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A Mind-Blowing reason for always being late

A Mind-Blowing reason for always being late

“Why can’t you put in a little more effort to leave the house 30 minutes earlier?!” Ever had a conversation that sounded a little bit like that? Tired of being late? Tired of getting blamed and put on the spot every time you arrive late? Well, this article is for you.

To be honest, I was like that before I made an amazing discovery. Always late to events, procrastinating and never on time. That was till a certain event occurred that enlightened me. But before I share with you what that enlightenment is, let me share with you more about what I believed before that fateful event.

Is everyone lazy, therefore bound to be late?

Like all teenagers, I was someone that constantly held onto the belief that ‘Everyone would always be late!’ It was a concept that is being used by the entire world. The concept of “Never earlier, only later”. Everyone arrives later than the expected time, submits their projects past the deadline, shops closes earlier but never opens earlier. There is only one reason that fuels this concept, laziness.

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Understanding this concept at a fairly young age, I had the misconception that this is what we humans should be doing. Well, I was definitely wrong at that point of time for this concept has definitely caused me to be stuck in countless sticky situations. Believing that everyone would never reach on time, I started a social experiment. It was a minor one with my friends as the test subject.

Do you have a reason to arrive early?

So I am a christian and I go to church every Sunday. There was this thing in my church and we like to call it a ‘Cell Group’. It is a group of people from the same age group that comes together before service every Sunday and we would start mini discussions. Everyone was supposed to gather at 8.30am in the morning! However, many of us never arrive there on time. I am sadly one of them as well. It wasn’t a matter of principle or promise, it was a matter of our own determination and effort that we invested in this morning process! The reason why I seldom reach on time is simple. It is because I felt that there isn’t a reason to arrive earlier.

One time, our cell group leaders decided to replace the cell group meeting with a breakfast session. I really love food and that was my reason to arrive on time. That day, I woke up earlier and had a driven goal to reach the destination earlier and on time. That is because I wanted to enjoy the full duration of the breakfast session! This event concluded my experiment, for I had made an amazing discovery. I have understood why i was always late. It was because I didn’t have a reason to arrive earlier or on time! Here is an advice that I have believed in for my entire life!

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Do you want to arrive on time?

One of the biggest reasons why people are late is because they do not have a reason to be there on time! They do not have a reason to go earlier. There isn’t a strong reason that motivates them to go earlier. Motivation and determination are both lacking in them. Before I share with you the explanation, here is a scenario for you to ponder on

It is 8.30 in the morning and you slept extremely late last night. You were supposed to meet your friends at 9 to do community work, but you just woke up! It is 8.30 in the morning and you slept extremely late last night. You were supposed to meet your friends at 9 to play but you just woke up!

Considering that the destination is at the same place, which one do you think you will have more determination in doing? I would reckon that many would choose option 2! I would too, obviously since there is a reason that is pushing us! The fact that ‘I am going to meet my friends to play’ is a strong enough reason for you to start rushing. We humans need a pushing force, someone that knocks us on the head and push us forward.

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A promise is a reason, too

To stop being late, you need to have a reason. A reason that you believed in. My belief used to be a physical belief where the situations and the people involved becomes the reason. But now, I believe that I have to either be early or on time for all meetings and events. This is because I have developed the mindset that the time we set is a promise. A promise between you and the other party and you shall not break it. A promise is a commitment you share between you and the other party and you should always have the mindset of meeting that commitment.

Have the mindset that the time set is a promise. A promise that you should try your best to keep! This is a reason which you can use today to stop being late. All you got to do is to believe and maintain this mindset. Do not break the promise. Do not just think about yourself, but about others as well. Put others and their feelings before you! This is how I am punctual for many of my Meetups and events! It is because I consider how others will feel, if I am late and they have to wait.

Find your own reason to be on time!

You do not have to follow my reason. I am just sharing with you the importance of having a reason! You need to find a reason that resonates strongly in your heart. It isn’t an easy process, but once you got the hang of it, you will realize that this concept can be applied to many different areas in your life.

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You have a choice of being early or late. It is entirely up to you and the amount of effort you put into the process. It is all reliant on your mindset. Your mindset determines the importance of the different choices and you decide which choice you want to take. It is all up to you. You can choose to be early or late.

This mindset advice I shared with you isn’t going to change your life overnight. You have to invest time and determination in order for it to work. You need to find a reason that is stronger than your love for yourself! This is because you will procrastinate if the reason is weaker than your love for yourself! The reason will not be enough to push you out of your laziness zone! My reason is to not break a promise, what is your reason?

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Published on July 22, 2019

The Secret to Success Is Failure

The Secret to Success Is Failure

You see a job that you’d love to do; and, you decide to go for it.

