Advertising
Advertising

5 Things Independent Women Should Keep In Mind Before Starting A Relationship

5 Things Independent Women Should Keep In Mind Before Starting A Relationship

Independent women are used to making fulfilling their individual potential as their first priority, but they need to know that certain sacrifices and compromises need to be made in a relationship.

1. You don’t lose individuality, when your partner and you become “we”

Every independent woman is disgusted when couples become “we”, and there is no “I” anymore. “We like the film. We hate that new restaurant. We, we, we…” And all the independent women ask themselves, why has individuality disappeared and what happened to having your own opinion?However, there is nothing wrong with becoming “we”, and it is often an indicator of having a relationship with an actual future. Also, after a few years of a relationship, it’s normal that you are “we”, as you will have experienced a lot of things together.

Advertising

When you are an independent woman, becoming “we” is an improvement of a healthy relationship, because you’ll be aware of your needs and opinions, and at the same time share some thoughts with your loved one. Women who cannot imagine being alone or single tend to adopt all the habits and opinions of their partner, which results only in having an unfulfilled relationship, as you lose yourself in it. When you realize that your relationship has improved, don’t freak out, just go with the flow and enjoy sharing experiences, as your independence won’t let you forget your habits. Moreover, it will help you understand your partner’s habits and needs better.

2. You will not put your partner in first place, but he will become one of your priorities

When in a relationship, most women start neglecting their friends, family and, most importantly, themselves, as they put their partner first. An independent woman won’t let her relationship become an obstacle to having a life, but will have to learn that it is a huge part of their life. Being in a relationship doesn’t mean that you have to stop hitting the clubs with your friends, so, stop looking at it like an obligation, or even worse, a waste of time. When you get in a relationship, you need to invest in it, especially emotionally.

Advertising

As time goes by and you get attached to your partner, he will become one of your priorities, and you’ll learn when it is appropriate that he comes first, and when he needs to be second on the priority list. Keep in mind that he surely puts you on the top of his list too, and if you really love him, he deserves to be a consideration when certain decisions are made.

3. You don’t like compromise, but you’ll actually enjoy doing things your partner likes

As an independent woman, you certainly don’t like making compromises in a relationship, as you may think that your boyfriend is playing a minor role in the story of your life. Imagine that someone said this about you – you would feel unimportant, like you were insignificant to your partner. This might come as a shock to you, but when you are in an excellent relationship, it becomes the main story and your partner and you are the main characters. It won’t happen immediately, but as your relationship develops, you’ll find out that the relationship keeps you going in life and that your partner is the biggest support you have.

Advertising

Independent women have a huge advantage, because when making compromises they’ll actually understand their partner and his habits. This way you’ll avoid fights about what someone has done for the other in a relationship. Moreover, you won’t get bored by the things he likes, as you’ll make compromises reasonably and enjoy exploring your partner’s individuality. Getting to fully know one person is a beautiful experience, which you will understand and know to appreciate. Also, your partner will feel respected, as all independent women like to embrace their partner’s hobbies, habits and opinions, while also preserving their own.

4. You have high expectations and you won’t settle for less

Having high expectations is a good thing, and you know that there is a man who will meet these expectations. When you have certain expectations, such as wanting your man to be a gentleman and respectful of you, it means that you respect yourself and know what you deserve. Women who have expectations, know what they want from a man and respect themselves, will also know how to respect their partner and reach his expectations.

Advertising

Try not to set the bar too high for your partner, because there is no need to invest deeply in small details or petty matters. The only expectations you should have are regarding the way he behaves around you, and how he treats you. I am sure, that you as an independent woman know how you would like to be treated. Therefore, don’t settle for less.

5. You know how to spend a quality time with your partner

You don’t need anyone to keep you company and amuse you in order to have fun. When single, you explore many things and work on improving some of your skills. Moreover, you know how to have fun, and you don’t just wander aimlessly around your apartment and waste your time. So, when you start a relationship, you’ll know how to spend some quality time with your partner. Moreover, you’ll actually want to spend that time with him, and you’ll both know how to enjoy each other’s company. You know that the best time you can have with someone is a fun conversation over some nice wine, just enjoying the moment.

Being independent is a good thing, just be careful not to push your partner away by being cold and unavailable. Your characteristics will work for you – they’ll make your relationship healthy, fulfilling and fun. However, you’ll need to learn that, sometimes you just need to go with the flow and, most importantly, learn to let somebody else play a major role in your life.

More by this author

Katarina Milovanovic

Creative Writer

This Is What Happens When Someone Stops Using Heroin 4 Easy Ways to Avoid Procrastination When Working from Home 6 Unusual Ways in which Going Green Can Enrich Your Life Girl Power: Meet 5 Inspiring Female Entrepreneurs 6 Lifehacks to Make Money Even When You Are Unemployed

Trending in Communication

1 Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset 2 10 Strategies to Keep Moving Forward When You’re Feeling Extra Stuck 3 Learn the Different Types of Love (and Better Understand Your Partner) 4 Anxiety Coping Mechanisms That Work When You’re Stressed to the Max 5 How To Stop Insecure Attachment from Wreaking Havoc on Your Love Life

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on November 15, 2018

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

What do you think it takes to achieve your goals? Hard work? Lots of actions? While these are paramount to becoming successful in reaching our goals, neither of these are possible without a positive mindset.

