Advertising
Advertising

How To Tell If Someone Is Cheating On You

How To Tell If Someone Is Cheating On You

A lot of relationships are haunted by the fact that their partners could be cheating on them. Some of them may purely rely on suspicions while some are simply paranoid. Some may trust their partners so much that they only leave the idea at the back of their heads and not entertain the situation. Even if we are in a very happy relationship, we must not deny that having a cheating partner is still a possibility. In case your suspicions start to grow then the following tips can be helpful for you. Here are a few tips on how to tell if someone is cheating on you.

Advertising

bi_graphics_7-ways-to-tell-someone-is-cheating-on-you

    Also, you might want to consider the following points:

    Advertising

    1. Trust your instincts. If you have a history of being paranoid all the time or are dealing with a lot of insecurities then this advice isn’t for you. But in any other case, your suspicion will not just fall on your lap unless your partner shows signs or suggests being unfaithful on his/her part. Listen deep inside your heart and start looking for evidences to prove your suspicion.
    2. If you can tell that there is already an emotional distance between you two then it can be possible that your boyfriend or girlfriend is cheating on you. An emotional distance is when things are no longer the same as they used to be, when you both started dating. For example, if your husband always expects you to massage him before going to sleep or he asks you to cook him his favorite meal on Friday dinners but lately he no longer asks for it then that could be something suspicious.
    3. When your partner no longer has enough time for you despite not being promoted at work or no new avenues such as a new business or a new hobby then that could be another sign that he/she could be cheating on you. Keep in mind that when this relationship started, both of you were around each other all the time and changing that part means something has changed.
    4. When your partner no longer wants to experience a special moment in his life with you then that means something fishy. For example, if it is your couple’s dream to travel in Europe but when your partner finally got the chance to do so yet is not considering having you but instead travels with friends then that might mean that your growing suspicions are indeed true.
    5. If your partner ditches you or avoids spending time with you but instead lets you spend your free time with other people is another sign that he or she could be cheating on you. The rationalization of this scenario is that “if you can get to spend time with other people then it would be okay for me to hang around with other people as well”. It is a play-safe strategy to cover up for infidelity in case he or she gets caught hanging around with the person they’re is cheating with.
    6. People who are constantly checking on their phones or someone who panics whenever someone calls them or receive a text message when their partner is around is most likely cheating on their partner. If you have nothing to worry about then you should feel secure if your partner checks on your phone. You should never be afraid to let your partner scroll through your inbox or phonebook if you aren’t doing anything that could upset him or her.
    7. If he or she used to be a mushy person who used to constantly remind you of their love for you but all of a sudden stopped being cheesy with you anymore, it’ss also another sign of infidelity. Even if this could fall under the 2nd tip mentioned, it is specified because not all people have this aspect of their personality and this could make a partner easily detect cheating.
    8. Cheating can drain your partner’s emotional and physical energy because they spend a lot time dealing with fear of being caught and clearing evidences that can prove their infidelity. If you can notice that your partner is frequently tired and exhausted even if all he/she did is a regular day’s work then that could possibly be because he or she has been cheating on you.
    9. Knowing that your partner has been going out a lot lately and having fun with a new found friend that hasn’t been introduced to you yet is also another sign. Once that newfound friend has been confirmed to be someone of the opposite sex then it is time to keep a watchful eye on your partner.
    10. Another tip in order to tell if someone is cheating on you is when they turn the tables on you accusing you of infidelity even if you are doing nothing and are totally innocent. This is a defensive mechanism for a cheater so that the spotlight will be taken away from him or her and the focus will be on the partner. If that person will be very hysterical even with just a very small yet unreliable evidence for his or her suspicion then that could mean the other way around.

    Infidelity is one of the biggest reasons out there why relationships fail. However, if you are just relying on suspicion towards your partner, then you might as well get some evidence before you accuse him of cheating. Trust is a major factor in a relationship and if you mistakenly accused him or her of something that he or she didn’t commit, then that goes to show that you do not fully trust your partner, yet. Gather concrete evidence or witness the act of infidelity yourself. The tips mentioned above will only support your suspicions but they do not do anything towards getting some evidence or proof of your partner’s cheating ways. Do not get carried away by your suspicions. Evidence and proof will further cement a conclusion and not suspicions. Do not stain your relationship by putting down judgment based on an unproven suspicion.

