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Encountered Difficult People And Wanna Escape? No! You Should Deal With Them These 5 Ways

Encountered Difficult People And Wanna Escape? No! You Should Deal With Them These 5 Ways

The easiest thing to do is to run away from difficult people, but it’s also often the weakest option available to you. Who should you define as difficult people? They’re the ones who are hard to live, work or just co-exist with. They often bring out the worst in us by touching our deepest wounds through their attitudes and actions. But you can learn to survive and even thrive in your encounters with difficult people by reading the actionable tips below:

1. Appreciate the difficult people in your life

This is one of the hardest steps, but it’s also one of the most necessary. It’s easy to despair over those who make your life more challenging, but you have to learn to take comfort in all you can learn from your interactions with them. Treat difficult people like one of life’s tests, which, if it doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger. Your dealings with them, while often not pleasant, will help you build a resilience against other obstacles the world might put in your path. That inner strength will stick with you long after you and the difficult person in your life part ways.

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2. Enable the difficult people to bring out the best in you

As mentioned above, a difficult person is often someone who brings out the worst in us, either in our behavior, our state of mind or something else that affects us deeply. But, if the worst of you comes out in a difficult person’s presence, you have the opportunity to face those demons head-on. You can confront the harmful parts of your psyche by using difficult people as bait to lure them out. For example, if a co-worker chats and gossips all day while you’re hard at work, you’re probably going to become upset with them. But by making yourself accept that their actions are not your issue and letting go, you obtain a powerful meditative quality. Even if a difficult person never changes, you will still benefit in some way from the strife they cause you.

3. Spend more time with them

Instead of running away from your problems, it might be best to actually take a few steps in the direction of what’s causing you agony. Even if someone’s challenging you and adding stress to your life, sometimes they’re only difficult in your eyes because you’re expecting something they can’t deliver or setting unrealistic expectations for them. One way to shake those expectations is by getting to know them a little bit better. Perspective is everything, so learn about their circumstances and their point of view to better understand where they’re coming from.

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4. Set a goal

It’s always important, but goal setting is absolutely paramount when you’re dealing with difficult people. You need to decide in advance what you want to get out of your experiences with those difficult people. That could be something as simple as not being depressed or discouraged by their negative attitudes, or something more difficult like turning their attitudes around. Whatever your goal, always keep it in mind when dealing with difficult people.

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5. Try to make their lives less difficult

Sometimes people are difficult for a pretty obvious reason: they’ve faced a lot of adversity in their life. That adversity might be mental, emotional, physical, and so on, but whatever their struggles, you might be able to help them cope in a more healthy manner. Follow the Golden Rule of treating others as you want to be treated, even if they’re not doing the same in return. The difficult people in life might never reciprocate the good will you’ve shown them, but that’s just gravy. You’ll find yourself happier and more at peace just through taking the higher ground when dealing with difficult people.

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More by this author

Matt OKeefe

Matt is a marketer and writer who shares about lifestyle and productivity tips on Lifehack.

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Last Updated on October 17, 2019

How to Spend More Quality Time with Your Partner

How to Spend More Quality Time with Your Partner

You see your partner every single day. They are the first person you talk to in the morning and the last person you kiss goodnight.

But does seeing each other day in and day out equal a healthy relationship? Not necessarily.

Spending quality time with your partner is the best way to ensure your relationship stays healthy and strong. This means going above and beyond sitting together while you watch Netflix or going out for the occasional dinner. You deserve more from your relationship – and so does your spouse!

What does quality time mean? It means spending time with your spouse without interruption. It’s a chance for you to come together and talk. Communication will build emotional intimacy and trust.

Quality time is also about expressing love in a physical way. Not sex, necessarily (but that’s great, too!) but through hand-holding, cuddling, caressing, and tickling. Studies show that these displays of affection will boost partner satisfaction.[1]

So how do you spend quality time with your partner? Here are 13 relationship tips on making the most out of your time with your partner.

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1. Recognize the Signs

If you want a healthy relationship, you have to learn how to recognize the signs that you need to spend more quality time together.

