Advertising
Advertising

A List Of Things You Better Stop Doing When You Turn 30s

A List Of Things You Better Stop Doing When You Turn 30s

It is so sad and unfortunate that not everyone wants to grow up. Many view growing up as intimidating, as a loss of something. You have to be aware that life is made up of stages. We cannot have the same mindset we had when we were entering high school now that we are stepping into the wonderful age of 30. By the time you turn 30, you should have been able to figure out certain things and reached a level of maturity. You should have been able to discard certain habits and reactions to things that happen to you.

As you reach the age of 30, you should start becoming more aware of who you are and what stage you are in life. Here are 30 things every person turning 30 should stop doing.

Advertising

  1. Calling your relatives to bail you out of a financial crisis you should be taking care of instead.
  2. Living a life of regrets. Looking back at the past and wondering what would have happened, or thinking about that job you never got, or that person you never got married.
  3. Blaming others for how your life is turning out – pointing fingers at your parents, family and your environment for how your life has come to be.
  4. Believing and expecting that your life should have turned perfect by now, rather than knowing that success is a process made out of failures.
  5. Consuming yourself in worry about what others are thinking of you.
  6. Spending most of your money on partying, alcohol and eating out.
  7. Waiting for others to fix things you can do yourself.
  8. Showing off how drunk you were at a particular party on social media.
  9. Seeking other people’s approval.
  10. Having to keep certain friends who are a bad influence on you out of convenience because you are too scared or nervous to cut them out of your life.
  11. Giving up on a venture or a task because it has suddenly appeared difficult to undertake.
  12. Holding on to grudges and consuming yourself in resentment over a past misdeed of a good friend.
  13. Ignoring your relationships, whether with your family or with friends who have been there for you in the past.
  14. Spending more than you earn and running into debt every now and then.
  15. Stalking your ex on social media instead of moving on with your life.
  16. Advertising your new designer wrist watch or other luxurious items on social media in a bid to create unnecessary attention.
  17. Making excuses for not maintaining a healthy lifestyle.
  18. Waiting for things to happen rather than going out to make these things happen.
  19. Trying to be perfect all the time and taking yourself too seriously.
  20. Thinking that you can live up to others’ expectation of you.
  21. Envying the lifestyle of other people you happen to catch on social media.
  22. Buying inferior items because you are trying so hard to save a buck.
  23. Becoming irrational and running wild with thoughts and beliefs without being fully informed.
  24. Dressing up like a teenager and going along with fads, rather than dressing as an authentic image of who you are.
  25. Denying the fact that you will soon be hitting 30, and wanting to be stuck with your 20s for life.
  26. Trying to pull off some alcohol stunts every now and then.
  27. Posing with a peace hand sign or any kind of sign in a photo.
  28. Having posters of Terminator, Fresh Prince of Bel Air or The Godfather to decorate your apartment.
  29. Engaging in online arguments, and responding to every confrontational attacks made at you.
  30. Ignoring the fact that you have so much going for you in your life that you should be thankful for.

Featured photo credit: http://www.pixabay.com via pixabay.com

Advertising

Advertising

More by this author

Casey Imafidon

Specialized in motivation and personal growth, providing advice to make readers fulfilled and spurred on to achieve all that they desire in life.

10 Habits Of People Who Are Highly Successful At Work How to Form Your Success Formula to Get Unstuck in Life 6 Things To Do Every Day To Ensure You Stick To Your Goals 13 Signs You’re A Pretty Quick Learner 8 Reasons Risk Takers Are More Likely To Be Successful

Trending in Communication

1 7 Ways To Have More Confident Body Language 2 How to Apologize When You Have Made a Mistake 3 7 Science-Backed Books About Spirituality That Will Change Your Life 4 20 Things Life Is Too Short to Worry About 5 How to Find Inner Peace and Lasting Happiness

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on January 15, 2021

7 Ways To Have More Confident Body Language

7 Ways To Have More Confident Body Language

The popular idiomatic saying that “actions speak louder than words” has been around for centuries, but even to this day, most people struggle with at least one area of nonverbal communication. Consequently, many of us aspire to have more confident body language but don’t have the knowledge and tools necessary to change what are largely unconscious behaviors.

Given that others’ perceptions of our competence and confidence are predominantly influenced by what we do with our faces and bodies, it’s important to develop greater self-awareness and consciously practice better posture, stance, eye contact, facial expressions, hand movements, and other aspects of body language.

Posture

First things first: how is your posture? Let’s start with a quick self-assessment of your body.

  • Are your shoulders slumped over or rolled back in an upright posture?
  • When you stand up, do you evenly distribute your weight or lean excessively to one side?
  • Does your natural stance place your feet relatively shoulder-width apart or are your feet and legs close together in a closed-off position?
  • When you sit, does your lower back protrude out in a slumped position or maintain a straight, spine-friendly posture in your seat?

All of these are important considerations to make when evaluating and improving your posture and stance, which will lead to more confident body language over time. If you routinely struggle with maintaining good posture, consider buying a posture trainer/corrector, consulting a chiropractor or physical therapist, stretching daily, and strengthening both your core and back muscles.

Facial Expressions

Are you prone to any of the following in personal or professional settings?

  • Bruxism (tight, clenched jaw or grinding teeth)
  • Frowning and/or furrowing brows
  • Avoiding direct eye contact and/or staring at the ground

If you answered “yes” to any of these, then let’s start by examining various ways in which you can project confident body language through your facial expressions.

