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12 Signs That You’re Loving One That You Shouldn’t

12 Signs That You’re Loving One That You Shouldn’t

Love is a powerful feeling and most times it is very important to take the position such feeling puts you in seriously. Rather than loving the person you shouldn’t be loving you should be in the right relationship, one that brings out the best in you and makes you feel loved. Here are signs to make you aware that you are loving the one you shouldn’t be in love with.

1. Every encounter leaves you burnt out

You should feel energized with the right person, not stressed and overwhelmed after you have spent some time with them.

2. You are more aware in the relationship

Many decisions should be made spontaneously and automatically when you’re loving the right person. But when you’re loving the wrong person it is as if you are burdened with the decision of including them in every plan you make. For example decisions about your future should not be the one you are anxious about, you should be glad to have them be a part of your future.

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3. You do not look forward to every time you want to hang out with them

You are not expectant or excited at the times you will be hanging out with them. Rather it seems to be more like an obligation to be spending time with them.

4. You have arguments a lot

Arguments are important to every relationship, since no one is perfect. But every argument shouldn’t be one where you battle it out to know which one is right or wrong or who is deserving of a win or a defeat.

5. You feel inferior in the relationship

You do not feel complimented by the other person, rather you feel bruised and totally dominated by the other person. As much as you would love the relationship to improve your self-esteem, it diminishes it the more.

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6. You do not feel any spark in the relationship

The relationship seems drudgery and boring. While the relationship should make you happy and bring out the light and enthusiasm in you, it is as if it strains you.

7. You do not see things working out in the future

You are not certain about the relationship. You have a lot of doubts, and it is more like “if you are still going to be together.” Such does not make your plans accurate and precise.

8. You do not reveal your true self to them

You are pretending and you are not real in the relationship. You would prefer to present a false persona just to be more appealing and make the other person more comfortable with you.

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9. You are very cautious in the relationship

You are not comfortable when you say or do something because you are always worried about how the other person will feel or what they will say about your actions. You tend to over-think every single thing you want to say and how you are going to present your statement to them.

10. You are always defensive and protective of everything you have with them

You are not willing to share or offer your items or resources to them. You see them as a disturbance and an obstacle to living the fullness of your life.

11. You are not willing to show them off to your friends and family

You are not proud of them around you. You do not showcase them and you really do not care about how your friends or family views them.

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12. You have a stagnant relationship with them

Your relationship is not progressive, it lacks growth and it never seems as if it is going to the next phase. It is not like any of you cares about where you are in the relationship or even notice the stagnation in the relationship. It actually seems more comforting or assuring for you to stay in the current situation forever rather than make an effort to improve it.

Featured photo credit: http://www.compfight.com via compfight.com

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Casey Imafidon

Specialized in motivation and personal growth, providing advice to make readers fulfilled and spurred on to achieve all that they desire in life.

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Last Updated on January 21, 2020

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

If I was a super hero I’d want my super power to be the ability to motivate everyone around me. Think of how many problems you could solve just by being able to motivate people towards their goals. You wouldn’t be frustrated by lazy co-workers. You wouldn’t be mad at your partner for wasting the weekend in front of the TV. Also, the more people around you are motivated toward their dreams, the more you can capitalize off their successes.

Being able to motivate people is key to your success at work, at home, and in the future because no one can achieve anything alone. We all need the help of others.

So, how to motivate people? Here are 7 ways to motivate others even you can do.

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1. Listen

Most people start out trying to motivate someone by giving them a lengthy speech, but this rarely works because motivation has to start inside others. The best way to motivate others is to start by listening to what they want to do. Find out what the person’s goals and dreams are. If it’s something you want to encourage, then continue through these steps.

2. Ask Open-Ended Questions

Open-ended questions are the best way to figure out what someone’s dreams are. If you can’t think of anything to ask, start with, “What have you always wanted to do?”

“Why do you want to do that?”

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“What makes you so excited about it?”

“How long has that been your dream?”

You need this information the help you with the following steps.

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3. Encourage

This is the most important step, because starting a dream is scary. People are so scared they will fail or look stupid, many never try to reach their goals, so this is where you come in. You must encourage them. Say things like, “I think you will be great at that.” Better yet, say, “I think your skills in X will help you succeed.” For example if you have a friend who wants to own a pet store, say, “You are so great with animals, I think you will be excellent at running a pet store.”

4. Ask About What the First Step Will Be

After you’ve encouraged them, find how they will start. If they don’t know, you can make suggestions, but it’s better to let the person figure out the first step themselves so they can be committed to the process.

5. Dream

This is the most fun step, because you can dream about success. Say things like, “Wouldn’t it be cool if your business took off, and you didn’t have to work at that job you hate?” By allowing others to dream, you solidify the motivation in place and connect their dreams to a future reality.

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6. Ask How You Can Help

Most of the time, others won’t need anything from you, but it’s always good to offer. Just letting the person know you’re there will help motivate them to start. And, who knows, maybe your skills can help.

7. Follow Up

Periodically, over the course of the next year, ask them how their goal is going. This way you can find out what progress has been made. You may need to do the seven steps again, or they may need motivation in another area of their life.

Final Thoughts

By following these seven steps, you’ll be able to encourage the people around you to achieve their dreams and goals. In return, you’ll be more passionate about getting to your goals, you’ll be surrounded by successful people, and others will want to help you reach your dreams …

Oh, and you’ll become a motivational super hero. Time to get a cape!

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Featured photo credit: Thought Catalog via unsplash.com

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