    Advertising

    Advertising

    More by this author

    6 Reasons Why French Press Makes the Best Coffee 9 Things To Remember If You Love Someone Who Doesn’t Easily Show Affection 12 Ways To Earn More Money While You Have A Full-Time Job 7 Steps to Reduce Your Laptop’s Fan Noise & Increase Speed 7 Ideas To Decorate Your Home Using LED Strip Lights

    Trending in Communication

    1 How to Talk to Strangers Without Feeling Awkward 2 What Are Interpersonal Skills? Master Them for Better Relationships 3 How To Stop Negative Thoughts from Killing Your Confidence 4 This 4-Year Old Girl’s Explanation On the Problem with New Year’s Resolutions Is Everything You Need 5 What You Really Need to Feel Secure in a Relationship

    Read Next

    Advertising
    Advertising
    Advertising

    Last Updated on January 15, 2019

    How to Talk to Strangers Without Feeling Awkward

    How to Talk to Strangers Without Feeling Awkward

    Many of us feel awkward talking to strangers. I’m a very outgoing person, even though I sometimes feel uncomfortable walking up to someone and asking a question or starting a conversation. I consider myself pretty high up on the extrovert meter. So what is it that makes us pause and become worried or anxious about talking to people we don’t know?

    In this article, we will discuss why we feel this way as well as some tips on how to talk to strangers without feeling awkward.

    Step right up, don’t be shy!

    Why We Feel Awkward Talking to Strangers

    The next time you feel uncomfortable talking to a stranger, tell yourself that’s completely normal. There are numerous reasons why it’s actually natural to feel awkward talking to strangers:

    Our Stress Levels Rise Around Strangers

    Numerous studies have show that our levels of cortisol go up when we are around strangers.[1] Cortisol is the hormone inside of us which produces stress responses.[2]
    So there you go, right off the bat you can see part of your standard response to strangers is due to a chemical reaction!

    A very interesting by product of increased cortisol is that it makes us less empathetic. More than likely this can be traced to our evolution. The increase in the cortisol and the corresponding decrease in empathy makes us want to stay away from strangers. We are biologically wired to feel concern around strangers.

    Evolution Taught Us to Be Wary

    Evolution has also taught us to be wary of strangers in general. Humans as a whole have spent a large chunk of their history banded together in small protective groups. We did this in order to help protect each other and maximize resources.

    When you think about it in this context, outsiders to our small groups or strangers are considered potential threats. Fear of strangers is common across almost all human cultures.

    Culturally Conditioned

    We can also thank our society for helping us feel uncomfortable and sometimes afraid of strangers. The term “stranger danger” is something most of us can relate to either growing up or raising kids. Or both.

    I remember hearing this from my parents, mostly about not getting in someone’s car I didn’t know. And as the father of 2 teenage girls, you can be sure I’ve talked to them about this very concept more times that they want to hear.

    The thought that strangers can be dangerous is built into us as it is. Toss in the amplification of the media on strangers doing things such as kidnapping kids and it takes it to an even higher level.

    Advertising

    Now that we’ve reviewed some of the reasons why we are nervous, let’s look at why you should talk to strangers more.

    Benefits of Getting over the Awkwardness

    Let’s take a quick look at some of the advantages of how to talk to strangers without feeling awkward. These are some high level benefits of talking to strangers.

    1. Broadens Your Network

    After you talk to someone, you didn’t know previously they become someone you know at least a little bit. This alone helps broaden your network of people you know. This is helpful in many ways whether it is work related or socially related.

    2. Improves Your Communication Skills

    I am a huge proponent of the value of solid communication skills and have written about it often. The more you talk to people, especially people you don’t know, the better your communication skills become.

    Interacting with a wider variety of people will bring the added benefit of improving your communication skills.

    3. Continually Learning

    So many of us don’t actively seek to learn new things. This is one of the primary keys to staying engaged in life and our own personal self fulfillment.

    Almost every time I speak to someone I didn’t know previously, I’ve learned something new. When we speak to strangers, it pushes us out of our comfort zones and we tend to learn new things.

    4. Increases Self Confidence

    Every time we learn to do something we were previously anxious about, we feel better about ourselves.

    Forcing ourselves to talk to strangers will lead to increased self confidence. As we get more and more comfortable doing something that previously made us feel awkward, our self confidence will go up and up.

    So, how to talk to strangers to reap these benefits?

    How to Talk to Strangers

    Here are some tips to on how to talk to strangers without feeling awkward.

    Advertising

    1. Say Hello

    Putting “say hello” first may seem a bit obvious but let’s take a deeper look. Much of the social awkwardness when speaking to strangers is simply breaking the ice. The first words that will engage someone.

    Most people will respond when someone says hello or hi to them. And those that don’t, you probably don’t want to talk to anyway.

    Practice being the person that opens the door to a conversation. Say hello.

    2. Ask About Them

    Something that I have noticed over the years is that people love to talk about themselves. Even fairly private people tend to open up when asked about events in their lives.