Advertising

1. Understand How Others Perceive Your Facial Expressions

A December 2020 study by UC Berkeley and Google researchers utilized a deep neural network to analyze facial expressions in six million YouTube clips representing people from over 140 countries. The study found that, despite socio-cultural differences, people around the world tended to use about 70% of the same facial expressions in response to different emotional stimuli and situations.[1]

The study’s researchers also published a fascinating interactive map to demonstrate how their machine learning technology assessed various facial expressions and determined subtle differences in emotional responses.

This study highlights the social importance of facial expressions because whether or not we’re consciously aware of them—by gazing into a mirror or your screen on a video conferencing platform—how we present our faces to others can have tremendous impacts on their perceptions of us, our confidence, and our emotional states. This awareness is the essential first step towards

2. Relax Your Face

New research on bruxism and facial tension found the stresses and anxieties of Covid-19 lockdowns led to considerable increases in orofacial pain, jaw-clenching, and teeth grinding, particularly among women.[2]

The National Institute of Dental and Craniofacial Research estimates that more than 10 million Americans alone have temporomandibular joint dysfunction (TMJ syndrome), and facial tension can lead to other complications such as insomnia, wrinkles, dry skin, and dark, puffy bags under your eyes.[3])

To avoid these unpleasant outcomes, start practicing progressive muscle relaxation techniques and taking breaks more frequently throughout the day to moderate facial tension.[4] You should also try out some biofeedback techniques to enhance your awareness of involuntary bodily processes like facial tension and achieve more confident body language as a result.[5]

Advertising

3. Improve Your Eye Contact

Did you know there’s an entire subfield of kinesic communication research dedicated to eye movements and behaviors called oculesics?[6] It refers to various communication behaviors including direct eye contact, averting one’s gaze, pupil dilation/constriction, and even frequency of blinking. All of these qualities can shape how other people perceive you, which means that eye contact is yet another area of nonverbal body language that we should be more mindful of in social interactions.

The ideal type (direct/indirect) and duration of eye contact depends on a variety of factors, such as cultural setting, differences in power/authority/age between the parties involved, and communication context. Research has shown that differences in the effects of eye contact are particularly prominent when comparing East Asian and Western European/North American cultures.[7]

To improve your eye contact with others, strive to maintain consistent contact for at least 3 to 4 seconds at a time, consciously consider where you’re looking while listening to someone else, and practice eye contact as much as possible (as strange as this may seem in the beginning, it’s the best way to improve).

3. Smile More

There are many benefits to smiling and laughing, and when it comes to working on more confident body language, this is an area that should be fun, low-stakes, and relatively stress-free.

Smiling is associated with the “happiness chemical” dopamine and the mood-stabilizing hormone, serotonin. Many empirical studies have shown that smiling generally leads to positive outcomes for the person smiling, and further research has shown that smiling can influence listeners’ perceptions of our confidence and trustworthiness as well.

4. Hand Gestures

Similar to facial expressions and posture, what you do with your hands while speaking or listening in a conversation can significantly influence others’ perceptions of you in positive or negative ways.

Advertising

It’s undoubtedly challenging to consciously account for all of your nonverbal signals while simultaneously trying to stay engaged with the verbal part of the discussion, but putting in the effort to develop more bodily awareness now will make it much easier to unconsciously project more confident body language later on.

5. Enhance Your Handshake

In the article, “An Anthropology of the Handshake,” University of Copenhagen social anthropology professor Bjarke Oxlund assessed the future of handshaking in wake of the Covid-19 pandemic:[8]

“Handshakes not only vary in function and meaning but do so according to social context, situation and scale. . . a public discussion should ensue on the advantages and disadvantages of holding on to the tradition of shaking hands as the conventional gesture of greeting and leave-taking in a variety of circumstances.”

It’s too early to determine some of the ways in which Covid-19 has permanently changed our social norms and professional etiquette standards, but it’s reasonable to assume that handshaking may retain its importance in American society even after this pandemic. To practice more confident body language in the meantime, the video on the science of the perfect handshake below explains what you need to know.

6. Complement Your Verbals With Hand Gestures

As you know by now, confident communication involves so much more than simply smiling more or sounding like you know what you’re talking about. What you do with your hands can be particularly influential in how others perceive you, whether you’re fidgeting with an object, clenching your fists, hiding your hands in your pockets, or calmly gesturing to emphasize important points you’re discussing.

Social psychology researchers have found that “iconic gestures”—hand movements that appear to be meaningfully related to the speaker’s verbal content—can have profound impacts on listeners’ information retention. In other words, people are more likely to engage with you and remember more of what you said when you speak with complementary hand gestures instead of just your voice.[9]

Advertising

Further research on hand gestures has shown that even your choice of the left or right hand for gesturing can influence your ability to clearly convey information to listeners, which supports the notion that more confident body language is readily achievable through greater self-awareness and deliberate nonverbal actions.[10]

Final Takeaways

Developing better posture, enhancing your facial expressiveness, and practicing hand gestures can vastly improve your communication with other people. At first, it will be challenging to consciously practice nonverbal behaviors that many of us are accustomed to performing daily without thinking about them.

If you ever feel discouraged, however, remember that there’s no downside to consistently putting in just a little more time and effort to increase your bodily awareness. With the tips and strategies above, you’ll be well on your way to embracing more confident body language and amplifying others’ perceptions of you in no time.

More Tips on How to Develop a Confident Body Language

Featured photo credit: Maria Lupan via unsplash.com

Reference

Read Next