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Benefits of Being the Middle Child

Benefits of Being the Middle Child

Middle children have a reputation for often getting lost amid the noise made by their other siblings, since they do not get the attention associated with the firstborn, nor are they spoiled as the baby of the family often is.

Middle child syndrome is a term that often is used to describe negative feelings, symptoms and experiences associated with this conceivably undesirable birth order position, including: lack of motivation, feeling like they do not belong and negative feelings towards life in general. Children who are in the middle of the sibling lineup should not be written off, since there are some benefits of their unique position. Here are a few:

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We weren’t ever expected to be as responsible as the oldest sibling was

Being the middle child, we escaped the close scrutiny that often was experienced by our oldest sibling. Our parents often put pressure on the oldest child to get good grades, have a strong extracurricular schedule and take any type of additional educational enrichment courses available. We are glad that that kind of intense pressure did not get passed down along with the hand-me-downs. By the time we came around, our parents were much more relaxed and were more willing for us to do our own thing.

We are really independent

We lack our parents’ undivided attention, but this allows us to learn how to do things for ourselves and forge our own path. We memorized the public bus routes by the time we were in middle school, since our parents were more lenient about letting us go out on our own than they were with the oldest child. We were not babied like our young siblings, so we developed a keen sense of direction that has never led us astray.

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We are great leaders

Due to our strong independent natures, we often turn out to make great leaders. Past U.S. notable leaders that were middle children include Martin Luther King Jr., Susan B. Anthony, Bill Gates and Abraham Lincoln.

We like to think outside of the box

We often have a creative mindset, since our parents let us pursue our creative passions, like drama or art. Our older siblings were signed-up to do more traditional activities like sports or music and we are glad that we escaped that requirement.

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We work hard to establish ourselves

Having to constantly fight against our older and younger siblings for our parent’s affection has allowed us to develop a strong work ethic. We do not give up easily, whether it’s for a job or learning a new skill. This also translates to personal relationships- whether we place importance on maintaining a long-term friendship or kindling a new romance.

We have strong personalities

When you do not have a distinct role within your family, it is important to make one up for yourself. We often have a killer sense of humor or have an extroverted nature that comes in handy at social events.

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We are great at being selfless

We never knew what it was like to be an only child like our older sibling, or what it is like to be spoiled like our youngest sibling. The only world we are familiar with is the one where our possessions are passed down by our older sibling and where we often had to share a new toy with our youngest sibling. This translates into being humble as a grown-up and not taking anything for granted.

We are great negotiators

We are used to not getting our own way, so we have a finely developed ability to negotiate just about anything. This skill comes in handy in the workplace when negotiating a salary, and we are able to cope well in travel situations that call for being assertive.

Featured photo credit: Flickr via flickr.com

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Last Updated on November 5, 2018

8 Powerful Reasons to Love Your Enemies

8 Powerful Reasons to Love Your Enemies

We’ve all got our enemies; people who take pleasure in causing us pain and misery. Sometimes, the development of an enemy is due to certain differences in your characters and events have led to that. Other times, some people end up hating you for apparently no reason at all.

Regardless of how you got this enemy, as opposed to the paradigm of fighting fire with fire, consider the following reasons and see why you should actually appreciate your enemies. This article will show you not only how to not be bothered by your enemies, but how to actually foster love for them.

Read on to learn the secret.

1. It’s a practical lesson in anger management

To be honest, your enemies are the best people to help you understand your sense of anger management. When it might be true that your enemies have a way of bringing out the worst in you as regards anger, it is also true that they can help you in your quest to have that anger managed. You can’t get truly angry at someone you love and it is only in that time when you get truly annoyed that you learn how to manage it.

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Anger management is more effective when it is in practice and not in theory

Your enemies are like the therapists who you need, but actually don’t want. Inasmuch as you might want to hate them, they provide you an opportunity to control the anger impulse that you have.

2. It’s an opportunity for healthy competition

You might not know it, but your enemies make for great rivals as they help harness the competitor in you (sometimes, you might not even know or bee conversant with this competitive side until you come across an adversary). You get the right motivation to compete and this can go a long way to spur you to victory.

However, while doing so, it is also essential that you remember not to become a worse version of yourself while competing. Working against an adversary is tricky, and you need to ensure that you don’t cause harm to yourself or your morals in the process. Healthy competition is all you need to get out of this.

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3. Their negative comments can help you make a breakthrough

It is true that your enemies never really have much good to say about you. However, in as much as they might be talking out of a place of hate, there might be some truth to what they’re saying.

To wit, whenever you hear something mean or nasty from an enemy, you might want to take a step back and evaluate yourself. There is a chance that what this enemy is saying is true and coming to face that fact is a major step in helping you to become a better person overall. This is another testament to the fact that enemies can be therapists in their own way.

4. Enemies can also be powerful allies

Loving your enemies can also mean making an effort to interact and make peace with them. In the end, if you are able to establish some common ground and patch things up, you’ll have succeeded in making another friend. And who doesn’t need friends?

This can also help you in working with people in the long run. You get to hone your inter-personal skills, and that can be a big plus to your ledger.

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5. It gives you the ability to realize positivity

In a multitude of negativity, a speck of positivity always seems to find its way through.

Sometimes, a knowledge of the fact that you have enemies will also help you to focus on the many positives and good things that are in your life. A lot of times, we neglect what really matters in life. This can be due to being overly concerned with the enemies we have.

However, it is also possible for this acknowledgement to spur you to take a step back and appreciate the goo things (and people who surround you).

6. There might just be a misunderstanding

Sometimes, the reason why you have an enemy might be something very innocuous. You might not have known the cause of this fractured relationship and your enemy will help complete the picture.

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Simply approaching them will help you to understand the reason for the fracture. This, in turn, can help you to work towards healing your relationship moving forward. Misunderstandings happen, and you need to be able to work around them.

7. You learn to appreciate love as well

A constant reminder of the fact that there are enemies will also help you not to take those who love you for granted. Love and hate are two opposing emotions and it is possible for one to momentarily overshadow the other.

However, while you’ll always have enemies, there will also always be people who love you. These people need to be appreciated for what they do for you. Never let the hate projected to you from your enemies take the place of that.

8. Do you really need the hate?

The truth is that enemies bring only toxic emotions and generate bad reactions from you. If you’re truly to live a prosperous life, you can’t really be carrying all this baggage around.

Hate is bad and you should try all you can to get rid of it. It is a well-known fact that nobody can get really far in life while carrying a lot of emotional baggage. Well, hate is the biggest form of emotional baggage there is.

Featured photo credit: rawpixel via unsplash.com

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