As humans, we naturally tend to lean towards a negative outlook when it comes to our hopes and dreams. We are prone to believing that we have limitations either from within ourselves or from external forces keeping us from truly getting to where we want to be in life. Our tendency to think that we’ll “believe it when we see it” suggests that our mindsets are focused on our goals not really being attainable until they’ve been achieved. The problem with this is that this common mindset fuels our limiting beliefs and shows a lack of faith in ourselves.

The Success Mindset

Success in achieving our goals comes down to a ‘success mindset’. Successful mindsets are those focused on victory, based on positive mental attitudes, empowering inclinations and good habits. Acquiring a success mindset is the sure-fire way to dramatically increase your chance to achieve your goals.

Advertising

The idea that achieving our goals comes down to our habits and actions is actually a typical type of mindset that misses a crucial point; that our mindset is, in fact, the determiner of our energy and what actions we take. A negative mindset will tend to create negative actions and similarly if we have a mindset that will only set into action once we see ‘proof’ that our goals are achievable, then the road will be much longer and arduous. This is why, instead of thinking “I’ll believe it when I see it”, a success mindset will think “I’ll see it when I believe it.”

The Placebo Effect and What It Shows Us About The Power of Mindset

The placebo effect is a perfect example of how mindset really can be powerful. In scientific trials, a group of participants were told they received medication that will heal an ailment but were actually given a sugar pill that does nothing (the placebo). Yet after the trial the participants believed it’s had a positive effect – sometimes even cured their ailment even though nothing has changed. This is the power of mindset.

How do we apply this to our goals? Well, when we set goals and dreams how often do we really believe they’ll come to fruition? Have absolute faith that they can be achieved? Have a complete unwavering expectation? Most of us don’t because we hold on to negative mindsets and limiting beliefs about ourselves that stop us from fully believing we are capable or that it’s at all possible. We tend to listen to the opinions of others despite them misaligning with our own or bow to societal pressures that make us believe we should think and act a certain way. There are many reasons why we possess these types of mindsets but a success mindset can be achieved.

Advertising

How To Create a Success Mindset

People with success mindsets have a particular way of perceiving things. They have positive outlooks and are able to put faith fully in their ability to succeed. With that in mind, here are a few ways that can turn a negative mindset into a successful one.

1. A Success Mindset Comes From a Growth Mindset

How does a mindset even manifest itself? It comes from the way you talk to yourself in the privacy of your own head. Realising this will go a long way towards noticing how you speak to yourself and others around you. If it’s mainly negative language you use when you talk about your goals and aspirations then this is an example of a fixed mindset.

A negative mindset brings with it a huge number of limiting beliefs. It creates a fixed mindset – one that can’t see beyond it’s own limitations. A growth mindset sees these limitations and looks beyond them – it finds ways to overcome obstacles and believes that this will result in success. When you think of your goal, a fixed mindset may think “what if I fail?” A growth mindset would look at the same goal and think “failures happen but that doesn’t mean I won’t be successful.”

Advertising

There’s a lot of power in changing your perspective.

2. Look For The Successes

It’s really important to get your mind focused on positive aspects of your goal. Finding inspiration through others can be really uplifting and keep you on track with developing your success mindset; reinforcing your belief that your dreams can be achieved. Find people that you can talk with about how they achieved their goals and seek out and surround yourself with positive people. This is crucial if you’re learning to develop a positive mindset.

3. Eliminate Negativity

You can come up against a lot of negativity sometimes either through other people or within yourself. Understanding that other people’s negative opinions are created through their own fears and limiting beliefs will go a long way in sustaining your success mindset. But for a lot of us, negative chatter can come from within and these usually manifest as negative words such as can’t, won’t, shouldn’t. Sometimes, when we think of how we’re going to achieve our goals, statements in our minds come out as negative absolutes: ‘It never works out for me’ or ‘I always fail.’

Advertising

When you notice these coming up you need to turn them around with ‘It always works out for me!’ and ‘I never fail!’ The trick is to believe it no matter what’s happened in the past. Remember that every new day is a clean slate and for you to adjust your mindset.

4. Create a Vision

Envisioning your end goal and seeing it in your mind is an important trait of a success mindset. Allowing ourselves to imagine our success creates a powerful excitement that shouldn’t be underestimated. When our brain becomes excited at the thought of achieving our goals, we become more committed, work harder towards achieving it and more likely to do whatever it takes to make it happen.

If this involves creating a vision board that you can look at to remind yourself every day then go for it. Small techniques like this go a long way in sustaining your success mindset and shouldn’t be dismissed.

An Inspirational Story…

For centuries experts said that running a mile in under 4 minutes was humanly impossible. On the 6th May 1954, Rodger Bannister did just that. As part of his training, Bannister relentlessly visualised the achievement, believing he could accomplish what everyone said wasn’t possible…and he did it.

What’s more amazing is that, as soon as Bannister achieved the 4-minute mile, more and more people also achieved it. How was this possible after so many years of no one achieving it? Because in people’s minds it was suddenly possible – once people knew that it was achievable it created a mindset of success and now, after over fifty years since Bannister did the ‘impossible’, his record has been lowered by 17 seconds – the power of the success mindset!

Read Next