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8 Truths That Only LGBT Couples Would Understand

8 Truths That Only LGBT Couples Would Understand

The LGBT community has recently experienced long-awaited triumphs toward equality. Although same-sex couples have been around since the beginning of time, more are open about their relationships now than any time in history. Over 6 million Americans have come out on Facebook. In the past year alone, 800,000 Americans have changed their Facebook profiles to reflect same gender attraction.

With the Supreme Court decision in June that overturned bans on same-sex marriage, the community has experienced massive strides; however, many people still hold misconceptions about LGBT couples. Here are eight things that only gay and lesbian couples understand but would like for you to know.

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1. They did not choose their sexual orientation.

Just as they did not choose the color of their eyes or skin, they did not choose their sexual orientation. It is innate to who they are. They understand that straight people do not just decide one day to be straight, and they wish people would understand that they do not decide to be gay. They cannot change whom they are attracted to.

2. Coming out is never a one-time event.

Although coming out to family and loved ones is usually the conversation that is most stressful, coming out is never a single, one-time-only event. It is a lifelong process that every LGBT person faces any time they meet new people, move, or change jobs. They must continually determine with whom and in what situations they want to reveal their sexual orientation.

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3. They often feel the need to lead a double life.

If they have not yet come out, they may go to great lengths to keep their relationships hidden, such as telling others their partner is just a “roommate”, or worse, having their partner go elsewhere if someone is coming by for a visit. It can put stress on the relationship and takes tremendous effort to have both a public and private persona, but many still feel they have no choice.

4. They are excellent parents to happy, well-adjusted children.

LGBT couples have always known that sexual orientation has nothing to do with their ability to be a good parent. Studies conducted throughout the years confirm that children of gay and lesbian parents fare no differently than children of heterosexual parents. It is the quality of the relationship between parent and child that affects a child’s well-being, not the sexual orientation of the parent. LGBT couples love their kids no differently than their straight counterparts.

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5. Being LGBT is not a lifestyle.

Just like every other couple on planet Earth, being LGBT is only one small facet of who they are, not their entire lifestyle. LGBT couples have jobs, pay bills, take out the garbage, go to school, raise kids, feed their pets, go grocery shopping, watch TV, have hobbies, go to church, and take part in the same activities as straight couples. It is these activities that make up their lifestyle, not their sexual orientation.

6. They do not all wave rainbow flags and march in pride parades.

This does not mean they don’t have pride, but many LGBT couples just want to live normal lives without being on spectacle. To most, being able to hold their partner’s hand in public on any given day without being stared at means more than all the pride parades in the world.

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7. Mars vs. Venus is not an issue in their relationships.

They get each other, which is a great perk. It is much easier to communicate with someone who is “wired” the same way. Unlike heterosexual couples who have gender differences to navigate, LGBT couples better understand each other’s thoughts, feelings, experiences, and motivations, making communication between them much easier. This is not to say that they don’t argue, just like every relationship there will be rough patches!

8. Their love is like anyone else’s love.

The way they fall in love is no different from straight people. The potent feelings that bring people together are exactly the same. They have strong, long-lasting, happy, monogamous relationships. LGBT relationships can succeed or fail since it is the individuals in a relationship, not the genders, who make or break a relationship.

Featured photo credit: DGLimages via depositphotos.com

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Last Updated on February 13, 2019

10 Things Happy People Do Differently

10 Things Happy People Do Differently

Think being happy is something that happens as a result of luck, circumstance, having money, etc.? Think again.

Happiness is a mindset. And if you’re looking to improve your ability to find happiness, then check out these 10 things happy people do differently.

Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions. -Dalai Lama

1. Happy people find balance in their lives.

Folks who are happy have this in common: they’re content with what they have, and don’t waste a whole lot of time worrying and stressing over things they don’t. Unhappy people do the opposite: they spend too much time thinking about what they don’t have. Happy people lead balanced lives. This means they make time for all the things that are important to them, whether it’s family, friends, career, health, religion, etc.

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2. Happy people abide by the golden rule.

You know that saying you heard when you were a kid, “Do unto others as you would have them do to you.” Well, happy people truly embody this principle. They treat others with respect. They’re sensitive to the thoughts and feelings of other people. They’re compassionate. And they get treated this way (most of the time) in return.

3. Happy people don’t sweat the small stuff.

One of the biggest things happy people do differently compared to unhappy people is they let stuff go. Bad things happen to good people sometimes. Happy people realize this, are able to take things in stride, and move on. Unhappy people tend to dwell on minor inconveniences and issues, which can perpetuate feelings of sadness, guilt, resentment, greed, and anger.

4. Happy people take responsibility for their actions.

Happy people aren’t perfect, and they’re well aware of that. When they screw up, they admit it. They recognize their faults and work to improve on them. Unhappy people tend to blame others and always find an excuse why things aren’t going their way. Happy people, on the other hand, live by the mantra:

“There are two types of people in the world: those that do and those that make excuses why they don’t.”

5. Happy people surround themselves with other happy people.

happiness surrounding

    One defining characteristic of happy people is they tend to hang out with other happy people. Misery loves company, and unhappy people gravitate toward others who share their negative sentiments. If you’re struggling with a bout of sadness, depression, worry, or anger, spend more time with your happiest friends or family members. Chances are, you’ll find that their positive attitude rubs off on you.

    6. Happy people are honest with themselves and others.

    People who are happy often exhibit the virtues of honesty and trustworthiness. They would rather give you candid feedback, even when the truth hurts, and they expect the same in return. Happy people respect people who give them an honest opinion.

    7. Happy people show signs of happiness.

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    smile

      This one may sound obvious but it’s a key differentiator between happy and unhappy people. Think about your happiest friends. Chances are, the mental image you form is of them smiling, laughing, and appearing genuinely happy. On the flip side, those who aren’t happy tend to look the part. Their posture may be slouched and you may perceive a lack of confidence.

      8. Happy people are passionate.

      Another thing happy people have in common is their ability to find their passions in life and pursue those passions to the fullest. Happy people have found what they’re looking for, and they spend their time doing what they love.

      9. Happy people see challenges as opportunities.

      Folks who are happy accept challenges and use them as opportunities to learn and grow. They turn negatives into positives and make the best out of seemingly bad situations. They don’t dwell on things that are out of their control; rather, they seek solutions and creative ways of overcoming obstacles.

      10. Happy people live in the present.

      While unhappy people tend to dwell on the past and worry about the future, happy people live in the moment. They are grateful for “the now” and focus their efforts on living life to the fullest in the present. Their philosophy is:

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      There’s a reason it’s called “the present.” Because life is a gift.

      So if you’d like to bring a little more happiness into your life, think about the 10 principles above and how you can use them to make yourself better.

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