You submit your application, and then are pleased to find a few days later that you’re invited for an interview. This goes well, and you begin to have quiet optimism that a job offer will be coming your way soon…

It doesn’t.

Instead, you receive a letter saying thank you — but, they’ve decided to go with another candidate.

At this point, you could allow yourself to feel defeated, sad, and perhaps even a little angry. These are normal responses to bad news. Yet, it’s not wise to let them fester and disrupt your goals. Successful people don’t let failures kill their dreams.

Sure, they might temporarily feel deflated. But, very quickly, they pick themselves back up again and begin planning their next steps towards success.

How about you? Do you currently feel embarrassed or guilty about failing?

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Don’t worry if you do, as most of us have been programmed since childhood to see failure as a bad thing. Yet, as I’m going to show you in the next few minutes, this programming is dead wrong — failure is actually an essential part of success.

Don’t Be Tempted by Perfection

The first thing I want you to think about is this:

Resisting failure is, at its core, seeking perfection. And, perfection doesn’t exist.

That’s why perfectionists are also likely to be chronic procrastinators.

As Psychology Today noted in their article Pitfalls of Perfectionism, people who constantly seek for perfection stop themselves from engaging in challenging experiences.[1] That’s because these perfectionists are less creative and innovative than the average person — plus they’re less likely to take risks. Add these factors together, and you have someone who is overly focused on their own performance and is always quick to defend themselves. Unfortunately, these traits prevent them from having the necessary focus when it comes to learning new tasks.

Let me be clear: Striving for perfection is not the same as striving for excellence.

The former is a fool’s quest for the unattainable; while the latter is really just about doing our very best (which we can all obtain).

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And, there’s another problem that perfectionists have to deal with. Namely, when they fail to reach their ideal, they feel dejected and defeated. And — as you can imagine — repeat this often enough, and these people can end up feeling bitter and depressed about their lives.

So, forget about seeking perfection, and instead, focus on always doing your very best.

Why Failure Is Good

I recently came across a Forbes article Failing Your Way To Success: Why Failure Is A Crucial Ingredient For Success[2] that helped explain why most people are opposed to failure.

The article referenced the work of two world-renowned psychologists (Daniel Kahneman and Amos Tversky), who were awarded a Nobel Prize for their work. They discovered something very interesting: the effect of a loss is twice as great as the gain from a win.

Have you ever thought about that before?

What it means is that failure has a far greater negative impact on us than the positive impact of an equivalent win. It’s no wonder then that most people are afraid to fail.

And, here’s where it gets interesting…

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Amazon (which along with Apple, Facebook and Google, is considered one of the Big Four technology companies) has a culture that is tolerant of failure. And Jeff Bezos — Amazon’s founder and CEO — believes that this culture is one of the main reasons for the company’s big achievements over the last 25 years. In a letter to shareholders, he said:

“Failure comes part and parcel with invention. It’s not optional. We understand that and believe in failing early and iterating until we get it right.” 

The truth is, failure can open up a world of exciting opportunities for you.

How does it do this?

By constantly showing you new avenues to travel on. And, by helping you learn from your mistakes — so you can be better next time around. It also helps you identify what’s not working for your life, and what is.

So instead of seeing something as detrimental to success, you should see it as a tool FOR success. A tool that will help you to continually refine your journey in life.

If you still need some convincing that the secret to success is failure, then take a look at the following excerpts from our article 10 Famous Failures to Success Stories That Will Inspire You to Carry On:

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• J.K. Rowling encountered a catalog of failures shortly after graduating from college, including: being jobless, the breakdown of her marriage, and living as a lone parent. However, instead of giving up on life, she used these failures to propel her to write the Harry Potter fantasy series — the best-selling book series in history.

• Walt Disney didn’t have an easy start either. He dropped out of school at a young age in a failed attempt to join the army. Later, one of his early business ventures, Laugh-o-Gram Studios, went bankrupt. He was also fired from a Missouri newspaper for “not being creative enough.” (Yes, you read that correctly.) Was he defeated by these failures? Just ask Mickey Mouse.

• Michael Jordan had this to say about the power of failure: “I’ve missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I’ve been trusted to take the game-winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.”

Embrace Failure, and Prepare for Success

I hope this has been an eye-opener for you.

Failure has long been branded a leper; but in reality, it’s a healthy, essential component of success.

The trick of course is to develop the mindset of a winner. Someone who sees failures as stepping stones to success — and defeats as important learning experiences.

So, are you ready to embrace your failures and take the proud road to success?

I sincerely hope so.

Featured photo credit: Bruce Mars via unsplash.com

Reference

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