    You can ask leading questions that get people to talk about themselves and recent events. Things like recent movies watched or the summer vacation are great to get someone talking.

    As a father, I also know that people love to talk about their kids. Asking about kids is a fairly easy topic to bring up and in general, most people will expound upon all the great things their kids do or are involved with.

    3. Just Do It

    One of the biggest reasons we don’t do things we want to or know we should is because we overthink it. Quit thinking about it so much and just do it.

    When you give yourself the time to analyze every little angle about a situation, you also give plenty of time to talk yourself out of it. You’ll wind up thinking what if this happens or what if that happens.

    Try to force yourself to jump right in without thinking about it too much. Whenever I have done this, I always feel great about it afterwards, no matter how it turned out.

    4. Don’t Take It Personal

    One of the greatest lessons in life I ever learned was don’t take anything personally. We all go through life with our own sets of experiences and see things through our own lens. The way people react to different situations has almost nothing to do with us. It has to do with previous experiences and the way people feel about things other than us.

    When someone’s reaction isn’t what you’d hoped or expected, chances are it has nothing to do with you. Remember that and keep it in context.

    Advertising

    5. Get a Chuckle If Possible

    I used the word chuckle purposely because it makes me laugh. In my opinion, it’s one of those funny words. We all like to laugh because it makes us feel good. And when someone makes us laugh, we typically remember those people in a positive light.

    One of the best ways to make a conversation easy and free flowing is to get some laughter going. It doesn’t mean you have to be the master joke teller or anything. See if you can work in a way to make the person you are talking to get a smile or some laughter in. In fact, laughing at yourself maybe a nice try.

    6. Detach

    A great feeling is when you don’t mind which way something turns out, that you will be fine no matter what happens. Kind of like when I watch my two favorite football teams play against each other. I don’t really care who wins, I just want a fun game.

    Treat talking to strangers the same way. You don’t really care how the conversation goes because you are detaching from the outcome. Make it a fun time with yourself and if the conversation goes well, awesome! If not then no big deal, move on.

    7. Share Your Stories

    Well, all like to feel connected to other people. And many times we wind up hanging out with people that we have things in common with. No surprise here.

    To help with how to talk to strangers without feeling awkward, tell stories that have commonalities with the person you are talking to. Kids are an easy one. I have a daughter who was a competitive cheerleader and now plays club volleyball. I have instant connection and stories with strangers I speak with who have kids that play sports. It’s easy to relate to.

    So when you are speaking to a stranger and you have a story or mutual connection point, bring it up.

    8. Give a Compliment

    Almost everyone likes hearing a compliment, whether they admit to it or not. As a general rule, we don’t give out enough compliments. It’s amazing how one small remark someone tosses your way about how good you look can literally make your entire day.

    When you are speaking with someone you don’t know, see if you can work a compliment in. Nothing creepy here. Not a good idea to tell someone you just met that they are the prettiest or handsomest person you ever met. However, if you can share how you like their tattoo or shoes or something like that, it will help put the conversation into an easy going, smiling place.

    9. Relax Your Body Language

    If you go into a situation all worried and nervous, it shows on your body. Your shoulders are tensed up, there’s a look of consternation on your face, things like that.

    When you engage a stranger in conversation, make it a point to relax your body language. Take a deep breath before you engage the person, let your body relax, and put a smile on your face. This will help relax you and it has the added benefit of putting the other person more at ease.

    Advertising

    If they see that you are relaxed, it helps them relax. Plus having open, engaging body language is very conducive to inviting someone to open up into a conversation with you.

    10. Practice, Practice, Practice

    Like everything else in life, talking to strangers gets easier with practice. The more you do it, the easier it becomes.

    Make it a point to talk to several strangers each week and it will definitely help you relax as you do it more and more.

    After a while, it will become something you don’t even think about, you just do it. And that takes all of the awkwardness out of being in these type situations.

    The Bottom Line

    As we have seen, it is perfectly natural to feel awkward talking to strangers. We are biologically built that way and we have our own society constantly warning us how dangerous it is. It’s no wonder we feel awkward talking to strangers!

    There are numerous benefits to learning to be more comfortable talking to strangers. See if you can employ some of the techniques mentioned to learn how to talk to strangers without feeling awkward.

    Once you start practicing speaking with strangers more often and utilizing some of the tips, you will become more comfortable doing so. This in turn will lead to a learned new skill and increased self confidence.

    Remember, everyone you know was a stranger at one time. Now get out there and make some new friends.

    More Resources About Strengthening Communication Skills

    Featured photo credit: Priscilla Du Preez via unsplash.com

    Reference

    Read Next