do.

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1. Listen

Most people start out trying to motivate someone by giving them a lengthy speech, but this rarely works because motivation has to start inside others. The best way to motivate others is to start by listening to what they want to do. Find out what the person’s goals and dreams are. If it’s something you want to encourage, then continue through these steps.

2. Ask Open-Ended Questions

Open-ended questions are the best way to figure out what someone’s dreams are. If you can’t think of anything to ask, start with, “What have you always wanted to do?”

“Why do you want to do that?”

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“What makes you so excited about it?”

“How long has that been your dream?”

You need this information the help you with the following steps.

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3. Encourage

This is the most important step, because starting a dream is scary. People are so scared they will fail or look stupid, many never try to reach their goals, so this is where you come in. You must encourage them. Say things like, “I think you will be great at that.” Better yet, say, “I think your skills in X will help you succeed.” For example if you have a friend who wants to own a pet store, say, “You are so great with animals, I think you will be excellent at running a pet store.”

4. Ask About What the First Step Will Be

After you’ve encouraged them, find how they will start. If they don’t know, you can make suggestions, but it’s better to let the person figure out the first step themselves so they can be committed to the process.

5. Dream

This is the most fun step, because you can dream about success. Say things like, “Wouldn’t it be cool if your business took off, and you didn’t have to work at that job you hate?” By allowing others to dream, you solidify the motivation in place and connect their dreams to a future reality.

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6. Ask How You Can Help

Most of the time, others won’t need anything from you, but it’s always good to offer. Just letting the person know you’re there will help motivate them to start. And, who knows, maybe your skills can help.

7. Follow Up

Periodically, over the course of the next year, ask them how their goal is going. This way you can find out what progress has been made. You may need to do the seven steps again, or they may need motivation in another area of their life.

Final Thoughts

By following these seven steps, you’ll be able to encourage the people around you to achieve their dreams and goals. In return, you’ll be more passionate about getting to your goals, you’ll be surrounded by successful people, and others will want to help you reach your dreams …

Oh, and you’ll become a motivational super hero. Time to get a cape!

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Featured photo credit: Thought Catalog via unsplash.com

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