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6 Struggles Empaths Understand (And That’s Why You Should Appreciate Them)

6 Struggles Empaths Understand (And That’s Why You Should Appreciate Them)

If you have empathy, you can understand and even feel what other people are going through when they are up against grief, hardship, disappointment, pain, and a host of other harrowing emotions. The word “empathy” comes from two Greek words: emaptheia, which means “passion,” and pathein, which means “to experience.”

Why are some people more empathetic than others? Research by Dr. Elaine Aron of Stony Brook University of New York shows that the brains of empaths have a stronger reaction when faced with certain emotions.

“We found that areas of the brain involved with awareness and emotion, particularly those areas connected with empathetic feelings, in the highly sensitive people showed substantially greater blood flow to relevant brain areas than was seen in individuals with low sensitivity during the 12-second period when they viewed the photos [of happy and sad faces].” — Dr. Aron.

If you are empathetic, you show you understand, you listen and you are compassionate. You may even take action and reach out by being sympathetic and helpful.

But when you are an empath, you are in a whole other category. You are so sensitive that you may actually absorb people’s emotions and suffering, even to the point of actually feeling them yourself. This is so intense that empaths have a hard time trying to put up shields so that they can actually survive without becoming engulfed. Here are 6 struggles that we empaths have to cope with on a daily basis. If you are one of us, you will have no trouble relating to these. If you are not, you might appreciate us even more.

1. We feel overwhelmed

If we are close to a person who is suffering a bereavement, we may feel that person’s sorrow so intensely that we will want to cry with them. The only problem here is that this prevents us from taking helpful action or being useful in some practical way. We are paralyzed and we wish we could do more.

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2. We are shock absorbers

When it comes to witnessing harrowing scenes of migrants drowning while fleeing war, we cannot control the flood of emotions we feel. This is a highly desirable state in many ways because it makes us more compassionate human beings. The downside is that we become sponges for the world’s suffering and injustice. Every time we turn on the TV news, it is dragging us down and making us exhausted.

3. We have to learn to say “no”

We realize that there is a limit to getting drawn in when people who are negative and toxic try to suck us into their worlds. Empaths have to realize that true happiness, joy, and contentment come from within a person. It is not our job to make other people happy, but this is so hard when we have to set the limits and boundaries. A good tip is to play for time and not respond immediately to a cry for help — we all need to assess whether our energy and space are at risk.

4. We may be physical empaths

The problem here is even more acute because if we are physical empaths, we seem to absorb other people’s pains, illnesses, and stress. It often means we are hypochondriacs. We seem to have a very thin protective shield, which means that other people’s negative energy is getting through to us much more easily. Nobody is quite sure why this is so. The best way we can protect ourselves from this is to learn to practise mindfulness, breathing exercises, and to surround ourselves with friends who emanate positivity and healthy energy.

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5. We can spot the fakes

Our empathic antenna sometimes have to work overtime. You know those people who praise you to the skies or those filled with anger or hate but who are charming on the surface? Being an empath helps us to spot these ones. It also helps us to be on our guard when certain people want to exploit our sensitivity and compassion.

“Empaths often possess the ability to sense others on many different levels.” — Christel Broederlow

6. We are super sensitive

This goes for everything from being aware of what a person wants, thinks, and desires to being super sensitive in the physical sense. This usually means that we are easily startled and are disturbed by bright lights, rough fabrics, and our sense of smell is extremely sharp. Now you know why we rarely watch police shows and other violent stuff on TV.

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Are you an empath? Why not take the quiz here to actually find out? Remember these are labels and that life is for living and helping others when we can.

Featured photo credit: Sympathy/Javier Kohen via flickr.com

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Robert Locke

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Last Updated on September 20, 2018

7 Powerful Questions To Find Out What You Want To Do With Your Life

7 Powerful Questions To Find Out What You Want To Do With Your Life

What do I want to do with my life? It’s a question all of us think about at one point or another.

For some, the answer comes easily. For others, it takes a lifetime to figure out.

It’s easy to just go through the motions and continue to do what’s comfortable and familiar. But for those of you who seek fulfillment, who want to do more, these questions will help you paint a clearer picture of what you want to do with your life.

1. What are the things I’m most passionate about?

The first step to living a more fulfilling life is to think about the things that you’re passionate about.

What do you love? What fulfills you? What “work” do you do that doesn’t feel like work? Maybe you enjoy writing, maybe you love working with animals or maybe you have a knack for photography.

The point is, figure out what you love doing, then do more of it.

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2. What are my greatest accomplishments in life so far?

Think about your past experiences and the things in your life you’re most proud of.

How did those accomplishments make you feel? Pretty darn good, right? So why not try and emulate those experiences and feelings?

If you ran a marathon once and loved the feeling you had afterwards, start training for another one. If your child grew up to be a star athlete or musician because of your teachings, then be a coach or mentor for other kids.

Continue to do the things that have been most fulfilling for you.

3. If my life had absolutely no limits, what would I choose to have and what would I choose to do?

Here’s a cool exercise: Think about what you would do if you had no limits.

If you had all the money and time in the world, where would you go? What would you do? Who would you spend time with?

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These answers can help you figure out what you want to do with your life. It doesn’t mean you need millions of dollars to be happy though.

What it does mean is answering these questions will help you set goals to reach certain milestones and create a path toward happiness and fulfillment. Which leads to our next question …

4. What are my goals in life?

Goals are a necessary component to set you up for a happy future. So answer these questions:

Once you figure out the answers to each of these, you’ll have a much better idea of what you should do with your life.

5. Whom do I admire most in the world?

Following the path of successful people can set you up for success.

Think about the people you respect and admire most. What are their best qualities? Why do you respect them? What can you learn from them?

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You’re the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with.[1] So don’t waste your time with people who hold you back from achieving your dreams.

Spend more time with happy, successful, optimistic people and you’ll become one of them.

6. What do I not like to do?

An important part of figuring out what you want to do with your life is honestly assessing what you don’t want to do.

What are the things you despise? What bugs you the most about your current job?

Maybe you hate meetings even though you sit through 6 hours of them every day. If that’s the case, find a job where you can work more independently.

The point is, if you want something to change in your life, you need to take action. Which leads to our final question …

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7. How hard am I willing to work to get what I want?

Great accomplishments never come easy. If you want to do great things with your life, you’re going to have to make a great effort. That will probably mean putting in more hours the average person, getting outside your comfort zone and learning as much as you can to achieve as much as you can.

But here’s the cool part: it’s often the journey that is the most fulfilling part. It’s during these seemingly small, insignificant moments that you’ll often find that “aha” moments that helps you answer the question,

“What do I want to do with my life?”

So take the first step toward improving your life. You won’t regret it.

Featured photo credit: Andrew Ly via unsplash.com

Reference

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