Some telltale signs include:

  • You’re always on your phones.
  • You value friendships or hobbies over quality time with your spouse.
  • You aren’t together during important events.
  • You are arguing more often or lack connection.
  • You don’t make plans or date nights.
  • You’re not happy.

If you are experiencing any of these relationship symptoms, know that quality time together can reverse the negative effects of the signs above.

2. Try New Things Together

Have you ever wanted to learn how to play an instrument or speak another language? How about skydive or ballroom dance?

Instead of viewing these as solo hobbies and interests, why not involve your partner?

Trying new activities together builds healthy relationships because it encourages spouses to rely on one another for emotional and physical support.

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Shared hobbies also promote marital friendship, and the Journal of Happiness Studies found that marital satisfaction was twice as high for couples who viewed each other as best friends.[2]

3. Schedule in Tech-Free Time

Your phone is a great way to listen to music, watch videos, and keep up-to-date with friends and family. But is your phone good for your relationship?

Many couples phone snub, or ‘phub’, one another. Studies show that phubbing can lower relationship satisfaction and increase one’s chances of depression.[3]

Reduce those chances by removing distractions when spending quality time together and showing your partner they have your full attention.

4. Hit the Gym as a Couple

One way you can spend more time together as a couple is by becoming workout partners. Studies show that couples are more likely to stay with their exercise routine if they work out together.[4] Couples also work out harder than they would solo. One study found that 95 percent of couples who work out together maintained weight loss compares to the 66 percent of singles who did.[5]

Join a gym, do at-home couples’ workouts, try couples yoga, hit the hiking trails, or get your bikes out. No matter which way you choose to exercise, these healthy activities can promote a healthy relationship.

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5. Cook Meals Together

Pop open a bottle of wine or put some romantic music on while you get busy – in the kitchen, of course!

One of the best relationship tips for spending quality time together when you both have busy schedules is to cook meals together.[6]

Spice things up and try and prepare a four-course meal or a fancy French dish together. Not only is this a fun way to spend your time together, but it also promotes teamwork.

If all goes well, you’ll have a romantic date night meal at home that you prepared with your four hands. And if the food didn’t turn out the way you’d hoped, you are guaranteed to have a laugh and create new memories together.

6. Have a Regular Date Night

Couples experience a greater sense of happiness and less stress when they are spending quality time together.[7] One of the biggest relationship tips for a healthy partnership is to include a date night in your weekly routine.

The National Marriage Project found that having a weekly date night can make your relationship seem more exciting and helps prevent relationship boredom.[8] It also lowers the probability of divorce, improves your sex life, and increases healthy communication.

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Some great ideas for what to do on your date night include:

  • Have a movie marathon – Gather up your favorite flicks and cuddle up on the couch.
  • Play games together – Cards, board games, video games, and other creative outlets are a fun way to spend quality time together.
  • Recreate your first date – Go back to that restaurant and order the same meal you did when you first got together. You can spice up your evening by pretending you’re strangers meeting for the first time and see how sexy the night gets.
  • Plan a weekend getaway – There’s nothing better than traveling with the one you love.
  • Dinner and a movie – A classic!
  • Try a new restaurant – Make it your mission to rate and try all of the Mexican restaurants/Irish pubs/Italian trattorias in your area.
  • Have a long sex session – Intimacy promotes the release of the oxytocin hormone which is responsible for a myriad of great feelings.[9]

Here’re even more date night ideas for your reference: 50 Unique and Really Fun Date Ideas for Couples

Final Thoughts

The benefits of spending quality time together are endless. Here are just some of the ways it can contribute to a healthy relationship:

  • Improves emotional and physical intimacy
  • Lowers divorce rates
  • Improves communication
  • Reduces marital boredom
  • Bonds couples closer
  • Improves friendship
  • Boosts health
  • Reduces stress

These are all excellent reasons to start making date night a regular part of your week.

It’s easy to have a healthy relationship when you set aside dedicated time to share with your spouse. Try new things together, make your spouse your workout buddy, and look for innovative ways to be close and connected.

These relationship tips will bring great benefits to your marriage.

Featured photo credit: Allen Taylor via unsplash.com

Reference

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